by Yuu Kamiya
“What is it?”
“Why was I able to fondle your boo—Okay, never mind.”
We’re in public; if you go any further—said Steph’s piercing glare, and Sora shut up.
“Anyway, this was a very interesting discussion. It was a great way to kill time.”
“You just explicitly said it was just to kill time, didn’t you?!”
As Sora lifted his sleepy head, he saw, around the table, the last three guys. Nobles in their underpants—three middle-aged dudes with a little too much fat. Also, watching them as if seeing something very pitiable were several spectators.
—He’d been playing half unconsciously and had almost forgotten. But Sora and Shiro were in the midst of a game with the three nobles. Poker, betting everything they had.
“Seriously, who wants to see a bunch of old guys naked… Can’t we call it a day?”
Indeed, they had just had all their assets cleaned out by Sora and Shiro, these three now-former nobles. “All their assets” meaning just what it said. Their land, their fortunes, their rights, of course, and even their wives, children, families. All of that had been wrung from the three in just two hours, and all they had left by now was their underpants.
“H-how—if we stop now, we won’t have anything left!”
“Y-y-you think you can get away with this?”
“If we don’t recoup our losses, we won’t even have clothes! How dare you!”
But Sora yawned as he half-listened and then spoke.
“…You’re the ones who agreed to play, and you’re the ones who laid your families and clothes on the table when we didn’t even ask you, right…
Plus, if I may—”
Arguing on, the three nobles—no, former nobles—shrunk at Sora’s eyes.
“We’re looking the other way about you three all cheating together. You should be grateful.”
“…Full house… Game over…”
The hand Shiro opened with those words. Meant that the nobles’ last bastion—their underpants—was taken.
—And so. The three noble ringleaders of the movement against agricultural reform were left in their birthday suits. And the demonstrations they’d stirred up came to a close.
The capital, Elkia: Main Street. It was an arterial road that joined the city’s north, east, south, and west and the castle. It was Elkia’s busiest street, and the one the nobles who had lost even their underpants opposing Sora’s agricultural reforms had to take home.
“Th-this is just too much; it’s sick…”
Walking the well-traveled road home among carriages and crowds, Steph said it.
“Did you really have to take their families?!”
“What, they just went ahead and bet them. To put their wives and children on the table, they’re the ones who are sick.” Sora answered from behind as he walked with Shiro’s hand firmly in his grasp. “But never mind that; this crowd… Sh-Shiro, whatever you do, don’t let go, okay?”
“…Y-y-you, too…Brother…”
The two spoke with their heads lowered while flinching at all the eyes around them. For two socially incompetent shut-ins, walking on a big street at noon was nothing but torture.
“Aren’t you the one who said you wanted to walk home, Sora?”
“I-I had something to do…b-b-but this is just too many…”
Hardly having left the castle in the months since they’d come to this world. The two jerked sketchily, gripping each other’s hands harder, as Steph sighed at them.
“So, what about all that stuff?”
“S-stuff? Wh-what stuff?”
“All the stuff you took from those three.”
“Oh, well, nothing in particular.”
Somehow putting his brave face on, Sora answered.
“If you’re talking about their families, they can do what they want. If they can forgive them for betting them, they’ll go back. The other stuff, well, you and the ministers can take care of it.”
The purpose of this visit had been to eliminate the nobles in the way of the agricultural reforms. Their being stripped naked was simply a means to strip their authority. Sora thought the state could just deal with the assets now.
“Um, Sora… It is my responsibility for not having been able to head off the protest, and I am sorry for having caused trouble to you two, but still, the way you’re doing things leaves a bad taste.”
Sora and Shiro may have rebuilt the country with one pillar after another of wisdom from another world. But only having been in this world for a month meant that they were liable to make a massive gaffe or two in an unfamiliar culture. To avoid any slipups from this, they limited themselves to dictating policy while the ministers handled execution. As a bridge, they employed Steph, with her thorough education in the ways of royalty.
—Or that’s what they said, while they dodged all the events in running a country they thought would be boring. In fact, they had said this a month before—
“We’ll set out the policy and direction. You and the ministers can work on the details. If there are any assholes who aren’t satisfied with that, bring ’em here. I’ll take everything they have and send ’em out naked—that’s what I said, right?”
“That’s what I’m saying! Your idea to begin with is savagery!”
“Don’t worry about it. A reign of terror would make things annoying later on, but just one or two things like this is nothing.”
Actually, if he kept this up, he’d be just like one of those genocidal reds.
“In fact, it’s really impressive to me that this is the first time this has happened in the month since we took the throne.”
Big agricultural and industrial reforms always caused disputes over rights. Nobles revolting, guilds conspiring. You always saw lame events like this in simulation games. He’d tossed all those annoying flags to Steph and the ministers to clear. But he hadn’t expected that it would be a whole month before they started popping up—
“Well, yes…I’d been controlling them.”
“…Controlling them?”
“From the beginning, most of the nobles opposed the agricultural reforms you proposed. Fortunately, the Dola family has some clout with the Oluos and the Bilds, so we were able to get them to help us set the stage.”
“………Huh? Oh, okay.”
“We used data gained from a large-scale experiment on lands held directly by the crown and sowed the spoils among major nobles who were on our side. Some of the petty lords came looking for a piece of the pie, and we slowly isolated the lords they served… There were some major houses we had no choice but to confront. The three today were at the top of those, so this shouldn’t happen again. You should avoid provoking them unnecessarily and proceed—Wait, what?”
Interrupting the smooth flow of Steph’s words by putting his head to his forehead, Sora.
“…I-it doesn’t feel like I’ve got a fever. Why does Steph sound like she’s smart!” said Sora, clearly consternated. “Is there something wrong with me?! S-sorry to make you take us all around, but I’ve got to see a doctor right—”
“……Um, excuse me, isn’t that taking your rudeness a little too far?” Steph’s shoulder shook, to which Sora replied with a shout.
“But, I mean—you’re Steph, right?!”
“Yes, I am Steph; so?!”
Closing his eyes and shaking his head, Sora.
“Hey, hey, wait, wait, matte, matte, could it be…”
Like a physicist who’d just witnessed a real ghost, his assumptions had been shattered. It can’t be possible, he thought. He swallowed audibly and with a look of agony. He then pronounced a fact he couldn’t believe.
“I don’t think this is possible…but, Steph, could it be…you’re—not an idiot?!” said Sora, shouting in disbelief a fact he could hardly accept.
“U-um… Do you know I graduated at the top of my class from this nation’s top academy; what are you on about!!”
“But, I mean—look at yourself?!�
�
—Stephanie Dola. The well-bred young lady, once the granddaughter of the king of Elkia. Now wearing a collar and the ears and tail of a dog. The leash from her neck was held by Shiro as she walked. The downtown thoroughfare.
“What kind of smart person would be in your position?!”
“Aren’t you the one who put me in this position?!”
Yes, just this morning, after Steph got her ass kicked at blackjack by Sora. “Okay, now you’re a dog for the rest of the day,” she had been told randomly, and she was forced to comply. Given that she was taking a walk down Elkia’s Main Street in that state, it was no surprise. But everyone on the street looked back at her with eyes as if they’d just seen something bizarre. It must also be mentioned that even at the mansion just now, she had been like that the whole time.
“C-couldn’t you think of something better to demand than that?!”
As Steph shouted, suggesting that her anger had returned at this late hour, Sora and Shiro thought:
—Looks like she’s pretty much the same as always.
“…Steph, shake…”
When Shiro held out her hand and said this. Steph draped her front paw—rather, her right hand—on Shiro’s right hand.
“Ng-ghh… Why must I obey you!”
“I thought you just explained it a minute ago. Because those are the rules of the world.”
—The Sixth of the Ten Covenants: Wagers sworn by the Covenants are absolutely binding.
“…Steph, lie down…”
Flattening her body on the surface of the thoroughfare, Steph cried out.
“Ungghh! I mean, why can’t I beat you!”
At this question, Sora sighed with evident relief.
“Oh, so you couldn’t figure it out after all… I’m glad you’re the same old Steph.”
“It sounds like you’re using Steph as an insult; is it just me?! Is it just me?!”
But Sora ignored Steph’s protestations and took out his phone, never having guessed how hard Steph was actually working. He took another look at the national data he had graphed from the ministers’ reports on an app. It looked like most of his reform proposals were going to go through smoothly. He wasn’t entirely satisfied with the area that had been achieved for dairy farming, but, if things worked, it should fit the population trend. And, meanwhile, those employment problems were getting better to some extent—having confirmed these things, he started his task scheduler. Going through “Reform agriculture,” “Reform industry,” “Reform finance,” etc., he put a check to mark the completion of each one.
“…But, still, it is just stopgap…”
As much as they used knowledge from another world, fundamentally there weren’t enough resources and land. It would take half a year for the agricultural reforms to start bearing fruit. Even if they wanted to overclock the hell out of their technology, they just didn’t have enough materials in the country.
“I guess it’s true—we have no choice but to ‘take back our territory,’ right?”
In other words. It was finally time to move to take back the borders. But—where could they strike…
“…”
Shiro seemed to understand Sora’s thoughts as he fell silent, falling silent herself to think for a long time. Steph, walking in front with a collar on her neck, was thereby forced into silence herself.
—But. Steph was unable to take the looks directed at her.
“So-Sora. I-I can’t stand these stares; please, at least talk—”
At Steph’s remonstration, Sora noticed something odd.
“…Hm? Isn’t there something weird about the way people are looking at us?”
“What you expect when you dress me up like this?!”
“No, I mean…don’t they look kind of scared?”
Having noticed something faintly odd about the looks directed at Steph, Sora asked. Indeed, they weren’t the looks of ridicule directed at a buffoon forced to walk in costume—rather, they seemed to be looking at Sora and Shiro with unease…
“What do you expect when the monarch of Elkia is leading someone dressed as a Werebeast?”
—…Come again?
“Wait, what did you say just now?”
“Who’d believe that the monarch of Elkia would make someone—”
“No! That’s not my point!”
“Wait, are you saying that wearing dog ears and a tail makes you look like…a Werebeast?”
In a flash, Sora replayed in his brain all the information he had gathered so far.
—Ixseed Rank Fourteen, Werebeast. A race whose foremost territory was the Eastern Union, the third-largest nation in the world. Little information was available, but they knew they had extremely sharp physical prowess and senses. And that they had something called a sixth sense, reputed even to read minds, and that was about it.
“…Steph, please answer immediately.”
“Huh? Wh-what is it?”
“Werebeasts—do they include girls with animal ears and tails like you have on right now?”
“…The reason you limit your argument to girls is beyond my understanding, but—”
Of course they do, she thought. To begin with, started Steph—“Female Werebeasts practically all look like this, you know!”
…
“…So what you’re saying is, the Eastern Union”—with a gulp, Sora asked as if to check—“is a country where females who look almost exactly like human chicks, except for animal ears and tails and maybe paw pads and whiskers and such, sugoi kawaii kemono-chan, fill out half the population of a veritable Eden that really exists in this world—is that what you’re saying?”
Was she saying that the Eastern Union—was that kind of an Arcadia?
“Hell, yeah, this paradise is mine! Let’s go conquer the animal girls! Now! Stat!”
He drew his phone like a sword, and started his task scheduler! Conquer animal girl dynasty #yolo, he started typing, while Steph.
“Hey—wha-what are you saying! Things aren’t even stable yet at home!”
To the “mad king” who’d just suggested picking a fight with the third-largest nation in the world. But Sora showed no engagement.
“Ahh, hush! How dare you find fault with this perfect keikaku in which my private desires and the national interest are perfectly aligned! What makes you think you can stand in the way of my glory?!”
Looking around as if searching for something, Sora shouted on.
“Which way to the Eastern Union?! That way?! We’ll charge ahead; call a carriage!!”
But, while Sora ranted on. The little sister whose hand he held dropped a single soft word…
“……Information…”
“Ung—gh…!”
…And shattered his so-called perfect plan just like that.
—Yes. What they’d just been thinking about. And the reason that, in the month since their coronation, when they’d declared war on the whole world. They still hadn’t gone on the offensive to this day. Had been pointed out, silencing Sora.
“Hrm, rmghgh… Is there no way to avoid solving this puzzle first…”
As Sora and Shiro shut up once more, silence revisited.
…—. Not that she enjoyed Sora’s outbursts. But the silence weighed on Steph in its own way.
“Uh, uhh, Sora, tell me why I lost at blackjack this morning—”
Steph, unable to bear the silence, tried to make conversation.
…But no answer came. Steph looked back. But.
“……………Huh?”
The leash, which mere moments ago Shiro was holding, was now dragging on the ground. And the two who were supposed to be there were nowhere to be found.
“—Huh? Hey, are you…leaving me like this?”
Amidst the soft sound of giggles, a gust of cold wind came through.
“…De…licious…”
A library on the other side of a labyrinthine alley breaking out from Main Street. Before it was a café, where Sora and Shiro gorge
d themselves on doughnuts and tea while holding books.
“They’re pulling it off despite not having enough ingredients…but it does seem the reserves are in bad shape.”
Doughnuts they had bought from one of the stands at the square off Main Street, and black tea from the café. But the stands seemed to have lost their original vitality. One could tell from the vendors’ faces that times were tough. It was fair to say that this spoke to the whole of Elkia now. Looking at the data, by the standards of Sora and Shiro’s old world, it would be about time for riots and pillaging. But what was really odd—
“How about you, Shiro; you find anything?”
“…Hm. Nope…no luck…”
“Surprise, surprise. Jeez, what’s up with this country? There’s something weird about it.”
“—There’s, something, weird about—”
“—your heads, you knaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaves!”
Appearing with this cry, her shoulders heaving with heavy breaths, was Steph (doggy version).
“Oh, Steph. Where were you? We looked for you.”
“‘Oh’? What do you mean, ‘Oh’! Did you actually just forget?! Could it be that your reason for dressing me up like a collared dog and abandoning me in the middle of the city was not teasing or harassment, but that you just forgot?!”
Shouting this with tears in her eyes, Steph. Supplicated at Sora’s feet.
“Please! Do this one thing for me, just let me punch you!! In heaven’s name I beg!!”
“Uh, well… See, Shiro smelled something good and started drifting away. Obviously I can’t let go of Shiro’s hand, and I totally thought she had your leash—and by the time I realized you weren’t there…”
“Steph, forgive. And sit,” Shiro commanded, her mouth full of doughnut and her thumb up. Sora continued.
“Yeah, well, Shiro didn’t mean anything, either, so forgive her.”
“You’re making me sit, commanding me to forgive you, and you think that’s an apology? It’s really just abuse, isn’t it?!”
Still in her doggy “sit” position, Steph pointed at Sora and screamed: