by Remi Grey
Why would he think to include me as a player when it comes to women? You’d think he know me better than that. I guess I was wrong. Maybe I’m the one to blame here but I’ll take accountability. I have no clue how to fix this.
Chapter 6
Kara
I heard what happened last night and I feel awful. I feel responsible for getting James into this and breaking up a perfectly good friendship.
James and I made an agreement that we wouldn’t feel sorry for having feelings for each other but it’s much easier said than done. I know my brother comes from a good place, but it just eats me up that a friendship is ruined over something so ridiculous.
As I’m sitting in the stands watching the game between their team and the Charlotte Magic, I can sense the tension on the basketball court between James and Larry.
Instead of taking their aggression out on the other team, they take it out on each other with Larry hogging the ball acting as if James isn’t open to pass the ball to. James raises a fuss because he knows that Larry is purposely ignoring him.
The coach is beyond frustrated and makes it a point to tell the men that they both need to leave personal business at home. The whole team is starting to get stressed out by the behaviors of these two.
By the end of the third quarter, Larry’s put out of the game and on the sidelines until he gets his head back in the game.
The Cleveland Bullets end up getting another win, but this was barely a win if two friends are losing a war.
Neither Larry or James have any idea that I was in the stands watching the game, so I decide to head back to my hotel quietly without being discovered. I already know what Larry will say to me and I am not sure that I want to hear it.
I am going to let him approach me if he wants to speak about this, but I will not bring it up to him because there is no need for me to. As far as James...well, I’ll give him some much needed space. I personally hate confrontation but it’s something that has to be done, just not now.
The next day, Larry calls me to say exactly what I thought he might say. When he calls, I didn’t show any signs of knowing what went on between him and James.
In fact, I think I played it cool...too cool. He keeps a pleasant, calm tone but claims to know what went on between James and I which leads me to believe that James may have told him the truth finally.
I would rather not discuss my love life, so I choose not to confirm it or answer any of Larry’s digging questions like how long have we been seeing each other or what happened to listening to him?
I simply tell him politely what James, the rest of the family, and I have been trying to tell him along— to politely fuck off. It isn’t his business to know so I don’t tell him. What I do tell him is that James is a kind soul whom I got to know and that I like him. I tell Larry not to ruin it for me.
If that isn't what Larry wants to hear then I’m not sure what is. I end the conversation by telling him that I love him, but James is not like other men I’ve dated.
Chapter 7
James
I’m awakened early by Kara tossing and turning in her sleep next to me in bed. When she finally wakes completely, she has tears welling up in her eyes.
I try to calm her down, but she is not easy to console.
“What’s wrong? You had a nightmare?” I ask, comforting her.
“Something like that.” She sniffles and looks around the room as if she is trying to avoid eye contact with me. “
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask trying to move my head to see her eyes.
Still looking down, Kara says, “This is going to sound silly, but I had a dream that we were both asleep and you had your arm around me. Then I woke up and you were gone. Nowhere to be found.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” I assure her. I’m not sure how to respond to her because I am not really used to women telling me about their strong feelings, so I just prefer to listen rather than talk.
“I know you won’t leave me, but I just can’t get this situation out of my mind. My stress level is through the roof. I just want to be together without all the worry,” she says, wiping teardrops from her cheeks.
I know what subject she is about to bring up and I would rather avoid it but it won’t get addressed that way.
“I know you don’t want to talk about it but my brother called me yesterday and I felt like he was trying to dissuade me from being with you. It’s like he wants to paint this picture of you like you are a bad guy who has every intention of hurting me. And I know it's far from the truth, but I feel like I can't live my life comfortably anymore without being tormented by brother dearest.” Explaining this to me, she sounds ticked off. I, for one, think she should just either stand up to Larry or distance herself a bit if he's not supportive but that is not my call. If anything bad happens to their brother-sister relationship I don’t want to be responsible for it.
“You remember the reason we had to leave each other the first time?” she asks.
“Your brother never wanted us to be together, let alone be friends with each other. We also had different jobs in separate places. We were all too busy and wanted different things out of life,” I say, trying to take all the weight off of Larry.
“You’re right. I guess I can’t blame it all on Larry the first time. Your career and my schooling played a big part of it. I just don’t want history to repeat itself, you know? I don’t want us to part ways just because I have school to go back to and you have to resume your career. If we are really meant to be together nothing should get in the way of that. It's why I’m dreading having to go back home tomorrow,” she says.
“School is important, Kara,” I explain to her. “What are you trying to say?” What could she possibly have against college?
“I know it’s important, but I feel like there’s more to life than college. I’m missing out. Before you say anything, I haven’t told anyone that I wasn’t interested in college anymore because my mom won’t understand, and Larry would probably kill me. I am not as passionate about nursing as I once was. The spark is gone, and I'd rather pursue other things.” She pauses and looks at me. “Most importantly, because I feel this way it wouldn’t matter if I was to stay here in town or leave. I’m not sure what to do. I would feel guilty leaving knowing that there is a mess down here that I am probably responsible for that needs cleaning up.”
Once again, I’m not sure how to comfort her other than hold her and reiterate that she is in charge of her own life. We can always keep in touch, but I am confused myself about what to do. Larry has always had my back and I don’t want to keep feeling like I’m betraying him. My head tells me one thing the heart says another.
Damn, I hate being a hopeless romantic.
So far, days have gone by and Larry and I have barely said one word to each other. When I did try to initiate an apology to him in the locker room, he told me I could shove it and that I was only interested in preying on his younger sister because she was too naive to know any better. I felt there was nothing more to say so I nodded my head with a slight, “okay,” and that was the last thing we said to each other.
Chapter 8
Kara
“Will you at least talk to him? He’s your best friend,” I follow Larry down the hallway not accepting no for an answer. I decided to pay Larry a surprise visit to his home when I heard the news about him not talking to James. It may not be my place to talk to him about it but I just thought I’d mention it. After all, if it means a lot to me then I know it matters to Larry. I managed to speak with him before he had to leave for a meeting even if it was a quick talk in the hallway in front of his front door.
“I am not going to repeat myself,” Larry answers back.
“Why not? Is it because of me?” I ask, needing to know.
Larry stops in his tracks and turns around to face me. “No Kara. In my eyes you can do no wrong, except ignore my wishes for you. I only wanted you to be happy and not get hurt by men who only care abo
ut money, parties, and groupies but you have made it clear to me that you do not care for my opinion. You’ll just go and do your own thing.” He starts walking away again but I refuse to let him make me feel guilty.
“Have you ever once asked me what I want?” I ask loudly while staying put.
He looks around and says, “what do you want?”
“I just want to be happy. You can’t shield me from every danger in life. I just want to live. I like James. He’s a great guy and you’re going to have to deal with that. Neither Me nor James wanted any of this to go down like it did. We care for you, but we would like your support too.”
“The both of you will not have my support,” Larry butted in.
“You’ve already lost your best friend. Is it worth losing me over, too? Get your head out of your ass and see what’s in front of you and stop trying to isolate me or you’re going to be lonely yourself.” I’m not sure where that came from, but Larry looks at me as if he’s just seen a ghost. I don't want to see the look on his face any longer, so I leave him standing in the middle of the hallway all alone.
I exit his house and leave to pay James a visit to try to clear up the air.
I already know what is going to happen after today. Larry is going to eventually accept me and James’ relationship out of fear of losing us. I am one hundred percent sure about this.
I know Larry like the back of my hand. When he thinks, he actually thinks long and hard. I feel like I’ve done what I could to turn this bad situation into something more understandable. I feel like I have actually accomplished something. Hopefully, James doesn’t have to worry because progress has been made to mend his broken friendship. He, on the other hand, doesn’t see it that way.
“This whole situation is exhausting. I really don’t want to think about or put much energy into it. Just face the fact that Larry will never accept us being together and leave it at that. I’ll always have feelings for you. You’re a beautiful, smart woman but it's just not going to work out.” Unbelievable. I can’t believe how stubborn and stupid James is being.
“So that’s it? You’re just going to leave me high and dry? I get it, James. Maybe you lost a best friend in the process, but I would at least like to think that I’ve gained one: you.” My eyes start to well up with tears that I am trying to hold back.
“Kara-” James starts.
“Just stop it.” At this point the tears came on their own and my voice starts to break. “I’m willing to sacrifice a relationship with my brother only for you to feel obligated to leave me? You want me to just pack up and go, don’t you?”
I doubt James knows what to do under these circumstances when a female he really likes is crying but he does seem to be trying his best to calm me down again by holding me.
“I don’t want you to just pack up and go, Kara. I want us to be together as much as you do but it’s not easy to make a decision like this.” He resumes helping me to pack my bags. “I’m sorry. You have been a good friend to me, but I don’t want you to have to sacrifice your brother for me. I have morals, you know?”
“I know that but what you failed to realize is that we both said my brother’s opinion didn’t matter yet here we are arguing about it when we knew what was coming the whole time. The hypocrisy at play here.”
I walk to the nearest corner of the room with my back turned against James waiting for him to come and comfort me. It takes him about three minutes while I try to get myself together.
“You know what? You’re absolutely right. I know it can’t be easy for you to deal with your brother and me fighting over you constantly. It’s selfish of me to not see that. If you’re willing to work through this then I am. too. We’ll work it out.” James stands behind me like he wants to grab me but doesn’t want me to pull away. I look at the ground then I look back up at him.
“We’ll work it out?” I ask him in my baby voice sounding hopeful for once in my life.
“Yeah, we’ll work it out.” He hugs me from the back and gives me a tight bear hug. “I promise.”
“Does this mean that I can stay?” I ask, hoping to get an honest answer out of him.
“That’s up to you,” he answers.
“Do you want me to stay?” I ask. looking at him curiously, almost afraid the answer might not be what I want it to be.
“Yes. Just make sure it’s what you want to do,” he replies lovingly. “Think it over some more and let me know.”
I reach for James’ face and give him a long, hard kiss. He picks me up in response until his cell phone starts ringing. He puts me down and takes it out of his pocket. “I’m sorry, I gotta take this.” He walks into the other room to talk.
While he is on the phone, I decide to utilize phone time too. I call my mother up and ask her how she’s been. She’s slowly getting to that age where she needs constant reminding to do some things. She senses something in my voice and asks me what’s wrong.
My mother is the type of person that if she asks you what's wrong, she knows that something is wrong and will insist that you tell her. I tell her about my overbearing brother once more as if she hasn’t heard about it a dozen times. She lets me know that he came to see her today and he took her shopping and they had a little talk. He brought up the subject with her and she spoke to him about it one on one.
She told me the story of when our father passed away, Larry started becoming my caretaker in place of him. She assured me that she told him that he did a damn good job of equipping me for adulthood because of it but there is only so much he could do now that I am older.
She mentions he went out for a walk by himself after they spoke. Knowing Larry, he doesn’t go out for night walks unless something is weighing really heavy on his mind which is confirmation to me that I was right all along. Everything will be okay now. Larry just has to come to his senses.
I wait for James to arrive back in the room for about forty-five minutes. I walk to the living room to see what’s keeping him. As I suspected, he’s off the phone and asleep on the couch. So much for makeup sex.
Chapter 9
James
The next morning, I wake up to a phone call from someone I thought would never come around: Larry. At first, I prepare for the worst because Kara and I had been together yesterday, so I wonder if it was related.
I ignored the first phone call because I had been too stressed out for the past couple of weeks. When the phone went to voicemail the first time, I received a text from him stating, “do you want to hang out or not?”
Once I saw that I felt a sense of dread and relief at the same time. I didn’t want to talk about the subject but at least Larry wanted to talk to me. I found relief in the fact that maybe he found his peace and if I was going to talk about it, I could do it openly instead of having to hide or spare someone’s feelings. Only time would tell until I met him for breakfast downtown.
When I finally arrive at our spot, I find Kara sitting at a table. “Aren’t you supposed to be headed home right now?” I ask her, in shock that she is still in town. I know we talked about it yesterday, but I at least thought she would be headed home to work out arrangements or to retrieve her belongings.
“I was getting ready to head out, but Larry invited me to breakfast this morning, so I cancelled my flight. What are you doing here?” she asks, looking around.
“He invited me too,” I reply.
“See, I told you things would work out,” she says me with an ‘I-told-you-so’ look on her face.
“Just because he invited us here doesn’t mean that all is well yet,” I tell her.
“James you’re supposed to be his best friend and you don’t know better than that?” she says staring at her menu.
“The Larry I know has proven himself to be a very spontaneous, bipolar guy. Anything can happen.” She shrugs off what I say to her and we both look around to find Larry approaching.
“Whatever you do, act normal,” Kara says with a sly grin on her face that turns into a serious f
ace when Larry sits down with us.
“Now, I know you are both wondering why I brought the both of you here today. If you think I am perfectly fine with you two seeing each other, don’t push it. I know that I have been a piece of work lately, but I have good reason.”
He turns to me to give me a serious blank look. “James, you know I don’t want to see my sister hurt in any way, shape, or form. If you so much as hurt her, I will kill you. If you so much as send her the wrong flowers, I will kill you. If you so much as-”
“I got it, Larry. I got it. I have no intentions of hurting her,” I assure him with the same expression he is giving me. Kara starts to heartily laugh.