by Rhoda Baxter
She thought back to the terrible, paralysing fear. Would she have run? She realised that yes, she would have at least tried. But she hadn’t needed to. She was no longer afraid of Gordon. She was finally free from living under his shadow. She felt like she’d been let out of prison.
‘First rule of self-defence,’ said Hibs. ‘If you have the chance to run away, get the hell out.’ He took out glasses and a bottle of wine.
Beth nodded. She didn’t know what else to say. Hibs clearly didn’t share her sense of exhilaration.
She watched him carefully as he poured two glasses of wine. He slid one towards her and took a large gulp from the other. He was scowling. She could see the tension still in his jaw.
‘Hibs. Are you okay?’
He didn’t look at her. ‘I’m okay.’ He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘I’m sorry, Beth. I’m just fighting the urge to go back and hunt that bastard down. If I hadn’t got there when I did … I just …’ He opened his eyes and Beth saw the confusion of feelings in them. ‘If he’d hurt you, I would have broken his arms.’ He took another gulp of wine.
Seeing Hibs, who was normally so unflappable, fighting to regain composure shocked Beth. Anger shot through her. Bloody Gordon. Bad enough he threatened her. But he had no right to affect Hibs like this. Her Hibs. Who was always there when she needed him. Who made her feel safe and wanted and strong. She was so angry she had a good mind to track down Gordon and beat him up herself. The strength of feeling surprised her. Why was she so protective of Hibs? The answer was there, waiting for her to find it. She loved him. She had loved him for months. Gordon’s influence had masked it, but the attraction to Hibs had always been there. She had mistaken it for friendship.
Hibs finished his glass of wine and sighed. He seemed to be getting back to his normal self now. He leaned against the work surface, his long legs stretched out. Beth stepped into the gap between them and gave him a hug. Hibs wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. She could hear his heart beating against her ear. ‘I love you,’ she said.
Hibs went still. ‘Pardon?’
She leaned back so that she could look at him. ‘I love you,’ she repeated.
The smile on his face could have melted an iceberg. Beth laughed. She took his face in her hands and kissed him. He kissed her back with ferocity. She reached inside his T-shirt and felt the sleek muscles underneath. A little shiver ran through him at her touch. She pulled at his top and he helped her pull it off him. Then he did the same with hers.
Still kissing, he moved her backwards into the living room until she landed on his sofa, displacing a pile of papers. He moved away from her lips and kissed his way down her body. Beth relaxed and let him work his magic. When he had carefully kissed, stroked and explored every part of her, he pulled her on top of him. Beth closed her eyes and felt the world explode in her head.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Clarissa had organised wine and nibbles for the launch of the WIS calendar. The bar in the Staff Club was crowded. All the men featured had been invited and Anna had arranged a display on one of the chrome tables so that she could sell the calendars.
Beth was apprehensive that Gordon might come to the event. She hadn’t seen or heard from him since the incident in the corridor a few weeks before. She hoped she’d seen the last of him, but she kept an eye on the door anyway, just in case.
Clarissa wafted over and handed her a glass of wine. ‘Well done, Beth. I have to admit, I didn’t think you’d manage it, but you’ve done a good job.’
Beth wondered if Clarissa realised how patronising that sounded. ‘Well thank you for your resounding endorsement.’ She waited for Clarissa to move off, but she seemed to have something on her mind. ‘Can I help you with something?’
Clarissa looked down at her glass. ‘Well, actually, I was wondering if … er … is Dr April single? Do you know?’
The naked guy? ‘I think he is, let me ask Anna.’
‘No. No. Don’t.’ Clarissa’s face flushed with what looked like panic. ‘It’s okay.’
‘He’s over there,’ said Beth. ‘You could talk to him. Do you want me to introduce you?’
‘I …’ Clarissa cast a quick glance across to where Dr April was chatting to Lara and, judging by Lara’s polite expression, boring her.
‘Better to regret something you’ve done than something you haven’t,’ Beth said. Seeing Clarissa hesitate, she grabbed her arm. ‘Come on. He’s really nice.’
She dragged Clarissa across the room. ‘Hi, Nick,’ she said.
‘Oh, hello.’ Dr April smiled, showing his even teeth.
‘Nick, this is Clarissa.’ Beth steered her over. ‘She’s the chairwoman of WIS. She works on hormones. Nick’s work is on kinase cascades.’
‘I know,’ Clarissa said. ‘I read the blurb on the calendar.’
‘Oh. Okay. I’ll leave you to connect up the two parts of the signalling pathway, then. I’ll just borrow Lara for a minute.’
As they walked off, Lara leaned in and whispered, ‘Thanks.’
‘You’re welcome.’ She studied her friend, noting that she looked a lot less teary than she had done in the weeks before. ‘How are things with you? You look … better.’
Lara nodded to acknowledge what she’d said, but didn’t smile. ‘I’m improving,’ she said. ‘It’s hard. I miss him. But I’m getting better at living without him.’
Beth put a hand on Lara’s arm and gave it a little squeeze. ‘It was the right thing to do then.’
Lara nodded. ‘Painful, but right. Yes.’ She gave Beth a small smile. ‘I’ll be okay. I’m getting on with stuff.’
They passed Anna, who was chatting up a random punter, persuading him to buy a calendar from her. ‘You could give it to your mum as a Christmas present,’ she said.
The guy laughed. ‘Tell you what; I’ll buy a calendar if you give me your phone number.’
‘Deal.’
Beth shook her head as Anna scribbled her number on a piece of paper. ‘Shameless.’
‘Seems to keep her happy.’ Lara turned and studied her. ‘And you? How are you coping?’
‘I’m okay, actually. I’ve started writing up my thesis. I feel so much better about everything now that I know I’m not going to be stuck in Roger’s lab forever.’
‘And how are things going with Hibs?’ said Lara.
Beth smiled and glanced over to where Hibs was chatting to one of the other men from the calendar. ‘He holds my hand.’
Turning back, she saw that Lara looked puzzled. She had to explain. ‘When Gordon and I walked anywhere, he used to put his arm around my waist and sort of pull me to him.’ She clamped her elbow to her waist to demonstrate. ‘It was really uncomfortable. Hibs doesn’t do that.’ She looked over to him again. ‘He holds my hand.’
‘You mean, he doesn’t treat you like you belong to him,’ said Lara. ‘It’s called respect, Beth. I don’t think you had much of that from Gordon.’
‘I know. I can’t believe I didn’t realise.’ Beth shook her head.
‘At least you’re rid of him now.’
Beth cast a quick glance towards the door as another group of people came in. ‘Although, I’m a bit concerned that Gordon might show up today.’
‘He wouldn’t dare try anything here. Not with all those people around. Just don’t go anywhere by yourself. Not even the loo, okay?’
Beth nodded. ‘I know.’
She spotted Dan Blackwood enter the room, closely followed by a teenaged girl. Beth caught his eye and waved. He came over.
‘I’ve got your prints for you,’ she said when he’d come near. She retrieved the bag from behind Anna’s stall and handed it to him.
‘Thank you.’ He handed her an envelope. ‘There’s your cheque.’
‘Come on, Dad, open it.’
Beth turned her attention to Dan’s daughter. Now that she’d figured out who she was, Beth could see the resemblance. She peered around Dan at the photos.
‘Wow. Did you take those?’ she asked Beth.
‘I did.’
‘They’re great.’ She nudged her father. ‘Dad, they make you look kinda dashing and Indiana Jones. No wonder Mum didn’t want you in the calendar.’
Dan tutted and rolled his eyes. ‘I’ll get you a drink. What do you want?’
‘Rum and Coke?’
‘You can have just Coke.’ He headed for the bar, leaving his daughter standing next to Beth, holding the photos.
‘Dad was really disappointed when Mum told him he had to pull out,’ the girl said. ‘I’m glad we’ve at least got the photos.’
‘I’m sorry your mother felt that way. It really isn’t that sort of calendar.’
‘Oh, I know,’ said the girl. ‘These guys are all, like, old.’
Beth tried not to laugh. To a teenager, they probably did look ancient.
‘Do you do events?’ said the girl suddenly.
The change of direction in the conversation threw Beth. ‘Pardon?’
The girl gave an impatient tut. ‘Do you do wedding photographs?’ she said, slowly and clearly.
Did she? Why not. She supposed she could.
‘My uncle’s getting married in the autumn,’ the girl continued. ‘They need a wedding photographer and if you can make Dad look all cool and brooding, then you can probably make Uncle Tom look like sex god of the year.’
Beth borrowed Anna’s pen and wrote her e-mail address out on a piece of paper. ‘Here. Just ask him to e-mail me.’
Beth watched the girl make her way back over to her father. A new avenue to explore. Maybe even a new career – this time doing something she knew she genuinely enjoyed and was good at. A grin forced itself onto her face.
‘What was that all about?’ said Anna.
‘I think I might have just been approached for my first commission,’ Beth said, still grinning.
‘Cool.’
‘Do you want to take a break? I’ll do the calendar stall for a bit.’
‘Really? Oh brilliant. I’ve been dying to get out there and circulate.’ Anna scanned the room. She gestured, discreetly, to a handsome man by the bar. ‘So I think I’ll start over there.’
Beth laughed. ‘Good luck.’
It was fun standing behind the stall. People came up to her and asked her questions or complimented her about her photography. She accepted the compliments without denying them like she normally would have done. A few of the women came to ask her about the guys in the photos. She politely deflected them saying all she knew was what was on the calendars. Despite her and Anna’s good intentions, the calendar seemed to have acted as a singles ad. She glanced over at Dr April, now deep in conversation with Clarissa, and Dr August, surrounded by a small crowd and clearly loving all the attention. No one seemed to be complaining.
A girl approached, holding a glass of wine. Beth’s heart gave a lurch of recognition. It was Mila, Gordon’s other girlfriend. No. Gordon’s girlfriend. There was no ‘other’ about it now.
Mila examined the calendar, leafing through the sample, and Beth took the opportunity to study her. She was slim and pretty, just like in her picture on the website. Up close, Beth could see she was also petite and had an air of vulnerability about her. Yes. She was Gordon’s type. Beth wondered if she had any suspicions of Gordon’s other life. The one he’d pretended to share with Beth.
‘Would you like to buy a calendar?’ said Beth.
Mila looked up, her eyes big and apologetic. ‘I’d love to, but I don’t think my boyfriend would approve.’
‘Really? Why not?’
Mila looked away. ‘He thinks the men who agreed to do this are all posers.’
Did he now? She wondered what he would have said if he’d managed to smarm her into including him in it. ‘What do you think?’
Mila’s gaze drifted back to the calendars stacked up on the table. She made eye contact for the first time. ‘I think it’s just a bit of fun.’
‘You should buy one then.’
Mila shook her head. ‘Probably not a good idea, no.’ She gave Beth a little smile and ambled off.
Beth stared after her. Mila clearly had no idea about her. Gordon had been lying and cheating on her all this time and now he was doing the same to Mila. She thought about what else Gordon had done and a shiver ran down her spine. She couldn’t let someone else go through that. ‘Wait!’ she shouted. But Mila was already on her way out.
Beth caught the eye of one of the other women from the group and waved her over. ‘Can you take over for a bit,’ she said. ‘I’ll be back in five minutes.’ Weaving through the people in the room, she ran after Mila.
Mila was already half way down the corridor on her way out.
‘Mila!’ Beth shouted. Mila stopped and turned. ‘There’s something I need to tell you.’
‘How do you know my name?’ Mila was looking at her sideways, with suspicion.
‘Doesn’t matter.’ She was out of breath from running. ‘Listen. I need to tell you something. About Gordon.’
‘Gordon?’ Mila’s big eyes widened further. ‘Who are you?’
‘My name’s Beth Tyler. I’m …’ What could she say? Perhaps the truth was easiest. ‘I’m Gordon’s other girlfriend. Or was, anyway.’
‘What?’
‘Until recently, until two weeks ago, I was going out with Gordon. I had no idea about you. Gordon told me he was at swimming training every evening when he wasn’t with me. I was at work so I didn’t think to check.’
‘Look,’ said Mila. ‘If this is some sort of joke, it’s not very funny.’
‘It’s no joke. Honestly. I—’
‘I don’t have to listen to this.’ She turned to go but Beth grabbed her arm.
‘Please. You don’t have to believe me, but please listen to me. I went out with Gordon for a long time until he went to the US. When he came back, we got back together. A few weeks ago. I had no idea about you. He lied to me and manipulated me. He did stuff and then pretended I’d imagined it.’
Mila’s eyes darted around, looking for rescue.
‘He tried to …’ She couldn’t bring herself to mention him suffocating her. It was too weird. Too intimate. ‘I was supposed to go to the department dinner with him two weeks ago and I cancelled. He was so angry he attacked me.’ She was speaking as fast as possible. ‘I’ve reported him to the police. I’ve got a non-molestation order—’
‘Let go of me.’ Mila’s voice was pleading. ‘Please.’ She sounded frightened.
Oh god, Gordon was going to wreck this girl. ‘Mila, Gordon’s a bully. He gets off on intimidating people more vulnerable than he is. He tried to kill me. And then he tried to make out I was getting paranoid. I thought I was going crazy. He—’
Mila prised Beth’s fingers off her arm and turned and fled. Beth didn’t follow her. As Mila pushed through the door, Beth saw her look over her shoulder at her. Then she was gone.
Mila had been frightened by her. She probably thought Beth was some sort of nutter. But at least she’d tried to warn her. And if Mila ever got to the point where she doubted her own sanity, she might now consider that there was another explanation.
Footsteps came down the corridor. Beth tensed and turned, half expecting to see Gordon.
It was Hibs. He put a hand on Beth’s shoulder. ‘I heard. Well done.’
‘She’s going to tell Gordon,’ said Beth.
‘You never know. She might have recognised enough in what you said to keep it to herself.’
‘I tried,’ said Beth.
‘I know.’ Hibs gave h
er a hug. ‘Well done, Tyler. I’m proud of you.’
Beth smiled into his shoulder. ‘Thanks. I’m proud of me too.’
‘Do you feel up to going back in?’
‘Yes.’ They turned and walked side by side down the corridor. As they reached the door, he took her hand.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Beth lay in a warm post-coital glow, her head on Hibs’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. The past few weeks had been a rollercoaster. Now, suddenly, she was more in charge of her work and the rest of her world. She still found it hard to believe that she’d stood up to Gordon. She knew that the catalyst for all this change was the man who was currently tracing patterns on her shoulder with his finger.
She lifted her head to look at him. He smiled at her. ‘Hello.’
‘Hibs, I’ve decided that I don’t want to stay in academia. I’ve made an appointment to see a careers advisor.’
He stared at her, his face serious. The finger on her shoulder stopped moving. He didn’t say anything.
‘I’m going to finish my PhD first,’ she added.
He nodded, but still didn’t reply. She rested her chin on his chest. ‘Say something.’
Hibs looked away for a moment before he looked back into her eyes. ‘I’m just thinking that if having sex leads to this kind of announcement, you and I should never sleep together ever again.’
She poked him in the side. ‘Be serious. What do you think?’
‘Is it what you want to do?’
‘Yes.’
‘In that case, go for it.’ He reached across and stroked her cheek. ‘I’ll support you in whatever way I can.’
She laid her head back on his chest and let the feeling of contentment wrap around her. ‘Where have you been all my life, Dr Hibbotson?’
‘Right here,’ he said. ‘Just waiting for you to notice me.’
Somehow, it was the most perfect thing he could have said.
About the Author
Rhoda Baxter writes contemporary romantic comedies. She has lived all over the world, including the Pacific island of Yap, Nigeria, Sri Lanka and Didcot. She now lives in East Yorkshire with one husband, two children and no pets or carnivorous plants.