by Kara Hart
My adrenaline immediately kicked in and I ran out of that car as fast as a bullet. “Jen!” I cried out. “Are you alright?” Out of the corner of my eye was another figure. It was a man, about five foot ten in height, thin. He was already ahead of me, maybe 200 yards. I got out my gun and chased after the son of a bitch.
“Hey! Stop or I’ll shoot you dead!” I aimed my gun, but he already started to run. There wasn’t anything I hated more than a runner. Soon enough I was darting through the woods, stepping on leaves and trying my damned hardest not to lose sight of the guy. But he clearly had a leg up on me. Without the knowledge of the area, I was useless. The trails all blended together and I was eventually forced to go back to Jen. I had to make sure she was okay before taking secondary action.
“Jen!” I put my gun away and jogged back to the place I found her sitting. “You alright?” I asked her, as I got close, choking on air. It had been a long time since I chased a man and clearly being in Monroe had taken its toll on me. I swear, I needed to cut down on those quiches if I was going to get myself back in shape.
“Lucas? Where’s mommy?” she asked me. I had her near me now. She was safe. Somebody was playing games with Dahlia. It had to be somebody close to her. I had feeling I knew who it was too.
“I don’t know,” I said truthfully. I looked around us. There was no one in sight. No sounds except for the high-pitched chirping of the birds around us. Somewhere close was the man who took her, Cade. I was sure of it. He was watching our every move. He might seem menacing today, but sooner or later he was going to slip up and I was going to get him. He’d be the Luciotti family’s burden then, and the family business could decide what to do with that trash.
“Mommy always picks me up from summer school now,” she said. Summer school? At her age? Shit, she needs a man in her life. She needs someone who can help take care of Jen.
“Let’s go find her, sweetie,” I said, holding my hand out to her. She grabbed it and I took her to my car. “Don’t you worry, the bad man won’t hurt you anytime soon.” Tearstains streaked down her cheeks. She wiped her nose and smiled.
I started the engine and headed towards her house. If she normally picked her up at this time, she would have already figured out Jen was missing. I had a feeling she was at home, talking to the police. I felt sick at the thought. Police. Sure, they protect people like Jen. As for me, I needed to stay as far away as I could from them. I wasn’t going back to prison. Not anytime soon, dammit.
“He wasn’t going to hurt me,” Jen said, looking more and more calm each second. I arched my eyebrow at her. Must be nice to be young and naïve.
“What’re you talking about?” I said. “He was abducting you, Jen. He was going to take you away from your mother.”
“No he wasn’t. He was taking me to play,” she said.
“To play? Why are you crying then? It doesn’t seem like you were having such a good time.” What kind of shit was this guy up to anyway? What was his plan of action? Clearly he knew I was looking for him. He was supposed to be hiding out in Detroit. Why would he risk everything to come back to Monroe, the town where his debt awaited him?
“He said Mommy was hurt and that I would need to come with him for a while. I was sad. Mommy’s never been hurt before. I wanted to protect her,” she said.
“You’re very brave, Jen.” I turned the corner to her house and, sure enough, the block was littered with cop cars. I drove past the line of them and turned into the driveway. Through the windshield, Dahlia saw us and ran toward the car, tears falling down her face. I watched the relief wash over her, followed by the anger flooding her bloodstream when she saw that I was the one who had Jen.
I parked the car and turned to her. “You’re safe at home now,” I said.
Dahlia nearly ripped the car door off when she opened it. “Jen! Oh, my sweet baby! Where have you been?” And then, of course, she turned to me. I got out of the car, raising my hands above my head. If she was going to tear my limbs off, like I thought she might, it would be better to haul me away to prison instead.
“You!” she spat. “What did you do to my daughter?” Her face was red and filled with hatred. Frankly, it wasn’t a good look for her. I remained calm, as always, and waited for her to calm down so I could tell her my side of things.
However, Jen was already itching to tell her everything. “Mom! Mom!” She tugged at Dahlia’s short red, white, and blue, dress. I wanted to tug at it myself. I wanted to tear at every last piece of thread until she was on the floor, begging for me. The way she looked at me, with such hatred. Oddly, it was a turn-on.
“I found Daddy! I talked to him!” she said. Uh-oh. Not good. I decided I had better jump in and explain things before Dahlia lost her mind and killed everyone in sight. A mother and her cub … how did the saying go?
“I found her sitting in the woods, near the road to my place. She’s okay though. I think he was just trying to scare you,” I said.
“Excuse me, but who is he exactly?” A female officer walked down from Dahlia’s house, clutching at her walkie-talkie, as if I was the culprit in all of this.
“Just a family friend,” I said. It wasn’t a complete lie. Cops made me nervous. I had half a mind to leave then and there.
“We’re going to need to get your statement on paper. You have identification?” she asked me.
Thankfully, Dahlia stepped in. “It’s, uh, fine. She’s safe and home now. I’d rather not file any charges. Thank you for all your help.”
The officer set the walk-talkie back in her jacket. “You sure? You’re all safe now?” She was eying me still. I got it the point –a big, scary man who looked up to no good. He must’ve hurt the kid in some way. He must’ve. Only, I was the hero here. Despite that little fact, I knew I would end up going home a villain. I was used to that sort of thing happening to me. That was the reason why I didn’t go out in plain sight very much.
“Yeah, I’m sure,” she said, holding Jen in her arms. She looked beautiful, those faint wrinkles around her eyes. I knew they were from years of stressing over the people she gave all her love to. She deserved everything in the world. I had seen some shit in my life, but I had never felt the hardships of being a single mother.
“Alright, we’ll pack it in.” She signaled to the rest of the officers that it was time to head back to the station. Still, she turned to Dahlia as they were about to leave, and said “If you need anything. I mean, anything. Don’t hesitate to call. You know the number.” Dahlia nodded and they took off.
157
Dahlia
“Shit. That was close,” he muttered. I glared at him. There was no doubt in my mind it was his fault this all happened. No doubt at all.
“Shut up,” I said. “I’m so tired of hearing things come from your mouth. Why can’t you just leave my family and me alone? Can’t everyone just leave us alone?” It took a lot for me to not break down right then and there. The past few years of making a new life for us had been hard enough. Now it had become real evident that all that work was for nothing. “Come on, Jen. Let’s go inside.”
As we turned toward the house, he asked us “Aren’t you going to ask me to come in? You need protection. He’s still out there.”
I stopped, facing the other direction. Jen ran inside, skipping and laughing. It was as if nothing had happened to her. Kids were so adept at forgetting and us parents had to carry just about every burden.
Lucas, on the other hand, was a bastard. The problem wasn’t that he was an asshole. The problem was that, deep down, I knew he was a good guy. He was Mafioso at the core of his very being. But he had saved Jen and he had been trying so hard to be there for us. There were the huge tips, helping Jen with her homework, and not to mention his strength and protectiveness. I couldn’t stay mad at him forever, no matter how much I wanted to.
“Fine. We’ll have it your way. Come in.” I sighed, making my way inside the house.
We sat down in the living room while Jen played in
her room. Normally I would be riding her to do her homework, but today was operating under different circumstances. “He found her,” he said. “But I don’t think he’s trying to hurt her.”
Right when I sat next to him, I broke down and cried. “I don’t know what’s going on anymore,” I said. “I’ve got to be the worst mother in history to lose my child to my ex-boyfriend. And then I meet you and you’re,” I hesitated to finish, wiping my eyes. “Well, you’re you. A gangster. And I thought maybe I could trust you. But I can’t trust anyone. They all just lie and let me down.”
He put his arm around me and I soon found myself falling into his chest. It was comforting. His scent, warmth, and strength fit me like a missing puzzle piece. I hadn’t felt that way before. Not even with Cade.
“You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met,” he said. “And even if you cast me out like the rest of society, I’ll always be grateful I met you.”
I looked up at him, drying my tears, and said “You’re crazy. You don’t even know me. I’m just some girl you met at a café in a small town. You’ll forget all about me in a month or less.”
“Well, you’re right about something. I am crazy. But that doesn’t mean I’m dumb. You’re sassy, strong, and you’re mean as hell. But those are all parts of you that keep me coming back for coffee every morning. I know you didn’t want to see me again, and I’ll respect that. But I won’t forget about you. Not tomorrow. Not in a month. Not in ten years,” he said.
“I’m still mad at you, you know.” Though, with each passing minute I was finding less and less reason to hold my grudge. It was a surprise finding out who he really was, but maybe he wasn’t as bad as I thought he was.
“I know you are. You should be. I’m a bastard. I’m not one of those golden guys that every woman wishes they’d settle down with. I’m a hard man from the streets. Plain and simple. I don’t deserve your well wishes. I don’t deserve anything.”
He sighed and collected himself. “Look, here are the facts. He wanted to make a statement so he took your daughter. Obviously he knew we'd find her. He wanted us to. The big win for him was making an impression on Jen. We can't let him do that again,” he said. The way he wanted to protect Jen really got to me. Why did he care about us so much? What did he have to gain by helping us? The answer, of course, was nothing. If anything, he had more to lose than gain.
“Will he be back?” I asked, thinking about the trauma Cade had caused our family already. Seeing him face to face would be the worst thing that could happen to me right now.
“Have you really killed people before?” I squeezed out the words from my throat. Just the thought of it scared the hell out of me. However, it was information I needed to know.
“Sure have. Some very bad men. Men who have killed hundreds of other men. When you sign up to be a part of the underworld, you live by a code. We’re soldiers, Dahlia. Some soldiers get gunned down in the line of fire.”
“Is Cade a soldier then? Are you going to ‘gun him down’?” I asked him.
“If he touches anyone close to him again, I shouldn’t need to justify gunning him down. He’s not a soldier, no. But he’s a son of a bitch who deserves to rot for what he’s done,” he said. “And I’ll stick by that for the rest of my life.”
I lifted my head off his chest and found myself saying the worst possible thing I could. It was like I enjoyed falling into trouble’s arms. “Why don’t you stay here? You know, for the night. I’m scared Cade will come back for Jen. We could use the protection,” I said, eying the curvature of his shoulders. Was I really doing this? Again?
“Sure. Uh, I could do that. I'll patrol the house while you sleep,” he laughed.
“Well, I was thinking you could sleep in my room. It would make me feel safe. I think I need that right now. You know, to feel safe. That is, if you want. The bed is, er, comfy.” I stuttered and looked away awkwardly. Get it together, Dahlia.
“That sounds peaceful,” he said. He stood up, renewing his energy. “It's obvious you've had a tough week. Let me make it up to you,” he said.
“I'd like to see you try.” It was the first time I let myself smile since discovering Jen was missing.
“Maybe we could make a night of this bullshit and take Jen to the park to watch the fireworks. I'm sure she would rather be outside than cooped up here,” he said.
I had totally forgot. It was 4th of July and this holiday was one of Jen’s favorites. Back in Seattle, she would go crazy over the fireworks. “Jen would love that,” I said. “Just don’t be weird. This doesn’t mean we’re together or anything.”
He laughed and stood up, extending his hand. “Right. I’m just a hired gun. I think I can live with that.”
I grabbed ahold of his hand and he lifted me up onto my feet. “Jen!” I shouted, “Come in here!”
She ran into the room, holding a flower in her hand. “Mommy! I picked this for you earlier. Do you like it?” Half of the petals were missing and it looked like it had been sitting in her pocket for a good amount of time, but it was the little things that counted in this life and I loved it.
“It’s beautiful, Jen! Thank you so much.” I kissed her cheek and she hopped on her heels.
Lucas knelt down before her and asked “Hey, you don’t by any chance like fireworks, do you?”
“Yes!” She jumped.
“I was thinking, maybe we could go to the park and watch some tonight. What do you say?”
Jen couldn’t contain herself. She was already running around the room. “Really? You mean we can actually see some?”
“Only if you really want to,” he teased her.
“I want to! I want to!” she shrieked.
“Oh, it’s okay. I can tell you don’t really want to. We can just stay inside and watch a boring movie.” He gave a sly smile and winked at me. Why did he have to be so good with Jen? I wanted to remind him that he was just my bodyguard for the night, not her surrogate father.
“No!” She pouted, adding “I want to see the fireworks! Please Mom? Can we go? Please?”
“I don’t know…” I played along. “You have a lot of homework this weekend.”
“No I don’t! Ms. Langford gave us the weekend off, you liar!” She stomped her right foot down onto the carpet. If it wasn’t so cute I would have told her to settle down. Of course, Lucas loved this little game.
“Okay, fine,” he said. “I’ll take you this once. But you have to promise to be good to your mother for the rest of your life,” he said.
“Aw, thanks,” I said sarcastically. Like that’ll happen.
“I promise! I swear on my best friend’s grave,” she exclaimed, running to the door to put her light-up, Velcro shoes on.
“Last one out is a rotten egg!” Lucas yelled, running slowly to the door. Jen pushed open the door and ran to the car.
The park was lit up and full of people for the 4th of July fireworks show. Everyone was there. Mrs. Dobbins from down the street, John Maskins from the post office, even Jen’s teacher was there waiting for that grand finale explosion. Just being outside with everyone made me realize how long it had been since I had done something like this with Jen. It’s not that I didn’t want to. But raising a kid alone and trying to kick old habits made it hard to find the energy.
The night was beautiful. When they turned off the park lights, we could see every star so clearly. It was as if there were an infinite set of solar systems just like ours, and maybe, just maybe they were staring back at our dot of existence. The 4th of July was supposed to be this big, patriotic celebration of explosions and winning the war against the British. But when I really thought about it, it was a celebration that we were still here. We had survived and overcome ourselves and we would continue to fight and celebrate for generations to come.
“I never got to do this as a kid,” Lucas admitted, as we sat on the grassy hill overlooking the waterfront. The reflection of sparklers and neon glow-sticks shined across the water in front of us, as kids pla
yed tag, oblivious to how small their lives were in the grand scheme.
“Mom, can I go play with my classmates?” Jen asked me. She never played with anyone her age. Normally, she just hung out with me at the house. I looked at Lucas for confirmation it was safe.
“I don’t see why not. Just stay nearby and don’t leave the park,” he said. I still felt worried after what happened earlier. “It’ll be okay. It would be a huge mistake if Cade stuck around. This place is loaded with cops. Not to mention, you have me now. And I carry a loaded gun wherever I go.”
“Great,” I sighed. “I’m with a psychopath. And what do you mean I have you now?” I asked. Jen ran off with her friends nearby and I made sure to keep my motherly eye on her at all times.
“I just mean that tonight you have me. Jeeze, don’t get so paranoid. It’s not like I like you or something,” he said, smiling.
“Like hell you don’t,” I muttered.
“We had our fun. No need to prolong everything just for the sake of doing it. Plus, I’m not really the settling-down type of guy. I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said the other night and, well, you were right. I’m in the fucking mafia. Love isn’t part of my story.”
“That’s not what I meant,” I sighed, feeling confused about everything. My emotions were going haywire. Maybe I was about to start my period or something. Ugh. Or maybe it was just the stress from today. I didn’t know how to react toward anything now. I laughed and pulled my hair back. “Okay, maybe it was what I meant. But I shouldn’t have been so harsh about it.”
“Stop trying to let me down easy. I’ve had plenty of guns put in my face. I’ve been shot at by Brazilian pimps and chased down by the federales in Mexico City. I think you telling me you want nothing to do with me is something I can get over.” He chuckled to himself.
“Well. I’m sorry. And if it’s any consolation, I do like you being around. When you leave this town, it’ll be boring again.”