The girl had a boyfriend. I couldn’t have her anyway.
Because you want her.
No. I did not want her. Never mind that I kept thinking about how soft the skin at the nape of her neck was, or that little strip of skin just between her tank top and the top of her jeans. Never mind that I desperately wanted to kiss her there.
Nope. Not part of the plan. I had just made that pact with myself. Or rather remade it. But before I knew it, I scooted out of the booth, out the door of Joe’s, and went jogging across the street.
She saw me as she was finishing up her phone call. I didn’t like the stress lines around her mouth. Though even when she was frowning, she was gorgeous. Her hazel green eyes were both fiery and bleak, and as she hung up, she plastered a fake smile on her face. “Oh, hey.”
“Hey, yourself.” I cocked my head. “You following me?”
Her eyes went wide. “Why would you say that?”
I frowned. Something was up with her. “Relax. I’m teasing. No painting this morning?”
“I wanted to grab a cup of coffee and get some air. Maybe it’ll inspire me.”
I inclined my head toward the café. “Want to join us?”
She smiled up at me. “Wow, a double-team date. Kinky.” A flush lit her face and her hands flew up to cover those pretty cheeks. “Shit, that came out wrong.”
Two things happened simultaneously. I laughed, and my dick twitched. Back away slowly. She’s trouble. “No.” Though I wasn’t sure if the no was for her or my dick. Damn thing seemed to have a mind of its own. “More like, you need to eat, and I’m trying to say thank you for the good advice.”
She shook her head. “No thanks needed. Besides, I think I owed you.”
I shoved my hands into my pockets and rolled back onto my heels. Why were things so hard with her? Or so easy? Because even though this was an awkward conversation and I should be desperate to get away from her, it was easy to be in her presence.
I had zero urge to run. I just wanted to be closer. “Right. Now that we have that reestablished, come have breakfast. Come on. I won’t bite.”
“That’s disappointing,” she murmured under her breath.
My dick swelled. Mother of fucking God. I was pretty sure the damn thing was never going down.
She rolled her shoulders back. “Sure. I need to eat.”
The relief flooded my veins.
“Come on. I’m buying.”
“You just said the magic words.”
She trailed behind me into the restaurant. And I could see that even though she was agreeing to join me, her sour mood hadn’t dissipated. Something on the call had bothered her. “You okay? You seem a little upset.”
“Fine. Just an unexpected phone call.”
“I had one of those last week. Your parents?”
She shook her head. “Worse.”
When she didn’t elaborate, I let it go for the time being. I wanted to smack her twat of a boyfriend. I led the way to the table where I’d left Lucas, who stood immediately. “Len, you remember Lucas?”
She treated him to a sweet smile that had me holding back a growl. “Nice to see you again, Lucas.”
Lucas turned on the charm, and I wanted to hit him. “Pleasure is all mine. Here, sit next to me.” He shifted to allow her into the booth.
Len stuttered. “Oh, thank you. That’s sweet.”
“This way I can get to know Sebastian’s friend better.”
Oh hell no. I took her elbow and guided her into the booth next to me. I was not letting Lucas poach this one.
It’s not poaching when you say you don’t want to be with someone. Never mind all that.
Len’s brows furrowed. She didn’t say anything. And Lucas, well, my brother just laughed. It should have felt like the most awkward thing ever. Having a conversation with a brother I never knew I had, with a girl next to me I wasn’t sure I wanted. But it felt like the most natural thing in the world. I was the most comfortable I’d been in months.
* * *
Penny
“So, Lucas, do you live in the city?”
Lucas nodded. “Yeah, I go to NYU.”
He, like Sebastian, was a stunner. Like a jaw-on-the-floor, lick-some-abs kind of stunner. The two of them partying around town would become a problem if the media ever caught wind that Sebastian was the prince.
Lucas grinned at me. “Sebastian tells me you’re an artist. Isn’t that handy? He’s kind of an artist. A photographer. Seems like you two are a match made in heaven.” He grinned.
Next to me, Sebastian stiffened. “Lucas, please try and behave.”
It was weird. When Lucas grinned, there was something familiar about him. It was in the jaw.
“I am behaving. I’m just trying to see what’s up with you two crazy kids.”
I glanced between him and Sebastian. “Uhm, we’re just friends,” I mumbled. “Neighbors, really.”
From the corner of my eye, I could see Sebastian’s jaw tense. “She’s right. Friends. Len has a boyfriend.”
Lucas clutched a hand over his heart. “My heart is broken. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to give it a try.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. “Are you always this outrageous?”
He winked. “You better believe it.”
Sebastian shook his head. “Ignore him. He’s dicking with you, but mostly me.”
Lucas laughed. “It’s true. I am fucking with him. Honestly, if you do chuck your boyfriend don’t fall for Sebastian. You could do better. Like me. I’m not seeing anyone. I happen to like bohemian artists.”
I turned my attention to focus on Lucas for a moment. “So Lucas,” I said as I tried to diffuse the dick swinging, “what’s your story? Why are you sitting here hitting on me and not out running around with some fabulous NYU coed?”
He shrugged. “Why would I? You’re the most beautiful girl in the world.”
Sebastian ran his hand through his hair. “You just won’t quit, will you?”
Lucas shook his head. “Nope.” He winked at me. “Are you buying it?”
“Only as a hook to a song. I think you’re flirting with me because you think it will make Sebastian crazy. It won’t. Because we’re just friends.” I sat back and deliberately picked up Lucas’s coffee. “So, why don’t you tell me about why you’re a commitmentphobe?”
Next to me Sebastian laughed. “Oh, this should be interesting.”
* * *
Penny
Once Lucas headed off to class, Sebastian offered to walk me home.
“Actually, I was going to check out a studio nearby if you want to come.” For a moment, he looked like he might say no. But he surprised me.
“Sure. Why not? I don’t have to be at the bar to do inventory for another few hours.”
“Oh, okay.” I hadn’t anticipated him saying yes. I’d already texted Ariel to take the handoff, but I had to be flexible. I’d let her know once we got to the studio.
I found the studio easily enough. It was in a little hidden alcove in the East Village where you’d be just as likely to find artists who lived in their trendy lofts or former warehouse spaces as you would be to find actors and students and vintage shops.
I found the tiny studio that offered short-term rental space and knew it would be perfect if I wanted to lend some credence to my cover. And also, if I actually wanted to paint, which I did. More and more each day.
“This place is great. Awesome light. You can people watch.”
I nodded. “Yeah. It’s not too expensive either.”
“You know, I’ve never actually painted anything before.”
I turned to face Sebastian. “How is that even possible? You pick a paint brush and put something on canvas.”
He shrugged. “I guess when I went to school there were some options to take some drawing classes but never painting. Besides, I preferred the camera.”
“We have to fix this immediately.” I went over to the reception desk hidden in the corne
r and paid for some studio time. The supplies in the studio were free to use for anyone who paid for the time, though most would bring their own. It would be handy in case you forgot something.
“We’re all set. Grab a smock in the corner and the canvas and we’ll get started.”
He laughed. “You serious?”
“Yep. I paid for an hour.”
“You? Paid?” He frowned.
I nodded. “Well, I was going to check out the space anyway and see how I liked it. You just happened to be with me. You can choose to paint, or you can watch, or you can go do whatever you have to go do.”
I prayed his choice would be the former. I wanted him to stay. Despite what I said earlier about staying friends, despite knowing that was the better course of action, I still wanted him close. And not because you’re supposed to be keeping an eye on him.
For the second time in thirty minutes, he surprised me. He pulled up a stool and sat right next to me. “Okay, so what do I do? What do I paint?”
I laughed. “What do you feel like painting?”
He laughed. “Is this the part where I request a nude model?” He winked at me.
I giggled. “I think we’re going to start you off with more basic subjects first.” I pointed at the bowl of fruit sitting on the table against the far wall. “Why not start with that? And then you can move on to the naked model and shadowing.”
He leaned over to me. “Are you sure? Because it looks like I might have a model right here.”
I flushed. No, you idiot. It’s not real flirting. You cannot take him seriously. “Not on your life.”
He shrugged. “Can’t hold it against me for trying,” he laughed. “So am I getting this painting lesson so you can get a photography lesson?”
“Actually, that may not be a bad idea. I have a camera that I haven’t busted open but once. It’s doing nothing in a drawer.” And that part was the truth. I’d brought the camera that I’d gotten as a gift to myself. I hadn’t started any long-range surveillance of him yet. I’d planned to bust that one out if he was dating and I couldn’t get close, but he mostly kept to himself.
He worked on his photos, worked at the bar, and worked out. He didn’t seem to have anyone significant in his life. No one except for Lucas. Speaking of which, I made a mental note to start tracking Lucas’s whereabouts. Ariel and I would need to start double duty or ask Noah Blake for more help. If he was getting close to Sebastian, he could put Sebastian in danger. He was also a wildcard, and wildcards always had to be watched closely.
For the next hour, we painted. I got paint all over myself, but that was par for the course. The best part was Sebastian got paint all over himself. And he didn’t do a half bad bowl of fruit either. It was easy talking to him. Laughing. When the hour was up, he carried our canvases to hang them on the wall. We’d retrieve them when they were dry tomorrow. “So where to?” Sebastian asked.
“I don’t know. I guess I hadn’t really planned anything past checking the place out.”
“If you have time, want to get your camera? We can tool around the city a little bit before I have to go to work.”
“You sure there isn’t something else you’d rather be doing?”
His gaze fixed on mine. “Actually, no. Not really.”
“Then by all means. Show me the ways of a world-class photographer.”
“Well, not world-class yet. I like it. And if I could, I’d pursue it full-time.”
“Why don’t you?”
“For the same reasons that you’re just now pursuing becoming an artist: too many obligations, too much pressure to do the ‘other thing.’”
“But you know what? It’s terrifying. It absolutely is. I’m not going to lie to you. But something about you seems brave to me. You could absolutely do this if you wanted.”
He was a prince. While his father was alive, he could do as he pleased … for the most part. He still had to do state-required things, but he had freedom. Didn’t he?
Chapter Nineteen
Sebastian
Things had gone better with Lucas than I’d expected. It had been a couple of days since breakfast. I’d had two shifts at the bar, and so far, Lucas hadn’t called, or come by. I thought it had gone well. Had I played this wrong? There was no manual for, “Hey, I’m your long-lost brother. I want you to come to my island and take my place.”
And to make things worse, Len was distracting the hell out of me. It was like I couldn’t turn a corner without seeing her or thinking about her. Well she does live next door.
I hadn’t been avoiding her exactly. Every time I walked to work, like tonight, I passed directly in front of her apartment. And sure enough, she always had the French doors open, and I could see inside.
Usually she was wearing some short-shorts and some top that left little to the imagination as to just how ample her assets were. The funny thing was, the old me could have been all over her. But I couldn’t afford that distraction right now because if I wanted to be free, truly free without the weight of responsibility, the need to focus on the Lucas thing.
It was only after I left Len back at her place a couple of days ago that it occurred to me that the morning in the studio had pretty much been our first date. Well sort-of date, anyway.
You’re pathetic.
Every dating experience I’d ever had, even when I was in the wild rebellious phase, someone else had always been there. King’s Guard, some kind of chaperone, or rooms full of people.
Today had also been the first time that I’d been able to just hang out with a girl with zero expectations. And these last six months had been the first time I’d actually ever been on my own. I was so used to everyone treating me like a royal and bending over backwards to cater to me.
And women, they were a-whole-nother fish. Every single woman I’d ever met always envisioned herself a princess. I wasn’t an idiot. I understood that I breathed a certain rarefied air. Because of who I was, I had unfettered access to the whole world. I had access to the kind of places, money, and women most people could only dream of. And of course, I wasn’t complaining. I recognized I was lucky. I wasn’t that self-involved.
But I still wanted Len to like me because of me. And my whole life I’d had real doubts if that had ever happened. But not with Len. She had no idea who I was. There was something about her that drew me to her. There was a certain vulnerability mixed with an iron-core strength that I found so sexy. And she didn’t even know it.
And she was awkward and hilarious and funny and sweet. Jesus, I sounded crazy. I didn’t even know this girl. Don’t you? You recognize her as a mirror to yourself.
My phone rang as I walked the several blocks to the bar. Blocked number. My father, of course. “Hi, Dad.”
“Sebastian. Tell me you’re well.”
“Of course I am, Dad.” The guilt ate at me. I recognized that my parents might be worried about me. I had no Prince’s Guard. Roone still hadn’t answered a single one of my emails. He was probably pissed as hell.
For as long as I could remember, I’d never gone without bodyguards somewhere nearby. While it was liberating for me, it was probably frightening for my parents. “I know you’re worried. But I’ll be back soon. In time for the vote.”
My father sighed. “You really think I worry about the vote? You think that’s why I want you home?”
How had the two of us grown so far apart? I used to idolize my father. He was my hero—my everything. And then you got a different dream. There’d been a time I wanted to be king just like him. And now, we were on two different planets, on everything. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Sebastian, I’m only worried about your safety. I’m worried because you won’t talk to me. I’m worried that my son has grown so far apart from me I won’t recognize him when I see him again.”
“I’m still me. Just different.” And because I didn’t know what else to say, I added, “I saw him a couple days ago.”
“What’s he like?” I could
almost hear the emotion in his voice.
I wasn’t sure how to answer. But then I decided to be honest. “He’s shrewd. Cunning in a way. Also, a total troublemaker.” I chuckled to myself. “He’s also smart. Loyal. Believes in justice. Fights for those who can’t fight for themselves.”
“I still can’t believe you found him. I looked for ages.”
“That’s the part that took the longest. Obviously, I didn’t want to use your men. So I found a few less-than-scrupulous guys who didn’t have to go through legal channels to track people. It took all this time. His life has been so different from mine.”
My father’s voice was shaky. “Did he … ask about me? Want to know anything?”
I’d never heard my father like this before. He sounded … unsure. “Oh, he wanted to know everything. I told him what I could. What I knew. But I don’t think that could possibly satisfy him. He has questions. Because despite the circumstances, regardless of whether or not you knew or didn’t know, he didn’t have you in his life. And he feels that loss.”
Another silence. And finally, when my father started talking, it was as I expected. “I didn’t fall in love with your mother until several years after she had you. I married her because that was the arrangement. She was young, beautiful, kind, as far as I could tell. But our interactions were so formal, so stilted. It wasn’t like now. We weren’t allowed freedom to move about how we wanted. Even our dates weren’t free roaming, and I was always hyperaware that we had snipers and Prince’s Guard who were following close. This event here. This charity function there. I liked her. I thought she was bright. But it wasn’t the same as marrying someone you love.”
“If you didn’t love her, then why marry her?”
“Duty. I knew what was expected. What was needed. It was what my father wanted and what the monarchy required.”
“What about what you needed? If you didn’t love her, you didn’t think about what that would do to her? What that would do to the children that you eventually would have, sensing something was off with their parents?”
Modern Fairy Tale: Twelve Books of Breathtaking Romance Page 88