by Jon Fosse
Asle! Brita shouts
and she hears that Brita’s scream fills everything there is, the fjord, the mountain, and Asle doesn’t answer, and then a big wave comes and washes over Asle and capsizes his boat and then it’s lying there and tossing in the water and bumping against Brita and then she can’t see Asle’s head anymore and Brita grabs hold of his hair and she holds it tight and the waves hit them and Brita’s free hand hits the fjord and hits and hits and a big wave carries Brita and Asle in toward shore and then Brita is standing up a little on the underwater slope there and a wave crashes over her head and she walks heavily in onto the shore and pulls Asle with her by the hair and only his head is above water and then Brita comes more and more out of the water and her hair is hanging long and black down over her face, and then Asle’s upper body is above water, and Brita pulls Asle toward her and she puts one arm under his knee and the other behind his back, and Brita picks Asle up and with her face turned toward the rain Brita wades in onto the shore with Asle in her arms and his hands hang straight down and Brita reaches the shore and with Asle in her arms Brita starts to go up to the boathouse and she sees that Brita with Asle in her arms goes around the corner of the boathouse and then she sees Asle’s boat lying there floating so pretty in the water and she sees Asle standing there holding a stick and there is a thin line going from the stick to his boat and Asle walks along the shore and he pulls the boat carefully along with the stick and the boat is so shining and it moves so gently over the water and then he stops pulling on the stick and lets the boat glide along and then his boat is lying there and rising and falling up and down in the fjord and then Asle raises the stick and the boat makes a slow curve and then the boat glides in toward the shore and then Asle walks backward a little and then he guides the boat into a kind of cove he has made between two big stones and then he puts down the stick and then Asle starts to put mussel shells into the boat, one blue mussel shell after another, and fills up the whole boat, and then Asle gives the boat a little shove and it moves out from his bay between the two stones, and then he takes the stick and he starts to walk farther along the shore and the boat slides so slowly and steadily along and the blazing motionless water comes almost up to the edge of the boat and Asle guides the boat calmly along and then Asle turns around and he sees Kristoffer come into view around the corner of the boathouse
So, Asle, what kind of cargo are you carrying today, Kristoffer says
I’m taking my shipment to Bergen, Asle says
What kind of shipment, Kristoffer says
Different things, Asle says
You don’t want to tell, Kristoffer says
Mm no, Asle says
and Kristoffer says that’s all right, confidential trade secrets, everyone needs a few of those, he says and he asks if he’ll be staying a long time in Bergen
A few days, Asle says
Yes well once you’ve sailed to the city, why not, Kristoffer says
The trip takes a whole day, it, yes it does, Asle says
That’s true, Kristoffer says
and Kristoffer walks out onto the pier and he starts to pull his boat in toward him
Are you going out in the boat, Asle says
I’m going to do a little fishing, we need food after all, Kristoffer says
Can I go with you, Asle says
Sure you can, Kristoffer says
No never mind, Asle says
I don’t have time for that, he says
Yes I can certainly understand that, Kristoffer says
You have a full cargo and you were on your way to Bergen, weren’t you, he says
I’ll go with you later, another time, Asle says
Yes, you’re sailing to Bergen, aren’t you now, Kristoffer says
Yes I am, Asle says
and then Kristoffer’s boat comes up to the pier, and Kristoffer climbs on board, unties the mooring lines, sits down on the seat, puts the oars in the water, and rows a little way out into the bay, then he stops there and rests on his oars
Talk to you later, when you get back from Bergen, Kristoffer says
OK, Asle says
And you’ll bring back some treats with you, right, Kristoffer says
I can probably do that, Asle says
and then Kristoffer puts the oars down into the water and rows out into the fjord and Asle goes farther along the shore and his boat moves so prettily along and Kristoffer rows with strong strokes and his boat disappears back behind the headland and then the water ripples and some little waves make Asle’s boat roll from side to side and Asle lifts up the stick, and the front of the boat is hanging in the air above the water, and the back of the boat is down in the water, and then the mussel shells slide back out of the boat and fall into the water and Asle pulls hard on the stick and then the line comes loose from the fitting on the boat and then his boat stays lying there and drifting without a mooring line and Asle tries to reach it with the stick and just barely does it, he reaches the boat and he carefully tries to make it come closer to shore, he pushes lightly against it with the stick, and then he slips and the boat shoots off to the side out into the fjord and Asle puts down the stick, finds himself a stone, throws it, and the stone hits the water right in front of the boat and the waves from the stone push the boat farther from land and Asle finds himself another stone and he throws it and this time it hits the outside of the boat and it comes closer to shore again and Asle picks up the stick, gets hold of the boat with it, and he guides the boat in onto the shore. And Asle picks up the boat. And Asle stands there with the boat in his hands and looks at it and then he puts the boat down in the fjord again, and then the boat is lying there in the bay between the two stones and Asle finds some twigs, breaks some pieces off an old plank of wood that’s lying there, loads the boat up well, and then Asle takes the boat in his hands and then he pushes it out a ways and the boat glides out so prettily and Asle finds a little stone, throws it behind the boat, and the boat is pushed farther out by the waves the stone makes, it bobs up and down, bobs up, bobs down, and then Asle finds a bunch of stones and he throws them one after another behind the boat and it glides farther and farther out onto the fjord and soon the boat is a long way out in the bay and it glides slowly farther out onto the fjord and Asle finds a big and very heavy stone, he takes the stone in his hands and he manages to pick it up and he carries the stone down to the edge of the water and he takes the stone in one hand and tries to lift it up behind his head, but he can’t do it, and he holds the stone with both hands and holds it as far out to one side as he can and he throws it and the stone splashes into the water just a little ways out and the stone makes big waves that splash water both in onto him and out onto the boat and the boat shoots out onto the bay and Asle sees the boat glide farther and farther out onto the fjord and then it’s as if the weather has suddenly changed, it gets dark, the wind starts to blow, it rains, the waves come in and the boat bobs up and down and goes farther and farther out onto the fjord and then Asle kicks off his wooden shoes and he unbuttons his pants and pulls them off and then he walks out into the water, he is standing in water up to his knees, and then a wave comes almost up to his waist and there far away out there is his boat and he looks at the boat and she sees, standing there on the shore, Asle wade out and she sees him disappear under the water and she thinks that now he really does need to come back soon and she goes out onto the pier and it’s so dark that she can’t see anything, and now he has to come soon, she thinks, and then this wind, and this darkness, and the waves, the high tide, and it’s so cold, and the water is so rough that the waves are crashing over the pier all the way up to her, it’s horrible weather, she thinks, and now he really does need to come back soon, she thinks, and out there? isn’t that something like a light out there? like firelight, out in the middle of the fjord there? and doesn’t it look purple? no there can’t be anything like that out there, but still, she thinks, and where is he? and his boat? she can’t see anything, but where is he? and why doesn�
�t he come back? doesn’t he want to be with her? is that why? and to think that anyone would want to be out on the fjord in weather like this, and in this darkness, no she just doesn’t understand, she thinks and she tries to see out across the fjord, but she can’t see anything, and now he really does have to come soon, she thinks, he really can’t stay out on the fjord in weather like this, in darkness like this, in this weather, and in that little boat, a little rowboat, she thinks. And then this darkness. And it’s so cold. And can she just stand here? But why doesn’t he come? And can she even remember him ever being out in weather like this before, and so late in the evening? she thinks, no, nothing comes to mind, well, or maybe he has? no she doesn’t believe he has, he probably never has, she thinks, and now she can’t just stand here like this, she thinks, because she’s freezing, it’s cold, and can she call his name? no she can’t, she probably can’t just call his name? that wouldn’t work to stand here in the darkness and call his name, she thinks, but what should she do? someone has to look for him! yes! someone has to find him! but who? she has to go get someone with a big boat with a good light to row out onto the fjord and find him, she thinks, but who? does she know anyone? no she really doesn’t know anyone who could do that, she thinks, so she just has to stand here, stay standing here, she really has to just stay standing here waiting, she thinks, and what else? call his name? find someone with a big boat? a big boat with a light? or just wait? stand here and wait? or go home and wait? just go back home and wait? because she can’t stay here, and she’s sure he’s coming home soon, he’s probably just out a little late, she thinks and she walks back in along the pier and she stops, because there, there far away on the shore, there’s a fire burning, and can it be a Midsummer’s Day fire? and aren’t those two boys standing there around the fire? yes, she’s sure of it, yes, and they’re not the boys from the neighboring farm, are they? she thinks, yes it must be the two neighbor boys, but a fire? and now, at this time of year? in this weather? no it can’t be, she thinks, no one would build a fire in this weather, no, no one could probably even start a fire on an evening like this, but there it is, a fire is burning on the shore and two boys around ten or twelve years old are standing and looking at the fire and isn’t that something like a boat, a rowboat, that’s burning? isn’t that a boat just like the one he had? she thinks, no, that’s strange, she thinks and she looks at the flames rising up from the boat, they’ve set fire to the boat in different places and the fire has the shape of a boat and then they’re standing around it these two boys and they’re staring into the flames, and what is this? she thinks, no she doesn’t understand, it can’t be, she thinks and she can’t stay standing here on the pier, because it’s cold, and she’s freezing, and this rain, this wind, but he, he’s not coming soon? what’s happened to him? she thinks and she starts to walk back in along the pier again, and then there’s that strange fire, she thinks, a boat burning far away down on the shore, and two boys standing and looking and looking at the burning boat, no really what is this? she thinks, and now, at this time of year, why? she thinks and she goes around the corner of the boathouse and she walks up the path and now the rain and the wind have gotten stronger and the darkness is so dense and thick now that she can’t see her own feet, and now she has to get indoors, get into the house, she thinks, now she has to go back to the old house where they live and tend the fire, because it can’t go out in the stove, when he comes back from the fjord wet and icy it has to be warm in the house, at home in the old house, in the fine old room at home in the old house, where they live, where they’ve lived for years and years now, she thinks, now she has to get home, and has to make sure there’s a lot of wood in the stove, she thinks and she walks up the little road and she stops and she turns around, because didn’t she hear something behind her? footsteps? she heard something, she thinks and she looks down at the shore and a fire is still burning there, but it’s not as big as before, now the fire is like there were only a few planks of wood burning, and it burns weakly, and that a fire should be burning down there on the shore now, in the dark evening, in this rain, in this wind, she thinks and she looks at the fire going out, and everything becomes dark and then a single flame flares up, then everything turns back into darkness, then a single flame flares up again, but now it’s smaller, and then everything turns back into darkness and then a single flame flares up one more time but it’s so small that it can only barely be seen, and then it’s dark. Just dark. Just the rain. And just the wind. And now she really does need to get indoors, she thinks and she goes around the corner of the old house where they live and there in front of her in the yard she sees an old woman walking in a blue coat, and on her head she has on the yellow-white cap that he always wears, and the old woman supports herself with a walking stick, and she walks slowly forward and in one hand she’s holding a red shopping bag, and then she sees that there’s a little boy walking along with the old woman and he is holding one handle of the shopping bag too, and now she sees it, because it’s him as a boy! it’s him walking there, she thinks and she sees that the old woman has put two crooked fingers on his little hand and the old woman and he go up to the front step and she leans the walking stick against the wall and opens the front door
So now we better go in the house, let’s go in, Asle and Grandma, Grandma says
Yes let’s go in, Asle says
You were such a good boy Asle to help Grandma so much with her bag, Grandma says
After Grandpa Olaf died, you’ve been my biggest help, she says
and she sees Grandma go in the front door and he goes in after her and she thinks that no, she can’t just stay standing out here in the cold even if someone else has just gone into her house, home into the old house, because it is her house after all, it’s she and he who live there, she thinks, and besides it was definitely him who went inside just now, and the old woman, that was his Grandma, she thinks, so then, so, then maybe she can still just go in? she thinks, and she really does need to just go inside, she too, because it’s windy and raining too much for her to be able to stay standing here outside, this wind, this rain, and this cold, she needs to get indoors too, she thinks, but can she really go home into the old house when someone else lives there? she thinks, but really it’s she who lives there, they who live there, she and he, Signe and Asle, so she just has to go in, she thinks and she goes in and there in the hall she sees Grandma stand and take off her yellow-white hat and she puts it on the shelf and then Grandma unbuttons her coat and she takes it off and hangs it on a peg