Reeva gestured over her shoulder to the green, insulated lunch box and tall, stainless steel thermos she’d placed on a serving cart. “All ready. I put in extra cookies today. You look like you need them.”
Cookies were the last thing she needed, but she’d give them to Sawyer. Since they’d started working together, she’d learned he could eat two whole lunches at once and never gain an ounce. “Thanks. And quit worrying. You’ll get gray hairs that way.”
“Hmmp,” she snorted. “In case you haven’t noticed my hair is already gray. And worrying over this family is my job. Especially when it comes to Maureen.”
The mention of her mother caused Vivian to pause. “Mom? What’s there to worry about with her? She hasn’t been ill.”
Reeva put down her chopping knife and leveled a stern look at her. “There’s something not right with your mother. She won’t tell me what it is, but something is darn sure eating at her. I can see it on her face when she thinks no one is looking. And I can see she’s hiding it from you kids.”
Vivian could usually spot when something was off with her mother. But if Maureen was purposely trying to hide her worries, that was another matter.
“I hope you’re wrong, Reeva. Mom works so hard and she has a lot on her mind. Could be she’s like you, concerned about Katherine’s health.”
Reeva shook her head. “No, this started months ago. After she started digging through those old ranch records and found one of your dad’s notebooks.”
Vivian recalled her brothers discussing the content of the notebook. The gist of it being that Joel had scheduled a meeting with a cattle buyer in Phoenix on the day following his death; however, no one in the family had recognized the name. Joe had used his resources at the sheriff’s department to search for the man’s identity, but nothing had showed up. Which most likely meant the name had been an alias. Maureen hadn’t seemed upset about the development. Instead, Vivian had gotten the impression she was hopeful.
“I’ll talk with her when I get a chance,” Vivian assured the cook.
Reeva threw up her hands. “Don’t you dare mention anything about the notebook! She’ll clam right up!”
“All right, I’ll be very subtle. Right now I have to run!”
Grabbing up the thermos and lunch box, she hurried out the kitchen door and in the process very nearly crashed head-on into Hannah.
“Oh, Mom, thank goodness I caught you before you left for work!”
She latched a steadying hold on her daughter’s arm, while noticing the girl still had to change her clothes and brush her hair before she left for the school bus stop. “What it is, honey? I’m running behind this morning and it looks like you are, too.”
“Will you take me and Nick Christmas shopping tonight? Aunt Kat doesn’t feel like going and Uncle Blake is too busy. We need to buy gifts for our teachers and a few of our best friends and we need them before school lets out on Friday. Nothing expensive, I promise.”
“Tonight? We’d hardly have time to go to Phoenix or Prescott and get back home at a decent hour,” Vivian reasoned.
“I know, Mom, but time is running out! We’re okay with just going to Wickenburg. That won’t take too long. Please, please!”
Vivian did need to do some shopping herself, but on the other hand, Sawyer had already suggested that the two of them get together after work. Given everything that had happened between them last night, she was anxious to be alone with him again. Yet she didn’t want to disappoint her daughter. Especially here at Christmastime.
Perhaps she could invite Sawyer to go shopping with them, she thought. If he found an excuse to turn her down, it would be a fairly good indication of whether he wanted her for more than a bed partner.
With the decision quickly made, she said, “Okay, Hannah. You and Nick be ready. We’ll leave as soon as I get home from work.”
“What about dinner?”
“We’ll go to the Lazy Iguana. How about that?”
Her eyes wide with excitement, she hopped up and down. “Oh, that’d be super, Mom! Thank you! Thank you!”
She kissed Vivian’s cheek then raced away. A minute later she could hear her daughter calling up the stairs to her cousin Nick.
Smiling to herself, Vivian hurriedly snatched her jacket from the coat closet and headed out of the house.
* * *
Sawyer had never been on a shopping excursion, Christmas or otherwise, with a woman and a pair of kids. And he’d been fairly certain he’d feel like a fish out of water tagging along with the three of them. But when Vivian had explained the reason for the outing and invited him to go along, he’d not hesitated to accept. Mostly because he wanted to be with her, no matter the circumstances.
Now, two hours into the trip and five stores later, he decided that Christmas shopping was much more fun than he’d expected. Especially with Hannah and Nick’s comical banter.
“This is the last stop and then we’ll eat and head home,” Vivian announced to the children as they entered a Western wear store. “So you two be sure and get whatever you need on your shopping list.”
“It won’t take me long, Aunt Vivian,” Nick said. “I know exactly what I’m looking for and I don’t want Hannah to see it.”
Hannah playfully poked her tongue out at him. “That’s okay, snooty, I don’t want you to see what I’m buying in here, either.”
Smiling smugly, Nick hurried away and Hannah reached for Sawyer’s hand. “Will you come help me, Sawyer?”
He darted a questioning glance at Vivian, who smiled and waved him away. “Don’t mind me. I’ll go browse around while you two do your shopping.”
She walked away and Hannah tugged on his hand. “Over here at the jewelry, Sawyer. Let’s hurry before Mom comes back and sees us.”
He allowed the girl to lead him over to the opposite side of the store where Western-style jewelry was displayed behind a tall glass counter. A few feet away a saleslady was busy helping an elderly gentleman.
“I’ll be with you folks in a few minutes,” she promised.
“No hurry,” Sawyer told her. “We’re just looking.”
Hannah tugged on his hand to garner his attention. “I want to pick out something special for Mom. Like some earrings. What do you think?”
He’d never bought earrings for a woman. He’d always purposely avoided buying any type of jewelry for the women who’d come and gone in his life. They always seemed to equate sparkly trinkets with serious intentions and he’d never wanted to give that impression.
“You’re asking the wrong guy, Hannah. I don’t know much about jewelry.”
“But you know a lot about Mom and what she likes.”
Did he? There had been times Sawyer had thought he could read everything that was going through Vivian’s mind. But after last night at his uncle’s old house, he realized there were so many facets to the woman, it would take him years to learn them all.
Was that what he wanted? To spend years with Vivian?
Don’t be stupid, Sawyer. You could never keep a woman like her by your side. You might know about sex, but you don’t know a flip about love. How could you? Nobody has ever loved you, except for your grandmother. And she doesn’t count. She loves you because she’s old and soft and doesn’t have anybody else.
Hating the bitter voice in his head, Sawyer did his best to shake it away and focus on Hannah.
He said, “I do know that she always wears little dangly earrings. Mostly with silver and turquoise.”
Hannah nodded while gazing at the rows of jewelry beneath the glass. “She has lots of those. I’m thinking coral would look pretty with her red hair.”
“It would look beautiful,” he agreed, while thinking Vivian’s hair was the mesmerizing color of a red-gold sunset. Even when it was mussed it made a glorious halo around her head.
She looked up and gave
him a broad smile. “Uncle Holt is always telling me that I’ll never be as pretty as Mom. But that’s his way of teasing me. He says the inside of Mom is what makes her so beautiful. I think he’s right, don’t you?”
Something in the middle of Sawyer’s chest twisted into a tight knot. Hannah was so precious. She deserved a real father. One who would know exactly how to treat a daughter, to love and support her through bad times and good. She didn’t need a misfit like him, who could only pretend to be a father.
“Your uncle Holt is very right. So we’d better make sure we pick out something special for her. I like those,” he said, pointing to a pair of silver doves set against a round coral stone.
She took one look at them and let out a little squeal of delight. The sound was infectious and as she oohed and aahed, Sawyer found himself chuckling.
“Those are beautiful,” Hannah agreed. “And she really likes birds.”
“They’re doves,” Sawyer explained. “They’re a symbol of love and peace.”
“Then those are perfect! You go find Mom and make sure she doesn’t come over this way while I pay and get them wrapped,” she told Sawyer.
He gave her a conspiring wink. “Don’t worry. I’ll keep her busy.”
* * *
Much later, after they’d returned to Three Rivers and helped the children carry in their packages, Vivian and Sawyer escaped outside for a bit of privacy.
As the two of them strolled slowly toward the mares’ paddock, Vivian held on to his strong arm. “I’m keeping you out late again. And I should apologize for that. But I won’t. I’m so glad that you’re here.”
He gave her a faint smile. “I’m glad I’m here, too.”
“Thank you for being so patient with the kids. I could tell they really enjoyed your company.” She slanted a sly look at him. “You said you didn’t know anything about Christmas shopping, but I’m doubting that. You were too good at helping Hannah and Nick pick out just the right gifts.”
He chuckled. “It’s easy when you’re spending someone else’s money.”
“So are there people you’ll be buying for?” she asked curiously. “Your grandmother?”
“I have to be very careful with her. She won’t accept anything expensive because she doesn’t have the money to buy me a gift of equal value. I’ll keep it simple.”
By now they had reached the tall board fence that separated the large pasture from the ranch yard. At this time of the year, it was occupied with mares that were due to foal in early January. Several of them trotted over to say hello and search for a treat. Vivian pulled a few peppermints from the pocket on her jacket and gave each one a candy.
“I’d very much like to meet your grandmother,” she told him. “Do you think she’d mind?”
There was a long pause before he finally said, “I think she’d like that. But I’m...not sure about you...coming to the reservation.”
Resting her back against the fence, she gazed up at him. The security light for this section of the pasture was just enough illumination for her to catch the awkward expression on his face.
Completely puzzled by his reaction, she asked, “What does that mean? I was on the reservation with you last night. Am I not welcome at your home?”
He grimaced. “Of course you’re welcome. It’s just that—oh, hell, Viv. I might as well just say this plainly.”
“I wish you would.”
“Okay, once you see how I live, you might have a totally different view of me. You might decide that—uh, the two of us just can’t work. Not in the way you’re thinking.”
She wasn’t sure what he meant by that remark and she decided tonight was hardly the time to question him about it.
“Sawyer, that sort of attitude is insulting. Please don’t hold it against me because my family is wealthy. Whatever you’re thinking, I’m not a snob.”
“I never imagined you were. But your family wants the best for you. And I’m not the best. I’m far from it.”
Pushing away from the fence, she slipped her arms around his waist and drew her body close to the hard warmth of his. “I think I’m the one who should be deciding that. Don’t you?”
A wry smile twisted his lips. “Right now, I think you’re irresistible.”
Her heart began to thump with eager anticipation. “Then why are you resisting?” she whispered.
His head bent down to hers. “I’m not.”
Vivian closed her eyes and then his lips were on hers, searching, coaxing, reminding her of how it felt for their bodies to be completely connected. The kiss went on and on, rocking her senses and sending waves of heat crashing through every inch of her body.
Once it finally ended, she was breathless and her hands were clenched to the front of his shirt.
“You know what I’m thinking?” he asked.
Drawing in a shaky breath, she tilted her head back to look at him. “No. Tell me.”
“I’m thinking this Christmas is going to be very special.”
As long as she had him in her arms, it would be the most wonderful Christmas of all, she thought.
“Very special indeed,” she whispered, then tugged his head back down to hers.
Chapter Twelve
As Christmas Eve rapidly approached, the camping sites in the park filled to capacity. Even the primitive areas that didn’t offer electricity or other utilities were jammed with tents and travel trailers. The extra guests created more work for all the rangers at Lake Pleasant, but Vivian hardly noticed. A holiday spirit was putting everyone in a generous mood, making her job easier. Besides, she was too busy wondering where this newfound relationship with Sawyer was going to take her to be dwelling on the heavy workload.
Last evening she and Sawyer had managed to make another trip to his uncle’s house and though she’d not thought it possible, the few hours she’d spent in his arms had been even more incredible. Afterward, she’d hoped he would open up and talk to her about the future and his feelings for her. She wanted to believe that somewhere deep in his heart, he was beginning to love her. But he’d not said anything remotely close to the L word. Rather he was often pointing out the stark differences between them.
She glanced at him as he made a U-turn in the middle of the road and headed the SUV back in the direction of headquarters. Their work shift was about to end and the thought of not seeing him tonight elicited a sigh from deep within her.
“Are you tired?”
She cast him a faint smile. She hadn’t realized he’d heard the despondent sound. Now she needed to make sure he couldn’t read her mind. He was like one of the wild colts that Holt trained to the saddle. Making any kind of move that was too fast or abrupt was a surefire way to ruin the chance for a peaceful union.
“I’m not tired. I was just thinking. About how nice it would be to go back to the reservation tonight.” She could feel her cheeks growing pink and she wondered if she was becoming the most foolish woman in Yavapai County. After all the heartache and humiliation she’d been through with Garth, she should’ve known better than to fall in love with a man who considered marriage worse than a case of chicken pox or some other kind of annoying ailment.
“It would be nice,” he agreed. “But I’ve been away from Grandmother far too much here lately.”
Nodding, she swallowed back another wistful sigh. “I understand. I’ve been away from Hannah and my family too much. And I have lots of gift wrapping I need to do tonight. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. You haven’t forgotten, have you?”
He chuckled. “How could I? Every campsite we stop at folks are offering us candy and cookies and wishing us a merry Christmas. Much more of this and we’ll both be looking like a pair of fat town dogs.”
“Speak for yourself,” she teased. “It’s a wonderful time of the year. It reminds me that there’s still hope and love in the world.”
He didn’t say anything to that and she glanced over to see his gaze was thoughtfully fixed on the road ahead.
She rubbed a hand up and down her thigh in a nervous gesture, then berated herself for the silly reaction. This was Sawyer, the man she’d made love to more than once. She should be able to ask him most anything.
“Uh, you haven’t mentioned your plans, but I was hoping you’d come to Three Rivers and celebrate Christmas Eve with me and my family tomorrow night. Reeva will have all sorts of goodies to eat and Holt will play Santa Claus.”
He glanced at her. “You and your family open your gifts on Christmas Eve?”
“Some of the gifts. The things that Santa brings will be opened on Christmas Day.”
“I see.” He cast her a rueful glance. “It sounds like fun, but I can’t make it. I should’ve already explained to you that I always spend Christmas Eve with Grandmother. I don’t want to disappoint her.”
To say Vivian felt let down would be an understatement, but she did her best to hide it behind a bright smile. Besides, she truly did understand his situation and admired him for being so loyal to his grandmother. With her advancing years, he certainly didn’t want to miss such a special time with her.
“I understand, Sawyer, and I’m okay with it. As long as you know you’re wanted by me—and my family.”
“Thanks for the invitation, Viv.”
He glanced at her again and this time Vivian thought the expression on his face was a bit sheepish, although she couldn’t imagine why.
“Mort asked me if I wanted to work Christmas Day. I told him if he couldn’t find anyone else, I would, but Zane spoke up and offered to work in my place. Did Mort ask you to work that day?”
“No. I think he purposely tries to skip over the rangers who have families, so that they can stay home and celebrate.” She started to ask him if he had plans for that day, but as an idea began to form in her mind, she quickly decided not to mention Christmas Day at all.
A Ranger For Christmas (Linda Lael Miller Presents; Men 0f The West Book 40) Page 16