by Payne, Jenna
I’m standing in front of one of the largest glass buildings I have ever seen. I can’t help but feel remarkably small next to it. Smaller even than I usually do, and that’s saying something.
“It’s just a job,” I tell myself. “I know the boss. My brother works here, it’ll be fine.”
Still, that tiny voice that’s been in my head ever since I remember, the voice that whispers, ‘you’re going to fail’ over and over and over again won’t shut up. I guess I’ll just have to ignore it as best I can.
I stand up straight, square my shoulders and walk upright through the tall, crystal clear front doors and into a long, echoing hallway. I look around, through a maze of people rushing in and out before I spot him standing right beside the receptionist’s desk.
“There she is!” my brother’s booming voice rings out. He is as tall and large as I am short and skinny. He still wears flannel shirts and sports a five o’clock shadow, despite being a very well-paid designer for one of the largest consulting firms in the country.
Glad, at last, to see a familiar face in the bustle of the unfamiliar city, I rush towards him.
“Gabe! Thanks so much for being here!” I say wrapping my arms around him.
He presses me to him and picks me up in a large bear hug the way he’s done since I was about six years old.
“I thought you were supposed to be off today with Emma,” I say referring to my sister-in-law. She’s currently seven months pregnant with my very first niece.
“Emma agreed to reschedule the couple’s doctor visit,” Gabe tells me. “I couldn’t miss my little sister’s first day.”
“I wouldn’t miss it either,” a voice to Gabe’s right says. “With Evie around this place’ll definitely get a lot more interesting.”
I turn from my brother to find a smart-looking young man with floppy, light brown hair, bright green eyes and a sharp blue suit smiling down at me.
“Alex!” I say rushing over to him, “How are you?”
He continues to smile as he opens his arms and gives me a quick, somewhat awkward hug. We pull back and I blush. He smells just as nice as he did almost two years ago. That was the last time I saw him.
“I’ve been keeping myself busy,” Alex answers. “Your genius brother is designing bestselling software left and right. It’s hard for us to keep track.”
“Well, I wouldn’t have a job if it weren’t for Alex,” Gabe says. “So, I figure I owe him as much as I can dish out.”
“That goes for two of us,” I say turning to Alex. “I know I said this on the phone but, thanks again, so much for giving me this position.”
I can’t be sure, but I think I see a hint of color come into Alex’s cheeks and he gives me the shiest smile I’ve yet seen from him.
“You’re my best friend’s little sister,” he answers. “It’s the least I could do. You look great, by the way!”
He gazes appreciatively up and down my relatively new body. I proudly throw my shoulders back, glad that he’s noticed.
“I lost a lot of weight since you last saw me,” I say.
“You also did quite a bit of growing up,” he says and, though he tries to hide it, his gaze shifts very slightly to my breasts which have grown significantly larger than they were when I was a teenager.
“Hey, I’m not sure I like where this is going,” my brother cuts in. Though, the good-natured smile is still on his face. “I’d rather you not ogle my little sister in front of me.”
I giggle, but Alex definitely blushes at this and turns away. He clears his throat before turning back to us.
“Well,” he says, “I guess we should show you around, Evie.”
“Sounds good,” I say and follow Gabe and Alex down the hall and through another large set of glass doors.
The company, Dregfield & Mosoti looks a lot like your typical ‘Google’ type tech outfit. Open floor plan. People bobbing up and down at their desks on Swiss balls.
During the tour, I remain mostly silent, all the while keeping my eyes on Alex.
Alex has always been the one guy I fantasized about. He was Gabe’s best friend through high school and my very first crush. I was only twelve at the time but, I still remember the first time I saw him.
Gabe had invited him over for dinner.
Alex walked in, looking effortlessly handsome with his sleek brown hair and tight-fitting jeans. I became extremely aware of my stringy brown hair, overlarge stomach and flat chest.
Through the rest of my adolescence, I kept admiring Alex from afar. He, on the other hand, seemed to have adopted me as a sort of little sister substitute. Usually, he treated me just the way that Gabe did. With brotherly affection.
I thought that was all I would ever be to Alex.
But, this morning, when he met me in the lobby and looked me up and down while red colored his cheeks, I began to think, for the first time, that Alex might, finally, see me as a woman.
“This is where you’ll be, Evie,” Alex says, leading me and Gabe through another set of large glass doors.
Alex stops at a large, black desk with one phone and a large desktop computer.
“This is your desk,” Alex says, “you’re really going to be a kind of gatekeeper for me and my partner, Simon. He should be in any time now. But, he’s usually late.”
I notice for the first time, an unpleasant frown line Alex’s face. Clearly he’s not entirely pleased with his partner and I can’t help but wonder why that is. Almost as much as I wonder if I’ll ever see his adorably shy blush again.
“So, I guess this is where the tour ends?” I ask with a bit of a flirtatious lilt to my voice. Secretly, I’m hoping to see Alex’s cheeks color again.
“We do have to get to work sometimes,” he says with a smile at me before looking over to Gabe. “That includes you, Gabe.”
“Fine,” Gabe answers. “I guess I can trust you to take care of my baby sister.”
Gabe reaches out and ruffles my hair. I feel annoyingly small under his hand. Like I’m twelve years old again and much too young for Alex to notice me.
“Gabe!” I say, ducking from underneath his hand, “I’m twenty-three. I think I’m capable of taking care of myself.”
“Either way,” Alex says, clearly wanting to avoid some sort of brother vs. sister confrontation, “I’m glad you’re here. Simon and I have been looking for an assistant for a while. It’s good that you became available when you did.”
Gabe says goodbye to me and Alex and returns to his design studio.
“Here,” Alex says once Gabe has disappeared through the glass doors, “I’ll show you what you’ll be doing. It’s pretty straightforward,” he says, “nothing you can’t handle.”
He moves behind my desk to bring up what he calls the ‘scheduling system’ when the door to the office opens and a tall figure strides in.
“‘Morning Alex,” the man says in a deep, sensuous voice. “I see you’ve found an assistant for us.”
I look up and, for the first time, I’m met with Simon Mosoti’s captivating gaze.
His hazel, almond-shaped eyes dance as they smile down at me. I’m caught almost equally by his dark hair elegantly lined with silver and his small, bow-like lips.
I know he’s quite a bit older than me. Almost fifteen years if Gabe’s account is to be believed. Despite this, I feel heat rush to my cheeks when he smiles at me and gives me a suggestive wink.
“Simon, this is Evie,” Alex says. As he does I feel Alex move closer to me and put an almost protective arm around my shoulder. I chance to glance at his face as he does so. He is smiling, but I can see a protective, almost jealous glint in his eye.
This makes my face color even more.
“She’s Gabe’s sister,” Alex continues before turning to me, “Evie, this is Simon Mosoti. My partner.”
“Nice to meet you,” I say shyly, holding out my hand. Simon laughs good-naturedly.
“No need to be nervous, Evie,” he says. “No matter what that brother
of yours might have told you, I promise I don’t bite.”
I look up at him and smile as he holds my hand in his. I barely notice that he’s been holding on to my hand for quite a bit longer than any other men have ever done when it comes to handshakes.
He looks into my eyes, his own still dancing brightly, and I can feel my pulse begin to jump in my wrist.
“Well, Evie and I should really get back to training,” Alex says quickly, moving his arm around me once again in order to pull me away from Simon.
Simon steps back and drops my hand. I feel my heart sink at the loss of contact before I realize that Alex’s equally warm hand is still curled around my shoulder. My pulse, once again begins pounding, this time reaching my ears.
“Well,” Simon says, “I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other, Evie.”
And, with another wink, Simon saunters back into his office and out of sight. Almost as soon as the door closes behind Simon, Alex’s hand falls from my shoulder.
“He seems nice,” I say to Alex. My heart definitely sinking now at the loss of contact from Simon.
“Yeah, he’s okay,” Alex says, leading me back to the computer chair and bringing up the scheduling application he’d started to show me when Simon arrived.
“But, he’s a bit of a ladies’ man,” Alex continues. “Kind of a playboy. So...just be careful.”
I nod to Alex but, all the same, can’t help but feel a rush of excitement spread over me, even at this news. I’ve never been a playboy’s object of affection before.
Men like that usually steer clear of innocent, conservative-looking girls like me. The idea that this man, Simon, has openly flirted with me and, what’s more, made Alex jealous by doing so is an enticing prospect.
And I find that I can’t stop thinking about what will happen when Simon and I meet again.
*****
Simon and I meet again. And again and again over the past two weeks. It seems every day, he finds some reason to keep me for extended periods in his office.
It’s almost always banal work. Taking memos for other employees or filing reports for him. I’ve come to the conclusion that he mostly uses it as an excuse to talk to me.
He’s always asking about how I’m getting along in my new job, what it was like knowing Alex when he was a teenager, what my hobbies are, what I studied in school, things like that.
I answer as honestly as I can and try my best not to sound either too chatty or too cold. I’ve honestly never been in a position wherein I am physically attracted to my boss and I’ve never been very good at flirting either. I suppose it’s an insecurity that comes from years of being less than beautiful.
Once I did finally grow into my looks and become slim in college, I had no idea what to do with myself. Fortunately, Simon does not have this problem.
Indeed, he often brazenly flirts with me.
It’s been nothing too obscene so far. Just little things like telling me how pretty I look in a dress I’m wearing, or how nice it is to walk in and see my lovely face in the morning. Once he asked me if I had a boyfriend.
“No,” I answered, “I’m taking a little bit of a break from dating right now.”
“On behalf of the single men of the world,” he’d said, “I beg you to reconsider. It’s a real loss for us to have a beautiful girl like you taken out of the dating game.”
I think I might have giggled at that. I also think I was appalled with myself for not coming up with a witty reply.
While I see Simon a good deal over the next two weeks, I’m disappointed that I see Alex hardly at all. He’s always rushing to meetings or encased in his office working on some project.
He says hello to me in the mornings and good evening to me as he leaves the office for the day. But, so far at least, that’s about the extent of our interaction.
That’s why I’m surprised when, at two o’clock in the afternoon, I see him walk through the doors of the office and not into his office, but straight to my desk.
“Hey Evie,” he says to me. “The job still treating you okay?”
“It’s fine,” I answer, brightly. “Really good, actually.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” he says. Then he stands beside my desk, looking slightly awkward as though unsure what to say. This is a little bit confusing for me because, I’m sure he’s never been awkward or unsure with me before.
“I...um...I just came from Gabe’s office,” he says quickly as though it were the first thought to come to his head. “He’s just got done designing this new software development program. We think it’s ready for testing.”
“That’s great,” I say. “I’m sure he’s happy.”
“Yeah,” Alex answers. “Now I’ve just got to break the news to Simon.”
For some reason, he looks more than a bit unsettled at this prospect.
“Well, Simon’ll be happy, won’t he?” I say. “I mean, new software’s always good for the company, right?”
“In theory,” Alex says, “but, truth be told, Simon’s never liked your brother much. And, I’m sure you know Gabe doesn’t care much for him.”
I have heard Gabe make some snarky remarks about Simon before around my parents’ dinner table. But, I decide it’s best not to mention that to Alex.
“Well, I’m sure it’ll be fine,” I say. He nods and, with a small smile, I move my eyes back down to my computer thinking that’ll be the end of the conversation. I expect to see him go back to his office.
He doesn’t. Instead, he continues to stand awkwardly beside my desk. I keep my head down and try to focus on my work but, all the same, I’m very aware of his continued presence beside me.
I can feel my heart begin to beat quickly in my chest and I try to keep my cheeks from going pink.
“Evie?” he asks finally.
“Yes,” I answer much too quickly, whipping my head up from my desktop. The movement is so quick that I manage to hit my head on the low-hanging light fixture.
Alex gives a good-natured chuckle and I this time I can’t stop my face from going fully red with embarrassment.
“Careful with that,” Alex says. “It used to cause our temp all sorts of problems. He was probably even clumsier than you.”
“I didn’t know that was possible,” I answer trying to give him a smile. My clumsy nature has always been a sort of inside joke between me and all my friends.
“Trust me,” Alex says, “you’re not nearly as bad as you think.”
I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean. But, I smile and try to take it as a compliment. At least he looks more relaxed now.
“Listen, Evie,” he says, “I was wondering. Are you...doing anything tomorrow night?”
“I don’t have any plans, why?” I ask as casually as I can with my heart hammering in my chest and a sound like bells ringing in my ears.
“I just thought—”
Alex is interrupted and I jump when the door to Simon’s office opens and he walks out to my desk. I look up at Alex who has stopped midsentence and now glances, pale-faced at Simon, as though terrified of the older man.
“Evie,” Simon says, “can I see you in my office for a minute? I need you to write a memo for me.”
I look to Alex, secretly hoping that he’ll finish what he was saying before Simon whisks me away. Simon follows my gaze and he looks at me and Alex for a moment.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was interrupting,” he says looking at Alex. I can now see a slightly smug smile forming on his lips as though he has just beaten Alex at some sort of game.
“Don’t worry about it,” Alex says. He’s trying to sound dismissive but, I can tell he’s disappointed. “I can talk to you later, Evie.”
“Okay,” I answer before standing from my chair and following Simon into his office.
“Close the door, please,” he says once I’m inside. I do. When I turn around, I expect to see Simon sitting at his desk as usual.
He’s not there. In
stead, he’s moving towards me. There’s a strange look in his eyes and, for some reason, I find myself frozen to the spot in fear.
“What were you and Alex talking about?” he asks. The question sounds casual but, I can see a look in his eye that I’ve never seen before. It feels almost predatory.
“Oh, we were just talking about Gabe,” I answer only half honestly. “He’s having a good day, apparently.”
Simon smiles at me as though he knows I’m not telling the whole truth.
“He likes you,” Simon says. “You know that, don’t you?”
“You...you mean Alex?” I ask becoming more and more nervous the closer Simon comes to me. “We’re just friends. We’ve always just been friends.”
“Maybe that was true when you were younger,” Simon says, now coming so close to me that I can feel his breath on my face. “But, now things have changed. You’ve changed, haven’t you Evie?”
He’s very close to me now. I’m trying to think of something relatively intelligent to say. Instead, I’m opening and closing my mouth like a fish. Finally, something comes to me.
“If...if you’re worried about me and Alex keeping things professional—” I begin.
“Don’t worry, Evie,” Simon says. He’s smiling at me and while we’re closer to each other than we’ve ever been, he doesn’t move any closer. “I’m not worried about being professional. In fact, I would be a little worried if Alex didn’t notice you. You are a beautiful woman.”
He reaches his hand out to me and lightly strokes my hair. I can smell the cologne he is wearing, wafting from his wrist. He smells amazing and as I look up into his dark eyes, I realize what might be about to happen. Butterflies erupt in my stomach as Simon does indeed take my cheek in his palm.
When I feel his thumb move over my cheek, I involuntarily close my eyes. I know I shouldn’t give into this.
I try to remember Alex, what he was about to ask me before Simon got a hold of me, but then, I feel Simon close the small gap between us and put his lips on mine.
His lips are every bit as warm and soft as I imagined they would be. Before I know it, I’m kissing him back.
But, just as I begin to respond, I hear the door to the office open. Immediately I jump away from Simon and turn to see Alex.