by Jake Bible
"But it's Steph," Antoinette says.
"It's Steph," I say.
"It's Steph," Marcie agrees and nods at Audrey.
"Antoinette? You and Marcie go up and get her. Take the kid along," Audrey says.
She's taken over for Steph. None of us argue because it's how things work for us. One falls and another steps up. No questions. No egos. We ain't dumb guys. We don't measure dicks and puff up our chests. Shit needs to be done so shit gets done. Audrey is getting shit done.
"El? You're with me," Audrey says. "We make sure these Doyles stay down and cover the ways in and out of this floor."
Antoinette, Marcie, and a reluctant Froggy Girl, head back upstairs to get Steph's body as I continue stabbing the shit out of some Doyle skulls. Audrey falls in behind me.
"I don't like the idea of going back down into that tunnel," Audrey says.
I look up at her after jamming my blade through a Doyle's left eye and nod.
"They're waiting," I say and tap my nose. "I can feel it."
"Me too," Audrey says, her eyes locked onto the hallway that leads to the basement door. "We step one foot through there and they'll tear us apart."
"Maybe not," I say and point my blade at the bodies around us. "We're pretty good at tearing too."
"They'll have position and I'm guessing they'll have numbers," Audrey says.
"One way to find out," I say and smile. It's my Elsbeth Has Gone Crazy smile.
"El, no," Audrey says as I start walking down the hallway. "El!"
"Just gonna have a looksee," I reply and put fresh magazines in my .45s. "Not gonna start anything, just a little looksee."
"Shit," Audrey growls and follows me.
We get to the basement door and listen, each of us on one side of the door. No way we're putting our ears right to the door. That's how dumbasses get shot. Make too much noise and anyone on the other side starts in with the bang bang bang.
Audrey frowns at me and shakes her head. I don't hear shit either. I tap the butt of one of my .45s against the door and we both cringe back, ducking and covering our heads, ready for the bang bang bang. Nothing happens.
My turn to frown and shake my head. I reach for the doorknob, but Audrey grunts and I pull my hand back. She smacks the door as hard as she can with the butt of her rifle.
Oh, here comes the bang bang bang.
The door is shredded by automatic gunfire. Shredded. Shred. Ed.
We run.
The door is nothing but splinters behind us and we sprint into the lobby, getting around the corner as fast as possible as the bullets coming through the door keep on flying and tear up the hallway. I start picking up as many weapons as possible and piling them next to me as Audrey drags bodies to the head of the hallway, tossing them on top of each other like a dead flesh barricade.
A bullet whizzes past her and she cries out. Not in pain, but in rage. Audrey can get really pissed off if she wants to. It looks like she wants to.
The door to the stairwell opens and we glance over to see Antoinette giving us a What The Fuck Is Going On look.
"We knocked!" I shout at her over the gunfire. "I think they are coming in!"
She hits the ground and drags Steph's body out of the stairwell with Marcie and Froggy Girl on the ground behind her. They crawl their asses over to our flesh barricade and stay low as the bodies jump and jitter from the hundreds of bullets coming at us.
I count in my head and it's five minutes of non-stop shooting before the last shot goes quiet. My ears are ringing and I can tell by the way the sisters yawn and shake their heads that theirs are too. Froggy Girl just looks like she needs to take a shit. Her face is all bunched up and her eyes are filled with tears.
"We use theirs and save ours for the street," Audrey says as we pick up the Doyles' weapons and get ready. "Empty everything down that hall then make a break for it out the front doors."
"Steph?" Marcie asks. "We going to leave her here now?"
"No," Audrey says. "Yes."
"That's confusing," I say. "Use your words."
"We're leaving her here, but not as some corpse," Audrey says. "Decoy."
We know exactly what she means. I get to work on it and grab Steph's corpse. I sit her up, put a rifle in her hands, and then set the grenades. It's tricky to prep grenades to blow without blowing yourself up too. I'm good at it. I know how to set traps. Not because of Foster's training, but because of my years hunting people as a canny. Use what you know and move on. No guilt.
"Ready," I say.
We look up over the flesh barricade and see men start to come through the annihilated basement door. Some are dressed in fatigues, some in just normal clothes. They all have automatic rifles up and aimed at us.
We open fire.
The three men on point lose their heads right off. We drop them fast and take aim at the second row, but those guys don't wait around, they dive to the floor and roll into the empty offices along the hallway. The third wave take a knee and return fire, making us duck back behind the flesh barricade.
The barricade bodies shudder against us and some nasty fluids start pouring out onto the floor. Blood, shit, piss, whatever else. Probably stomach yucks and that crap. I think the guy right by me had burritos for lunch. Bad burritos.
When there's a break in the shooting, I'm ready. I prepped a surprise for the Doyles.
"Don't shoot!" I yell in a deep, man's voice. Kinda. It sounds like a woman doing a deep, man's voice. But that's cool. "Don't shoot!"
I have a dead Doyles' head on the end of one of my blades and I stick it up over the barricade for his bros to see.
"Put the guns down, bros!" I shout. "They's just lonely old women looking for some long-time lovin'! No threat at all! Come and get some, bros!"
"Really?" Marcie whispers at me, looking shocked.
That makes me happy. They've known me long enough that I didn't think I could shock any of them anymore. I wiggle the puppet head at her then turn it back to the Doyles.
"Come on, bros! Can't have a party if you kill all the pussy!" I shout.
"Jesus," Audrey says. "You are fucking sick in the head."
"Thanks," I whisper.
"You fucking cunts!" one of the Doyles yells down the hallway. "You're gonna pay for that!"
"No need to pay, bros! These bitches be giving it away!" I yell in my man's voice. I bob the head up and down, moving it back and forth. "Ooh, baby! Yeah, that feels good! Give it to me hard!"
"You got that backwards," Antoinette says. "He'd be giving it to you hard."
"Oh, shit, right," I reply and clear my throat. "I, uh, mean, I'm giving it to you hard!"
"You fucking whores!" another Doyle yells. "We're gonna hurt you! Hurt you right where it hurts!"
"That guy sounds like you, El," Audrey says. "Hurt you where it hurts. You two should hang out later."
"Fuck you," I laugh then flick the head off my blade and let it roll down the hallway at the Doyles. "Best head ever!"
They open fire again, but we're already crawling to the front doors. They're all boarded over and shit, but that doesn't mean a damn thing to us. If boarded-over doors were really a problem then no one could get in or out of a building in the apocalypse. We'd all just be standing in the streets and on sidewalks with our tits in our hands. Shit be boarded up everywhere.
Antoinette pulls a small pry bar from her pack and gets to work as we turn around and give her some covering fire. The hallway is at an angle to the front doors, so our bullets really just tear up the wall, but it lets the Doyles know we're still in the game. They're firing back at us and tearing up a wall a few feet from the front doors.
"Got it," Antoinette says as she yanks the last board free and puts her hand on the first door. "Ready?"
Audrey empties the rifle she's using and throws it across the room. I do the same with mine, so does Marcie. Antoinette is already strapped and good to go.
"Where's Froggy Girl?" I ask and look back towards the flesh barricade.
The dumb Inez is shitting herself and frozen against the bodies. "Girl! You better move your shit over here now or you're getting left behind!"
I'm done babysitting Froggy Girl. She led us to a dead end and Steph got killed because of it. I ain't blaming Froggy Girl, but I ain't gonna carry her ass anywhere either.
Froggy Girl looks at us, her eyes wide with pussy-ass terror.
"It's the zombie apocalypse, bitch! Get over that shit and move your tits!" I yell at her.
She flinches, but doesn't move.
"Fuck her then," Audrey says and nods at Antoinette. "Go!"
Antoinette yanks the door open and we bust ass out into the street. Tons of Zs come at us right away, all drawn by the noise of gunfire. There are at least three times as many as before. Not surprising.
We have blades out and guns secured. No need to add to the noise by coming out shooting. Best to stab and hack our way through the horde so that the Doyles are the only ones making noise. The Zs will want our delicious lady flesh, but they are dumb as shit and the gunfire still going on inside the courthouse will draw a lot of them that direction and away from us.
I slash at a Z and take her head right off then spin and cut down a second and a third, chopping their legs off so they're just flailing dipshits. Hands grab at me and I send a few of those falling to the ground as I stab Z after Z through the eye sockets. Always aim for the eye sockets. Less resistance. There's some skull at the back, but not enough to matter and it's soft bone. Foster taught us that to use on the living. Works just as well on the dead.
The sisters are keeping things tight. We're a swirling unit of brutal violence. Heads are popping off like those dandelions that are everywhere in the summer. Pop, pop, pop. If we can't reach heads then we take off legs. If legs aren't easy to get to then we take off arms. But no matter what, every slash counts for something. No wasted energy. Can't afford that when you're fighting through a Z-horde.
"How many are we looking at?" Audrey shouts.
Antoinette is tall and gets on her tiptoes just after slicing three heads off with one stroke. Bitch is badass.
"Lots!" she yells and comes down in time to keep her balance as six Zs lunge at her.
I step in and take down four while she deals with the other two. It's just a pile of undead limbs and torsos at our feet. The heads have rolled off somewhere. Heads will do that when they ain't attached to necks no more.
"We have another block of Zs before we can get clear!" Antoinette announces.
We nod at each other and keep pushing through.
Audrey is on point and keeps us headed in the right direction while Antoinette handles left and I handle right. Marcie is on our six and she keeps the horde from closing in on our backs and taking us out from behind. But the Zs try. They're Zs. Those sons of bitches never give up.
"Alley!" I yell as I see an opening coming up to our right. "Use it or keep going?"
"Could be a dead end!" Audrey shouts. "Keep going!"
We move another few feet and another, constantly spinning, always moving, our blades slashing and cutting and chopping and—
"WAIT!" Froggy Girl screams from the courthouse as she comes out of the doors with a rifle in each hand. "WAIT!"
She opens fire on the Zs in front of her. She's firing from the hip and both rifles are barking lead into Z bodies. She has shit for aim that way, but downs enough Zs to get through part of the horde before she's surrounded. What the fuck did she think was going to happen? She's an Inez, not a sister.
"Help me!" she screams as one of her rifles jams and she tosses it aside. "Help me!"
"Fuck her," Audrey snarls as she cuts a Z in half right down the middle.
She kicks the halves out of the way, spins and chops off some Z legs then hacks two more Zs' arms off before stabbing them in the heads. Nice.
Froggy Girl is yelling at us to help her. She keeps saying please like that word means shit when you are smack dab in the middle of a Z-horde. What, I'm going to die because she's being polite? Fuck that shit.
"Move ass!" I yell back at her. "Do it yourself or die!"
She's screaming at me, but I ignore her. I have Zs to kill.
Five reach in at me, but Marcie spins around and hacks the arms off of three below the elbows before they can grab me. I stab, stab, stab them in their heads and they fall as the other two slam into me. I can't afford to go down, so I let them back me up against Antoinette. She knows what to do and does her own stabbing as I push the two Zs back far enough for her to have a shot.
With her attention on me, that means the Zs on the left are closing in fast. I return the favor and help Antoinette cut them back enough that we both have a little breathing room.
"Shit," Marcie says and laughs. "The girl is making it."
Froggy Girl empties her last rifle into the horde and kills enough Zs that she's got almost a clear path to us. I ain't big on crazy chicks shooting rifles in my direction, but I'll let it slide this time since she's in trouble.
"Use it like a club!" I yell at her as she starts to drop the empty rifle. "Beat some Z ass!"
She flips the rifle around and smashes her way through the horde. A Z grabs her by the hair, but she yanks herself free. Not without a price. That Z takes a huge hunk of hair with it and Froggy Girl screams as blood starts pouring down the back of her scalp and neck.
Shit. That's a lot of fresh blood.
"Faster!" I yell at her.
We're next to the alley and I glance over and see it's not a dead end. It opens up onto the next street over.
"This way!" I yell and hack to the right. "It's clear!"
Zs are stupid. They follow each other in hordes and herds and packs and shit. If Zs are walking on the street then other Zs join them and it turns into a stupid Z parade. They don't wander off like tourists. Alleys mean nothing to Zs unless there are noises coming from them saying it's food time.
I slash through eight Zs and I'm in the alley. I hold my position and give the sisters time to follow me. Yeah, now that we're in the alley the Zs are interested, but they don't have us surrounded anymore.
Froggy Girl screams. It's a healthy rage scream, not a pain scream. Easy to tell the difference.
"We leave her," Audrey says as she jams her blade up through the chin of a Z. "She had her chance."
"No shit," I say and drop three more Zs. "But don't mean we can't help."
I pull a grenade from the side of my pack, yank out the pin, and toss it into the horde.
"Frag out!" I yell and we move ass down the alley.
The grenade goes off and I kinda hope it hasn't ripped Froggy Girl into a hundred chunks. If she was smart then she ducked down when I yelled. If she wasn't smart then the Zs will be distracted by her fresh meat that's all over the street.
That rhymes. Meat and street.
We don't stop or look back until we're at the next street over. There are a few Zs in the street, but not even close to enough for us to worry about. I glance over my shoulder and Froggy Girl is running her ass off down the alley to us. Good for her.
"She keeps up on her own from now on," Audrey says as Froggy Girl reaches us. She's all covered in Z gore, but I don't see any bite marks. "You hear that, girl? You keep up or get left behind. We aren't gonna save your ass again."
"I hear that," she says.
That's not all we hear.
"Engines," Marcie says.
"More Doyles," Froggy Girl says and looks up and down the street. "We go this way. We can cut through that building. They'll pass right by us."
"That the direction we need to go?" Audrey asks. "To get to our Humvees?"
"You left them in a garage back by where you killed all my friends, right?" Froggy Girl asks. Ain't no anger in the question. Sounds like she's made peace with us taking out the Inezes. Not like she has much of a choice, really. "If you left them back that way then yes, this is the way to your Humvees."
"Good," Audrey says. "Lead on."
She does.
Chapter
Eight
"What the fuck is this place?" Audrey asks as we squeeze between some boards after Froggy Girl. "What the hell?"
It is a weird place. There's lots of bright-colored shit. Yeah, it's got dust all over it, but you can still see the bright colors. Looks like…
"Indoor playground," Froggy Girl whispers. "I used to play here as a little girl. I liked the tunnel up on the ceiling."
We all look up at the bright orange tunnel that's bolted to the ceiling. Every few feet there is a plastic window. A tickle at the back of my mind tells me I've been in one of these places before. Maybe when I was a kid too? I bet my nanny brought me here. Not my mother because she was too busy and too much of a cold bitch to do that. But, my nanny, for sure.
My nanny? That's a weird memory. Did I have a nanny?
"Why are you whispering?" Antoinette asks Froggy Girl. "This place hasn't been cleared?"
"No," Froggy Girl replies quietly.
She points back up at the tunnel on the ceiling. We all squint in the gloom and then gasp as Z faces show up against the plastic. Little Z faces. Undead kids.
I fucking hate undead kids.
"Don't worry," Froggy Girl whispers. "They're stuck up there. They aren't smart enough to figure how to get out. They get jammed in a bend, go back the way they came, then get jammed in that bend. Back and forth."
"But we don't want them moaning and groaning," Audrey says. "They'll bring more Zs."
Froggy Girl nods.
"This way," she whispers and leads us around old play equipment to a door across the room.
It's a big room. The whole ground floor is one giant room with support beams here and there. There are plastic slides. Some small, some big. Plastic houses, plastic animals to ride, plastic picnic tables. A lot of plastic.
And a lot of bloodstains. Most of the plastic shit is covered in it. Might have been kid blood, might have been mommy blood. Ain't no way to tell now. It's all dried and brown. No bodies around to know for sure.
We keep moving, our eyes glancing up at the tunnel now and then. The Z faces are gone, but we can hear them scurrying around like hamsters. The tunnel shakes a bit as they move and we give each other a look when we see what's gonna happen.