I tip my head, and my gaze lands on his dick, quietly waiting for the next round. “They might think I’m easy.”
He disbelievingly laughs. “Easy? Christ. It’s taken me since my junior year to sleep with you. Not easy.”
Looking up, I smile at his exasperation. “You wanted to sleep with me then?”
He nods without hesitation. “I wanted to drive you, not the fucking car.”
I giggle, not intending to, but I can’t help it. “No, you didn’t.”
Skeptical, Jared asks, “You couldn’t tell? I was always some degree of hard around you.”
Smiling again, I shake my head. “I never noticed.”
He smirks. “I must’ve been awfully good at hiding it and distracting you when I couldn’t.”
“Wow. You must have.”
“Yeah. It was a process.” Jared’s fingers press into my back and he whispers, “No more hiding from you or distracting you now.”
My real smile dwindles in exchange for one that’s forced. I’ve opened Pandora’s Box.
Suddenly drained, I move to get in bed, but Jared clamps his legs onto me, holding me there. His eyes scour mine. “Just so you know—what we did? That was phenomenal.”
I take a deep breath and hold it, asking, “Is that what you say to all the girls you have sex with?”
His face crinkles and he shakes his head. “No. I’ve never said that before.”
“But you thought it?”
Still confused, he warily says, “No, Kit Kat. That was a first.” I love how he’s resumed calling me Kit Kat again so easily. I loved hearing him call me that in school.
Jared’s hands slide down to my hips, his thumbs smoothing over my nightshirt. He looks up at me, but his eyes subtly shift when he asks, “What did you think?”
I want to say I loved it and him, but I instead say, “It was unbelievable.” I lean my forehead against his and whisper over his face, “The best of my life, Jared.”
Almost as if on impulse, Jared slants his head to capture my lips. His mouth moves greedily over mine, and I have to keep up, while feeling eager twitching against my thigh, but as our kiss heightens, Dash’s voice is heard in the hallway, stealing our attention. Rio’s quieter response follows, and Jared sighs against my cheek.
He quietly says, “Don’t worry about them. It’s our business what we do.”
Watching the door like it’s going to blow open, I reply, “Not if we’re all in the same house for the weekend.” Jared kisses my cheek and I turn to him, his lips close to mine. “They’re bound to find out we slept together, and will have something to say about it.”
Jared’s lips brush mine as he whispers, “I’ll deal with them.”
He might, but he doesn’t even know what his friends already know and think.
After I rocked Jared into an orgasm outside, Rio stopped me in the hall as I went to get a shower.
“Hey. Everything good with you and Jare?”
I shrugged, but nodded. “I guess. It surprised me how upset he was. This was a bad idea.”
Rio crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall. “Oh, you know how little boys tease little girls when they like them. Some are even downright mean because they don’t know any better. Yeah. That’s our Jared Beckett.”
“You really think so?”
“I told you on the ride over, he’ll be glad you’re here. And he seems to be now. Jare has been mad at me plenty. Through college and up until three years ago, I had lived with him. When I got a job outside Baltimore and moved closer to work, he wouldn’t talk to me for months, and wouldn’t tell me why. I figured he was feeling abandoned, so I visited him a lot and he got over it. He had left Dash to move to Baltimore, so it seems Jared can only do the leaving. Not the other way around.”
“You and Dash are such good friends to him.”
He sighed. “We try, but there’s only so much we can do.”
“What makes you stay friends with him?”
“It’s not all his fault the way he is. His mother had a lot to do with it. Jare is a great guy, but he’ll argue that he’s not. He’s funny, he’ll do anything for his friends, and he’s a good listener, even if he doesn’t want us listening to his problems.”
“I wish we had kept in touch all these years, but he had my phone number then. He never called or looked back.”
“He never looked back because he never moved forward. Like I tell Dash, Jared is unconsciously conscious. He lives without knowing it.”
“Why does he do that?”
“The path of least resistance. Yet, that road’s only leading him to a lonely hell. He’s stuck in the past and now that his past is in his present, he’s losing it.”
“I wish there were something I could do to help him.”
Rio nodded. “There is.”
“What? Try to get him to talk? If he won’t talk to you, he’s not going to talk to me. He likes to keep things to himself.”
“True, but he’s way more apparent than he thinks he is. I knew about you before I actually met you at the club.”
“How? He actually mentioned me to you?”
Rio shook his head. “No way.”
“Dash mentioned me then?”
“Nope. Jared makes fun of me for laughing in my sleep, but when he gets drunk, he talks in his. Our freshman year in college, he was drunk more times than he was sober. He’d fall asleep on the couch and talk about Kat. How pretty she was, how she didn’t want him, how he missed her, and some other things. It was years later, and he was still talking about this mysterious Kat. One day, I asked him who Kat was, and he denied knowing. After that, he stayed in his room to drink. When I met you, I knew you were the one he was talking about.”
“He did that? He missed me? Since we’ve been hanging out again, he’s never once said he’s missed me. Maybe he hasn’t.”
Rio smiled with a skeptical laugh. “Jare thinks he may be good at keeping secrets, but he can’t hide his actions or reactions. His facial expressions or body language. He’s extremely bad at hiding those. You’ve affected him and he’s freaking out about how much.”
I looked out the window. “It doesn’t matter. He’ll be leaving soon, so he can calm down about how much.”
“Do you really think he’ll be able to now?”
“Why wouldn’t he be able to? He did it all these years.”
“Because now, he’s realizing how much he loves you.”
Stunned that Rio said that, I gasped and looked back to him. “Jared doesn’t believe in love.”
“Show Jared Beckett what love is. Convert him to a believer. He’ll catch on.”
Easier said than done.
Resisting the need to kiss Jared, and inevitably leading us to more meaningless sex for him, but more turmoil for me, I untangle myself from his legs and crawl into bed.
Sighing, he stands, grabbing his underwear and shorts, and I settle into the far side of the bed, facing the wall. He says, “I’ll be back.”
The tears quietly fall onto my cheek and pillow. If I keep crying around him without a good excuse, he’ll become suspicious and possibly, distant. More than he already is.
I can’t stomach the thought of him going to Philadelphia and having sex with other women, while I’m in Annapolis yearning for him to only share himself with me. I want him to tell me I’m his only love. Yet, that’s something I’ll never hear from him.
Quickly drying my tears, I remind myself that I’m in this situation totally on my own free will. I’m not a hostage. I could have chosen to only have casual contact with him at my mom’s or just in the car, but I didn’t. I kissed him and it lit a fire within, enlightening me of how much I loved him, and still do. Then I took Dash’s advice, and now it’s killing me that I got exactly what I hoped would happen with Jared. It’s both a dream come true, and a harsh punishment rolled into one delusion.
Other women would be happy to be in my place. Random sex with a hot guy, who is also a friend. Not me. I thought I
would be okay with just having sex with Jared until he leaves, but I’m not okay. However, I’m caught in his web and he’ll devour me, and since I’m in love with him, I won’t put up a fight.
The mattress slopes as Jared climbs into bed behind me, and my body already tingles for his touch, which is both good and bad. He nestles against me, putting his arm over my side, and kisses my neck. As much as I want to turn around in his arms, it’ll lead to more sex, not a sweet confession. Although I know I’m in this for a worthy reason—to win Jared’s love—I know I’m also surrounded by even more reasons not to do this. I feel like I’m prostituting myself without the cash exchange—a barter trade for his driving lessons. It’s my turn to pay up. The fact remains that he’ll never love me the way I need him to. It hangs between us like a sword ready to sever our relationship, or whatever the hell it is that we’re wrapped up in together.
I lie still, not responding to his kiss, pretending I’m asleep. It’s the only way I can get space from him, without leaving him. If we’re friends with benefits, I need to redeem all the benefits I can get.
Fuck. Who am I kidding? This entire situation has loss written all over it.
Since I kept repeating in my head before falling asleep that I had to wake up early, I did. It seems to work most of the time, not that I slept much last night. As Jared soundly slept next to me, I stared at the darkened, beige wall the majority of the night.
No longer attached to me, on the physical level at least, I don’t disturb Jared as I quietly get out of bed, and go to the bathroom before I return to my room. With the air conditioning on, my bed is much colder than I had expected it to be, so I pull the blankets up and huddle under them, hoping for a rapid fall into sleep, in which I thankfully do.
Dipping and moving over the bed jars me awake. The room is brighter, and before I am able to roll over to see who’s in bed with me, a hand yanks the collar of my shirt to the side, and proceeds to cover my shoulder with slow kisses. I cautiously ask, “Jared?”
He mumbles over my skin, “Why’d you leave, Kit Kat? You said you’d stay with me.”
“I thought maybe it’d be better for you if I didn’t.” I still wonder if we were heard last night.
Raising his head, his voice is still rugged with sleep. “You thought wrong. That wasn’t very nice. Maybe you should receive a demerit. What do you think?”
I smile against my hand, but my stomach tightens. “Like what?”
He bends his head and I feel his smile against my shoulder. “I’ll think of something.”
Jared’s kisses creep to my ear. “Are you going to take my road driving away from me?” I ask hopefully.
He shakes his head; his lips tickle me when he whispers, “Nope.”
“What then?” I’m afraid to ask because we’re most likely thinking of the same thing, and I should somewhat be hesitant before aspiring to be a prostitute.
His hand slides to my breast and my eyes close as he kneads his fingers into it through my shirt. “We have unfinished business. Don’t we?”
My head falls against his bent arm, and I try not to moan. “We do?”
He lightly bites my earlobe, whispering, “I’m not even close to being done with you.” His teeth then drag along the side of my throat, and his hand moves from my breast, down my stomach, tracing his fingers over the top of my underwear. “Why’d you put these on, Kit Kat? Did you really think once would be enough for me?”
I swallow and squeeze my thighs together, but not to keep him out, because that’s an unlikely development now. “It’s not?”
Jared inhales a breath next to my temple. “Fuck, no. You have me hooked.” His hand delves into my waistband. When his fingers bury into me, I shiver and lightly pant. He groans into my ear and whispers, “I’m fucking obsessed.” Pandora is shaking her head at me.
Doubtful, I ask, “From one time?”
“Our first time.”
“But, you can have any woman.”
He shrugs against me. “Who says? And I don’t want just any. I’ve always wanted you.”
I gasp as his fingers explore. “Why me? My pussy doesn’t glitter or glow in the dark.”
“It’s yours. That’s all I want.”
He finds a more intense rhythm, and arching my back against his chest, I sigh. “Oh, Jared.”
His lips next to my ear, he smilingly whispers, “What, Kit Kat?”
“Your fingers feel so damn good inside me.”
“You’re still slippery, but I think you need more. I’m going to be hard all fucking day, thinking about how wet you are because of me.” His fingers go deeper yet, and I moan.
He works me faster, and needing him to be closer, I push down one side of my underwear. Without taking his fingers out of me, he maneuvers his left hand to help push the other side, and I remove them in a rush. As soon as they’re gone, I turn toward him more, but still on my side. My legs open further, and Jared applies more pressure and speed.
I whimper and he whispers, “Shh. They’ll definitely hear us this time.” His erection prods my naked hip through his shorts. Reaching behind me, I tug down his waistband, and when he’s free, I take him in my hand and curl my fingers around his shaft.
He sharply sucks air in between his teeth. “Kit Kat. Fuck. Your fingers feel so good on me.”
“Shh,” I tease. “We should just be quiet.”
He responds by sliding his fingers in and out, and I gasp loudly, my hips lifting and falling with his tempo.
I counter his action with one of my own, gripping him more firmly as I glide my hand back and forth. He grunts and huffs into my ear, making me wetter. I notice his minty breath. Not fair!
He whispers, “Can you come quietly?”
I pant harder as I ride his fingers. “Jared. Fuck.”
Kissing the nape of my neck, he says, “Shh. You’re so hot. I could finger you all day.” I moan into my pillow and he says, “I daydreamed what it’d be like for you to come on my fingers. I want you to squeeze the fuck out of them, like you did to my cock.” He thrusts his hips against me, while I continue to rub him, finding my tempo, as well.
“You’re so sexy, Jared. I want you.”
He growls, “Tell me again, Kit Kat.”
Sounding too desperate, I say, “I fucking want you. You belong inside me.”
“Fuck right, I do.” He continues to move his fingers, and I feel the build approaching fast.
“You’re going to give me an orgasm,” I throatily whisper.
“I know.” Taking my hand from his dick, I put it over his hand, between my legs, pushing on it as he gets me off. “Kat, you’re the one who’s fucking sexy. You’re going to make me come all over you.”
“Go ahead.”
He shifts onto his knees, yanking his shorts down, and taking his cue, I move up with him as his fingers stay inside me. “Nope.”
“Jared, you’re getting me… Fuck.”
“Come on, Kitty Kat.” On all fours, I thrust against his hand and explode. As I do, he roughly takes me from behind. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” he loudly whispers, and sucks in a coarse breath.
I growl into my pillow as he bangs his hips onto my ass three times and stutteringly pants, and I again moan as I feel him jerking inside me.
“Shit,” he quietly says with a relaxed sigh.
Raising my head from the pillow, he slowly pulls out of me and I return to the curled position I was in as I hear him pulling up his shorts with a snap of his waistband.
Leaning down, he whispers, “Still phenomenal. I gotta go. See you later.”
I roll over to face him, but he’s already out my door, shutting it softly behind him. I stare blankly at it as the tears sting my eyes.
Jared just nailed and bailed me.
This is not boding well for Dash’s theory, or rather Rio’s, that sex may be the key to Jared’s heart. If so, I must have the wrong set.
Hearing voices downstairs, I gingerly sit up, wiping the sudden tears I shouldn’t be c
rying.
Decidedly needing some time on the beach by myself, I get out of bed, and make it pretty so I don’t have to see the crumpled sheets, reminding me of what happened. I change my clothes, putting on my bathing suit, then a green sundress over it, and head to the bathroom.
When I come out, I hear Dash downstairs, asking, “Did you talk to Kat when you came in to get a shower?”
Jared says, “No. She was in her room. Why?”
“Just wondered if she said why she went to bed so early.”
“One in the morning is early for you.”
“Have you talked to her this morning then?”
“She’s still in her room, Calder. Do you really think we should go fishing? It looks like it’s going to storm.”
“It’s not supposed to. Why? You afraid I’ll catch more than you this time?”
“You know you won’t. You’ll be in the ocean as usual.”
Rio says, “We need to be back before Liberty gets here.”
Dash says, “Why? Where will Kat be?”
I go down the stairs and say, “I’ll be at the beach.” I try to avoid looking at Jared, but since he’s standing behind Dash, it’s hard to not to look at him. Jared’s lips quirk into a faint smile, but I don’t return it. I say to Dash, “You can leave the key with me. I’ll let her in. What time is she supposed to be here?”
Sitting at the breakfast table, shoving a bowl away, Rio shifts and stretches his legs out, crossing them at the ankle. “She doesn’t know for sure.”
“Text her my number. She can let me know when she gets here and I’ll come up to let her in, if she doesn’t mind waiting for me.”
Rio smiles. “That’s fine. Thanks.”
Dash comes over with a mischievous grin, and nudges me in the arm. “You just want to go down there to check out guys.”
I smile as Dash and Rio laugh, but notice Jared doesn’t as he bends, putting his arms on the kitchen counter facing the breakfast nook. With his head tilted, his anxious gaze studies me, but then darts away as Dash turns to him.
“Kat could find herself a new driving instructor there. Huh, Jericho?”
Jared’s entire face hardens at a grinning Dash. “She’s already with me.” But not with him.
The Keys to Jericho Page 32