Chapter 33
Toby
I sat at the edge of the bed. Though sleeping, Victoria clung to my hand, and I dabbed her forehead with a damp cloth. She continued flailing around, muttering.
"Is this supposed to happen?"
Gessilyn frowned. "Everyone reacts differently. Her memories are flooding back through dreams."
"How much longer is she going to have to endure this?" I dabbed her forehead some more.
"As long as it takes."
Killian, Gessilyn's husband, came in with a tray of food in each hand. He handed one to her and one to me. "Eat up."
"Thanks, but I have no appetite."
"All the more reason to eat." He sat next to Gessilyn and pulled some of his dark hair behind his ears.
I glanced back over at Victoria. It seemed cruel to eat while she was obviously suffering in her sleep. I took a bite, anyway. Killian was right. I needed my strength in case—no, when—Victoria woke. Who knew what the flood of memories would do to her?
She would remember dying in my arms at the hand of my father. Then she would remember returning to life, and whatever had happened in death and also her time with the jaguars before starting school.
"Did anyone ever figure out what's going on with the wolf outside?" Killian asked.
"Poor thing probably needs a pack," Gessilyn said.
I swallowed a bite of chicken. "He probably sensed us while we were in our wolf form. I'm not worried about him."
Victoria sat up, eyes wide, gasping for air.
I nearly dropped my tray of food, but managed to set it on the end of the bed. Gessilyn moved it to the table near her.
"Victoria," I whispered, taking her hand.
She turned to me, her face pale. The way she stared at me, it was like she didn't recognize me.
"It's me. Toby." I squeezed her hand gently.
Victoria continued studying me.
"You're safe, sweetness. We're here in my home and I'm going to take care of you."
She looked around the room, her eyes darting about erratically.
"Did you remember the past?" I pulled some hair from her eyes.
"Her memories might not have caught up with the present," Gessilyn said.
I kissed Victoria's palm. "Do you need anything? We've got some food."
She turned back to me. "Your father…"
My stomach sank. I knew where this was going. "Yes?"
"He, he killed me." She threw herself into my arms, burying her face into my chest.
I rubbed her back, a lump growing in my throat. "I know. I alone buried you."
She sobbed, soaking my shirt with her sweet tears.
"I wish I could take it all back."
Victoria shook her head. "Don't wish it away."
"What do you mean?"
"I had no other choice but to run from my father. He flew off the handle, insisting I marry Franklin early. It was either stay and endure them my entire life or risk leaving to spend my life with you. The short time we had was worth it."
"You never told me about that."
She clung to me. "I never had time because I needed to get away."
I took a deep breath, trying to make sense of it all. "He wanted you to marry Franklin right away?"
Victoria sat back and nodded, holding my gaze. "Elsie went to a school dance with a boy from her class. Father found out, and he killed her in front of me." Her eyes filled with tears and they poured down her face. Her lips trembled and she shook.
It broke my heart to see her in such pain. I held her close and rubbed her back. "I'm so sorry, sweetness. I never knew."
She sobbed, and finally sat up and took a deep breath. "Th-then he said he would put a stop to the family's rebellion, starting by forcing me to quit school and marry Franklin. That's when I fled to you."
"It all makes sense now."
Her eyes shone with tears again. "I know. It was all my fault."
I shook my head. "No, it was your father's. And my father's. All we wanted was to be together, but their stubbornness and old ways prevented that."
Gessilyn came over and sat on the other side of Victoria. "I know you've just been through so much, but do you remember everything?"
"I know Toby tried to save me. He did everything he could."
Gessilyn put her hand on Victoria's. "I don't doubt that. What I mean is, do you remember anything after that?"
Victoria glanced up, looking deep in thought. "No, I don't think so. Why?"
"The spell is going to keep working until you recall everything, and I want to stay here until it completes its course."
"Okay." Victoria leaned against me, shaking.
I wrapped my arms around her. "I'm really sorry you have to deal with all this."
"Do you remember anything about why your memories were wiped?" Gessilyn asked.
Victoria shook her head.
"It's coming. You should eat." She reached for the tray I'd eaten from and handed it to Victoria. "You'll need the nourishment."
"She's right," I urged. The next round of memories might even be worse—it was too hard to say. There was no telling what had happened to make her forget everything. Had it been a spell? Or had she experienced something so traumatic, her mind could do nothing else except block it all out?
Either way, we were sure to find out soon.
Victoria nodded and picked up the fork.
I couldn't help fearing what might be found. She'd kissed both me and that vile jaguar after drinking the tonic. A part of me kept asking the question I didn't want to think about—what if something had changed, and he was her one true love now?
A lump formed in my throat. I wasn't sure that was something I could deal with. I'd lived without her all these years, and now that I had her back, could I let go? I might not have a choice.
She handed the empty tray back to Gessilyn. "Thanks. I'm feeling sleepy now."
My pulse drummed in my ears.
Gessilyn spoke to Victoria, but I couldn't hear a word. All I could think about was whether or not Victoria would still love me when she woke up.
She lay down and pulled the covers up, her eyelids starting to close.
I leaned over and brushed my lips across hers. "I'm not leaving your side. When you wake up, I promise to be here."
Her eyes closed. "I love you, Toby."
"And I love you, forever and for always."
Please remember that.
Chapter 34
Toby
"Get something to eat," Gessilyn urged. "I won't take my eyes off her. I promise."
I glanced down at Victoria. She seemed to be sleeping peacefully, and had been for a while. "Do you think she's remembering anything else?"
Gessilyn put a hand on my shoulder. "It's possible. She could also just be recovering from such an emotional trauma."
"Trauma? That seems like a strong word, don't you think?"
"She just recalled her death, and not just that, but her sister's, too."
I frowned. "True. I can't imagine what it's like to go from remembering almost nothing to having all that flood back."
Gessilyn squeezed my shoulder. "But now you two can move forward together. I know how long you've wanted this."
"And how badly." I leaned over and brushed my lips across Victoria's. Then I turned to Gessilyn. "The moment she wakes, let me know."
"You have my word."
Relief swept through me, and I realized how hungry I was. "Do you want anything?"
She shook her head. "I ate not long ago. You can send Killian up, though."
"Sure thing." I rose from the chair. "Thanks again for everything, Gessilyn."
"Don't thank me yet."
I arched a brow.
"Not until I've figured out how to break the curse of the moon."
My heart nearly broke in two.
"What's going to happen to her if she doesn't shift?" Gessilyn sat in the chair.
I shook my head, not wanting to talk about it.
"I need to know what I'm dealing with."
"The truth is, I can only speculate. Maybe she'll lose the ability to shift, or maybe she'll finally shift into the wolf and never return to this state."
She gave me a sympathetic glance. "I sense another or coming."
I frowned and then whispered, "She could die again—worst case scenario."
Gessilyn jumped up from the chair. "We're not going to let that happen. Do you hear me?"
I nodded, not trusting my voice.
"Toby, I'm serious. I won't let that happen. I'll move in here and work day and night if I have to. The jaguars have found a way around the curse. So can I, and I will."
"Thanks, Gessilyn." My voice cracked. "If anyone can, it's you."
"Darn straight. In fact, while you're eating, I'm going to call my parents. They've been around longer than me. Surely, one of them can think of something I've never heard of."
"I can't tell you how much I appreciate it." I glanced at Victoria. "I'd do anything for her."
"That's why I'm going to put in everything I've got into this."
"And if you ever need anything from me…"
She pulled out her phone and waved me away. "Just get something to eat. Or just talk with your guys. You need a break."
It was hard to pull myself away from Victoria, but Gessilyn was right. I needed to think.
I went downstairs. Everyone was gathered in the kitchen.
"How's it going, sir?" Brick asked, standing from his seat.
"She's still sleeping, and she doesn't seem to be having any bad dreams."
Relief swept over his face. "I'm so glad to hear it."
Soleil jumped up from her spot next to him. "Me, too. Is there anything we can do?"
"I just need to clear my head."
"There's nothing like a good meal to help with that." Brick spread his arm toward the table, which held enough to feed our pack right before shifting. "I can also put some roast beef in the oven."
"This is fine." I took my usual seat and filled the plate.
"How's Gessilyn?" Killian asked.
"She wants you to go upstairs and sit with her."
He finished up his drink and turned to me. "I'm really glad Victoria remembers you."
"Me, too." I dug into my food. My emotions were too raw, and I didn't want anyone to see them.
Everyone spoke around me. I was grateful for the distraction as I listened to them discussing possible cures for the curse of the moon.
Once I'd finally had my fill, I glanced around the table. Each member of my pack took a turn giving me a reassuring expression.
Strength filled me, replacing my aching emotions. My family had my back and the high witch was deeply invested in fully restoring Victoria to her natural state. And the best news of all was that Victoria remembered me and our time together before her death.
We had each other, and that was something I'd desired for so long. Too long.
The love of my life was now back with all of her memories. We were together once again—really together. And with Gessilyn working on curing the moon's curse, that left me with only the worry of when and how to give her to the proper proposal. Now we had nothing standing in our way of getting married and running the pack together.
I glanced around the table. Everyone was joking and laughing, blissfully unconcerned with the vampire or the valkyrie sitting with us. Brick, especially, seemed pleased with Soleil's presence. He was grinning wider than I'd ever seen as she shared a story about an unfortunate encounter with a pharaoh's daughter.
Killian came over to me. "Victoria's starting to wake."
My heart leaped into my throat. I jumped from my seat and bolted up the stairs.
Chapter 35
Victoria
I squeezed Toby's hand as Moonhaven came into sight. The sun sat behind it, creating a show of bright pinks and oranges against the darkening sky.
He turned to me and took my other hand in his, gazing into my eyes. "Have I told you how happy I am to have you back?"
"One or two hundred times," I teased. "But I can't hear it too much. Not after everything we've been through. I wish I could remember why I forgot everything."
Toby pulled me closer. "It doesn't matter. The only thing that does matter is that we're together now."
My heart fluttered. "I couldn't ask for anything more. Deep down, I missed you horribly. I just didn't understand it."
He stepped closer and brushed his lips across mine. "That's because our love is too powerful for a memory loss. What we have goes deeper than memories. It reaches into the depths of our emotions. It's part of who we are. You're as much a part of my soul as I am. Without you at my side, I was only half a wolf—half a man. You make me whole."
My mouth gaped and tears filled my eyes, pooling and blurring my vision. "You… you're equally part of me. I just can't say it as eloquently now that you've melted me with your words." I blinked, causing tears to spill.
He wiped them away and held my gaze. "There's only one thing I need to be fully complete."
"What?"
Toby stepped back and knelt on the grass.
My heart rate sped up.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a diamond ring. "I've never loved anyone more than you, Victoria. Even your death couldn't keep my feelings at bay. You're the most important person in my life, and I couldn't be happier to have you back—and remembering me, no less."
I laughed and wiped new tears from my eyes. My knees wobbled, so I lowered myself to the ground, also.
Toby took my left hand. "I want nothing more than to lead this pack with you. I love you, Victoria. Will you marry me?"
"Yes! We've waited too long for this." I laughed while more tears ran from my eyes.
Smiling, he slid the ring on my finger. It was a perfect fit.
"You've just made me the happiest man alive." He beamed.
"But you can't be any happier than I am." I wiped my tears away.
"I beg to differ." Toby pulled me onto his lap and pressed his mouth on mine. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him greedily, excited about our future together. After all these years, we would finally get married—and this time, there was no one around to stop us.
Will they be able to break the curse of the moon? Find out in the Fall of 2016!
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Read Gessilyn's story, and get the background on Toby's search for Victoria:
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Other Books
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The Transformed Main Series
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Author's Note
Thanks so much for reading Lost Wolf. This book has been a long time in the making. Ever since Toby's role in my Transformed series lessened, I've received numerous emails asking for more of him. Unfortunately, his place in the series had mostly dwindled down as that world exploded, going in some directions I never imagined.
I've been excited to write his story. Not only is he one of my favorite characters, but I'm excited that so many of you love him, also! I really hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. As with the previous series, I have no exact plan as to how many books there will be (I like to see where the stories go on their own) but there will be at least four!
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Lost Wolf (Curse of the Moon Book 1) Page 22