by M Dauphin
At least this time I don’t have to pay for an overweight checked bag.
Shit, I really hope my bag makes it to Colorado after last night’s debacle!
“Ma’am.” The TSA screener motions for me to push my tubs forward and steps me into the x-ray machine.
“This way, ma’am,” the man grunts, escorting me out of the machine.
And this is when the nerves kick in. They take my bag off the conveyor belt and carry it towards me. A woman, about two feet taller than me and resembling something of an Amazonian beast, takes me into a separate room and closes the door, turning on the camera.
“What’s going on?” I ask, eyeing the bag. The only thing on my mind right now is the massive dick in my bag and the worry they’re going to take it from me. I just realized how awesome it is, I can’t lose it now!
“Routine check, ma’am.” The lady sighs. “Arms out.” She nods at me and I oblige, not really wanting to be put on any watch lists today.
After the pat down of the century, I’m told to stand in a small box on the floor while they unload my entire damn bag. Each item they take out is swiped with a certain cloth, then they move to the next. Every piece. The clothes, the laptop… the pink dildo.
I catch her eye as she wipes it and she grins at me, making me shudder inside.
Not entirely certain anything could be more awkward.
“Hey Betsy—” A man, a very gorgeous man, bursts through the door and immediately sees Big Pink in Betsy’s hands and chokes on his words before his eyes flick to mine. “Uh…”
“What do you need, Mark.” Betsy sighs, rolling her eyes as she starts to haphazardly shove items back in my bag.
“Break time,” he manages, trying not to laugh. I clear my throat and when his eyes flash to mine I throw my hands to my hip and raise an eyebrow at him. He nods, then retreats from the room as quickly as he came.
“All good here, doll. Enjoy your trip.” Betsy grins at me and allows me to leave. I head straight for my gate, not slowing as I walk by ‘Mark’ even though I’m certain he tried to stop and talk to me.
“Ava,” I groan into the phone as soon as I get to my gate. “I can’t even begin to explain how awkward that was!”
“Oh my God, Nora!” She cackles, her laugh actually hurting my ear drum. “Jesus girl, you need this vacation.” She sighs and lets out another laugh.
“For fucking real.” I roll my eyes and as she starts talking about plans, I notice myself scanning the crowd, looking for that smile. Max’s smile.
What the hell am I doing? He had an earlier flight than me. Plus, I shouldn’t care where he is right now!
Jesus, that good of a one-night stand isn’t good for anyone’s emotions.
“Ava, I need to find someone to screw this week,” I blurt, interrupting her plans.
“Right, that’s the plan babe.” She chuckles. “I mean, if you can let go of big pink for that long.”
“Shut it. They’re boarding us. I have to hang up.”
“Love you, bitch. See you soon!”
As soon as my phone is slid into my bag they call my boarding number. The line to get on the plane is outrageous, and everyone is as antsy as I am to get to their destination. I’m trying not to worry about Max; whether he made it to his plane and if I’m going to see him anywhere or not, but he’s nowhere to be found. I chuckle and shake my head. Stop thinking last night was any more than it was, Nora. It was a one-night stand. An amazing one-night stand that I need to fuck out of my system.
I can’t be ruined by a mysterious man named Max.
“Ma’am, that’s my seat,” a small old lady says, pointing to the seat I’m currently inhabiting.
“Oh… um,” I say, fumbling with my ticket. I finally get it opened and show it to her. “No, I’m sorry this is on my ticket. What’s yours say?”
She hands me her ticket with shaky hands and I open it, groaning to myself when I see she’s right next to me.
Of course.
“This one’s yours,” I say, pointing to the seat directly next to mine. She thanks me and sits. Shortly after, the lights dim and we’re ready for takeoff.
“So, no husband yet?” The lady whispers, pointing her wrinkly fingers to my hand. I look down at my barren wedding finger and sigh.
“Nope,” I answer just like every time someone asks why I’m not married by now.
“Shame. You’re a pretty girl.” She sighs and takes my hand in hers, cold and clammy. “It’s a shame you’ll dry up before you can even produce a child for some man.”
“Excuse me?” I pull my hand from hers and look at her with astonishment. “That’s none of your business,” I hiss.
She ‘tsks’ and lays her head back in her seat.
“You girls nowadays. Too independent.”
I roll my eyes and shove my earbuds in my ears and close my eyes. Of course I’m going to have the crazy plane neighbor. There’s no reason I should be surprised about this. It’s not like anything else about this trip has gone according to plan, anyway.
By the time the plane lands I’ve napped a total of a half hour. The bumps and jolts along the way always make me jumpy and I didn’t take my usual Benadryl before this flight so it was harder for me to fall asleep.
I’m waiting in baggage claim when I hear her.
“Nora!” Ava’s squeal echoes throughout the busy terminal and a smile immediately graces my face.
“Babe!” I spin and open my arms just in time for her to barrel into me. “Oh God, it’s been too long.”
“I know,” she mumbles into my shoulder. Squeezing me tighter than usual, I have to pry her off just to get a breath in.
“So, let’s get your shit and go!” She rubs her hands together as I admire my best friend. Blonde waves fall from her messy bun. She’s wearing her sunglasses inside and her face looks flushed.
“You okay, hun?”
She scans the carousel as the alarm goes off, waiting for my bag.
“Perfect,” she chirps. “What’s your bag look like?”
“Black,” I answer. “A green strap going around it.” Her behavior is normally a little off kilter when I first arrive, but this time it’s just not her.
Something’s going on with her.
“Perfect.” She huffs and walks forward to grab it as it slides down the belt. “Let’s go.” She carries it with ease and I follow her to her jeep, tossing everything in the back before sliding into the front seat.
She starts the jeep, silently, and starts on her way back to her house.
“So, when are you going to tell me what the fuck is up?”
“Everything’s fine, Nora. Chill.” She flashes me her brilliant smile and I growl.
“It’s not,” I reach over and pull the sunglasses off her face as we sit at a red light.
The red puffy eyes that meet me, not covered in a lick of makeup, aren’t anything like the Ava I know. “Oh, sweetie, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she whispers, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel.
“Ava, I’ve known you almost twenty years. You can’t hide shit from me. I think I know when something’s wrong with my best friend.”
I watch her, waiting.
She takes a breath and shakes her head, pulling her sunglasses back down over her eyes.
“I lost my job, Nor,” she whispers. “A few weeks ago. I thought I’d find something but this morning I was turned down for yet another position and I’m about to lose the apartment too.”
“Jesus, Ava! That’s something you’re supposed to talk to me about!”
“Yea, well you have so much going on I didn’t want you stressing. I’ve lost jobs in the past and had no problem finding something else. This one, though… Matt kind of ruined me finding another job in the area.”
I roll my eyes, wanting nothing more than to pummel this Matt character into the ground.
Matt. The CEO of the marketing firm she worked for. They’d been fucking for months, but I guess when thi
ngs go sour the low man on the totem pole is the one that’s going to suffer the worst.
“He can’t fire you because you don’t want to screw him anymore, Ava.”
“No,” she huffs. “But they can downsize the company. I was no longer ‘needed’ as an employee.”
“Can’t you file for unemployment?”
“I wasn’t there long enough.”
I roll my eyes and shake my head at her, biting my tongue and not saying what I really want to say.
Like ‘how about you try getting a job and not fucking the boss’ or ‘this is why we don’t mix work and play’. None of that will make her feel better.
“I need out of this place,” she says, pulling onto her street.
“Come to Oklahoma with me,” I blurt before my brain knows what I’m really doing.
“What?” She shrieks, looking over at me as she pulls into her driveway.
“I mean… why not? What’s here that you would miss?”
“The dick. Colorado has good dick.” She shrugs.
“I’m sure Oklahoma does too, Ava.”
“You’re serious?”
“Why not? The guest house I’ll be living in is small, but once we’re on our feet we can get our own apartment. It would be a blast!”
And I mean it. It’ll be an awesome time.
“What would I do for a job though?” Her eyebrows furrow in confusion.
“I mean… I can’t pay much but you can always help out with the boutique.” I shrug.
“Really?!” She shrieks.
“Sure, pending everything goes well with it.”
“Oh God, Nora that’d be amazing! I promise you won’t regret it.”
I sure hope not.
6 months later
“Same time next week?” I ask, shoving the bills into my back pocket. Shuffling my feet, I take a drag of my cigarette and pretend to care about the shit happening around me. College never was my style, but it happens to be where I do the most of my business so I have to put up with it. The kids in this school are here on mommy and daddy’s dime and have enough of it to go around so of course I’m going to drop shop here. Anyone in my situation that hasn’t thought of it is just a dumbass.
“Yea, yea, man.” Bryce nods. “You going tonight?”
“The rave?” I ask, chuckling. “Nah. I got shit to do.” The last thing I need is to be in a scene like that again. I’m good where I am.
“Right.” He nods, staring at the ground.
“I’ll see ya later, man,” I clap him on the shoulder and save him the awkward goodbye he was headed towards. I don’t do this to make friends. I do this to make money, plain and simple. Deig and I started this side business a few years back, and other than a few small setbacks, we’ve grown to be the main source of extra curricular… aid… in the entire state. So large that every couple of months I have to leave the country to get more stock because we run through it so fast. It’s not just college kids either. You wouldn’t believe the amount of stay-at-home moms that have a dependency on Xanax. It’s scary, really, the thought of all these zombie moms out there driving their kids to school, but I’ve seen what they can be like without it and I’d rather have calm, cool, collected any day compared to crazy fucking psycho.
I head to my truck, ignoring the calls from a small group of pre-teens just outside the college. These kids aren’t dumb. They know I won’t step foot near the high school, so the idiots skip class to try and cut me off here. I’m not fucking stupid. I don’t sell to teenagers.
Not fucking under-aged kids.
Eighteen and over, and you’ve got my business.
“Man, what took you so long?” Deig grumbles from the passenger seat as I slide in my truck and buckle the seatbelt.
“Business, bro.” I start the truck and the low rumble of the diesel comes to life.
“You know this truck is ruining the atmosphere.”
“Yep.” I back out of my spot and pull away before those asshole high school kids make their way over to me.
“And you don’t care?”
“Deig, do I look like the type of guy to care about that shit? Pansy fucking shit?”
“Not pansy, you fucker. You could drive the same fucking places in a more economically friendly vehicle.”
I let out a bark of laughter and slap him on the shoulder as I wait for the light to turn green. Deig and I are childhood friends. He’s really the only friend I had growing up. He was there for me through everything, and even after I was thrown into the system and jumped from house to house, he was always there for me. Granted, we’re cut from two totally different cloths, but we each put up with each other.
Foster homes turned me into an uncaring, using man who honestly doesn’t give two fucks whether what I’m doing is ‘morally right’ or not. I’m a compulsive, live-in-the-moment type of guy.
Deig on the other hand, is a man who will ask questions first… plenty of them… and then make his most educated decision possible, about three days later. He’s the type of person you want to run a business with. We’re polar opposites, hence why we work so damn well together.
“Those damn whiny engines are nothing compared to the rumble of this baby,” I croon, petting the dashboard as we head for the outskirts of the city.
I just bought this thing a month or so ago and I’m still very much in love with my truck. I worked hard for it and paid for it in cash. I’ve never thought I’d be able to fall in love, but this truck just about makes me a believer.
We’re heading for a business meeting at a high class restaurant tonight. The client wants something ‘new’ and ‘fresh’.
“When you think we’re going to be able to quit this little illegal charade we’re putting on, Max?” Deig asks, not making eye contact with me.
“What the hell do you mean?”
“I mean, the business is doing fine without us having to supplement the checkbook with all the drugs. You ever thought maybe there’s going to come a time when we need to focus on our future and staying out of jail?”
“Deig, dude.” I chuckle. “Have we ever got caught?”
“No.” He sighs. “It’s just so fucking nerve wracking. You making another trip up to Canada next week, so fucking close to your last one… don’t you think they’re going to notice?”
“Do you want to stop doing this? We can stick to graphics,” I say, shrugging, pulling into the parking lot.
“No,” he grumbles. “I really fucking love the money.” He lets out a laugh and sighs. “Shit, man. I just don’t want you going to jail.”
“You’re just being a fucking pansy. Stop worrying, I got all this under control.”
“You bring the portfolio for tonight?” He raises his eyebrow at me, knowing full well my tendency to forget shit.
“Right behind my seat.” I grin and reach around to grab it.
The meeting goes as usual. Being a younger company, these older businesses think they need to walk us through how to market and promote their brand. It only takes a few minutes of talk from Deig giving his famous speech for them to realize we know what the fuck we’re doing. He’s a pro at it, where if I were to open my big mouth it wouldn’t come out right and they probably wouldn’t hire us. Deig is the people person in this job; I’m not. I can make your business fucking shine like a goddamned star, even if you sell dog shit, but I don’t want to deal with you personally. These men tonight aren’t any different than normal. A job like this is one that Deig and I’ve done plenty of times in the past. Men wanting their business to be bigger and better and not having a clue on how to market it.
That’s where we come in. From re-vamping their website, to creating their logo; we make their image look like something people want to be included in. We also take their business global by creating their social media presence, something many of these old men know nothing about.
Smudge Design has been ours for the past three years and in those years we’ve learned a ton. Just the two of us, no employees,
no office, no one to report to; it’s amazing. It gets old at times like when the people outsourcing us want to try to run the show but know nothing of what they’re doing, but most days it’s pretty fucking fantastic. I get to work at home in my underwear. Not many people can say that.
“Thanks again,” the man, Russ, smiles and sticks out his hand. I take it and smile, shaking firmly.
“We’ll have something to you in about a week or so.”
“I’m looking forward to it.” His handshake is tight, trying to send the message that he’s power, but it doesn’t rattle me. I’ll do the job, I’ll get their money, and I will have zero fucks to give whether or not they like me. As long as they like the job I finish for them, that’s all that matters to me.
Deig walks them to their car while I head for my truck. I’ll let him be the personable one tonight. I’m too damn tired to schmooze for much longer. I walk to the side of the building and light a cigarette, waiting for Deig to finish up business. Each drag melts a bit of the day’s stress off my shoulders. I really need to find a new fucking swap spot; those teenagers are going to get us all in trouble one day.
Standing there, minding my own business, a beamer whips into the parking lot and damn near clips my truck.
“Jesus, man!” I bellow, arms out pointing towards the massive diesel he couldn’t have ‘not seen’. The man smiles at me and gives me a wave from the driver seat before stepping out. Fucking prick.
And that’s when my eyes flick to the girl in the passenger seat and my heart stops.
Those eyes.
I know those eyes.
Right?
“Hey man, come on. I want to get back to change before going out tonight.” Deig brings me out of my trance, slapping me on the back and pushing me forward, forcing my feet to move.
Those fucking blue eyes.
“Dude, you okay?” He looks at me confused and shakes his head. “You see a ghost or something?”