by Alice Kirks
After a little coaxing of her father, the four headed out for a ride in the country on one of the days together. Lord Ennis had been reticent, making the point that surely, she should be wary after the accident. Katie was determined, pointing out that if she did not get back on the horse soon, her fear may overcome her and she may never ride again. It took a little time, but he was eventually persuaded.
At a gentle gallop, Katie and Captain Barkley had left Mel and Lord Sutton some distance behind. Katie could not help but notice Captain Barkley’s constant attention, his slight concern, even though she was riding well on her own horse, who she knew almost as well as herself. After much pacification, they slowed to a gentle trot and, for fear of losing her sister and Lord Sutton entirely, eventually dismounted to walk for a while.
Robert had spoken a little of the war, of the gallivanting through Europe, but the subject of his last tour had not been discussed. Katie secretly wanted to know if maybe he was feeling towards her, the way she had begun to feel about him. Perhaps if she brought up his travels, she could bring the subject around to what he planned for his future.
‘I would imagine you are quite happy to be home now, after all the fighting. I cannot begin to imagine what war is like.’
‘I am. And yes, battle is dirty and cold and bloody.’
‘But you must have seen many places.’
‘Oh, indeed. As I have spoken before, I have travelled many parts of Europe, and before word reached us about the treaty, we were battling at Washington.’
‘In America?’
‘Yes.’
‘What was it like?’
Robert looked contemplatively out ahead of him. A solemnity dousing his features. Katie suddenly realised that he must have experienced some terrible things, and hthat er enquiry may be raising some occurrences he wished not to be reminded of.
‘Do forgive me.’ She said quickly. ‘I did not think. I am sure you do not want to dwell on it.’
He smiled gently across at her, guiding his horse down the track. ‘It is fine. But yes, I am afraid I lost many good men and whilst it sounds exciting, it was far from pleasant.’
‘I understand. It is just, I suppose, I have always wanted to travel. I long to see different places and cultures,’ she gushed, ‘places I have only read about but that charge my imagination.’
He looked at her with a somewhat amused glance, and Katie suddenly felt foolish. ‘I am sure you think me silly.’ She dropped her head and concentrated on the stone beneath her boots.
‘On the contrary. I quite admire your zest. You remind me of my sister.’
‘You did not tell me you had a sister.’
‘Yes, much younger than I. Alison always talked of adventure when she was old enough. But she is only yet 16 years old and has much[MJ3][pm4] to learn about the world, and herself.’
‘Where is she now?’
‘At our home, in Kent.’
‘Ah, Kent.’
‘Yes, my parents passed away when I was twelve, leaving my aunt, for a time, and then my older brother to take charge.’
‘Oh, how sad, yes, I was sorry to hear about your brother.’
‘We were not particularly close. After my parent’s death, I spent most of my time outdoors, rarely came in for the required dinners and sought some solace in the house keeper, Kitty. She would bring me into the kitchen, scrub me down,’ he chuckled light heartedly, ‘and fill me with cake before sending me off to my room.’
‘She sounds lovely.’ Katie smiled.
‘She was, and still is. But my behaviour was not tolerated for long. I could not contemplate being hemmed in and was determined to see the world, so the army seemed like the natural choice.’
‘Have you been to London?’
‘Oh yes. Several times.’
‘I have always wanted to go to London. It just sounds so full of life.’
‘Perhaps,’ he looked over at her warmly, ‘I can take you one day soon.’
Outwardly, Katie smiled sweetly. Inwardly, her heart near burst out of her chest as he gazed down at her. How could she feel this way by being with one person? It felt so right. He felt so right, as though she never wanted to leave his side.
Captain Barkley was the hero and the warrior and the adventurer of all the novels she had ever read. And he was right here, walking beside her. Katie could never have imagined someone being this perfect. Whilst this may have all started as a way to get out of an arranged marriage to one, she was swiftly falling for the heart of another.
Chapter 8
The servants left the dining room having placed the variety of dishes on the table. Their family dinners now included Captain Barkley since his arrival and him staying at Spencer Manor, and Lord Sutton had been invited to stay as he had spent time with the group on their outing that day.
Katie had been biding her time, but knowing that her feelings were getting stronger, felt panicked to ensure the engagement to Lord Sutton simply did not happen.
How could it now, after all that had occurred? The family were completely convinced that Katie’s memory was lost. All those novels she had read during her youth had aided her in her pretence. Remembering how someone with Amnesia may feel and act, she had incorporated that knowledge into this farce.
But still, this could not go on forever. She needed to secure her future for herself. Whilst, at first, Captain Barkley had served a purpose of betrayal to stop the announcement of her engagement to Lord Sutton, the time spent with him had deepened her feelings for him.
She could not tell him that of course. No, that would give her away. He would be confused that, surely, she would be in love with him already, seeing as she thought he was her intended. Oh, this was getting all quite confusing, and suddenly, a fear of losing him overwhelmed her.
‘Robert and I are to set the date for our wedding.’ The words were out of her mouth before she had time to think of the repercussions.
Suddenly, she flitted her eyes to Robert, petrified of his reaction. He was gazing down at her with a gentle smile. Not quite acquiescence, but almost amused. Before Katie had a chance to explain herself, the family weighed in.
‘Oh, how delightful.’ Her mother added, though Katie could see the restrain in her congratulations.
Lord Sutton nodded his approval and Melinda looked across the table and beamed at her sister. Melinda had thrown her several looks on their days spent together, and Katie had been surprised how easily her sister had been fooled by her act of memory loss. The looks, she felt, had partly been gratitude even though Melinda could not have known that Katie was aware of her love for Lord Sutton.
‘Oh, how exciting. I am to have a brother.’ She exclaimed. ‘Have you thought of when it will be, maybe you could have a Christmas wedding.’
The general air of celebration was soon dampened by her father’s reaction. The only one at the table who felt the necessity to quash her joy.
‘Katie, whilst it is understandable that you feel for Captain Barkley,’ the older man spoke as though the younger were not even in the room. ‘I hardly think you can go into marriage with the little knowledge that we have. Apart from debt, and the fancy for adventure, we know nothing about the man. I hardly think, at this time, that this is suitable at all.’
The room, now doused with an oppressing despondency, became suddenly still and silent. Katie’s cheeks flamed red and felt on fire. How could her father humiliate Robert like that? The embarrassment she felt almost crushed her.
‘This situation is too much.’ Abruptly, her father excused himself and with swiftness, left the room. Robert, Katie noticed, concentrated intensely on the silverware. Lady Ennis was unsure where to look, but Melinda looked appalled and stared straight at Katie, before turning her attention to Captain Barkley.
‘Captain I am so sorry for my father’s rudeness…’
Katie could not wait to hear the rest of her apology. She needed to speak to her father. He needed to know how she felt and how dreadful a position he h
ad put her in. How could he be so callous?
Leaving the dining room, Katie travelled hurriedly down the hallway and found her father in his study. There was now no doubt in her mind that she could not marry Lord Sutton, the very thought of being forced to marry, when she was not in love was heart-breaking enough.
But to marry a man whom her sister deeply loved, and he, her, seemed a desperate state of affairs. Two sisters completely miserable just seemed too much to bear. If she could not convince him that she was to marry Robert, she may just be forced to tell him the truth. To confess that all this had been a farce and that she now had found the elusive suitor he so desperately wanted for her.
Lord Ennis stood, his back to her pouring a drink from a decanter. On hearing her enter, he turned and looked intently at her. Katie did not wait for him to speak first.
‘Papa, what is the matter? I thought surely you would be happy for me. How could you say those dreadful things, and right in front of Robert? You completely humiliated me, and Robert too.’
‘Katie,’ he took in a deep breath. ‘I am just worried for you, that is all.’
‘But why, Papa? Robert has been nothing but a gentleman. He cares for me; I know this deeply. And I care for him.’
‘You cannot possibly care for him!’ Her father snapped.
Katie looked shocked at his sudden change of tone, and as he noticed her reaction, his shoulders relaxed a little and he blew out a long breath.
‘Katie, my darling,’ his tone now a little softer, ‘you know I love you dearly and only want you to be happy. And yes, Captain Barkley has certainly been upstanding in this whole situation, but we owe him gratitude and nothing more.’
‘What situation?’ Katie feigned ignorance.
‘Oh, my darling child, how I wish you were better.’
‘Father, I am confused. I am fine. I know Dr Croft has been treating me for the fall, but other than that, all is well. I promise.’
Lord Ennis looked at her with such immense sadness, that the guilt she had struggled to repress, suddenly rose within and threatened to overwhelm her. She could no longer do this. What had started as a fine plan, had now gone on too long. Not thinking how it would upset her family, she had only been thinking of herself. To see her father so distraught pushed her to an uncomfortable decision.
I need to tell him the truth.
Deep within her, fear grew as she imagined how terribly upset he would be with her, after all the effort and arrangements that had been made to accommodate her ‘illness.’ He would be so angry. But she could not keep this façade up any longer.
‘Papa, I need to tell you something…’
At that very second, Melinda burst into the study behind her, surprising both herself and her father. Her face betrayed concern and she frowned deeply at her father.
‘I am ashamed father, of how our family must look to Captain Barkley. Since Katie’s fall, he has been here every day, attending to what has been necessary. He is a war hero and has gallantly served England so we can have the privileges we so dearly cherish. How could you be so cruel? How could you humiliate the Captain like that, after everything he has done?’
Lord Ennis glared at Melinda’s reproach and intrusion. ‘On this occasion I will excuse your impertinence Melinda, you do not fully understand. You are but a child and this is a delicate situation.’
‘Indeed, it is,’ Melinda agreed, refusing to back down. ‘Poor Katie needs care and protection, we cannot have her condition worsening, can we? Do you not remember what Dr Croft said?’
Lord Ennis held his glare and then suddenly dropped his gaze. Turning from her, he spoke a little softer. ‘Of course. I am not a fool.’
Observing her father, Katie thought that he almost looked reticent and apologetic, Melinda’s reminder obviously prompting the memory of the doctor’s warning of a possible breakdown, if her situation were not handled with delicacy. But his reaction only compelled her to tell him the truth.
‘Melinda, I was just about to tell Papa…’
‘That you need to rest.’ Melinda grabbed hold of Katie’s two hands and pulled her towards her so Melinda’s back now faced her father. Melinda winked dramatically at her sister and Katie struggled to contain a gasp.
Melinda knew her secret.
‘I think I will take Katie to her room for a while,’ she spoke to her father over her shoulder, and then looked back at Katie. ‘You look quite pale.’
Having dragged Katie up the stairs to her room, Melinda finally closed the door behind them and they burst into a fit of giggles.
‘Oh Melinda,’ Katie breathed when they had both finally calmed down. ‘Am I such a wicked person?’
‘Absolutely not. If the wonderful and handsome Captain Robert Barkley had come to my rescue, I too would have faked an illness to keep him in my sights.’ The younger sister grinned. ‘But I am in love with another.’
Katie eyed her carefully. ‘Hmm, I wonder who your secret love could be.’ She teased.
‘But you know, don’t you?’ Melinda smiled.
‘I do. So, what of Lord Sutton?’
Melinda laughed with giddy excitement. ‘Oh Katie, but I do love him so. I have loved him for so long, and he I. But how did you know?’
‘I saw you both in the maze hedge some time ago.’
Melinda quickly brought her hand to her mouth, her giddiness immediately halted. ‘You do not think anyone else did, do you?’
‘Well if that were so, surely someone would have mentioned it by now?’
‘Yes, yes, you are right.’ Melinda sat beside Katie on the bed and gazed up at her. ‘But Captain Barkley is so perfect for you Katie. So dashing and handsome and heroic. All those things you used to read about when you were younger. I am not wishing for you to continue this just for my sake. I hope you do not think me selfish.’
‘No Mel, no, not at all. I could never impose on your happiness. Truly, if this plan had failed, I would have had to think of more extreme measures.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean,’ Katie paused, for it had been something she had considered but never confessed. How could she, it would have shown her hand to Mel that she knew of her secret love. ‘I mean, I would have considered leaving.’
‘No. No, you cannot leave me.’
‘Well,’ Katie tried to comfort her sister, ‘as it has happened, this plan has worked. So far.’
‘Well, yes, but surely it is no longer just a plan.’ Mel raised her eyebrows at her sister knowingly. ‘I have watched you Katie, the way you look at him when he is not watching you. The way your cheeks flush when he compliments you.’ Melinda paused for a long moment.
‘Do you love him?’
Katie took a little time to think about her answer. Did she love him, it felt as though she was falling in love, but having never experienced it before, she couldn’t be sure. What if it was just infatuation, the whimsical results of his gallantly rescuing her?
‘I do not know, not yet. But even if I did, I could not tell him.’
‘Why ever not?’
‘Because he is only here out of duty. Being the gentleman that he is, his presence here is only because everyone believes that quack and his story of the Count in Italy.’