Reach deep inside. You have always been a fighter, always been a survivor. But your heart has become softer and your desire to fight has diminished. You must search deep within, Little Warrior.
Emilie felt the urge to cry, but the surge of anger that arose within her overcame it. “I will find a way! I will find a way out of this place I am trapped in and find Tamaryn, and the thing I have forgotten. I must!”
Emilie stood up, resolute, feeling strength growing warm and hot in her belly for the first time in many years. As she did so, she saw a small glow of light in front of her the size of a pinhole, which became larger the longer she stared. She realized as the light grew, she was staring at her father, all seven feet nine of him. She gasped as she reached for him and realized he was solid in front of her.
“Father!” she rushed into his arms, feeling the strength of them as they wrapped around her. She felt like a small girl, enveloped in his embrace, as she had for so many years as his child and student. “Father, I have missed you so much!”
“And I have missed you, Emilie,” he said, his voice rich and deep, his beard tickling her forehead like it did when she was a little girl. “You are and always were the most important thing I have ever done in all of my life. This connection we share from the Great Beyond has been a gift that only those who truly love one another are permitted to share.”
“I don’t know how you are here with me and I don’t care. I’m happy to have you here.” Emilie said, taking a step back from him but holding his hands tightly in hers. “Nothing is the same without you here with me. I desperately miss your guidance and strength. I am in shambles without you, especially now.”
“You forget, my Little Warrior …” her father said, looking down at her with the same dark gray eyes that were so much like her own. “I am always with you. You are never without me and you will never be without me as long as you have breath in your lungs. When you need me, all you have to do is reach deep within and find me there. I will give you all of the strength and guidance you ever need.”
“Can you stay?” Emilie’s voice was small. She knew the answer but needed to ask the question and hear it from his own lips.
“I cannot stay longer than a moment. The moment that reminds you of who you are. And once you have reached that moment, I will go. I’m no longer meant to be with you any longer, as much as I may want to stay.” Father’s eyes were kind, and Emilie basked in the warmth of them for as long as she could. “Do you know who you are, child?”
Emilie nodded, not wanting to blink despite the tears that were blinding her for fear he would disappear. “I think so. I know that I am your child, a strong Warrior, a Governess, a Leader, but there is so much more and I know that I am so close to realizing what that is. You’ve opened my heart and my eyes as you always do. I remember my strength … I know I can find my way home, now. Father … will I see you again?”
“That depends. Only if you need me again. You have not called on me in many years, but when you call me from your heart, my spirit has no choice but to find you. All you need to do is close your eyes and listen with your own spirit and I will be there. I will always love you as you love me.”
“And I, you.” Emilie watched as the light that emanated from him began to glow bright and he began to fade. Her heart ached for him to stay, but she knew he could not. She watched until he was gone completely, frozen in place for fear the light would go with him.
Emilie breathed a sigh of relief as the light remained. She took a moment to survey her surroundings and saw it was familiar. She was back in the misty, barren woods she originally found herself in upon her original awakening. She looked for Sonya and Paola, but saw no sign of them anywhere. She walked on, reflecting on what her father had said.
There is something you have forgotten … all of Tamaryn has forgotten … I am always with you … You have not called on me in many years … there is something you have forgotten … all of Tamaryn has forgotten … I am always with you … You have not called on me in many years …
The word echoed over and over in her mind.
Suddenly, Emilie stopped walking, frozen in her steps. She stopped, unable to move or breathe as her nerve endings tingled uncontrollably. A memory so sharp and intense exploded inside of her as she remembered the last time she had called on her father the last time she had needed him. It had been the night she nearly died.
And like a sharp dagger ripping its way through her heart, she realized what she had forgotten.
42
THE HEALER
Anabel screamed as she watched Jakob and the Terato fly off the cliff.
She and the other children ran to the edge as close as they dared. Nothing but clouds of rocks, dust, and dirt flew up at them, stinging their eyes and lungs, blinding them. Anabel strained to see anything and realized that he was gone. The other children were crying uncontrollably, and for once, Ava was stunned into silence.
Serah held Kell’s hand as the tears streamed silently down his dirt-covered face, and even the Patronus did not speak or move. The air was still and silent as the dust settled and the air went back to the misty fog that they had all grown accustomed to.
“He’s gone,” Kell said, finally breaking the silence. “Jakob is gone.”
Ava grabbed him suddenly and held tight, touching him for the first time since they were reunited. “Oh Kell … I will take care of you, now.”
“I don’t need you to take care of me,” Kell said angrily, pulling away from her embrace. “You have never cared for me. Jakob has always looked out for me, but not you. I don’t need you.”
Ava stepped back with hurt in her dark eyes as she looked around at the rest of the children, her face turning red. She stepped away from the group and walked as far as she dared to the edge of the cliff, standing alone as she looked away.
A loud whimper made everyone jump, as Brooke could no longer stop herself. The blood from her wounds was running freely again as she lay on her side, her eyes half closed, panting heavily.
“Oh no, no,” Kell said running to her and lying next to her, tears falling as he cried. “Brooke, you cannot leave me too!”
“Don’t worry,” Brooke said, her sweet voice barely audible. “Zeeba and Zoe will be your Patronus now. They will watch out for you.”
“No! I don’t want them, Brooke. I want you. You!” Kell said, his voice pleading.
Anabel knelt next to him, slowly putting her arm around him though he did not feel it.
“I don’t … think I am meant to be in this place … any longer. I protected you … as much as I was meant to. Do … not … cry, I will be alright.” Brooke’s panting became even more labored as Kell hung his head and wept openly, unashamed.
Serah toddled up to him and smiled, her green eyes seeming to dance.
“Doggie. Okay.” She said, her voice thick and slow like she was talking through a puddle of mud.
“No, sweet girl,” Anabel said, sadly. “Doggie is not okay.”
“No! Doggie, okay.” Serah repeated pointing at Brooke.
“No …” Anabel started, trying to hold Serah’s hand. “Doggie is sick. She is going to the Great Beyond, now.”
Serah knelt next to Kell and looked up at him, her green eyes sparkling. For a moment, Kell forgot about his grief. She stared at him until her eyes drew him in. She put one chubby hand on his cheek and a sense of hope and happiness slowly washed over him. She moved her hand from his cheek and took Kell’s hand as she put her other hand on Brooke’s chest, ignoring the blood.
Suddenly, Serah began to hum and then sing unexpectedly, her voice fluid and musical. The music coming out of her mouth was unlike anything they had ever heard before, the words seemingly from another world. Claire, Philip, and Cal all stared, their mouths open wide. They had barely even heard their sister speak, and when she did, Mama had shushed her, not having the patience to try and decipher her words.
Zeeba and Zoe laid down, taking in the music, their eyes closed in what
seemed to be in concentration. Brooke laid still, the blood slowly disappearing from her white fur, dissipating into the air as it followed the sound of Serah’s music. Ava walked slowly toward Serah, sitting down next to her. Serah continued to sing as she let go of Kell’s hand and put her hand on Ava’s head. Ava began to cry, a heart wrenching sound as though her soul were being emptied of all of its pain. Serah smiled as she continued to pat her head.
All of the children stared at Brooke who lay perfectly still. Time passed slowly and nobody said a word, afraid to move or breathe.
“Is Brooke gone?” Claire asked Anabel.
They sat in silence for a long moment. Suddenly, Brooke’s leg twitched and the children jumped. They watched, astonished as Brooke sat up slowly, with no sign of battle visible on her body any longer.
Serah took both of her hands and placed them on the sides of Brooke’s face, still singing, her voice lower and quieter. Without warning, she stopped singing. “Okay, Doggie?” she asked, her green eyes searching Brooke’s brown ones.
Brooke looked at her, her mouth seeming to form a weak smile. “Doggie, okay,” she said, licking Serah’s face gratefully.
“Doggie, okay,” Serah squealed and clapped happily.
“She’s a Healer! Serah is a Healer,” Claire exclaimed. “We had no idea! Wait until Mama finds out.”
Philip and Cal stared at Serah with reverence. Serah sat down on Ava’s lap, contentedly patting her hand, unaware of the awe surrounding her. Healers had become rare, nearly extinct in Tamaryn. A Child of the Angels had never before been a Healer, and no one had ever suspected that Serah might be one.
“She has a unique and rare gift which we must protect at all costs,” Anabel spoke fiercely to Ava’s surprise. Ava nodded at Anabel in agreement, attempting a small smile.
“Are you good to travel?” Zeeba’s rich voice was directed toward Brooke.
“I believe so,” Brooke said, standing up and testing her limbs. She shook herself from head to tail. “I believe our little Angel has healed me completely. I feel … whole.”
All eyes went back to Serah who leaned drowsily against Ava.
“Then we should move. We need to find our way out of wherever we are. I don’t know that it is safe.” Zeeba said.
“What about Jakob? What if he comes back? Maybe he’s not gone. Maybe he’ll come back! We can’t leave if he is going to come back,” Kell cried out, helplessly.
Zoe rubbed her head against him, gently. “Kell, I’m sorry but Jakob is not coming back, not anymore. Jakob is gone. He sacrificed himself to save us, and he isn’t coming back.”
Kell ran to the edge of the cliff as fast as his legs would take him. He thought about racing Jakob and knew Jakob would be proud of how fast he had run. Zoe effortlessly ran after him, staying close. Kell stopped at the edge and stared down once more, searching for any sign of Jakob. He stared hard, straining to see anything, willing himself to see his brother, but instead all he saw was darkness.
Kell suddenly began running around, frantically gathering rocks and stones and piling them at the edge of the cliff. Ava and Anabel looked at one another questioningly. Philip and Cal began gathering rocks and stones, piling them onto the mound Jakob was creating. Silently, Claire began helping, and Ava realized that they were building a grave. She stood up cautiously as Serah slept on her shoulder, and carried her the distance to the makeshift gravesite with Anabel following closely behind them.
Kell continued to gather until the pile was as high as he was tall.
All at once he stopped, his face red and sweaty, his shirt dark with dirt and mud. “That’s enough.”
Brooke walked up behind him and stood as close to him as she could get, nudging him gently with her nose. He put his arm around her, his head down as he began to cry. Ava and Anabel stood next to one another, holding hands, tears rolling down their faces. No one dared to say a word.
The silence was broken only by the sound of weeping.
“Good-bye, Jakob,” Kell said looking into the sky. “I will find our way home, and I will tell Mama and everyone how brave you were. I promise that I’ll never forget you or let anyone else do so.”
It was at that very moment that the sky grew black, and the earth began to rumble once more.
43
THE DEATH OF THE WARRIOR
All at once the Warrior remembered when she had last called upon her father. She had been the Governess and was standing at the threshold of the Great Beyond, nearly ready to go through, lost to Will and her beloved Tamaryn forever.
The journey to the Great Beyond had been so simple. Her belly, swollen with child, was ready to explode. The Governess could feel the pain ravaging through her with each shallow breath. Will was helpless in her plight and had sent for the best Midwife in Tamaryn, but there hadn’t been word about her arrival yet. There was something wrong, and the Governess felt as though the child inside was ripping her apart. She had put down her sword and her right as a Warrior in order to be the Governess, but most importantly to be a mother, and she had not regretted it. But now, as her third child was about to arrive, she was heartbroken that her first-born, Jakob would have to live without his mother, and that his twin Ava would have to learn how to be a woman on her own. She loved Jakob’s curious, strong nature and had been looking forward to watching him grow, but as she realized she wouldn’t, she prepared herself to let go.
The pain was somewhere very deep and strong, and Emilie wasn’t sure how much more she could take before she let herself go through the threshold. Emilie gritted her teeth and held on.
“Oh Father,” she had cried. “What do I do? I cannot leave Will, Jakob, and Ava, but how do I stay? The pain is too much, and I fear I will succumb no matter what I do.”
Her father had come to her and held her hand while Will, who stood helplessly next to Emilie, could not see him. Hadley came bursting in the room and reported that the Midwife was on the way, but the weather was treacherous and it would take some time.
Will stroked Emilie’s hair, her forehead drenched in sweat as her body writhed in pain. “Em, tell me what to do. I’ll do anything you want me to do. Just tell me. I cannot lose you.”
Hadley stood before her, waiting and ready to help in any way she could. Still a young waif at the time, there wasn’t much she could do although she was willing.
Emilie watched the memory grow like a beautiful flower blooming, the pictures of her life developing in her head. She realized her mind had blocked all of it out until now, when she was ready to see it. The life she loved was so close in her mind, but she realized that she had been blinded to it. Slowly, she began to remember in shadows and soft layers. She felt her heart pound anxiously.
“Stay calm, Governor. All will be well,” Emilie spoke softly to him, her love. She didn’t want to alarm him but she felt the time for her to cross over as coming soon. “You must be strong for Jakob and Ava. They will need you more than ever. But all will be well, as this is simply part of life.”
Emilie could see her father still next to her bed, holding her hand as Will hovered over her and buried his face in her neck. Emilie could feel his tears on her skin as the pain in her belly came in red-hot waves that she tried in vain to disguise. Each wave threatened to overcome her and take her away, but she bore down as she knew to do, and held on for as long as she could.
Time passed and Emilie felt herself slowly crossing over the threshold, the pain diminishing as she did so. She smiled at Will as she stroked his thick hair. Jakob and Ava were in the room, too young to comprehend what was happening. “Mama, Mama, okay Mama?” Jakob repeated, trying to climb up on the bed with her as Hadley chased him around. Ava had been content in the corner playing with her dolls, too absorbed in her play to understand what was happening.
“Emilie, please don’t leave me,” Will pleaded. “The Midwife is on the way. Hold on just a little while longer. Please, I beg of you.”
Emilie nodded, grimacing, doing everything she could. She
wasn’t ready to leave, though the image of her father was beginning to become more solid in her eyes, and she knew that it might not be her choice for much longer.
The doors to the Governor’s chambers flew open violently, flapping about, and a woman and small child came rushing in, their cloaks soaked with rain from the raging storm. As the woman removed her cloak, the Governor realized the Midwife was also full with child.
“I-I-I’m so sorry we are late, Governor! The roads are horrendous with the storm and I’m afraid we couldn’t get here any faster. I had no choice but to bring my oldest, Anabel. But she is my good omen in matters such as these.” The woman was round and pretty with chestnut hair and green eyes, her daughter the very image of her.
“It’s okay, please … please … just help my wife. There is something terribly wrong and she is in such pain. She’s held on for as long as she can …” the Governor pleaded with her.
The little girl moved to the side of the bed, where Jakob stood. She looked at him solemnly and held out her hand, which Jakob took shyly but willingly.
Emilie groaned loudly, in pain.
“Hold on, dear. Let’s see what we have going on. I’m here to help you, if you’ll let me.” She lifted Emilie’s legs in one fluid practiced motion.
The Governor stood by holding Emilie’s hand, trying to hide the concern in his eyes. He couldn’t see what the Midwife was doing, but he knew that whatever it was failed to give Emilie any relief as her groans became louder and more desperate.
“Governor, I need you to hold the Governess tight. The baby’s feet are positioned near the entrance of the birth canal and I have to turn him around so he can come out properly, head first. This will cause her a great deal of pain, so you will need to hold her as tight as you can,” the Midwife’s voice came clear and strong over Emilie’s cries.
The Forgotten (The Lost Children Series Book 1) Page 17