“I knew you’d pick up,” he says to me suddenly.
“What?”
“Last night,” he says. “Even though it was four-thirty in the morning. I knew you’d pick up.”
“Well, of course, silly.” I smile.
“You don’t always know that. There are a lot of people you can’t count on, you can’t be sure will be there for you.”
I look at him sharply.
He reaches over and touches my hand with his just for a split second. His profile shows little, but I can see one thing, and that’s how much he’s blinking.
“What are you holding back?” I stand up and step between his legs so I can look right into his eyes. “What are you crying over?”
He tries to turn away, but his eyes fill with tears, and then the tears spill over. I reach out and start to wipe them off his face, but as fast as I do, more tears keep coming. Just like when the river flooded all those years ago— an overflow from being dammed up too tight for too long.
I put my arms around him and pull him close to me. “Tell me,” I whisper.
I’m ready. For almost anything except what comes out of his mouth.
“Gigi’s mother slept with your father.”
Shit.
I jerk my head back and look into Logan’s eyes to make sure he’s not telling some dumb joke.
But he’s never looked so serious.
“I overheard her father talking about Benjamin Henwood who owns The Cowherd Whiskey. He said he had a lot of dirt on Mr. Henwood and he’d make sure he got put behind bars for life and that his family would lose the bar.”
I’m swaying. My body is so weak I can’t hold it up.
But I don’t need to because Logan’s arms wrap around me tightly. He tugs me forward and I sink down onto his lap.
“How many years ago did she sleep with my daddy?”
“Four.”
Four. So, Skip did his research. Like always.
“I went out to West Texas, because that’s where Mr. Phillips was headed. He’d mentioned the name of his hotel, and I checked in…”
“You must have spent a fortune,” I say in horror.
“It was worth it.”
“Logan…”
“I waited a while before I even saw him. I was afraid I’d miss him altogether. But then, Gigi approached me privately. She liked what I was painting, and she confessed she had a problem. She pointed out her father, and we got to talking. I told her I knew your father, and I said he didn’t deserve prison. She asked if I would be interested in a mutual deal—a win-win for both of us.”
“What would Gigi win?”
When Logan explains about her inheritance, I start to get it. Why she seemed so lost. When she learned to shoot, she finally felt in control of something, something her parents couldn’t take away from her. I feel a twinge of shame for how I judged her.
“Gosh, the grass really does seem greener, doesn’t it?” I say out loud. “Tell me the rest of the story.”
“Somehow, we pulled it off,” Logan says. “We convinced Mr. Phillips we were in love and that we wanted to marry right away. He asked me to sign a prenup promising I wouldn’t fight her for the money if we divorced, and I did. And he signed off on agreeing to destroy all evidence that he made up about your father. He agreed to let all of it go.”
I stare at him. “You agreed to marry her…to save my family?”
“I agreed to marry her for you, Macey.” Logan’s eyes turn feral. “I would do anything to protect you. You know that. Just like I know you would—and have—for me.”
“Logan. Shit.” I put my hand on his cheek. “I can’t believe any of this. Is that why you and Gigi didn’t have sex? Because it wasn’t real?”
He nods. “I never even kissed her on the mouth. I missed you every second I was with her.”
“I missed you, too. So much.” I furrow my brow. “So what ended up happening in Florida? I’m guessing you didn’t get married.”
Logan shakes his head. “We didn’t. My dad dragged the truth out of me at the hotel. He knew I was covering something. He knew I was this close to running. Even though it was fake, I couldn’t imagine being with anyone but you. And so, I told him everything. He didn’t want me to do it that way, to marry someone I didn’t love. Even if it was for you. So we came up with another plan.”
“Knowing your father, I’m almost afraid to ask what this plan entailed,” I say. “Seriously, I am.”
Logan grins. “It wasn’t that bad. Gigi and I went to her parents and told them the truth. They were stunned their daughter would go that far because of her father’s restrictions and demands. Mr. Phillips agreed to change the inheritance rules. Her sisters both got married at eighteen and didn’t fight back, so she was the first one to raise a fuss.”
“That’s good for Gigi.”
“And Mrs. Phillips was furious with her husband for what he had planned on doing to your father. She had no idea, and she put a stop to it. She admitted she didn’t have her ring on the night your daddy hit on her, and she never told him she was married. She made her husband let the whole thing go. He had new legal documents drawn up, and he signed off on them. I saw them myself.”
I widen my eyes. “So…”
“So it’s done. Your father’s safe, and I’m single. And Gigi’s getting her money without having to hitch onto a guy.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
I exhale. “Holy crap.”
“Yeah. But if you hadn’t taken the deal with Skip like you did…who knows what would have happened? So by protecting me, you protected yourself and your family, too.”
I clutch at Logan’s shirt with both fists. I don’t even know what to say.
“Mace, I wish I could turn back time. I’m sorry about all the drama, and I’m afraid it’s too late to make it up to you. This summer was so hard, and I hate how badly I fucked all this up.” Logan inhales sharply. “I don’t want either of us to say anything at all if it’s too damn late because it will just hurt too much.”
I lean my head back until we make eye contact. “It’s never too late. Not for us. And you didn’t fuck anything up, Logan. Don’t ever say that again. I can’t tell you what it means to me that you did all of that. For me and my family. Thank you.”
Logan pulls me closer, so close I can see his eyes shining by the firelight. They look more at peace than I’ve seen them since he came back from West Texas. They look like Logan’s eyes again. Except different, somehow.
Yes, the dullness is gone. But the urge to run—that thing we had in common—isn’t lurking in the shadows. It’s like he’s not afraid of anything. Like he wants me and he won’t hide his feelings behind spin the bottle or drunken nights or desperate moments of pain that always end in a goodbye the next day. I see it all in his eyes in this moment.
And I do the cowardly thing. The typical Austen Macey Henwood thing.
I panic.
I back up, jump off of him, and take off for the truck like I’m a deer being hunted.
“Macey!” Logan runs after me and stops me as I’m reaching for the front door. “Hey.”
His arms go around me from behind. I exhale and rest the back of my head on his chest. He turns me around and looks directly into my eyes. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s different.” I look at him closely. “You’re different. So am I. We’re different together. I know we are. But I’m still a coward.”
“Why?” His voice rumbles in my ear, and I shiver.
“Because the way we used to be was so easy. When we knew it would only be for one night, and then…”
“And then everything went back to normal,” he finishes for me. “I know. You think I didn’t get the meaning of our pact? But pacts like that can’t always last forever.”
“I just…I love being independent,” I say in a shaky voice, still trying to keep the steel bars around my heart. “I love feeling like I can’t get hurt.”
“Independence doesn’t have to mean being
alone.” Logan tucks a stray hair from my braid behind my ear. “Does it?”
I take two fistfuls of his t-shirt and bring him even closer to me, so close I can smell the hint of whiskey again on his breath.
“Were you drinking?”
“One glass on the plane. Tried to calm my nerves. Turns out I don’t love to fly.”
Logan puts his mouth to my neck.
His lips are like a drug I never want to be without again. He runs his mouth across my neck and down to my collarbone, and he plants a kiss there before lifting his head.
His eyes are smoldering, and I hold my breath.
“Macey, I just want you to know…”
Logan puts his hands on my face and pulls me toward him gently. And I go to him before he can say more.
His kiss is soft, so soft, and somehow that makes it even more erotic. A cry escapes my throat when his tongue gently works its way into my mouth, and I stop fighting.
We stay that way for a long time, our mouths intertwined with nothing to stop us for the first time all summer. My legs are trembling as Logan unties my braid until my hair is loose and he’s got one handful of it tight against my neck. His breath is ragged when he pulls off my top and unhooks my bra.
Then he kisses my breast. And I nearly come undone.
He painstakingly unbuttons my jean shorts until they slip off me. When he moves his hand over my underwear, touching me like only he can, I lean back against the truck and wrap my arms around his neck.
“You know you’re still the only man who’s gotten me off with his hand.”
His hand stills over the lace fabric. “Seriously?”
I put my hand over his. “I guess I never really trusted anyone else.”
His fingers move slowly, so slowly beneath the elastic of my underwear that I shake in anticipation. When they finally reach the wetness waiting for him, we make eye contact.
“The first time I touched you here, I thought I’d pass out from how much I wanted you and how scared I was that I’d screw up.” Logan’s eyes are flames of desire surging into mine. “The way you moved when you came—it was my go-to jerk-off movie for months.”
“Just months?” I tease him.
“Well, then I got to make love to you. And that took first place. Until the next time we made love, and then that became the best. Each time was better than the last.”
He slips one finger inside me and moves it just where I need it, then uses his thumb to stroke up higher.
“That’s it, baby.” Logan’s eyes glaze over as he watches me throw my head back against the truck. “Let go.”
My orgasm doesn’t happen like I expect it to, with a slow build-up followed by coiling tension and then a release, sometimes big, sometimes huge, sometimes quick.
This orgasm is like an atomic bomb going off. It’s hard and it’s long and it’s…momentous. Like the concept of losing Logan forever did something to my body, made it lonely and needy and…a little crazy.
I cry out Logan’s name over and over and clutch at his back as I continue to clench around his finger.
“You’ve never come like that.” Logan’s lips brush mine. “Not with me.”
“Not ever. The biggest orgasms of my life have all been with you.”
When the rest of our clothes are in a pile on the ground, he lifts me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist. My hips grind into his, desperately seeking contact.
Holding me tightly with one arm, Logan traces a line with his finger from my neck down to my heart. I stretch my arm out, grab my purse off the front of the truck, and pull a condom out of it.
My whole body is shaking from how much I want him.
“I’ve missed you,” he says into my ear, and the honesty in his voice cracks my last bit of armor wide open. “Nothing in my entire existence will ever come close to you, Mace. Ever.”
Chills run through my body. I open my eyes, and his are fixed on mine.
I exhale as my heart fully unlocks. I lean forward to kiss him as I hand him the condom. My short gasps blend with his deep groans as I finally open up and pull him tight, letting him inside me.
He’s so hard that when he first enters me, I don’t think I’ll have room for him.
“You’ve never been this hard before.” I gasp and try to relax.
“I’ve never missed you this much before.” He grips my hip so tightly as he tries to slow his movements that I’m sure he’ll leave a mark. “I thought I lost you, Macey. I was so scared I’d lost you.”
I shudder against the truck as he inches in further.
“Okay?” He checks in with me.
“Yes.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure. You feel amazing.”
I lock my ankles together behind his back, and his next surge forward brings him all the way inside me.
And then neither of us lasts long. I buck against him like a bronco, but he holds me safely in place as we reach that high together. His eyes stay on mine the entire time, and he mutters my name as he comes.
I kiss him for a long time afterward then bury my face in his neck, my bare breasts pressed against his solid chest while our hearts beat to the same rhythm.
While I’ve always opened up to Logan when we make love, I’ve also held a little of myself back. I made sure to keep an exit door in plain view so I could turn around and walk away whenever I got scared. I guess just like my daddy taught me.
Tonight, I slammed that exit door shut.
I keep my arms around Logan as he plants kisses all over my face, my hair, and my mouth. He carries me over to the picnic blanket and grabs a sleeping bag from the truck. He lays it flat on top of the blanket, and we snuggle underneath it together.
I prop my head up on one elbow and look at him by the firelight. The dark shadows under his eyes are gone. His scar even looks less angry.
“You were right.” He traces a line over my bare hip slowly. “Marrying you like that in Vegas wasn’t the right thing for us at all.”
“I don’t like the way I freaked out. I was scared. But you knew that.”
“I get it. I had things to deal with, too. With myself and the fact that all my father wanted was for me to be something I’m not. We worked some of that out in Florida.”
“I’m glad.”
Logan sighs, and the flash of pain in his eyes reveals how much it’s worn on him through the years.
“And after he and I talked everything over, I went up to my room and checked my email.”
Oh, no.
His lips curve up. “Your novel was sitting there. And I started reading. I read the whole damn thing from start to finish without stopping once.”
I take a deep breath.
“I didn’t know. I didn’t know what it would be about. I was so…” he pauses. “Emotional. That you would feel so much from our memories to put any of them into a book was just really cool. I know it’s fiction, of course, but I loved it.”
“You inspired me. Our…” I stop, not sure what to call it. “Our friendship inspired me. And I wanted you to know—I needed you to know—that I finally stopped denying what it means to me. What you mean to me.”
Logan takes my chin in his hand. “You’ve got it, baby. The story, the talent, the writing, all of it. It’s all there.”
I swallow. “I guess that’s good because I sent out some queries already. And one agent asked to read the manuscript.”
“I’m so proud of you.” Then, he grins at me. “So you made us ghosts?”
I smile. “Four-hundred-year-old ghosts. Pretty awesome, right?”
“Pretty awesome. I especially appreciated the red raindrop tattoo each ghost was, as you wrote, branded with so neither one could ever forget what they promised.” He snuggles closer to me. “Looks like we’ll be stuck here till morning when the sun will dry out the mud around the truck.”
“Oh, really?” I laugh. “Just like that, we’re stuck?”
“Pretty much. I mean, there’s also the other
reason.”
“What’s that?” I say as his hand curves over my ass.
“I want to touch you all night long.”
I roll onto my back and pull him on top of me. Then, I slip my hand between us so I can take him hard in my hand. He moans into my mouth, his lips passionate and hungry on mine.
“I want to kiss you everywhere.” His eyes darken. “Every forbidden place I’ve ever been lucky enough to taste. I’ve missed all of it.”
He moves his head down my neck and across my breasts, his mouth eagerly tracing a path to my belly button and then stopping between my thighs. His lips are soft and perfect, and I clutch at his hair with my hands.
“God, Logan.”
His tongue is relentless as it teases and strokes and brings me over the edge again. I pull so hard at his hair I’m certain I must hurt him.
But he smiles up at me. “Go wild, baby. You know how I love you wild and undone.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
I tell him to come back up here so I can kiss him, and when he does, I help him roll on a condom. “I want you inside me again. Don’t go easy this time.”
He moves into me with one thrust, and I gasp.
“Like this?”
His name slips out of my mouth in a shrill cry. “Yes. Again.”
He smiles into my eyes as he lets me guide him.
We slow down, and the build-up is intoxicating. Logan’s heart pounds over mine as he lifts my arms over my head and intertwines our fingers together. Our movements get faster and choppier, and I close my eyes to savor the feeling of him inside of me. The closer we get, the harder Logan pulses into me, and when he reaches down and lifts my hips higher, I let out a load moan.
“Right there,” he says. “You love it right there.”
“Yes,” I pant as he hits the spot again and again. “Only you’ve ever touched me there. Nobody else.” Oh, God, I’m going to come. “Just you, baby.”
“Mace, so fucking good,” he sighs as our lovemaking comes to a crescendo.
Wild Girl: A Cowboy Romance Trilogy (Wild Men Texas Book 3) Page 14