Pride? He hadn’t thought about that particular emotion yet; he was still reeling from finding out he was going to be a father. What kind of father was he going to be? Distant, like his father had been and continued to be? No. There was no way he’d have a part of him out there in the world and not want to watch it grow up, be involved somehow.
‘Sounds like neither of us exactly has a blueprint for happy families,’ he said, choosing not to embellish that with his own sorry familial experiences. ‘Which makes getting things right so important. I’m guessing your father doesn’t know about the baby?’
‘What? No! Not yet. He’s had enough to deal with, with a brain tumour and surgery later in the month. And now...well he’s very sick. I have to wait.’
‘You are going to tell him, though? And Dom? You can’t just get bigger—’
She laughed. ‘Don’t panic, Captain Sensible. I am going to tell them, of course. But you and I need a plan first. I’m assuming you’d want parental rights?’
‘Ah, you make it sound so affirming and fluffy.’ He bit back irritation, still astounded that two hours ago he’d been totally oblivious that his world was about to be tipped upside down. ‘Yes, Giada. I want to be involved in my child’s life.’ Whatever happened, he would try to be a better father than the one he’d had.
‘How? How’s that going to work? I mean...’ She bit her lip, frowning as if this was a very hard puzzle. ‘What are your...um, intentions?’
‘I don’t understand.’ What was she asking? ‘Are you expecting...? Do we need to get married, is that what you want?’
‘What? Really?’ She blinked and then, surprisingly, laughed. ‘Lucas Beaufort, is this a proposal?’
‘Yes. Um. No. Not exactly.’ He wasn’t at all sure how he’d feel if she said yes.
‘Good, because it needs work. No. No, Lucas. I don’t need to marry you.’ She flicked her hand towards him. ‘This isn’t the Dark Ages. I am perfectly capable and financially secure enough to look after this baby on my own. And by the sound of it you hate the thought of it...’
He did. At least, he had. Now, he wasn’t so sure. And, hell, even though he’d had no intention of proposing or marrying her, the rejection stung.
‘It’s okay. We don’t need make any decisions yet; we have plenty of time to figure this out. You need to sleep. We can chat more tomorrow.’
‘Ah. About that...’ She pressed her lips together and looked down at her good hand. ‘The thing is... I’m going home tomorrow.’
‘What? You’ve only just got here.’
‘Someone from the family needs to be in Isola Verde. I’ve phoned my private secretary and she’s arranged for a flight...scheduled, unfortunately, but it’s all we can do at such short notice.’
‘Wait. You’ve done what?’ What the actual hell? He fought to keep his shock under control. Oh, she was full of surprises, Giada Baresi. ‘You just went ahead and arranged that without talking to me or Dom? What about...?’ He’d been going to say ‘us’, but there wasn’t any ‘us’. It was Princess Giada and Lucas Beaufort. Two separate people brought together by lust and now forced to be connected for the rest of their lives. ‘Is this how it’s going to be? You making all the decisions and informing me of them, and I get no say?’ He couldn’t live like that. ‘Damn it, Giada. I don’t want control, but I do deserve an equal say in things.’
‘My nation needs someone from the Royal family at home. Particularly when news breaks about Papa’s accident. Dom can’t go, can he? He’s got to be here with our father and do his job. So it has to be me. Unfortunately, you are having a child with a princess and I have duties to perform whether you—or I—like it or not.’
She sat up and he saw the regal jaw, the tilt of her chin, the resolution in her eyes. He reminded himself that this was the indomitable and independent Princess Giada Baresi who had grown up with all the trappings of wealth, privilege and responsibility despite the occasional tongue lashing from her father, not soft, sweet Gigi who’d giggled against his naked chest and had sighed his name when she’d come.
‘I am leaving tomorrow, Lucas. I have duties I have to attend to at home.’ She paused. Thought for a moment. There was a tease in her eyes as she said, ‘Is that okay with you?’
Well, at least she was listening.
‘What would have been nicer would have been a conversation that went along the lines of...“Hey, I’m thinking I should go home. There isn’t anyone else available and I think I need to be there to give some stability to the nation while the King and Crown Prince are out of the country. What do you think, Lucas?”’
‘To which I could have answered, “Sure thing. That sounds like a great plan. How can I help you? Remember, you only have one active hand so you’ll need extra support.”’ He paused to check his tone had been supportive rather than critical. ‘And you could have said, “I’ll be okay, Lucas, because I have people to help me, but thank you for offering.”’
But even though he’d hoped she’d receive his comments well, her eyebrows rose and she looked stunned. ‘You want me to ask permission before I do anything? Dio, you’re like my papa!’
‘I do not want you to ask for permission, I’d just like us to have a conversation. I’d like us to work together with this...new issue.’ He looked at her, saw the confusion and, yes, anger, clouding her eyes and he knew he was stepping over the line here. ‘You may well be a princess but, damn, in this house we’re just a man and a woman trying to make a future that will work for us both.’
‘I am always a princess, Lucas. That is something I cannot change.’
‘You have changed, Giada.’
‘You said that to me once before, Lucas, remember?’ She bristled, her back straightening, her mouth flattening into a tight line. ‘Only last time you said it with admiration and respect and now it just sounds bitter.’
‘I’m not bitter, I’m blindsided. I’m trying to work out what we do next but you’re always one step ahead of me, making your own decisions. I’m always playing catch-up. I just need a moment or two where we can talk civilly to each other.’ Which was laughable because he wasn’t sure how civil he could be when he wanted to kiss her again and again. She was volatile and aristocratic, fiery and unbending, but, hell, she was also sexy and surprising and beautiful.
Which, if he was honest, wasn’t helping him keep his head clear and logical.
She sighed. ‘Then come with me. We can talk on the plane. We can talk at the palace.’
‘What? Just drop everything and travel across the world? Duck out of my job at a moment’s notice? It’s not that easy to leave my colleagues one member of staff down. Plus, there’s an important charity event in a couple of weeks that I have to attend.’
‘More chilli eating?’ She threw at him with a look of scorn.
‘A ball to raise money to add a new wing to the children’s cancer ward at Seattle General. It’s important. I have a life here, Giada. I have things to do, roster commitments...’ He wasn’t sure if she even knew what that meant. ‘You have your own hospital project so you must know adequate staffing levels are always an issue. Never mind leaving Dom here to cope with your family’s problems on his own.’
‘He has Logan and all his ER staff around him. He can visit Papa’s bedside and talk to him. Wish him better. When our father wakes up they will need time together without me being there. Papa’s always better if I’m not around. And, besides, Dom’s been coping without us...’ she blinked and Lucas just knew she meant without me ‘...for long enough. I came here to tell you about the baby and that job is done. I need to go home.’
‘And what am I supposed to do?’ Follow her? Step back? If he did that he wasn’t sure how involved he’d be in his child’s life. He needed to make a stand now, from the beginning. Wow. His life had gone from busy yet simple to crowded and complicated in the blink of an eye. ‘I understand you need to go
home. Is there any way I can convince you to stay just a little bit longer so we can talk things through?’
‘I have to go. I’m sorry, Lucas. I am needed. I have to be the voice of the family. You could come along later. When you have time?’
As far as he’d been concerned it would never be the right time to be a father, but he was faced with an impossible choice. Leave his job here, if only for a few days, or risk losing the first chance to make plans for a good life for his child. Time was the one thing he’d been deprived of with his own family and it was his biggest regret.
He looked at Giada. Her hair was a mess of crazy waves that stuck out at odd angles from where she’d lain on it. Her eyes were bruised with exhaustion. The slash of red across her sternum from the seatbelt was changing to purple and yellow and must hurt like hell every time she moved. Her arm was damaged and no doubt causing her a lot of pain. She needed to take some time to rest and heal but she was determined to do the right thing by the people who needed her.
She’d faced so much on her own over the years, having been left in Isola Verde without her mother or brother on side, and had risen above the hurt she’d felt from her father’s criticisms. Now she was facing a royal crisis and a pregnancy that was possibly not going to be well received. And still she was determined to overcome it all, on her own.
Well, he wasn’t going to let that happen.
Besides, he needed to put this child first and they needed to talk more. ‘Okay. I’ll make some calls and pack a bag.’
When he’d woken up this morning he’d been expecting a busy day in the ER. Not a seismic shift in his world and a sudden trip across the globe.
But if Giada Baresi was going to Isola Verde then he was going too.
CHAPTER FOUR
HE WAS IN the next room.
Was he thinking about all this the same way she was? Was his head whirling with possibilities and yet roadblocks too? What was going to happen to them all?
Was he thinking about her? About their child?
From her bed she’d heard his murmured voice in the room down the corridor as he’d talked on the phone, then she’d heard bumps and thuds. Lifting down a suitcase? And then nothing. For hours. He was probably sleeping like she should have been, but ever since her head had hit the pillow her mind had been full again, reliving the accident. Recoiling from Lucas’s initial reaction to her news. His face when he’d seen their baby on the monitor.
Lucas. The only man who’d intrigued her because he’d initially rebuffed her and who hadn’t been blinded by her title and riches. The only man who’d ever proposed so reluctantly it had almost made her laugh—and, yes, she had a few proposals under her belt. She almost wished she could rewind it to let him hear his tone: I’m asking you to marry me, but please don’t say yes.
She imagined him lying on his side, dressed in his usual bed wear of...nothing. And then, just as it had so many, many times before, her mind filled with images of him. The way his eyes misted as he kissed her. The way his jaw set as he cried out her name as they climaxed together. The water droplets on his eyelashes in the sea, in the shower, in the pool. His laugh.
She’d dug deep enough to uncover the man she thought was the real Lucas Beaufort. A smiling, laughing man who was generous and funny and considerate. Who hadn’t treated her as if she was in a glass cage, hadn’t had any agenda but to enjoy her and to give her enjoyment. She couldn’t remember the last man who’d been interested in her and not just her title. Oh, and he was as sexy as hell.
Her body tingled with a keen low ache, hot and needy, to be with him again.
Was he thinking about her the way she was thinking about him? Did he want her the way her body longed for his?
Was he thinking about her naked? About that weekend when they’d taken and given so much, exploring each other, tasting.
She could taste him now.
Stupido. He’d made it clear he was coming to Isola Verde because he had to, not because he wanted to. So lying here all hot and turned on wasn’t going to help her one tiny bit.
Time to get real. It was okay, she could weather this storm on her own the way she’d weathered all the others. She didn’t need anyone. She could cope perfectly well on her own. And, yes, single parenting would be hard but compared to most solo mothers she was in a far better position—or she would be once she’d explained it all to her family.
There was the sticking point. Her courage wobbled.
Giada sat up, checked her phone. A text from Dom saying their father was out of surgery and being kept in a coma but responding well. Stable.
That was good. And a lot more than she felt right now.
* * *
The airport staff couldn’t do enough for her...a first-class customer who’d insisted on anonymity and got it. And somehow they’d wrangled Lucas to be upgraded to first class too, so they could sit together for twelve hours. They could talk then. He still wasn’t sure what he was going to say.
He’d had to help reinstate the sling this morning, if only to remind her not to use her sore wrist. The bruising across her chest had bloomed overnight and she was walking as if every step caused her pain, but she didn’t ask for help and didn’t complain. Not once.
The first-class lounge was next level. Sure, Lucas flew business class when he could, but this was something else with its glittering chandeliers and hushed-voice staff.
Finally, after an early start where they’d only managed rudimentary conversation in the cab that had brought them to the airport, they were alone and able to chat. Giada smiled warily as soon as the lounge waitress finished serving them a hot breakfast of scrambled eggs and salad.
‘Lucas, I know this is difficult for you, but thank you for taking time off. Did Dom ask any difficult questions when you called him? I’m hoping you didn’t mention our news?’
‘I didn’t call Dom. He’s the head of the ER, sure, but I need to clear any leave with HR. I had time owing. Hell, we all have time owing. God knows what would happen if we all decided to take it together. I said I knew Dom was busy and asked them to pass on my apologies to him and told them I needed to take time off immediately for personal and family reasons.’
He laughed at the irony of that and wondered what conclusion Dom would come to. He only hoped his best friend was too distracted by work and his sick father to put two and two together about his sister and colleague going AWOL on the same day. ‘I don’t feel great about not keeping him in the loop.’
If this had just been about him he’d have fronted up to his friend and explained, but it wasn’t just about him, and his life wouldn’t just be about him ever again.
‘He’ll understand, eventually.’
‘Somehow I doubt that.’ He’d left Dom in the lurch and short-staffed, instead of being there for his friend at a very difficult and stressful time. He’d need to do a lot of grovelling when he finally saw his mate face to face again. Swallowing his guilt, Lucas watched as Giada tried to eat her breakfast one-handed, stabbing at it unenthusiastically. ‘You need to eat more than that.’
‘I’m really not hungry.’ With her fork in her left hand she rolled a halved cherry tomato across a slick of pesto sauce. ‘One thing I’ve learnt is that morning sickness doesn’t just happen in the morning, and even though the books say it should stop around twelve weeks, it doesn’t.’
God, he hadn’t even thought about that. Her body was undergoing changes and she was dealing with all that plus the accident, and now shouldering responsibility for her nation’s welfare. ‘Let me cut it up for you.’
Her eyes met his, her tone sharp. ‘I can manage.’
So they were back to awkward conversation again. Great. His morning wasn’t going well.
Luckily, they were interrupted by a staff member. ‘Excuse me, Your Highness, they’re calling your flight now. Time to go to the gate.’
Your Highness
. Too often he forgot that. To him she was Gigi, but to everyone else in the world she was on a pedestal, out of reach, to be observed and commented on. He was utterly out of his depth here.
‘Okay. Thank you—Oh. My phone’s ringing.’ Giada stood up but paused, her eyes panic-stricken as she looked at the screen. ‘It’s Dom. We don’t have time, but what if there’s news?’
‘Take it. They’ll wait for their VIP passengers.’ And, wow, that felt strange. Their lives were so completely different and he’d have to straddle it all.
He picked up her carry-on luggage and watched as she spoke to her brother, telling him she was going home, apologising for the abruptness of it and for not warning him of their visit in the first place. Clearly Dom was surprised at this sudden turnabout and it didn’t start out as a positive conversation, but she did a fair amount of pacifying and explaining. Someone needed to be in Isola Verde and she was the only real choice, but as they chatted the initial tension across her shoulders eventually eased until she finished off with, ‘I miss you, too.’ She didn’t mention Lucas.
Finally, she flicked her phone off as another call for their flight was issued, and sighed. ‘Papa’s still stable. Still in a coma. No change. Which I guess is good news.’
‘Absolutely.’ He took her arm.
‘One thing...they had to operate on his brain overnight. What does “intracranial pressure is under control” mean?’ Worry lines etched her face, making her look beautiful but vulnerable, and his heart shifted to make space for this woman who was trying to be everything to everyone.
‘It means they’re monitoring the pressure in his brain. Often it rises if there’s an injury and the brain swells, or if there’s bleeding or a tumour.’
‘He has a tumour already, so a bleed could make things so much worse, right?’
‘Max Granger operated as soon as he arrived yesterday to release the pressure so I’d say he’s in very good hands, Giada.’
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