by Stevens, GJ
We stood for what seemed like an age, but when the deafening call from the helicopter blades came back into focus, I realised we had to do something.
Jess’s voice cut through the turmoil. “They did this to me. So we have to get the children back before they can do the same, or worse.”
Dropping the chair leg to the floor, Cassie stepped forward, working her way around the glass panel and stepping outside as if ready to take on the world.
Cassie said something, but I didn’t catch the detail, instead looking to movement beyond the glass at the far end of the room. A piercing call cut through the air, but to the sound of a muffled gunshot, the shadow slumped to the ground.
“We’ve got to go,” Jess said, turning back from the same direction.
Alex didn’t wait, seeming unafraid as she walked to Jess, motioning for Mandy to follow.
I stayed fixed to the spot. “We can’t run away from the helicopters.”
Jess turned back. “It’s not the soldiers I’m worried about. Their noise is drawing more creatures from all around.”
Picking a cloth napkin from one of the few tables still upright, I followed the others rushing through the gap and into the daylight which seemed so bright, bringing such vivid colour to the mess covering Jess.
As I stepped from the building, everywhere I looked the creatures who had lined the windows of our sanctuary lay torn, ripped beyond recognition and discarded all around, the ground slick with a sticky blood sucking at my trainers with every step.
I didn’t have to avoid the putrid scene for long. As I looked around, I saw soldiers dressed in black, counting nine coming from where we’d run. Each turned, twisting around to look with their long rifles. I caught sight of a figure on a roof overlooking the carpark, beside him another crouched with the length of a long barrel aimed in our direction.
The helicopter buzzed over where we stood, then vanished after taking a steep turn away just as quickly as it arrived.
Glancing at Alex taking in the scene as I had, but with a hard-faced look as if ready to go down fighting, I turned back to the soldiers as a group of three in the centre separated from the others, walking ahead of the rest holding their positions.
Each of the three looked to my side, two through their weapon’s sight, and I knew it was Jess they targeted. Who could blame them? I couldn’t help but follow their look to the woman so far removed from the preened image we were used to from the TV.
I stepped in the path between the three and Jess with my heart pounding in my chest, not understanding why I did it, other than it felt like the right thing to do. I glared at the three, not adjusting their stride towards us.
Staring at the small group, I couldn’t see any difference in their appearance, barely able to see anything apart from between the lip of the black ballistic helmets and dark scarves covering their mouths.
Within two car lengths, the soldier in the centre held his gloved hand to the air, and I flinched back as he swung his rifle from his grip, slinging it over his shoulder to rest on the strap.
I couldn’t help but wonder why they hadn’t gunned us down yet. If I had a gun and looked on at Jess for the first time, wouldn’t I?
The middle soldier held his hands to the side, motioning to the ground. Without pause, each of those flanking him let their weapons down.
The centre man raised his hand to his mouth and pulled down the dark covering to reveal a clean-shaven face.
“I’m Major Thompson,” he called out with a measured volume. He leaned to the side as if trying to get a better look at Jess. “We don’t have time.”
I stepped from her path, knowing they could have just shot me out of the way.
“Don’t do anything,” I said, and Thompson looked my way, his eyes narrowing but losing focus as if distracted.
“Hold position,” he said, but not to us as he reached to a pocket at the front of his black jacket, pulling out a white envelope.
52
JESSICA
I read the writing as he drew it out, pushing it towards me. It was from Toni.
Proof she was still alive.
It was her writing, unless her mother had the same beautiful curl to the letters I’d always marvelled at.
The middle soldier, Thompson, stepped forward and I licked my dry lips, regretting the dried covering of rancid blood. I couldn’t wipe my mouth on my sleeve, there was no area of my body not covered in the same, or so much worse.
I turned to Logan in slow motion, my mind lethargic as if I was coming back from fainting. He held something out. A crisp white cloth. He raised a corner-mouth smile, and I took the napkin.
I saw the caution in the soldier’s narrowed eyes. I saw in his expression how unnatural it felt to approach me when he’d spent the last week filling walking dead bodies with lead. He didn’t want to show the apprehension to his men, his walk still strong and confident.
A major, I thought he said, but he wore no insignia or unit designation on the black uniform. He looked battle weary; fatigued by what he’d been through. I’d seen the look before, the tiredness behind the eyes, but I guessed most in the military would be the same by now.
I looked to the envelope, turning my head and staring at Alex. Raising my brow, I wanted to know what she thought I should do.
For a moment I marvelled at how I’d changed. I wanted her advice. I wanted to know if I should find out what the architect of all this pain wanted to say, or would doing so just make everything so much worse?
Alex's expression stayed blank as if she didn’t want to influence my decision.
Thompson stepped back as I took the paper, but with surprise he didn’t draw his weapon.
There was no doubt her hand had written it. My pounding heart told me so, or it could have been fear for what the letter would tell me.
Was she going to explain how I could stay alive and not be like this forever? Not need the taste of human flesh to be normal in between the hunger? Would I be able to control it? Could I switch it on and off when I needed? Maybe I’d already answered my question, and to those who’d been watching in the last five minutes.
I paused, breath halting for a moment as a thought flashed into my mind.
Were these soldiers here to observe what had just happened? Was this all just an orchestrated event? Had I passed or failed their test?
With anger growing, I looked up to the two figures on the roof. The long barrel of the high-powered rifle that alerted me to the peril turned away, moving as if I’d caught them looking where they shouldn’t. Then I saw a camera pointed in my direction, held by the guy at his side.
She did this. All of this and I’d proven to her she’d succeeded, and I knew what this was all about. I knew I was the missing piece.
I could control the thing inside me, like I would have to if I were on a battlefield.
I couldn’t read the note. To do so would be part of her plan and she’d somehow end up drawing me back.
It would all be lies to bend me to her will.
Turning the envelope on its side, I pinched two fingers to the edge, ready to rip it down the middle and throw it back in Thompson’s face.
53
LOGAN
“No.”
Alex called out, lunging forward and snatching the envelope from Jess’s hand. I watched as Jess’s eyes went wide, her lips curling to a snarl as the soldiers at Thompson’s flanks took a step back, bringing their rifles to bear, but Thompson held his footing, raising his palms at his side.
“Think of the children,” Alex said, her voice sharp, then softening as she pushed the envelope back into Jess’s hands. “They need to know if they’re okay.”
I looked to Alex, expecting her to shy back, but she held Jess’s gaze with her brow furrowed. Almost without pause, Jess’s snarl melted away, and the soldiers lowered their rifles.
A sorrowful smile settled on Jess’s lips as she relaxed, drawing a deep breath.
“It will all be lies,” she said, lo
oking at Alex shaking her head.
“But it’s all we have,” Alex replied, taking a step closer and taking Jess’s blood-caked hand.
I couldn’t help but look away from what seemed like such a private moment. I turned to Cassie, staring on with a raised brow, gently biting her lip to show the first crack in her hard exterior since she’d woken this morning.
Turning back to Jess, I spoke almost under my breath. “Please.”
Jess looked at me, but then away, not settling in my direction.
I watched as Thompson peered around, murmuring into his helmet microphone. The soldier to the right stepped close to Thompson’s side and spoke, leaning to his ear.
“Five minutes to bingo fuel, Sir.”
Thompson nodded, but didn’t say a word as Jess looked to Cassie, then back to Alex before taking the envelope. Dried blood flaked to the ground as she slid her finger under the flap and pulled out a single sheet of paper, concentrating on the words we were desperate to hear.
My darling Jess,
To say I am sorry would not be enough, I know. By now you must have it clear in your mind. Your crazy, super-brain would have easily figured this out and I’m long overdue being honest with you.
I love you.
I know you loved me, but your other life took you away and I couldn’t live without you. For that I am so, so sorry.
You were right all along. It is my medicine. My formula, but not everything I told you was a lie. We found something very special, and it was a gift I wanted to give to you.
I knew you would be a match. I knew you would be the first to overcome the complications.
If you’re reading this, and there is no doubt in my mind that you have survived, then you are a very special person, but not just to me this time, to the world, because you have control over what you have become and, for that, humanity will be forever in your debt.
I need you to come back to me.
I need to show you how you can live like this without the bad parts. I know you understand.
Let these soldiers bring you to me on the Isle of Wight. You will be safe, and you can be by my side forever. Together we can live a new life.
We have much to talk about, much to work through, but I know you will do this for the greater good. That is what you do.
I’m sure you’re angry right now. I know you so well.
I hope you can forgive me.
Toni
P.S. I’m really enjoying having these wonderful children around.
54
LOGAN
Looking past the drying gore, I watched the pain on Jess’s face, despite her obvious struggle to keep her features straight as she read the page for a second time.
Closing her eyes as she came to the end, the moment hung with just the sound of the helicopters in the distance and the tinny, far away voice I thought I could hear from the soldier’s radios.
“I’m going with them,” Jess said, keeping her eyes closed, but stepping toward her, Cassie gave her no time to explain.
“What about the children?” she said, leaning forward looking between Jess and Alex. “What does it say about them? About Ellie?”
Jess didn’t reply; instead, opening her eyes, she glared to Thompson.
Cassie turned to the soldiers and repeated the question. The soldier to Thompson’s left stared at Jess, whilst the one to the right turned his head to peer across the view.
“There’s no real mention.” Jess’s words pulled Cassie to look back.
“What does it say?” I asked, looking to Jess.
“It says I have no choice,” she replied, looking me in the eye.
“No choice but what?” Cassie butted in.
“To go with them.” Jess barely finished the words before Cassie spoke again.
“Where?”
“To wherever Toni is. The woman who did all this.”
“Doctor Lytham?” I said, my eyes bulging. “But that’s where we’re trying to go.”
I couldn’t understand why she didn’t look so much happier and I turned back to Thompson, but with the shake of his head I knew the answer.
“Just Miss Carmichael.”
“Fuck you. You haven’t even asked. Why don’t you get on the radio and find the fuck out,” I said, taking a step to Thompson. As I moved, the soldier at his left dropped his rifle to its strap and drew his handgun, pointing it to my chest.
Feeling a gentle pressure at my shoulder, I held back from taking another step forward. “Doctor Lytham knows us. She gave Cassie here the cure,” I said, glaring to Thompson, but he didn’t react. I turned back, catching Jess’s eye. “Don’t go with them.”
“You always have a choice,” Alex added at my side.
Without saying a word, Jess reached out, handing over the letter with her red fingerprints still on the page.
Not even the gunshot echoing between the buildings could pull me from the words as an icy shiver ran down my spine when I read the final line.
“Go,” I said, catching her eye as I looked up from the white page. “We’ll find you.” I turned to Thompson. His subordinate had stepped back but not holstered his pistol and stared with a blank expression. “Where exactly are you taking her?”
Thompson shook his head. I held my tongue for a moment then looked around, already trying to figure out which way we would start the journey. “We’ll find you.”
“Sir,” the soldier to Thompson’s right spoke, keen to move. As if they’d read my thoughts, the double boom of a Chinook’s blades whipped up the air, sending dust in a swirling chaos around us.
Shadow barked as the left soldier motioned us back through the carpet of bodies and toward the building. When a burst of gunfire called from one of the other groups of soldiers, we ignored his instruction, instead watching as they headed our way, the sniper gone from the roof too.
I could guess the reason they were on the move, racing to fly away and leave us on our own.
With no weapons, and Jess gone too, we’d have no chance.
“Give us a gun. Please,” I shouted over the growing din of rotors and Shadow’s bark, but none of the soldiers reacted to my words. Instead, crowding around Jess, they guided her away then turned their backs as she looked out from between their helmets.
With no choice, together we backed up as I coaxed Shadow with my hand on his neck, glancing at my feet to avoid the debris of bodies and slick chunks of decaying flesh.
It wasn’t long before the sun blotted out with the bulk of the Chinook filling the view as it lowered to land beside the soldier’s protective circle. A vision of the hospital roof sprang to mind, the memory so clear of when Lane fell backwards with the spray of blood. I held my arms wide to stop any of us making that same mistake.
Another shape, an Apache gunship, caught my eye to the side as it sliced through the air with its long round gun at the front following the gunners turn as he swept for targets. I couldn’t help but wonder what his orders would be when Jess was safely spirited away.
I backed us up closer to the building, not caring for the mess down the face of the glass.
Alex saw it first. Then I caught the sight, too.
At the same time, Mandy’s sharp intake of breath told me she was the next to see the spaces between the buildings filling with figures pouncing to the air and at their backs the slow amble of those without souls.
Cassie gave no sign, even as gunshots rattled from the soldiers walking backwards to empty their weapons as they closed up to the protective circle.
“Jess,” Alex called, as the figures covered the distance in the blink of an eye.
Despite the Chinook so close, almost on the ground, sending the downwash of the rotor blades to batter us all, Jess replied.
“Go. Run. Quickly,” she called through the turbulence, reminding me that as soon as they’d taken to the sky, they would leave us behind, unarmed and almost certain to die.
55
JESSICA
I shook my head toward A
lex, not able to battle against the fierce noise whilst trying to hide the desperation at being trapped by Toni once again. If she knew how I felt inside, Alex wouldn’t willingly leave my side.
All I had left was to hope that I could make a difference when I got to where they were taking me, although I knew it was likely she would have planned for every eventuality.
Still, I had no choice but go with them for the sake of the children, for any hope of there being a future for me, forcing down any fear that I could make this entire thing so much worse if I gave Toni what she needed.
But I couldn’t just ignore the fact that once the helicopter landed, it would be over. I would be hers.
Either way, someone else would take the pain and perhaps it wasn’t my decision; maybe fate should have been the one to decide. Startling myself, I realised for the first time I was about to let someone else have control.
With the helicopter coming so close, holding steady in its descent, I spotted the soldiers coming towards us, knowing there were so few left of their number.
The helicopter pivoted around, turning, almost in touching distance so when the wheels hit the ground we could run inside, taking to the air and be gone from this place to safety and to hope I could stop the kids from going through what I had endured.
Toni would show me how to control myself, despite the progress I’d made. She would show me how to stop the hunger altogether and I would have time to think about what to do next. How to take back control. And find Alex again.
56
LOGAN
With the building at our backs no longer able to protect us, I looked instead on the river to our right, remaking the choice I’d hoped we’d avoided. Glancing the other way and toward the pained calls and the wet, wrenching sound of a soldier being ripped apart, I turned away as another stumbled with a creature landing to drag yet more to the ground. There were so many everywhere I looked.