by Lani Lenore
There were beautifully wrapped gifts of all sizes and colors, tied carefully with matching bows. As Olivia looked over them, she couldn’t quite forget that there were some missing. Euan hadn’t yet arrived. She wished greatly to see his face, just as the other children were awaiting the wonderful toys he would bring them. Surely he would not let them down; he never had before.
Olivia remembered the last story that her uncle had told her before he’d left, for he always told her stories, and she always remembered every one. The last one he spoke to her was about a girl who opened a box that she was not supposed to, and inside were all the dreadful things in the world, released simply because she’d been too curious to control her actions. Olivia remembered this, and since he had left, she’d not wondered once what he’d bring her, remembering that curiosity was bad, but silently hoping he wouldn’t bring the gift to her in a box.
Olivia could hear sounds of disturbance from the children’s table as they finished their meal, now as they headed towards the tree with excited voices. She also heard the adults beginning to stir. It wouldn’t be much longer until they would all be opening presents. The more she thought, the more she longed to see–
Outside the door to her left, she began to hear a gentle scraping on the stoop. The girl’s face lit up immediately and she pulled herself up with her petticoats. She ignored Anne, who had lingered with her silently, heading to the door in a rush as the thumping of a cane outside became louder and closer. She pulled open the door happily before any servant could reach it, and there he stood.
Olivia stepped back to let him inside, and soon all the children were aware of his arrival. The shadow of a tall, stooped man came into the house, his cane thumping along with him. He wore a long brown coat, his white hair hanging to his shoulders, his hat covered with snow. One blind eye was concealed by a patch and he carried a large bag on his back.
He looked nothing like a toymaker. In fact, he seemed like the sort of man that children might have feared, but there was not one here whose eyes did not glimmer for his arrival. He had a warm smile and soothing voice, with which he’d won over many. On this Christmas Eve, he appeared before the children like a rather thin and ghastly Father Christmas, but they welcomed him just the same.
Once he saw Olivia and the other children, his face lit with joy, happy to see them after such a long time. At once they all began speaking, asking questions of him and wanting hugs. The adults had gathered in the hall at the ruckus. A servant pulled a chair out into the floor for Euan, and another took the bag from his shoulder.
Euan sat in the chair, speaking with those who welcomed him, but all this was silent to Olivia’s ears. The smile on her face could not be tarnished. He was the most important person in her life, and finally he was back after leaving her alone for quite some time. It seemed like forever, but now all of that was in the past. She shoved it away to be forgotten.
“I’m so glad you’re home, uncle,” she said as she hugged his neck tightly.
“As I am glad to be back with you,” Euan said sincerely. “Now,” he began, addressing them all. “I do believe I have something for all of you.”
The children smiled happily, sitting on the floor in front of him to wait until they were called. They all wore huge smiles, and Olivia joined them, having no problem with awaiting her turn. She knew that the wait would be worthwhile.
4
Anne stood near the fireplace, feeling the warmth of the flames against her back. She watched Olivia sit down with the other children, though clearly much older than they were. Euan gave out his gifts to them one by one, and Anne was all the while thinking how pathetic it was. Anne had never been so spoiled.
That is all her problem is. She’s petted, Anne thought, but she would never suggest that aloud.
“Do you think the way you treat her is right?” The low voice near Anne’s ear startled her. Had the tone been any less smooth, she might have shrieked with surprise.
Anne turned her head to see Todd, who had stepped up without her notice. He stood facing the children, his arms crossed before him, his dark hair silky and perfect. Anne didn’t see this young man often, but they had spoken before. He had never been very formal with her, and Anne was not afraid of her dialogue now–but to her dismay, all he seemed interested in talking about was Olivia.
“And how is it that I treat her?” she asked lowly, hoping to hide their conversation from the others who were standing about. They should not have been speaking in view of others, but Todd did not seem to care.
“You all treat her like a child,” Todd said simply, a bit snide.
“That’s how she wants to be treated,” Anne insisted, tilting her head toward Olivia where she sat on the floor with the younger ones. “Look at her. She’s one of them.”
“If you’d treat her like an adult, perhaps she’d act like one,” he said heatedly. “She’s not ignorant. You allow her to be viewed as this.”
Anne was getting annoyed with his tone, but it wouldn’t be proper for her to raise her voice.
“There is no hope for her,” said the nurse, her words level, but proving without a doubt that she’d given up on the girl. “She is lost to whatever strange demon resides in her mind. That is all. Nothing can be done.”
“I refuse to believe it,” said Todd, turning his face to her finally.
At his simple piercing stare, Anne’s heart began to speed. Clearly though, he didn’t desire her for conversation, or anything else for that matter. He would only scold her and she was unable to escape, yet she would remain upright and without emotion in the face of it.
“You refuse to believe that she is mad?” Anne asked him pointedly.
“No,” Todd revised. “I refuse to believe that she is incapable of getting well. She’s strange, that’s true…” He sent his gaze back to Olivia, still sitting on the floor–waiting. “I would prove that there was something different inside her,” Todd said thoughtfully, “but you must let her go first.”
What? A shiver ran up Anne’s back, across her neck and reaching toward her ears. Todd had asked her to let Olivia go? He had asked her to leave this place? Impossible. To give Olivia up would be to let go of everything she had here. No! There would be no giving up. She had worked hard to establish her place in this house, and she intended to hold onto it.
“I cannot leave her,” Anne declared with valiant devotion–a lie which they both recognized. “She’s not well. I care too much about her to leave.”
“You care nothing about her,” he countered. “No one does.”
“And you would pretend to,” the nurse accused quietly. “Wanting to take her away for study at your University, no doubt.”
Todd fell silent a moment, refusing to look in her eyes.
“I suppose this is not the time to speak of these things,” he decided finally, though no one else in the room had seemed to notice their exchange. “Perhaps later.”
He leaned back against the mantle then, setting his sight intently on the gift–giving ahead, just as it was time for Euan to present Olivia with her gift.
Anne tried to forget what had just transpired, or to at least appear as though it had not affected her, but at the moment, she was relieved that Todd could not see her face. She would not have admitted it, but his words troubled her. Inside, she felt threatened, and she did not like that notion at all.
5
The children were happy to have received their presents of dolls and soldiers, none looking quite alike, but Euan was most happy to present Olivia with her gift. She was his sweetest girl and held a special place in his heart, even if the rest did not recognize the beauty of her state.
She came forward, standing in front of him with innocence that could not be ripped away by the progression of age. This warmed Euan’s heart. He smiled affectionately.
“Every year for fifteen years, I’ve made your gift,” he began, “but this year, in my travels, I came across something that I wanted for you. I don’t know why I chos
e it,” he said, trailing off into his thoughts a moment, “but as soon as I saw him, I knew he was for you.”
Reaching into the bag, her uncle pulled out a gift wrapped in paper. He must have known of her fear of a box, and Olivia was happy to open it. She peeled back the paper carefully until finally, she saw the thing that was to be hers, and her eyes lit up with surprise and wonder.
“Do you like him?” Euan asked hopefully, though he knew she would not refuse.
In her hand rested the gift. He was tall, cut from rich, brown wood and painted with precise detail. His face was carefully carved with surprisingly smooth cheeks, a perfect nose, and a stern, attractive mouth. His wooden head was draped in white hair that reached down his chest, almost seeming real. He had no visible eyes, but empty sockets of black that created the illusion of eyes. He was straight and tall, his arms at his sides, but strangely, under his arms were ridges of metal, and mirrored crests were against the sides of his waist.
Euan watched Olivia examine him–as she lifted one arm out to the side, letting it fall back to hit against the metal ridges of his torso with a cold, iron clank. To his pleasure, she was amazed and enthralled by it.
“I’ve never seen quite an interesting nutcracker,” said Euan thoughtfully, almost as if to himself. “His arms are for the cracking, not his teeth. And his face is carved so beautifully–a prince among nutcrackers. He must definitely be rare. He was not in the best shape, but I cleaned him up and gave him a new coat of paint. Now he’s good as new.”
Olivia examined the toy’s small mouth, seeming amazed to find that there were simply a pair of carefully carved lips; no large jaunty teeth like the common sort. Euan could tell she loved him immediately.
“He’s wonderful,” she said in awe as she gazed down at the nutcracker prince. She hugged him, and when she drew back, Euan saw the same little girl that had always smiled back at him, never changing. As long as she was pleased, all was right with the world.
6
Once Olivia had been presented with her gift from Euan, she had been given other unwrapped boxes, but the girl had lost interest. She cared nothing about other gifts she might have, fascinated as she was by the nutcracker. She would have the others tomorrow, and Olivia could not be bothered to care what her family thought of her. She was as oblivious as any spoiled child, and when she asked Anne to take her to her room, her request was granted.
Chapter Three: Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
1
Dressed in her pale nightgown, Olivia held the nutcracker lovingly, completely taken with the decorative doll. He had strong arms; she liked that about him. He was a perfect, though unconventional–looking soldier. He would keep her safe.
She ran her fingers lightly across his painted wooden chest, smiling down at him. None of the other dolls would have this one for a prince. He was too beautiful to share. In her mind, she saw herself and this nutcracker dancing across a huge ballroom floor, gazing at each other.
But he will go to war first, Olivia thought with satisfaction. Yes, he would fight for his lady without hesitation.
She was so infatuated in that moment that she didn’t hear the door of her room slowly creak open. Or perhaps she simply chose to ignore it.
A figure stepped inside, closing the door and locking away the light from the hall lamp. Feet stepped quietly across the inner rug and passed the bed, stopping before a shelf of dolls on the far wall. Olivia was aware of him now, though she intended to ignore him as a shadow on the edge of her vision–but her attention was drawn to him when his young hands lifted up one of her porcelain dolls with exaggerated care.
“You didn’t seem very sociable at dinner,” said Todd, examining the doll a moment before setting it back on the shelf. “Is your uncle the only one you’re pleased to see?”
Olivia averted her eyes, refusing him for the nutcracker in her grasp. She wished he would go away, but instead he moved towards the bed, sitting beside her carefully, only to watch her a short moment before he spoke.
“I missed you,” he said. “Did you not miss me at all?”
Olivia ignored him, trotting the nutcracker across the bed in front of her. If I pretend I don’t see him, he will go away. When he lingered, she finally stopped, slowly drifting her blue eyes toward Todd as he sat silently, staring at her. She didn’t like that gaze. It made her think of a hungry wolf.
“What if I had,” she asked, “but then decided not to miss you? I was perfectly fine without you being here.”
“You didn’t think about me at all?” he asked, touching her shoulder.
She shrank back at his touch, disgusted by it.
“I made it just fine without your company,” she insisted, managing to shrug him off.
Todd stood then, stepping to glance at the shelf of dolls in front of him once again. His action seemed nonchalant, but she had seen the anger in his eyes.
“These kept you company?” he asked, staring at all the blank expressions on their lovely faces. “They aren’t making you better, you know. Though I wonder how sick you are to begin with.”
“You shouldn’t be here,” she said quietly in a pout. “It’s improper for a man to be in a lady’s room.”
“Ah, but you’re not a lady, are you? You’re a child.”
He turned to face her, and though she knew it, she ignored his words, only to play with her new gift. Todd sighed, crossing his arms before him as he watched her.
“Olivia,” he said firmly, commanding her attention. Finally she looked at him, though only slightly from beneath her lashes.
“They are not treating you well,” he insisted. “You know what I want.”
Todd sat beside her again–once again on the doll quilt–taking her shoulders gently while forcing her to look into his eyes. “I asked you to come with me. I can take care of you better than they can.”
Olivia was silent a moment. Yes, he’d asked her before to go with him, promised they’d live in Paris. He’d said he’d take care of her and not let her be overlooked–as she was here.
It had sounded good to her for a while, his promises set to music by his silky voice. He was persuasive, yet she could not bear the thought of parting with her uncle. She may not see him but once a year! That was longer than she could take. More than that, she didn’t think she could part with the dolls, the puppets, and the toys. Her friends. Todd would make her get rid of them; that was certain. Olivia had then wondered how she really felt about Todd. She’d pondered her own feelings for a while, and come to the only conclusion. No, she could not go.
“I can’t go with you,” she said to him finally. “If I go, they will have no one to be friends with. No one will look after them. It would be selfish of me.”
He quivered in his skin as she said this. Olivia saw it.
“Why do you reject me?” he asked. “You know how I desire you.”
He sounded angry, and Olivia wasn’t sure why. When she only stared at him, he brought her up from the bed forcibly, jerking her like a child. She came to silent attention, gaping with wide eyes, her gown drooping over her smooth shoulder. She still held the nutcracker in one hand, unwilling to release herself from it as if the toy were a sacred relic that would protect her. She readied herself, staring at him, awaiting what would come.
2
Todd had always considered himself to have a firm grasp on his emotions. He could put on any sort of face necessary, yet he found that his best intentions always got away from him when Olivia was involved. Whether in her presence or even to simply discuss her, he was not the same rational man he prided himself in being. Now was no different.
Why did she do this? She pretended to ignore, refusing to hear anything she did not want to, and no one forced her otherwise. He shook his head, tired of her games.
All she spoke of were these dolls–these toys that surrounded her! Did she not know how he felt? Surely she must, despite her naiveté. He was her cousin by blood, that was true, but he had loved her always. He’d been dream
ing–for years!–of the day that he would take her away with him and show her that there was more to life than her dolls.
As he looked down at her, her hands caressing the nutcracker, his patience began to slip. How could she deny him so? After all they’d shared together? He’d looked after her, visiting her when he’d not been busy with schooling, though he hadn’t been around for some time now. Surely she hadn’t forgotten him so soon.
His eyes fell across her skin. It had been so long since he’d seen the color of her flesh. Her complexion was a milky color–the lightest, purest, and most unblemished he could fathom. It was skin that he’d dreamed about for the longest time.
He’d had her once before–only once before leaving for his third year at University. How innocent she was back then… She must have had no idea of what she was doing, though now surely she understood what they’d done. Perhaps that was why she was so cold to him now. He’d barely managed to convince her before, only told her that they were playing a game. She was his doll, and he could position her as he wished. He had, and the whole of the time she’d kept the same expression, as though she’d felt nothing–not pleasure, not pain, nothing. He’d had the lust for her skin then, and now he felt it once again.
He held her shoulders tightly and pulled her against him, feeling the warmth of the blood pumping beneath her skin. He was quickly overwhelmed, lowering his head to kiss her, pinching the flesh of her lips with his own.
You will not hide from me, he thought spitefully. You will not escape this.
Todd bore down on her against the mattress. She tried to push away, but his grip held tightly. He tried to keep her restricted, but she managed to escape his hungry kiss, pulling her head to the side.
“I won’t,” she said, breathing in the air that was free of his hot breath.