by Dee Palmer
“Regan.” He switches his attention before I can dampen his enthusiasm further with actual reality. “Hey, Ruby-roo, do you want to see your new bedroom?”
“Yeeessss!” She bursts out in a fit of infectious giggles as he leaps them both over the back of the sofa, jogs and jiggles her to the other end of his apartment.
“Joel, wait!” I call out too late. Dropping my bag by the door, I carry Ruby’s case to where all the noise is coming from. The door is sprung wide open, and Ruby is already pulling cuddly toys from one of the shelves and lining them up on her bed, ready to make her selection of who makes the cut to sleep with her tonight.
“Joel, please.” I wave him over, and my hushed tone makes him frown.
He walks to me and continues to close the distance as I step us out of earshot. When I hit the corridor wall, I think he’s going to stop. He doesn’t, not until his large and incredibly firm body is millimetres from mine, not touching, yet still generating enough heat in me to scorch the wall I’m pressed against.
“I like when you beg, but maybe this isn’t the time.” His throaty rumble seems to come from deep in his chest and rakes across my skin like urgent fingernails, I almost forgot the reason we’re here: Ruby.
“You’re funny.” I quell the untimely rising of my libido. “I never thought I’d hear you say that.” I force a light laugh, even as my throat dries, and my fingers itch to touch him.
“I know. It felt weird, but right too.” He smiles and casts a glance over his shoulder at the animated conversation Ruby is having with her new friends. When he turns back, I’m hit with the full force of his incendiary gaze. “Later though, Regan, you are mine.” Oh, shit, maybe this wasn’t such a great idea.
“In your dreams.” My mouth dries as my attempt at a jokey dismissal fails to deliver.
“In my reality, we’re inevitable, Regan.”
“Okay, stop it. That’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.” I shake myself, killing the direction of this conversation. I firmly press my hand on his chest to create some much-needed distance.
“I know that look; stop doubting us, Regan. This is a great idea.” His hand captures mine, and he leads me back into the living space. He sits and faces me as I do the same.
“It’s not that, not entirely that, at least.”
“What is it, then? What’s wrong?” He shuffles closer, his voice tinged with fear, and I know his mind is racing to all the wrong conclusions.
“Ruby is fine. I mean fine for Ruby. It’s not about her illness.”
“Okay, thanks for that, but you’re going to need to tell me what made you change your mind?”
“Your sister.”
“Trinity?”
“You have to promise me something.” I swallow thickly, and it hasn’t helped that his eyes are now boring right through me.
“Anything.” He takes both of my hands in his, and I get a flash wave of comfort from the sincerity in his voice that drenches and coats every part of me. I believe his anything, still in this instance that’s not necessary.
“No, not anything, just this one thing. Ruby is never to stay at your mother’s, ever.”
“Regan, what’s going on?”
“Promise me.”
“I promise, of course, I promise. Are you going to tell me why?”
“I’m not. I can’t.” I wince at the instant recognition and blind fury that darkens his features.
“Fuck! I’ll kill him.” He jolts to his feet, his hands fly to his head as he pulls the tension in large fistfuls of his hair. His body shakes with impotent rage, and he paces like a wild animal. I leap to my feet to try and calm the beast garnering to explode
“Joel, don’t, please.” He finches and instantly checks himself when I reach for his arm. I thread my fingers through his and manage to coax him back to the sofa. His eyes flick with concern over to where oblivious joyful sounds continue to filter into our background. “If Trinity wanted you to know, don’t you think she would’ve told you by now?” He closes his eyes and is silent for long seconds before he lifts his head and speaks. His jaw is bouncing with tension, and I can see it’s taking every ounce of effort to cage his anger.
“And she only told you because of Ruby. That’s why you’re here now?” His brow furrows with confusion, which seems to have eclipsed his anger, for now at least.
“Yes.”
“That’s the only reason you’re here now?” I can hear the hurt edge in his accusatory tone.
“Joel, one thing at a time, yeah?” I exhale heavily, guilt and conflicting emotions messing with my crumbling resolve.
“Time isn’t exactly our friend is it, Reggie?” His voice catches, and he is quick to pull me into his arms, sweeping his large palms over my cheeks and drying the few tears that escaped with the painful truth of what he just said. “As selfish as this is, you and Ruby are my only focus. Honestly, I can’t even give Trinity headspace right now. I will, and I’ll find a way to make that bastard pay without breaking my promise, but at this moment in time, I need to know why you won’t let us happen. You know damn well we belong together.”
“How do I know that exactly?
“I can see it in your eyes, Regan. You know it here, and you feel it here.” He points first in the centre of my forehead and then slowly drags his finger down the centre of me until it hits his target. I swear my heart stops the same time his finger does. “You just need me to remind you?”
“Momma, come and see my room.” Ruby crashes the moment, and I gladly let her drag me away. This was a bad idea. Ruby jumps around, waving her arms and dashing from one new thing to the next. “Look, look at the walls, Momma. It’s a fairyland and the sky. Look, real stars,” she gushes, excitement splitting her face in two with laughter and smiles.
“Oh, wow, it’s…it’s amazing.” I lean against the doorframe and back against Joel when he presses his body flush to mine, his arms wrap my waist, and I let him hold me.
“You like it?” Hesitation in his voice makes me smile.
“What’s not to like, Joel? It’s a ‘show home’ child’s bedroom, and that library there will keep her busy until she goes to college.”
“I hope so.”
“So what do you want to do with the rest of the day, Ruby?” He steps around me, into the room, and drops to his haunches next to Ruby.
“Can we go to the pier and the park and then can we watch Tangled?” She looks from Joel to me expectantly. “Can we, Momma?”
“We can do either the park or the pier, not both.”
“Pier, pier!”
“Pier it is. Let me show your momma her room.” Joel is back on his feet, and, with a wave of his hand, leads the way the short distance to the other bedroom, his bedroom.
“Um…do you have a put-up spare bed or—”
“You can have my bed. I’ll take the couch.”
“Oh no, I can’t, that’s not fair, we’re grown-ups, I guess we could share.”
“You guess? What are you scared of, Reggie? Worried you won’t be able to keep your hands to yourself?”
“Something like that.” I sniff and cross my arms, my first and futile attempt at a barrier against Joel’s not inconsiderable charms and talents.
“I won’t do anything you don’t want. I never have, and I never will.”
“And somehow I don’t feel any safer.”
“Oh, I never said you’d be safe. I just said I’ll wait until I’m asked.” He turns along my body and holds my hips to prevent my escape.
“You think I’m going to ask you?” My response is breathy, and I can feel him harden against me. Shit.
“No, Reggie, I think you’re going to beg.” The sensual threat makes more than my mouth water. This might not be the time, but damn, it feels good to feel normal for once, even if normal is off the charts horny.
“Come on, Momma! Joel!” Ruby yells, and I snicker at Joel’s audible groan as he adjusts himself.
“Mmmm, this is going to be harder tha
n I thought.” Grinning, I pull the collar of my sweater, and heat escapes in a puff of air. And only by stepping away from his hold does the temperature between us become bearable.
“Preaching to the blue balls, over here.”
“Welcome to parenthood.” I playfully pat his cheek, my eyes dipping to take one last longing look at the package he’s still struggling with. “Still time to change your mind.”
“Never. Painful erection aside, I couldn’t be happier.”
“Come on, before I change my mind.” I walk ahead and then cry out when he lifts me high, and spins my body until I am over his shoulder.
“Never gonna’ let that happen. Mine.” He slaps his large palm on my ass and strides into the living room where Ruby is waiting.
“She really likes the long stories, doesn’t she?” Joel rubs the back of his neck and crawls onto the bottom of the bed, pulling his t-shirt clean off his body. I swallow and try to keep my voice unaffected, even if my eyes are on stalks. I opted for full-length yoga pants and a long sleeved shirt for bedtime attire.
“She’s trying her luck. She knows she gets a chapter from me; you she’s got wrapped around her little finger, and she knows it.” I tuck the comforter up to my neck even if my core temperature is reaching the boiling point.
“I don’t know how you ever say no to her.”
“Lot’s of practice.”
“You know she asked if I would buy her a rabbit?” He kicks his jeans to the floor, and I exhale the breath I was holding when he keeps his boxer shorts on.
“You said no, right?”
“I did, but I really didn’t like doing it.”
“You’re going to have get used to it. I’m not raising a spoilt brat just so you don’t have to be the bad guy.”
“I like being the bad guy.” He rolls onto all fours and stalks up my body.
“Joel.” The warning tone evades me, and I’m left with what sounds, at best, like a plea for mercy.
“Regan.”
“Please.”
“Well, that’s a start.” A grin so wicked it would shame the devil spreads like molten lust across his face.
“Please, Joel.”
“Better.” He eases my fingers free of the comforter, and there’s just enough room for him to pull both hands above my head and hold them firmly in one of his.
“Mine.” His lips brush my jaw, and he exhales softly. His warm breath washes my face, and I close my eyes and just breathe him in. My lips meet his, soft and tender, and I want to taste every inch of him, starting right here. My tongue traces and tangles with his, and he lets out a gravelly moan when I suck his tongue into my mouth. I hold his gaze for a moment, his eyes search mine as I take him in, and he does the same. I feel him everywhere, and, as uncertain as I was, I’ve never been more sure. He was right; we are inevitable.
He releases his hold on my hands and flashes the most sinful smile just before he starts to lavish kiss after kiss all over my neck and collarbone. He flips me over and kisses all along my shoulders, up my neck at the back, and he sucks hard just below my ear.
“Mine,” he breathes, and despite the heat and steam, I shiver. He works his way down my back, and I can feel him smile against my skin when my hips tilt, and I wantonly push my arse up toward him as he peels my yoga pants down my legs.
“Patience, angel.” He nips playfully at the round flesh in his hands.
“Not one of my virtues,” I moan. His hands flat between my thighs, he pulls them apart, wide. He presses his face right against my core and drags his tongue as far as he can, reaching my entrance and dipping just inside. Heaven. He fists the muscles of my arse and massages my flesh as he feasts, working his tongue around my slickness. He slides one hand through and up, cupping at my centre before sliding his thumb back and over my pulsing nub. I jolt at his touch, then push back against his mouth. My thighs start to quiver, and desperate little pants rip from my mouth. He slides two fingers inside and presses just where I need him.
I detonate without warning, all over his tongue. I sink almost completely back onto him, his hand on my cheek, his face wedged against my arse cheeks, and his fingers deep inside. I’m trembling as he laps my sensitive softness until my climax subsides. I flop forward out of his hold rolling onto my side with a satisfied sigh, relishing the weight of him as he immediately spoons his body to mine.
“I’ve missed you so much.” My bottom lip wobbles, and even if he can’t see it, I’m sure he can hear the vulnerability. He twists me in his arms and rushes to kiss the hesitation and raw fear from me with tender, reverent, and loving lips. He only relinquishes the kiss when my lips start to curl in a tentative smile.
“Good. Now ride me like you own me because, Reggie, you do own me, heart and fucking soul.” The words tumble from his lips, urgent and demanding.
“Yes, Doctor.”
My whole body shudders. He rolls onto his back, pulling me with him. I shimmy up and widen my legs to hover above his thick thighs and steel rod erection. A tortured hiss escapes him when I drop slowly, covering his entire length with my aching core. I bend forward to touch my forehead to his. My innermost muscles quake and ripple, and I can feel him swell inside me to the point of pain. He feels utterly amazing. His eyes search mine, and I all I can see is raw, undiluted love.
His fingertips inch up my body, relieving me of my t-shirt and the final piece of clothing between us. I start to move, and he glides his hands to rest on my hips, but the pressure is light, and I know he’s letting me lead, even if the pulse jumping in his neck makes me think it’s taking a lot more control on his part than he anticipated. I smile, and my lips seek his. I’m utterly desperate to taste him, my tongue dives into his mouth, swirling in a tangled, passionate duel. I fist his hair, and my grip tightens as my body begins to take over in an urgent and unstoppable race to release. I bounce, pound, and grind, feeling every inch of his rock-hard cock spear into me. I’ve barely got my rhythm when I can feel my greedy muscles start to ripple and squeeze and climb.
“Wait for me, baby.” He groans through his clenched jaw.
I grin, wicked and wanton. Not even a genie could grant that wish. I shake my head, because speech isn’t one of the functions my body is capable of right now. Throwing my head back, I cry out when Joel’s mouth homes in on my soft breasts, and he drags his tongue over one nub, then clamps his mouth around the stiff peak. I squeal when his teeth graze the tip, and it’s enough to send me over the edge. He sits up and wraps his arms around me, hooking through and holding tight onto my shoulders, anchoring me to him as he joins the race. He thrusts hard, getting deeper than I dreamed possible, and with a slight tilt of my own hips, I explode. I gasp his name like it belongs to me, like he belongs to me, heart, body, and soul. He grunts and buries his head in my breasts. I can feel his cock pulse inside me as his climax mixes with my own.
His hands remain on my shoulders, securing me to him even if his cock is still very much a part of me. He lies back, drawing me down with him to the bed, holding me tight, breathless, sated, and now limp in his arms.
“I love you, and I always have. I’m so sorry I never told you.” His soft words drift over me and erase the pain of the past and any doubt of our future.
“I love you, always have and always will.”
His body envelopes me, our skin slick and fused together with not a millimetre of distance between us. It’s perfect. We remain entwined, letting our synchronised ragged breathing calm, and I drift into my first peaceful sleep in what feels like a lifetime. I think Joel joins me.
“Where are you going?” Joel lifts his head from the pillow. His mussed up sexy bed hair flops over half-open lids. He looks like I feel… spent, utterly exhausted, and blissfully happy. I’m going to ache in muscles I didn’t know I had tomorrow. I dip down to plant a quick kiss on his playful pout. His hand grasps the back of my neck and secures a much deeper kiss. I’m more than willing to indulge. There’s not an inch of my body that hasn’t felt his soft, full lips
, and I melt into the contact like the starving wanton that I am.
“I just want to check on her.”
“Do you normally do that? Check on her in the middle of the night, I mean?” He leans up on his elbow, sleepy, but clearly interested.
“No, not normally, trust me, if she wants something, she’ll come and find me but she’s in a new place, and, you know.” I don’t bother to finish the obviousness of what I was about to say since Joel is already nodding with understanding. I stifle a yawn and stand. He swings his long legs over the edge of the bed. “You don’t have to come with me.”
“Humour me. I’ve never done the doting father bit before.” He slips on his pants and t-shirt, muffling his voice.
“Forget doting, voluntarily dragging your bollocks out of bed at….” I squint at the alarm clock on his side, at the blurry red numbers. “Three in the morning when you don’t have to. That’s borderline insane.”
“I think you mean ‘perfect bollocks’.” He grins and wiggles his brow, walking around the end of the bed with way too much vigour for this ungodly hour. I snicker.
“Trinity?” I ask, recalling that very phase I used to reference him when his sister visited the other night.
“Trinity,” He confirms when he reaches the door. “You know, middle of the night sex is one of my favourite kinds of sex.”
“Fiend.” I say with a sly grin, my body tingling with the sensual threat. Joel hovers at the door of Ruby’s room, and I quietly pad over to the lump of bed covers. I don’t wake her when I pull the covers back, and panic chills my blood. My hand flies to her pulse point on her neck as I snap my head and yell.
“Call 911.” I pull the covers clean from her little body and access her airways and circulation. Her pulse is barely there, and her breathing is erratic and light. This all happens in a split second, and yet seems to play out in slow motion. I look over to the doorway expecting it to be clear, since Joel should be calling the paramedics. He’s ghostly vacant, ridged and unmoved. “Joel!” I bark his name, the volume and urgency still belying the critical situation. “She’s stopped breathing, you need to call, NOW!” I don’t know if he moves, because I do. I hunch over Ruby and press my mouth to hers. I can feel the life drain from me and all I have racing in my head is yes…please God…. Let it pass to her, let my life reignite hers, because I don’t want it, not without her.