I laid down on the couch, watching an old horror movie on the television that sits a few feet away. Vince comes up in front of the couch and slides himself behind me, pulling me closer against him. I reveled anytime he did this, craving his touch and the safety net that I felt whenever his arms were around me. The man made me feel so much. While I constantly worried about the what ifs, I became happy with my day to day life and happy with the normal feeling that began to wash over me. Vince did make me feel safe, he always had a way of doing that whenever I was around him. The only person who made me fearful of my own safety was Rage, and he wasn’t here, so it only made sense that I learn to live in the moment and not in fear. After all, is living in fear even living at all?
About halfway through the movie I move my body around to face him, looking into those dark hazel eyes that always seem to captivate me, even when we were kids.
“What’re you thinking in there?” he asks, smirking as he taps his index finger against the back of my head.
“Just about how much I want things to be like they are right now, right in this moment. Just you and me doing something as pointless as laying here together on this couch. I am still scared, but you do something to me that I’ve never quite experienced. You take it all away.” I stumble my words out, not quite sure what I’m really trying to say to him. There is so much history behind Vince and I. Sometimes it feels like I don’t even have to over explain myself because he knows me so well, practically reading my mind.
“It’s my job, firefly. My only regret is that I didn’t act much sooner. I won’t hold that back, or the fact that I feel like so much of what happened to you was my fault. That guilt eats up at my insides every single day,” he mutters, pressing his lips against the top of my forehead.
“None of it was your fault. The only person who deserves blame is Rage, not me, and sure as hell not you. He knew exactly what he was doing, and I felt trapped. You pulled me from my prison, Vince. Do you even understand the power of what you did for me?” I ask, scooting up further so I’m face to face with him, staring him dead in the eyes.
His eyes dance with my own, and he says nothing.
“You saved my life.” One small statement, and we both know the weight it holds. I’m not exaggerating. He did it, he lifted me off that pavement and took me to the hospital, and while I lost my son, I was able to be saved. If he hadn’t of come back when he did I have no doubt in my mind that I would be dead, and if he didn’t offer to take me away from the Demons of Hell, the life – I would’ve ended up in the ground sooner or later, that I am sure of.
“Because of my inability to act, you lost that baby, that is on my hands.” I can hear how much he believes it in the tone of his voice, how the guilt is crushing him. I’ll be damned if I allow him to think like this.
“No, and don’t you dare say that to me. Rage did that. Not you. Not me. Rage. He was the one who bloodied me, beat me until I was barely breathing and killed my son, and Vincent. I never want to fucking hear you say that ever again.” My voice cracks, breaking down as I speak each word. I use Vince’s full name to show my seriousness on the issue, knowing that he will understand he needs to listen and accept what I’m saying to him.
I graze my hand slowly over his unshaved cheek, skimming against the barely there hairs that have come to peek up over the last couple days. He sighs, which means he’s accepting what I said. I don’t even realize I’m crying until I feel the tears cascading over my cheeks, what he said… how he just took all of that guilt… it destroyed me. Not one part of what happened was any of his fault. He was my savior in all of this.
He meets his lips against mine, folding softly over my own, caressing each other like we’re kissing for the first time. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but he was always so gentle with me, almost afraid I would break if he got too rough.
I slide my leg over his hip and straddle him, leaning down as he turns his body towards mine. Swiftly, I meet his lips, not wanting to be away from him any longer. I run my hands over his chest, feeling the soft cotton of his plain black tee shirt, going back down to his belt I run my hands under his shirt, feeling his chiseled abs against the palm of my hands.
“Sweetheart, this is not heading in the direction you want it to,” I feel his words vibrate against my lips, and as they register I instantly become irritated.
I slide my hand over his jeans, feeling his hard cock pressing against the fabric. “Sure feels like it is.”
“I’m not fucking you, firefly.”
“What the fuck do you mean by that?” I snap out, glaring at him. Is he afraid to fuck me because I’m tainted from not only what Rage did to me, but what the others did as well?
Vince rises, snaking his hand behind my back and pulls me higher up on his lap. I can feel his cock pressing against my center, and it’s pure torture, a teasing, wanting torture. “I’m no doctor, but I can tell you that I know I can’t fuck you yet. It’s way too soon. Your body needs to heal more. But baby, when I can… you’d better fasten your seatbelt. I won’t go easy on you cause you’re mine now, you understand?” My heart beats a thousand miles a minute in pure excitement from the words he just spewed. Even when we were kids all I wanted was to be his, and now here we are, years later.
“Yes,” is the only word I can muster up, my heart pounding in my chest so hard that I can feel it in my head. I rub my hand against his cock, watching him as he clenches his teeth and hisses out in pleasure. He doesn’t say anything, but stares at me so harshly I think he’s incinerating right through me.
I place my hands over the button of his jeans and unzip him, pulling his cock free and stroking it, squeezing firmly at the base and working my way up slowly. “Dammit, Rox…” he mutters, cursing at me in frustration while his eyes say something else entirely. I lean down and place my lips over his cock, bobbing my head up and down over his wide member. I’ve given a lot of men head, but never anyone quite as thick as Vince. He’s massive and could very well break me in half when he does decide to fuck me.
I swirl my tongue around his head, using my hand to squeeze him at the base, moving in unison bringing him closer to the edge that I so badly want him to fall from. If he isn’t going to fuck me right now, he’s damn well going to be giving me something I want, and all I want right now is his pleasure.
I force my head further down his length until I feel him sliding down my throat. I gag for a moment, eyes watering, and he begins to move his hips, fucking my mouth just like I wanted. I slide my hand into his pants and put pressure on his balls, fondling them as he fucks my mouth. His panting grows heavier, cock twitching in my mouth, and I know he’s on the brink of exploding. Quickly, I grip him harder, squeezing his balls until I hear his moans, tasting the precum and the warm liquid that shortly follows shooting down my throat. He growls and hisses as he comes, panting heavily and falling back onto the couch when he’s finished. I slip my mouth from his cock, swallowing his load and fall into place snugly next to him. That’s the last thing I remember before the darkness takes me.
Chapter 12
Fire burns brighter in the dark.
– The Hunger Games
Tex
I wake up, feeling like I’ve just awoken from a dream, but quickly my senses take ahold of me, and I know that something is wrong – very wrong. My nostrils flare at the smell of burning. I open my eyes, glancing in front of me to see Roxy snuggly asleep in my arms, next my eyes dart to the door and around the cabin.
That’s when I notice the intense flames taking hold of my house, growing up the wall, engulfing anything in its path.
As if my instincts take ahold of me, I grab Roxy, pulling her up into my arms and jolt her awake. I hear her words but drown them out. The only thing I am concerned about in this moment is getting both her and I out of here alive. The front door isn’t an option, the flames are too close and no doubt we would burn ourselves trying to get out. I turn and look towards the back door, running to it and pulling on the handle. It�
��s warm, but it doesn’t burn. I yank the door, noticing how it isn’t budging.
“What the fuck” I mutter, from the outside glass I can see nails perforating the wood.
We’ve been nailed shut in the house.
Fuck!
“Vince!” I hear her scream at me, looking at her I see the terrified expression covering her face. There is no hiding this from me. I don’t even know if she’s trying to in this moment. Fuck, I thought that by taking her away it meant she’d be safe, and she kept telling me something would happen. I should have been more prepared that it actually would, but instead, I wasn’t. Instead, I assured her time and time again that she’d be fine.
I think hard, forgetting about the fact my basement has a massive window that I was supposed to get fixed eons ago. It was bigger than it should have been, and I just kept pussy footing around the issue, even with the mortar on the sides flaking off. It gave me a nasty draft in the winter, but this could be our golden ticket out of here.
I race down the hall, turning and rush down the stairs with Roxy in tow until we hit the back wall. She’s still speaking to me, and I continue to drown her out. While I am worried about what she’s feeling, I know that I can reassure her later. The most important thing is that we get out of here – right fucking now.
I set Roxy down and try to open the window, pulling it to the left, and it doesn’t budge.
Fuck it.
We aren’t waiting any longer. I turn, and before I can think about what to do next I see Roxy throwing a cinderblock through it. The window sits a little bit around waist level, so I know we can both get through it without a problem.
Damn, I couldn’t help but smile in this moment. My girl’s a smart little vixen.
I grab a blanket I have sitting on a table next to the window and wrap her up in it, trying to protect her body as much as possible from the jagged edges. “Climb through, I’ll be right behind you” I assure her, helping her get through.
I don’t waste a second climbing through right behind her, the glass digging into my skin with every inch that I move. I pull myself through, digging my nails into the dirt, dragging myself out of my home which is burning more and more with every second.
I reach around and feel for my gun, satisfied when it’s still sitting pretty in the back of my jeans. Fuck, if I’d lost that thing I’d be screwed right now.
The moment I rise I see something that I wasn’t planning for – but something that Rox was.
Rage.
Smiling like the sinister fuck he is, and he didn’t come alone. He brought someone who Rox and I both know very well.
“Hal!” Roxy screams, looking at her bloodied and bruised friend. There’s no doubt in my mind that Rage has done a number on him. He holds Hal by the back of his neck on his knees, dried blood covering his face. His jaw is protruding, which tells me that it’s broken. I can only imagine the things that Rage had to do to get Hal to tell him anything. Out of anyone, he is the most loyal of friends, and I know he would never intentionally tell Rage anything unless there was no other choice.
Hal tries to speak, but out comes inaudible words “I-mm hads tooos thventened faamiiily” Through each word he tries to speak I can see the pain in his eyes. He has to be feeling it badly right now, I’ve had a broken jaw, so I know the struggle all too well.
“He threatened his family,” Roxy whispers it, and I glance over to her, moving closer to try to snake my hand around her back. I need her to feel like she’s safe right now, like we aren’t in the cluster fuck situation that we’re in.
“Ah, ah. I wouldn’t do that if I were you. One more step closer to my wife, and good ol’ Hal here gets a bullet straight through his head,” Rage sneers, staring at Rox as he speaks every promised word.
Roxy and I both stay silent, breathing like clockwork in complete unison.
“Did you really think I wouldn’t know? That someone wouldn’t tell me?” He laughs at us, walking around Hal he pulls a gun out and places it to his temple, causing the man to cry.
“No, no!” Roxy begs, taking a step forward but stopping. I give her a look, telling her not to move a fucking inch. The moment she gets close to him, is the moment she is as good as dead. She and I both know this.
“How long has it been going on? How long have you been fucking what’s mine? You never could let her go, not back then… I wonder how long you two have held this charade up. Both of you too dumb to know that I’d notice.”
“Rox hasn’t been yours for a long fucking time, brother,” I hiss through clenched teeth, balling my fists at his accusations. “Hard for her to be yours when all you do is bring her on death’s doorstep, isn’t it?”
Rage cackles at me, looking to her. “You’ve always been mine, haven’t you, bitch? Even back then you didn’t want him. You wanted me, and I could see it so clearly. Get over here, Roxanne, I’m not asking.” He presses the gun further into Hal’s skull, and Rox whimpers, starting to move towards him.
Fuck.
No.
I’ll be damned if I let her go back.
I don’t think. I simply react in the circumstances that I find myself in, pulling my gun from my back and aiming it right at Rage I take a shot and he goes down. “Car, Rox!” I yell, she glances back at me as she starts to go for Hal, but it is too late as another shot rings out.
I freeze.
Every particle inside of me goes still, and when she continues to run I take a deep breath, the only comfort I find is seeing her friend fall to the ground in front of me.
Rage holds his gun towards me and gets a shot off, winging my leg. I falter, leaning over, biting my lip as the pain spreads through my body. I shoot a few more times in his direction as I begin to run, trying my best to catch up with her. I turn back slightly and don’t see him within sight. This could be a good or a bad thing.
Weaving in and out through trees, I follow the path, running as fast as possible, the adrenaline in my body kicking in. I feel the pain, but what matters more in this moment is getting to that fucking car and making sure we both get out of here alive. I curse myself in this moment, hating that I parked the car so fucking far away.
When I get there, I’m relieved, she has it running and is sitting in the driver’s side staring back. That smile lights up as she sees me, only in that moment I hear another shot, feeling warm liquid spread through the right side of my stomach. I turn back, firing off another couple rounds, taking every ounce of energy left in me to get in that car. When I make it the doors already open, and I fall into the seat.
Roxy tears out of the woods onto the road, taking off her shirt and giving it to me. “You need to stay alive. You do NOT get to die on me today, Vincent.”
Her idle threat is the last thing I remember.
Chapter 13
She loves hard because she knows how it feels to be loved so little.
– iliketoquote.com
Roxy
I’m not a very religious woman, but today I think I transformed into one. I prayed over and over through the drive to Montana. Vince stayed awake for a while, and even though his words didn’t make much sense, I knew that him being awake and talking was a good thing. The second he passed out is when I began to worry. I could see the blood loss, it was evident, and by the time we arrived, it looked like a murder was committed inside of his car. I drove well over the speed limit, hitting about a hundred and ten on the interstate. Surprisingly enough, I wasn’t pulled over at all.
I didn’t give a rat’s ass if an officer tried to pull me over. The fact of the matter is that he’d have to chase me down to my brother’s club, guns a blazing.
The moment I spotted the Reapers MC clubhouse, I drove straight through the rusty old piece of shit gate they had up, not giving a damn. I didn’t have the luxury of time or being well mannered. The only thing I was focused on was getting Vince help, the kind I could actually trust.
I slam on the brakes and bring the car to a sudden stop, unbuckling my seatbelt and teari
ng out of the driver’s side, running over to the passenger side to get to Vince.
A gust of wind came from nowhere, blowing me further into the car as I try to maintain my balance and wrap my arm around him. It was no use, Vince was a big guy, and I couldn’t do this by myself. I turn around and see a group of men surrounding me, finding my voice, I tell them exactly what I need. “What the hell are y’all standing around for! Give me some fucking help!” A few of them look at me funny, and two men come darting over and help get Vince out of the car.
“What in God’s name is going on here?” I recognize his booming voice as he walks through the crowd towards me. It’s not just any man. It’s my brother, the Prez of the Reapers MC.
Lloyd “Fist” Monroe has changed greatly since the last time I had seen him, no longer was he an immature boy. Now, he’s a strong man, reminding me a lot of his father, Boone.
“Roxanne?” He speaks my name lowly, blinking a few times as he gives me a once over. It’s been so long I’m surprised that either of us can recognize one another. We were kids the last time we saw each other, and it was only because our fathers felt it was important that we met. Without him and Cracker, I was an only child. My mother didn’t do many things right, but I did have to be thankful for the fact she gave me two older brothers – two brothers who I knew would step up when the time called for it.
“Lloyd…,” I mutter, the emotions finally getting to me. I’ve had to hold my shit together for so long, and now I feel as if I may break down into a billion tiny pieces in front of him.
He takes long strides over to me and places his arms on my shoulders, giving me a good squeeze. “What the hell happened?” He looks at Vince as he speaks to me and I just cannot bear to explain everything right now. I don’t have the energy for it.
“Please, help him,” I whisper it out, like a soft cry.
“You got it, kid. Anything for you.” Lloyd throws his hand up in the air, and men come from behind him to help get Vince. “Get the Doc, now!”
Scarred (Demons of Hell MC Book 1) Page 7