An eternity seemed to pass before Adam finally released her, and, surfacing slowly from the storm of passion he had succeeded in arousing in her, she leaned weakly against him, trembling as his hands slid caressingly down to her hips and up again to cup the soft swell of her breasts.
'I've proved my point, haven't I?'
Those words were like a douche of iced water in the face, making her realise with stinging clarity just where she was, and what she was doing. With humiliation burning through her like a slow fire, she jerked herself away from him and sought refuge in the uncontrollable anger that was rising within her.
'The only thing you've proved is that, by making use of your superior strength, you're capable of forcing any woman into submission!'
That harsh mouth, which had created such havoc with her emotions, twisted cynically. 'Was it my superior strength that made you respond so passionately and willingly to my kisses?'
Lisa wished the earth would cave in beneath her, but nothing happened. Adam was there, witnessing her humiliation, and enjoying it, no doubt, while she would have given anything at that moment to be able to deny the truth.
'I think you're the most hateful man I've ever met, and if it were not for the twins—'
'If it were not for the twins, I wouldn't tolerate you in my- home,' he interrupted coldly. 'Remember that.'
Lisa flinched inwardly. No one could have put her more firmly in her place, and with such cruel precision that she was left in no doubt as to what he thought of her. Adam despised her, but, as she stared desolately after his tall, re-treating figure with Rolf close at heel, she knew that she had only herself to blame.
The weather changed towards the end of November, and the heat became unbearable. The veld lay shimmering and parched beneath the merciless rays of the sun, and Lisa felt herself wilting like the vegetation. 'Hot and dusty,' she recalled her disparaging reply to her aunt's remarks, but there was also a certain beauty about the Karoo at this time of the year, Erica Vandeleur informed Lisa during a trip into town one morning with the twins in order to buy their school uniforms.
'After the first good rains,' Mrs Vandeleur explained, 'the veld comes alive with an amazing and colourful variety of wild flowers, and if you're not careful, you'll find yourself becoming enchanted with this part of the country just as I did so many years ago.'
Lisa could not argue with her, for already the Karoo had her in its clutches and, hot and dusty as it might have been at that moment, she was beginning to dread returning to the city. Nowhere could the sunsets be more spectacular, nor the stars more brilliant at night, and if, in a moment of weakness, she were asked to choose, she would choose to remain where the dew lay heavy on the earth in the early morning while the sweet, pungent smell of the Karoo bush permeated the air. Mrs Vandeleur was right, she decided wryly. She would have to take care, or the enchantment of the Karoo would make the parting so much more painful, and having to part from the children was something she did not even want to contemplate as yet.
Her thoughts were cut short as Beaufort West lay before them, and the shopping expedition eventually turned out to be far less laborious than she had imagined it would be. She had driven to town quite often during her stay at Fairview, and she had mostly taken the children with her in her little Fiat. After browsing through the shops in a leisurely fashion in search of the things she required, she usually treated the twins to an ice-cream in a tea-room, but shopping with Erica Vandeleur was quite a different matter. She knew exactly where to go, and, judging by the treatment they received, Adam and his mother were well-known, respected, and obviously of some importance in the town and district. A little overcome with awe, Lisa moved into the background, but there was no delay in purchasing what they required, and before the twins could become fidgety with boredom, they were on their way back to Fairview with the boot of Adam's grey Mercedes loaded with parcels.
'Gosh, I can't wait to go to school!' Josh declared excitedly when they finally reached the homestead and were opening up the parcels containing their new clothes and school uniforms, but Kate remained a little apprehensive.
'I wish we didn't have to go to boarding school,' she said, her lips quivering slightly.
'You'll soon get used to it, and you'll enjoy it,' Lisa assured her as she lowered herself on to the bed and drew Kate close against her. 'You'll have so many new friends to play with, and then there's always the weekends to look forward to when you'll be allowed to come home.'
'Will you fetch us in your car, Lisa?'
'No, Josh,' Lisa smiled at him, but her smile was tinged with sadness. 'I shan't be here any more, remember?'
'Why not?' Kate demanded, her eyes as wide and questioning as her brother's, and Lisa swallowed down the lump that rose in her throat.
'I shan't be here because I shall be going back to Cape Town when you start school.'
'But we'll miss you,' they chorused anxiously, and Lisa's heart swelled with love for them as she hugged them close in an attempt to hide the film of tears in her eyes.
'I'll miss you too,' she admitted, kissing them tenderly on the cheeks.
There was a knock at the door and Lisa looked up to see Daisy entering the children's room.
'Master Adam sent me to tell you that there's a gentleman to see you. Miss Lisa.'
Lisa frowned. 'A gentleman to see me, Daisy?'
'Yes, Miss Lisa.'
'I'll be down in a minute,' Lisa dismissed her after a thoughtful pause, and as the door closed behind Daisy's plump, neatly clad figure, she issued a warning to the twins. 'Don't get up to any mischief while I'm away. I won't be long.'
After a hasty check on her appearance, Lisa went downstairs. Who would want to see her? And why? There was a nervous flutter at the pit of her stomach as she paused on the threshold of the living-room, but, as she recognised the fair, lean young man standing with his back to the door while he spoke to Adam, she drew her breath in sharply and felt the blood drain from her face. 'Rory!'
CHAPTER SEVEN
Lisa was hardly aware that she had spoken as she ventured a few paces further into the room, but as Rory Phillips swung round to face her, her eyes involuntarily sought Adam's to find his expression curiously shuttered.
'Lisa darling!'
Rory seemed to leap at her from across the room and, before she could prevent it, he had swung her up in his arms and was kissing her hard and passionately on the mouth.
Adam had gone when she finally managed to extricate herself from Rory's arms and, when she stared at the door he had closed so silently behind him, Lisa felt sick with embarrassment, and something else she could not define.
'Was it necessary for you to behave like that in front of Mr Vandeleur?' she berated Rory coldly.
'Oh, come now, Lisa,' he laughed off her remark, his grey eyes moving appreciatively from her corn-coloured hair, which was now long enough to be coiled loosely into her neck, down to her slender, sandalled feet. 'It's not like you to be so standoffish, my darling.'
Lisa suppressed her rising irritation. 'Who told you I was working here?'
'I met your mother in town a few days ago and she gave me your address,' he explained, and then a rueful expression flashed across his lean, handsome face. 'Lisa, I've been an absolute cad to you.'
She stiffened. 'What happened is best kept in the past, Rory, and there's no need for you to feel bad about anything.'
'You have forgiven me, then?' he demanded eagerly.
'Of course.'
That engaging smile she remembered so well lit up his face, but it no longer had the power to stir her. 'My darling, I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear you say you've forgiven me.'
Lisa was instantly on her guard, and she knew the reason for this when she saw his hand dip into his jacket pocket to emerge a second later with a small velvet-lined box between his fingers. 'Rory—'
'I have your ring here, Lisa. It should never have come off your finger in the first place. Give me your hand.'
Lis
a stepped back hastily with a feeling of distaste. 'No, Rory.'
'Lisa?'
There was uncertainty and an almost childlike confusion on every line of his features and, as Lisa stared up at him, she wondered how she could ever have imagined herself in love with him. He was handsome, she had to admit, but he had always been arrogantly aware of the fact that his appearance would get him what he wanted, and now, faced with her refusal, he obviously found it impossible to accept that his looks would not work the same old magic.
'I'm sorry, Rory,' she said with absolute conviction, 'but I don't want to become engaged to you again.'
'I know I treated you badly, Lisa, but don't be so hard on me,' he said persuasively, his confidence returning with remarkable swiftness.
'I apologise if you think I'm being hard on you, but I don't want to wear your ring again,' she persisted, trying a little unobtrusively to increase the distance between them, but Rory followed her laughingly.
'Come now, Lisa, you know you love me.'
'I know nothing of the kind!' she flared hotly, the scar on her face becoming livid.
'Don't deny it, my sweet,' he continued, calmly removing a chair she had placed between them. 'You love me, but I presume you feel you have to punish me in some way.'
'I'm not trying to punish you at all,' she argued, but her statement ended in a gasp as Rory, with unexpected speed, strode across the space dividing them and caught her in his arms. 'Let me go, Rory!' she insisted furiously.
'I'll prove to you that you still love me,' he murmured thickly, and she saw his eyes, dark with a remembered passion, before he lowered his head and sought her lips with his.
Lisa fought against him wildly, twisting her head from side to side to escape his mouth, but his hot, passionate lips found her slender throat, and a shudder of revulsion shook through her. If she had harboured any doubts as to her feelings for this man, then she certainly had none now. Her love for Rory was dead; so dead, it might never even have existed.
'Let me go!' she cried, and, summoning every ounce of strength she possessed, she thrust him from her with a look of disgust on her face.
'Lisa…' he began incredulously, staggering slightly and breathing heavily as he stood facing her. 'I don't know you like this.'
Lisa controlled the shudders that raced through her with difficulty. 'I don't want your kisses, Rory.'
'My God, there was a time when you couldn't get enough of them!' he exploded, taking out his handkerchief and wiping the perspiration from his forehead and upper lip.
'Yes, I know,' she admitted, lowering her glance ashamedly. 'But that was before the accident.'
'Darling—'
'Please, Rory,' she interrupted hastily. 'I don't want to hurt you unnecessarily, but I don't love you, and I know now that I never really loved you.'
'How can you say that!'
'It's the truth, Rory.' She gestured expressively with her hands. 'Our marriage would have been a mistake; a dreadful mistake.'
'How can you be so sure of that?'
'I am sure, Rory. Believe me, I am.'
His eyes narrowed speculatively. 'Is there someone else?'
She shook her head. 'There's no one.'
'This Vandeleur chap,' he began suddenly. 'You haven't fallen for him, have you?'
'Don't be ridiculous!' she gasped indignantly, ignoring the odd behaviour of her heart at his suggestion. 'Mr Vandeleur is my employer, and nothing more.'
'Are you certain of that?' he persisted a little cynically. 'It wouldn't be the first time a girl fell in love with her boss, you know?'
'Rory…' For some obscure reason she could not look him in the eyes just then. 'Please just accept the fact that I don't love you any more. I'm sorry you had to come all this way for nothing, but a telephone call would have saved you the trouble.'
'I won't accept that you no longer love me,' he bit out the words a little anxiously. 'You're still just a little confused, and your mother explained that you were still having problems with your hip. When you're completely well you'll feel differently, you'll see.'
'I won't feel different, and I don't need time to reconsider, Rory,' she replied cuttingly, angry now that he should be so persistent. 'I had plenty of time to consider my feelings for you during those long weeks in hospital, and while I was convalescing at home.'
He spread out his hands in an appealing gesture. 'But why, Lisa?'
She stared at him in detached silence for a moment. She had no desire to rake up the past, but it seemed as though she would have to, or Rory would remain unconvinced, and as she started to speak, she felt again the bitterness and the pain of disillusionment.
'The expression on your face when you came to see me in hospital was enough to make me realise that you never really loved me, Rory. If you'd loved me as much as you'd said you did, then it wouldn't have mattered to you what I looked like. I admit I wasn't exactly a pretty sight then, but underneath it all I was still the same person, only that didn't interest you. I returned your ring to you, and you walked out of my life. Oh, yes…' the hint of cynicism in her smile prevented him from interrupting her, 'I can accept the fact that shock may have made you react in the way you had, but if it had been only shock, then you would have been back long before today.' Her deep blue eyes flashed with derisive mockery. 'What did my mother tell you, Rory? Did she tell you that my scars were not as repulsive as you imagined they would be?'
A dull red colour stained his cheeks and, probably for the first time in his life, he looked embarrassed and uncomfortable, but he had the grace not to deny her allegations. 'I'm only human, Lisa, and I have my faults.'
'I'm only human too, Rory, and I, too, have my faults, but if I've discovered anything about myself over these past months, then it's the certainty that I never loved you. What I felt for you was infatuation. I found you attractive, and you were fun to be with, but marriage is a lifetime of living together, and it demands more than just a superficial attraction to survive.'
'Are you certain you haven't fallen in love with someone else?'
'No, I haven't,' she shook her head adamantly, 'but when I do, it won't be because of the man's outward appearance. It's what's inside that matters most.'
'Lisa—'
'Go back to Cape Town, Rory,' she interrupted tiredly, turning away from him to stare out into the garden and beyond, to where the sheep flocked together beneath a thorn tree in search of protection from the stinging rays of the midday sun. 'Find someone else to wear your ring, and… be happy, Rory.'
'Do you really mean that?'
'I really mean it,' she said quietly, turning to face him again, and something in her calm, unwavering glance must have finally convinced him that his pleas were fruitless.
'Then I suppose there's nothing else to do except to wish you happiness as well,' he said at last with quiet acceptance, taking her hand in his and looking down at it a little forlornly. 'Goodbye, Lisa.'
He hesitated briefly, almost as if he still hoped she might change her mind, and then he was striding from the room and out of the house to where he had parked his car in the driveway.
Lisa sought refuge from the heat in a cool, refreshing swim after lunch while the children were resting. The weather was too oppressive for her to remain indoors, and Rory's visit that morning had upset her more than she had imagined at first. He had made her aware again of the way she limped, and of the scars which had gradually ceased to matter in the company of people like Adam Vandeleur and his mother. As long as she lived she would never be able to forget the look in Rory's eyes that day he had come to see her in hospital, and the bitterness welled up inside her again to gnaw away at her soul.
In an effort to rid herself of her thoughts she swam several lengths energetically before she simply floated on her back with her eyes closed against the sun. She stayed like that for quite some time, forcing herself to think of nothing but the coolness of the water, and the cicadas shrilling loudly in the heat of the day.
'If only
it would rain!' she thought, recalling suddenly a conversation between Adam and Ken Rudman when they had discussed the crippling effect which another season of drought could have on many of the farmers in the district. She had never given the matter much thought before, but when she heard Adam expressing his concern for those less fortunate than he, she listened with quiet interest. The numerous windmills she had seen on the farm provided the soil with subterranean water, making irrigation possible in this area where the rainfall was generally low, but ignorance and insufficient planning often resulted in severe losses. Water was a vital necessity, Lisa discovered, and she felt ashamed to think of the needless waste she had often witnessed in the city.
Birds fluttered from their perch on the overhanging brandies of the willow tree, interrupting the flow of her thoughts, and then some sixth sense warned her that she was not alone. She opened her eyes slowly, and her heart leapt into her throat when she saw Adam standing on the edge of the pool. His tall, muscular body was clad in swimming briefs, and his skin had been evenly tanned to a deep ochre. He obviously swam often, she realised absently, but it was not his physical appearance that troubled her at that moment; it was something in that narrow-eyed observation that made her turn and strike out frantically towards the opposite side of the pool. When her hands touched the side, however, Adam surfaced beside her, and the violent thudding of her heart almost choked her when one hard arm encircled her waist, preventing her from raising herself out of the water.
'What's the rush?' he demanded close to her ear.
'I've been here long enough already,' she replied, keeping her back turned resolutely towards him while she brushed the wet strands of hair out of her eyes.
'Another few minutes wouldn't matter, surely?'
'The children—'
'Are resting up in their room, as you should have been doing at this moment,' he finished for her sternly.
'I was too restless.'
'You're still restless,' he observed, taking in her futile attempts to escape him. 'Stop fidgeting.'
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