by Natalie Ann
Amelia laughed. “You think anyone that stands up for themselves is mean, Gemma. You wouldn’t get walked all over if you had a backbone.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t walk all over me or force me to stand up for myself. Did that ever occur to you?”
“Enough, girls,” their mother said. “This is getting out of hand. Blake, I appreciate you standing up for Gemma. She needs that in her life. But like Amelia said, that is how the girls always were. It’s nothing to be concerned about. Gemma is just a little sensitive and Amelia is a little...harsh. They balance each other.”
Not in any world he knew of. There was no use arguing, he could see. “Gemma, can we talk outside for a minute before I leave?”
“Yeah,” she said and walked out of the living room and into the front yard. He followed behind, glad to be out of her family’s glare.
“Why don’t you come home with me tonight?” he said. “Let them stay here at the house and since there are only two bedrooms there would be no arguing or hurt feelings.”
“My feelings are hurt enough for everyone,” she said.
“Exactly the reason you should come home with me.”
“Are you trying to save me?” she asked him. He pulled her closer and pressed her head to his chest.
“Would it matter? Everyone needs saving at some point in their life.” And it seemed to him she never got it from anyone else.
“I need to stay. I should learn to stand up to Amelia. She’s right. Maybe I need to hash it all out with my sister once and for all. Though you can tell whose side my mother is on. It always goes like this. My mother starts to defend me, then Amelia jumps down her back and my mother ends up siding with Amelia. My mother has never really liked conflict either.”
“I can stay if you need some moral support,” he offered. He didn’t think anything was going to change between the sisters, but if she felt she needed to do this, he’d support her.
“No. It’d just aggravate them more. I should be fine. I mean there aren’t any Twinkies in the house for me to grab so that’s a plus.”
“You’re beautiful,” he said, kissing her forehead.
“Is that all I am to you? Just some pretty face? You heard Amelia. I was fat before. I didn’t look anything like I do now.”
“And you think I wouldn’t be attracted to that person?” he asked.
“You wouldn’t be.”
“You don’t know that,” he argued.
“I do. You wouldn’t have offered to come back and change my locks. You wouldn’t have asked me to dinner. I’m not that person anymore.”
“Deep down you are that person. So you look different, but that doesn’t change what is in here,” he said, his hand sliding over her heart.
“You wouldn’t have even learned what was inside of me if it wasn’t how I looked. That’s what I’m trying to say. And I don’t blame you. I get it. Trust me, I get it more than you ever want to know.”
He desperately wanted to ask her what she meant by that. “I want to argue with what you’re saying, but the truth is, you’re probably right. That’s wrong of me.”
“It’s not wrong. People are attracted to what they are. You can’t change them. I guess I’m just happy that you find me attractive and it’s another incentive for me to not put the weight back on like Amelia so kindly explained back there.”
“You won’t,” he said. “You are way too disciplined for that. But if you did, then you did. It won’t change the way I feel about you.”
“It’s easy to say that when it’s not happening. There is no reason we should stand out here and dispute it either. I don’t want to be that person anymore. But you have to know that though I don’t look like it on the outside, I still feel it so much on the inside.”
“Because your bitch of a sister makes you feel that way,” he said, an internal heat filling his body.
“She does. She has my whole life. She is that way and I can’t change her any more than she can change the way I am. But standing here with you and listening to you has given me some courage to go in there and tell her what I think. To tell her to mind her own business and go live her privileged life and I’ll live my simple one.”
“If being privileged is living with someone like her, then I’ll take simple every day of the week.”
“So will I,” she said. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Go home and get some sleep. You’ve got to work tomorrow, I don’t.”
“Sure, rub it in. Do you have plans tomorrow? I can’t imagine you want to spend more time with them. How long are they staying anyway?”
“They’re going into town to shop a bit and get massages. I’m staying here and enjoying the quiet. They said they were leaving early Saturday morning, but might go Friday afternoon. I’m hoping for Friday afternoon. I’ve lived with Amelia long enough that I’m sure I can get through a few more days.”
“If you change your mind and want to come to my place, just let me know. Even if you want to tomorrow.”
“Thanks for the offer,” she said, leaning up to kiss him. “But I’m a big girl now. Well, I’m an adult, not a big girl. I’m going to try to handle this on my own. You don’t always need to protect me.”
“I like protecting you,” he admitted.
“I’m not sure how I feel about that. On one hand it feels good, but on the other it might hold me back when I’m trying so hard to move forward.”
He didn’t like hearing that, but he wouldn’t stifle her either. “The offer stands for tonight or tomorrow. Any night.”
“Thanks. I’m good though.”
She gave him one more cuddle, then walked away. As much as he wanted to follow her inside and stand next to her, he turned and left.
Idea of Love
Friday afternoon, Gemma sent him a text that she wanted to celebrate. That her sister and mother had left early and she’d like to cook for him tonight. She wanted a quiet night at home if he was game.
Hell yeah, he was game. Not to mention, he was dying to find out how it went with her family.
He’d fully expected Gemma to tell him all about it, but she didn’t. She didn’t confide in him like he’d hoped and he wondered if she chickened out. If she lost the bit of courage she said she was finding.
See, he knew he should have gone back in with her. Stood next to her. Helped her say what was on her mind.
So what if he was trying to protect her? What was so wrong with that? Wasn’t that what people did when they loved someone?
And that was the point. The thing he realized in the past few days.
He was in love with Gemma. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been in love with anyone before. Not like this. Not where he’d stand in front of her for anything and everything.
He’d thought he was in love before, but realized that was nothing to what he felt now. Before it was more the idea of love. Of finding someone and having the normal life he’d always wanted and dreamed of.
Nothing was normal in his life growing up and now he knew nothing was with Gemma either.
He finished up his work, went home, showered, and grabbed clothes. He fully expected to spend the night at her place. He wanted to hold her all night. He wanted to feel her body next to his.
He wanted to tell her how much he loved her. But he wouldn’t. It was too soon for those words, he knew.
“I’m so glad to see you,” she said, opening the door before he could knock. It still made his heart go pitter patter that she did that. That she was waiting for him.
He lifted her up in a hug and swung her around. Those times he was home on leave and hoping there was a woman he could do this to were flashing in his brain. It was even better now. It meant more.
“Same here. Are you glad because the wicked witch is gone, or did you really miss me?”
“Would it be mean to say both?”
“It’d be truthful and that’s just as good.”
“Then it’s about seventy percent missing you and thirty percent they’re gone.”
“At least I rank higher,” he said. He put his overnight bag on the couch, but she picked it up and brought it to her room, then came back out.
“You’ll always rank higher. Trust me.”
“So don’t keep me in suspense. Did you give your sister hell?”
***
Gemma was thrilled that Blake brought clothes to stay the night. She wanted him to, but still didn’t feel right asking just yet. Though they’d been together for weeks, it still felt so new to her. New enough that she wasn’t as bold as she was trying to be. Hoped she could be.
Tonight though she was hoping to be bolder.
Yet here he was almost putting her in a bad mood wanting to talk about her family. Best to get it over with.
“I wouldn’t say I gave her hell, but I told her that she hurt me. That she did my whole life.”
“What did she say to that?”
“Not much. Same old thing. What she said when you were here. That she was trying to toughen me up. I told her it was a pretty crappy way to do it and when she made me feel bad I ate.”
“Bet she loved hearing that,” he said.
“She got pissed. Told me to grow up. That it was more excuses like when I was younger. I couldn’t control myself so I had to blame it on others.”
It hurt to repeat those words to Blake as much as it embarrassed her. She didn’t want him to know how fat and ugly she was as a kid. She’d hoped to hide that fact but knew it’d never happen now.
“She doesn’t see that she’s done anything wrong. Did your mother say anything at all?”
“No. Amelia can do no wrong in my mother’s eyes. And my brother, Andy, can do no wrong in my father’s eyes.”
“That left you in the middle and out in the cold, didn’t it?”
“Pretty much. But I had my Aunt Julie and that made up for it.”
“You said your aunt traveled a lot. So she couldn’t have been around much.”
He didn’t need to point that out to her. “No. And like I said before, that just ticked my parents off too. It’s like they weren’t giving me attention, but they didn’t want anyone else to either.”
“I want to say I feel so bad for you, but I don’t think you want any pity.”
“No. It’s in the past. I don’t live there anymore. I don’t have to deal with it. I said what I wanted to. There is no use bringing it up again. No one in my family feels they’ve done anything wrong and no amount of talking will get them to believe it. It’s best to move past it.”
“That’s a good attitude to have,” he said. “Can I help you with dinner tonight?”
“You can when we get to it. But right now I’ve got something else in mind.”
“What’s that?” he asked, but the smirk on his face told her he knew what she was thinking.
“I found some courage to say things I’ve always wanted to say. It didn’t give me the results I was hoping for, but I’m glad I did it. Now I want to do something I’ve never done. I’m hoping to get the results I’m looking for though.”
“What results are those?” he asked, his voice having gone husky. Deep. Sexy. Arousing.
“I want to make a big strong sexy guy’s knees buckle.”
“You do that all the time.”
“But I want to do it another way,” she said, her hands going to the button on his shorts. He was already growing, she could see. Just what she was hoping for.
“I’ve got no problem helping you achieve whatever goal you’ve got.”
“Good. Then you can stand here while I do it.”
She slid the zipper down, then lowered his shorts with his underwear. He was rock hard and standing tall. Standing proud.
She went to her knees in front of him, put both her hands around him and started to stroke up and down. Velvety smooth. A heat that would warm the coldest of houses in the middle of the winter.
The moisture that was beading at the tip was just calling out to her. Shouting out as if to say, “Taste me, you know you want to.”
And boy did she ever.
The tip of her tongue came out of her mouth, flickered over the drop of dew, then she covered him halfway and started to suck.
There was a groan sounding in the room. She wasn’t sure if it was his or hers and figured it didn’t matter.
He’d done this to her enough and she knew how much she loved it. How wonderful it felt and she’d been waiting to give it back.
She’d been wanting to see if she could make his knees wobble and his belly feel like mush as hers had so many times.
“Tell me if I’m doing something wrong,” she said.
“There is nothing wrong with what you’re doing,” he said, so she covered him more with her mouth while pushing her hands down, then moving them up as her lips pulled back.
She had this. Just like sucking on a lollipop.
She hadn’t thought it was possible for him to feel harder, but he did right now. He felt like steel in her mouth. Hot molten steel just waiting to explode.
Would she be able to go all the way? Could she?
Only one way to find out.
Her hands were moving up and down, nice and slick from her mouth. She’d found a rhythm and continued. Sucking, licking, stroking. She wondered why she thought she’d need courage for this.
There was a power behind it. A thrill even.
He was getting close, she was pretty sure. She didn’t need his hands to go in her hair and tug her back either. “You don’t have to keep going,” he said.
“I think I want to.”
“I’d love if you did, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to.”
“I don’t feel that way. Besides, if I want your knees to buckle, I think that is part of it.”
“They are darn close to it now,” he said.
She was done talking though. She was ready to close in on the finale.
Going back to what she’d been doing—it seemed to be working, so why not—she kept it up until she heard his breathing in the faint recesses of her brain.
It was heavier than she’d heard before, but still sounding like when he was getting ready to come.
She picked up the pace some more wanting to get him there. Wanting to taste it herself. Feel it like he felt so much when he brought her to this point.
“Gemma,” she heard, but she wasn’t listening anymore and she wasn’t stopping to talk. Nope, she couldn’t when her mouth was full.
His hands were gripping her hair tighter, moving her head up and down to a slower pace. She’d let him control it. He knew what was best. That pace allowed her to put some suction behind it and that seemed to be all that it took.
He shouted out and she swallowed as fast as she could, then did it again.
When it was all said and done, she was pretty damn proud of herself because Blake was actually on his knees next to her hugging her tight.
An Embarrassment
The next morning, Blake heard his phone ring. He reached over to Gemma’s bedside table and slapped his hand around trying to find it.
“Hello,” he said.
“Blake. It’s Mike. Mom’s in the hospital.”
He sat up fast. “What?”
“You heard me. She’s in the hospital.”
“What happened?” He swung his legs over the bed to stand up.
“Her last boyfriend beat the shit out of her last night.”
“What the hell!”
“Just get your ass here if you can,” Mike said, then hung up.
Gemma thought she had a dysfunctional family. That was nothing compared to what he was going to be dealing with. His brother couldn’t even bother to give him any Goddamn details. Typical.
“What’s going on?” she asked, sitting up and throwing the covers back. “You look upset.”
“My mother is in the hospital. I need to head to Syracuse and find out what’s going on.”
“Who was that on the phone? They didn’t give you details?”
He sta
rted grabbing his clothes and headed for the bathroom. Might as well take a shower here before he ran home to pack. “It was my brother, Mike. He does what he always does. Gives the barest of information and then hangs up on me.”
“You’re kidding me? He called to say she was in the hospital and didn’t give you any details at all?”
He opened the bedroom door and turned to look at her. “One detail. Her latest boyfriend beat the shit out of her. Those were his words. I don’t know anything else and if I try to call him back he won’t answer. I’m sorry. I need to run home and pack. I have no idea how long I’ll be gone. I need to call work too.”
“I’m coming with you,” she said.
“What?”
“You heard me. I’m not working right now. I’d just sit here and worry. I know there isn’t anything I can do, but I can be there for you. You were here for me with my family; I can be there for yours.”
He shouldn’t have been shocked that she’d said that, but a part of him was. “This is nothing like your family at all. And I don’t know what I’ll find when I get there. Trust me when I say my family is an embarrassment.”
She laughed, not a funny sound either. “And mine isn’t?”
“That’s true. Really, I appreciate the offer, but you don’t need to go.” Even if he’d love nothing better.
“I don’t need to do anything, but I want to. Stop talking and take your shower. While you’re home packing I’ll do the same here.”
He could tell by the look on her face there was going to be no arguing with her and honestly he didn’t want to. It’d be nice to have some kind of support.
“Let’s take a shower together. Then when we get in the truck, if you don’t mind finding a hotel while I drive, that’d be helpful.”
“You won’t stay with any family?”
“Hell no. Even if they offered I wouldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do it if I was alone and I sure the hell wouldn’t do it having you with me.”
***