"You'll pay someone else to take care of me!" Tess screeched. The meaning of her daughter's words roared through her head. "What if ah have a stroke, what if ah slobber and wet my bloomers? Ah wiped your spit and changed your diapers." She stared up at her daughter as though seeing her for the first time. Ivy was ... pretty.
"If only you'd put your arms around me, just once. If you'd only said something nice instead of bitching and screaming at me. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that. I'm sorry about all of this. I shouldn't have intruded on you."
"Now you say that. After you destroy me with all those nasty, cruel things you just said to me. I won't even come to your wedding, // you ever get married," Tess said spitefully. "You're a nasty girl."
"It'll be your loss then, Mama. You see, by hook or by crook, I'm going to marry Riley Coleman. He doesn't know it, but he will soon enough."
"You're what?" Tess hissed. She took a second look at her daughter. She was more than pretty. She was fashionable-looking. She'd lost weight, at least thirty pounds. Riley Coleman. Memories of Ivy tagging after Riley, calling him at Yale. She'd paid the telephone bills. It wasn't impossible.
My God, Tess thought. I backed the wrong horse.
Ivy walked out of the room and didn't look back. She knew she wasn't leaving much behind, and it didn't matter anymore. Lacey had survived and so would she.
Billie and Thad arrived at Sunbridge when the Senate recessed for the holidays. For Amelia's sake, Billie said.
The prairie-pink house had been aired and cleaned, but it seemed empty, with Cole not there anymore and Riley off on another probably futile trip to South America. Thad and Billie, with Maggie and Rand's help, trekked out to the fields to select a twelve-foot spruce, hauling it back in the pickup truck. Rand and Thad argued and snapped at each other as they struggled to
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get the monstrous tree into the stand. Billie and Maggie clapped enthusiastically when the tree finally stayed erect.
"Artificial trees are easier to handle," Thad said airily.
Billie hooted. "He says that every year until I threaten to go to the attic and get it. Then he says, let's go chop one down. He dragged me, literally dragged me, one year into a raging blizzard to get one of the nicest trees we ever had. It was one of the best times of my life," Billie said, hugging Thad.
"It never seems quite like Christmas in Hawaii," Maggie confided, "but we do our best. One year we had this awful white thing with paper fans and bows for ornaments. I hated it. Then we had an artificial green one with crooked branches. Rand hated that one. Last year we had a real tree. We paid, if you can believe this, two hundred dollars for it. The day after Christmas all the needles fell off and we took it down."
Billie looked anxiously at her watch. "Cary and Amelia should be here by now. Thad, call and see if they left."
"Mam, Cary said they'd be here, and they will," Maggie said. "He brought all of Amelia's things earlier this afternoon. Her wheelchair is in the hall closet; so is her cane, the one with the prongs, and the walker. Cary felt if the things were here, she might use them. Having Cary carry them in in front of everyone seemed to disturb Amelia. I made up her room and it's waiting. I made up separate rooms. Cary said he's a restless sleeper and Amelia needs her rest."
"Since when? Cary always sleeps like he's dead," Rand joked. The look on Billie and Thad's face stopped him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that the way it sounded. Obviously, Maggie and I are not in on something that is going on here. If I'm not supposed to put my foot into something, maybe you better tell us what's going on."
"I've had the feeling for a long time that something... wasn't right," Maggie said. "You know what it is, Mam; so do you, Thad. I thought we were family. We're supposed to help one another. We never had secrets before."
Thad's nod prompted Billie to confide in Maggie and Rand. There, in the room with the fragrant Christmas tree and the blazing fire, Billie told them what Amelia had told her. Her eyes implored Rand to understand. She offered up a silent prayer of thanks when he nodded and smiled. She wound up her explanation with "I really feel it was a mistake to invite Julie, much as Thad and I love her, but Amelia insisted on it.
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She was adamant. Cary, of course, doesn't know Julie's coming. Amelia chose not to tell him."
"How are we going to carry this off, Mam?"
"By being ourselves and snowing our love for all of them. It's Christmas and we're together. This.. . this may be Amelia's last Christmas with us, so we must do what she wants. Cary will handle it; he has no other choice. Julie can handle it, too. At first Julie refused our invitation, but when I told her Amelia insisted, she gave in. Cole's picking her up tomorrow at the airport."
Thad changed the subject. As far as he was concerned, things would take care of themselves if left to the parties involved. "I understand Adam and his stepson will be here, and Sawyer has to stay in Japan. Billie, did we get presents for the boy?"
"Darling, we not only got presents for the boy and everyone else, they're all wrapped and in the closet. All you have to do is put them under this tree. Now, if you were awarding efficiency ratings, what would you give me?" Billie teased.
"A ten plus." Thad smiled at his wife. "What's on our menu Christmas Eve?"
"That's been taken care of, too, but it's a secret," Billie said. "Maggie, Jeff and I are cooking it from scratch. We're going to show that boy what a real Texas Christmas is like. It'll cheer Adam up, too. He's patient, but he's chomping at the bit to get married."
"I'm for whatever makes everybody happy. You are looking at one almost happy fella," Thad said exuberantly. "In another ten days I will be Thad Kingsley, private citizen."
"Hear, hear! Hey, I hear a car." Rand peered through the curtains.
While Thad joined Rand at the front door, Maggie whispered in her mother's ear. "Mam, you aren't going to let Cary walk into this cold, are you? It's not fair. I'm sorry, but I don't agree with all of you about that. Julie knows he'll be here, and if she didn't know, I'd want her told, too. It's not right that he should just... find her here. It'll be a shock. Drop it in the course of conversation, please, Mam?"
"All right," Billie agreed. She felt better immediately. She hated secrets and tension, especially at Christmas.
Cary settled Amelia on the sofa in front of the fire. "What would you like to drink, honey?"
"Scotch, straight up." Cary raised his eyebrows. "The doctor said I could have it," Amelia lied. "I intend to have a
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cigarette, too. Don't any of you look at me like that. It's okay. Trust me."
"We do, Mother," Rand said, perching himself on the arm of the sofa. "'Everything in moderation' is what I always say."
"I always say that, too." Cary laughed.
Cole arrived at eight o'clock carrying an enormous Christmas wreath for the front door. "I knew you'd forget. For some reason, I've always gotten the wreath," he said, showing off the fragrant door decoration.
"That's because we can trust you to get the most beautiful, the most perfect, and of course, the reddest bow." His mother laughed. "Now, hang it up!"
They dined by the fire, using little tables, on thick sandwiches and hearty homemade soup. While Maggie cleared away the dishes and the men went to the attic for the decorations, Billie sat on the sofa with Amelia, clasping her hand.
"I'm glad you're going to stay here for the holidays, Amelia. I'll get to see you every day. Tell me the truth, how do you feel?"
"Good some days, bad others. I take it one day at a time."
"How are things with Cary?"
Amelia hesitated for a moment. "I don't really know. He treats me wonderfully. He can't do enough for me. He even reads to me, if you can believe that. I've done everything but push him out the door. He won't leave me, even for a second. Guilt, Billie, is a terrible thing, and I don't want him feeling like this. He has terrible nightmares. I'm the one who made him move to the other bedroom. I hear him thrashing about all night long
. Short of telling him I know about Julie and telling him I forgive him, what else can I do? Billie, all I wanted was for him to be happy. Which just goes to show you can't tamper with other people's lives the way I did."
"Cary will come to terms with it all," Billie said softly. "I have to say I disagree with you about having Julie here for Christmas, though."
"Cary needs to see her. He needs to feel her presence. I don't think they've been in touch; I think I'd know if they had. I think Julie. . .broke it off when she heard I was ill. She's a good person, Billie," Amelia said in a choked voice.
"Amelia, you are the good person, the best in the world. I've never seen such generosity."
"Because I'm dying and I want my husband to be happy?"
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"Yes," Billie said bluntly.
"It gets easier as the days go on," Amelia lied.
"The family is dwindling. We used to be a big gang on the holidays. This year Sawyer and Riley won't be here, but we picked up Adam and Jeff. It's not the same," Billie said bleakly. "Christmas gets to me lately. I want us all together. If only Rand had been able to... What I mean is, if things had worked out, his daughter would be here. He wrote and asked Chesney to join us. She declined, but nicely. Said she was flying because she wanted the married stewardesses to be home with their families, and since she had no husband or children, it didn't make a difference to her."
"I don't buy her story one hundred percent," Amelia said sourly. "No matter how hard I try, I can't accept what she's told Rand. Why won't she allow him to be a father to her? She sought him out, she upset his life, and don't for one minute think that happy facade he shows to all of us is real. He's so tormented it breaks my heart. She walks into his life, makes all her announcements, and then walks out. That's dirty pool, Billie."
"She's afraid, Amelia. She doesn't want to get hurt. You and I can't even begin to imagine what life in an orphanage would be like. Being abandoned and rejected—that has to stick with a child for a long time, sometimes all her life."
Amelia stared at Billie for a few seconds. "What goes around comes around, eh? Infancy to old age. How sad."
"Only if you want to be sad. Family, Amelia. I know," Billie said, holding up her hand, "that I've harped on that for years and years, but it's so true. Without family, what is there? Where would any of us be? Why don't you write Chesney a letter, Amelia. Tell her about her father and her grandfather. Tell her about us, how we'd welcome her into our lives. I bet she'd not only answer the letter, but she'd also start doing some serious thinking. It's a start, Amelia."
"This time, old friend, I'm one step ahead of you. I did that two weeks ago. I was hoping for some kind of Christmas response, but as of today, none has arrived."
Billie laughed. "We all want everything yesterday. Time will take care of things, Amelia."
Amelia's face sobered. "It's my enemy, Billie."
"In a way time is everyone's enemy, Amelia. I don't want you thinking or talking like that. This is Christmas. We're going to love and share because that's what this family does best. Put on your happy face—the men are coming with the decorations.
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Three strong men to carry two boxes of very light Christmas ornaments." She laughed. "And Maggie supervising."
"I heard that," Thad shouted. "It's not the carrying, it was the seeking that almost did us in. Things like this should be kept in a hall closet."
"Absolutely not," Maggie laughed. "Keeping them in the attic, where you can't see them every day, adds to the mystique. Is mystique the right word? Not seeing them regularly makes the excitement of Christmas all that much more—"
"I think you just botched it all up, darling." Rand grinned.
The evening passed pleasantly. Cole circulated, spending time with his mother and Amelia. He excused himself once to make a phone call. Maggie met Billie's eyes. "I wouldn't swear to it, but I think my son is in love," Maggie said happily. "Wouldn't it be wonderful if there were two weddings in this family?"
"It certainly would," Billie said.
"How can you tell? That Cole's in love, I mean," Cary asked.
Maggie laughed. Billie joined in and Amelia smirked. "His eyes sparkle. He makes phone calls. He looks in the mirror all the time; he's more considerate. That's the biggie—consideration. He can't do enough for all of us. He's better than a trained dog right now. He loves to fetch. I just love the way he's acting. For a while there he was so down, I was getting worried."
"Now that you mention it, Maggie, I've noticed it myself. Cole's always been a gallant young man, but yes, these past days he's been acting differently," Billie agreed.
"Why don't we just ask him?" Thad muttered.
"We can't do that, darling. If Cole wants to share his happiness or his new love, he will. We can't. . . pry. We can't... but you or Rand or Cary, that's man stuff. We'll wait right here while you find out." Billie giggled.
Cary started to busy himself by closing the cardboard cartons. Rand gathered stray strands of tinsel from the carpet. Maggie stacked the cups and glasses on a tray. Billie stood behind Amelia's chair, massaging her thin shoulders. Thad was readying the camera for the picture session that was a Sunbridge ritual on Christmas Eve.
Cole's face was stretched wide in a grin when he entered the room. Guilt made everyone stop what they were doing to stare at him. It was obvious he was about to make an announcement. Maggie held her breath.
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"Grandma, would you mind an unexpected guest? It's unexpected because I wasn't sure if... she wasn't sure if she could get a flight. There was a last minute cancellation or something, so she can make it. Is it all right?"
"Cole, it's more than all right. Who is she? Does she have a name?"
Maggie walked over to her son. He put his arm around her shoulder and drew her closer to him. "Her name is Sumi."
"Cole! Sumi Hasegawa! Sumi! Mam, it's Sumi."
"Little Sumi!" Billie all but squealed.
"The prettiest girl in all Japan," Thad said, not missing a beat as he rolled new film into his camera.
"Congratulations!" Rand said, wrapping his wife and stepson in both his arms.
"I'll second that," Cary said warmly.
"Me, too," Amelia echoed.
"Wait a minute, all of you. She's just coming for Christmas. You act as if I asked her to marry me or something."
"You're going to, aren't you?" Thad queried.
"I might," Cole said uncomfortably.
"Cole, I'm so happy for you," Maggie said, squeezing his arm. "I adore Sumi. She's right for you, you know. Mam, why didn't we ever think of Sumi as a match for Cole before?"
Billie shrugged. "She's just like Otami. The firstborn and the last. I'm very happy for you Cole," Billie said, hugging her grandson.
"You look like you're alive. I'll give you that." Cary grinned. "Treat her like gold and you'll never be sorry. Isn't that right, honey?"
Amelia beamed. "He's on the money, Cole. From the day we were married Cary treated me as if I was gold. We're still hanging together." Only Billie heard the end of the sentence, "but by a very fragile string,"
Maggie pushed the dishes out of the way. "Sit down, Cole, and tell me all. I didn't even know you knew Sumi. When did you meet her? Oh, I'm so happy she's coming. Mam," she said, turning to her mother, "this means we hit the stores tomorrow, bright and early."
"I'll make a list. Did you get something for Sumi, Cole?"
Cole flushed. "I picked it out. ... I wasn't sure ... All I have to do is pick it up."
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"Let me take a picture of this happy group," Thad said, focusing the camera. "Everyone say cheese. Cole, I've never seen you so happy."
"Me either," Maggie said proudly.
"I took a week's vacation and went to Japan. You all know that Mr. Hasegawa has been writing to me. I've been writing .... What I mean is, he needs to know ... I shared Riley with him, those bits and pieces he doesn't have. Riley would probably consider it interfering i
n his life, but I didn't see it that way. I wanted to see him, to comfort him, so I hopped in the DM. Sumi came in from the office the morning after I got there. I think I fell in love with her the minute I set eyes on her. The Japanese are so quiet and reserved. She says she loves me, but..."
Maggie hooted with laughter, and so did Billie. "Sumi quiet and reserved! You met your match, son! Sumi is a modern Japanese."
"Is she still sneaking cigars to her father?" Thad asked. Cole laughed and nodded.
They talked for an hour. Billie told him tales of a little Sumi and a teenage Sumi who gave her father gray hair. Maggie added what she knew. "Sawyer can tell you more. She and Sumi are buddies." Maggie laughed. "This is all so wonderful. Aren't Christmases wonderful?" Everyone agreed.
"I think I'm going to turn in, if you don't mind," Cole said. "Aunt Amelia, how would you like a ride upstairs in these strong, masculine arms?"
"That's my job," Cary said forcefully.
"Then I'll say good night. Grandma, what time do you want me to pick up Julie? I forgot to ask."
Thad immediately demanded that Cary pose with Amelia, just the two of them in front of the tree, for what he called a Christmas Eve eve picture. "You can handle it," he whispered in Cary's ear.
Thad squinted into the little window on his ancient camera. Only once before had he seen an expression like the one on Cary's face, which he was about to record. It was his own, the day Billie said she loved him. He snapped the picture.
Amelia sat propped up in bed. She was so tired she could hardly think straight. Each day it seemed she grew more weary, less anxious about life and what was going on around her. The one thing she forced herself not to do was fall asleep
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before Cary did. It was her special time, when she lay back in her nest of pillows and remembered. She'd stroke Cary's dark head, which was now speckled with gray. Lately, though, even that had been taken away from her, when Cary moved into the guest room. Tonight was a special treat for her. Maggie had apologized profusely, saying she'd made up the room for Cary next to Amelia's, but with Sumi coming, they'd need the room. She'd told Maggie not to worry, and Cary seconded her. They would sleep together, the way they had for years.
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