"Perhaps our families will be joined by a double wedding, then. Do you think Anjali would find me attractive?"
"She hasn't seen you in years!" Khanjar burst out laughing. "And she's a dutiful daughter who does her father's bidding... unlike Ashrita!"
"Khanda," Talwar corrected.
"Khanda," Khanjar repeated, amused, before throwing water in Talwar's face, making him sputter.
"I'll drown you!" Talwar roared as they playfully fought in the shallow water close to the shore.
It felt good to have someone to talk to again. Talwar was an introvert and always had very few friends. Having lost his monastery companion, he was glad things between him and Khanjar had returned like during childhood.
***
Then he was given a new mission, and again he was paired with his cousin. And Khanda. What was left of Lord Anand's family was being troublesome, and they should get rid of them. Men, women and even children who could one day raise their voice and want to avenge Lord Anand's death.
Khopesh took the lead as usual. Talwar was so unhappy with the mission, he gloomily followed them through the darkened streets of Agharek.
"I go to the men, Khanda gets the women and you go to the nursery," Khopesh said, giving orders as if it were his god-given right. "Unless you want to kill the women," he added with a smirk.
"Nursery is fine," Talwar said through gritted teeth, not looking at any of them.
"Good, it is settled, then," Khopesh said, putting his hand around Khanda's waist.
"Hands off," she snapped.
Talwar barely glanced their way. Khopesh was trying to pull Khanda closer, but she wouldn't have any of it.
"We're going in stealthily, you don't need to pretend!" she insisted, steering away from Khopesh and moving to the other side of Talwar so he'd be standing between them.
Khopesh glared at both, but kept going. Talwar stared straight ahead, trying not to think about what was to come. Khanda squeezed his fingers briefly and let go. When he looked at her, she didn't return the stare. She walked stiffly, her lips thinned in repressed anger, her beautiful face frowning in the night.
That wasn't someone he'd want to anger. She could stand up to Khopesh. She knew what she wanted. He must find out what she really wanted, but now was not the right time.
They reached Lord Anand's palace and split as soon as they forced themselves through the back entrance. The palace was quiet and dark, but they had studied a plan of it. It was very similar to the Guild's palace so each of them knew where to go.
The upper floor, the noble apartments. Couples, two of Lord Anand's daughters still unmarried, the nursery. Lord Anand's three wives had committed ritual suicide on their husband's funeral pyre, but their offspring seemed determined to avenge their father's murder.
Talwar moved silently through the tiled corridor. The nursery had half a dozen children from a baby to a seven-year-old along with a wet-nurse who was curled up in a corner. He started with her, using the silken noose to strangle her.
She awoke and tried to scream as she choked. He kept pulling the silken noose until she stopped shaking. He realized the noose had cut into her throat and she was bleeding as if he'd cut her with his dagger.
Disgusted with himself, he let go of her body and wrapped the noose around his wrist again. He was out of breath and had to calm his racing heart. Yes, he knew how to be a noose operator, but he hated it even more now that he'd actually done it. Stealing a life. An innocent life. What was the wet-nurse's fault? To be in charge of the children of the household. And for that she had died.
And he wasn't done. He took his dagger and quickly thrust it into the little bodies, stealing more innocent lives who would never grow up. The bloodbath left him weak in the knees and sick to the stomach.
He cleaned the dagger's blade on the bloodied bedsheets and quickly slid out of the nursery. He was horrified with what he'd just done and briefly considered cutting his wrists to atone for the killing.
His destiny couldn't be to kill in cold blood. He was better than that. He must find a way to get out of the guild. Killing children! Where was this going? What would be next?
He couldn't bear the thought of more missions. Holding a hand on his stomach, he met Khanda and Khopesh at the backdoor. She looked troubled, but he was smirking as usual. Heartless bastard.
"Done?" Khopesh whispered. Both Talwar and Khanda nodded and Khopesh signaled them to move.
They went back to the Guild's palace in total silence. Talwar didn't think he'd ever speak again. He felt dirty and unworthy and wondered why he was doing this. He should be the sword of Zindagi, protecting life, not stealing it from innocents in the dead of the night.
Khanda's light caress before they parted gave him some kind of relief, but he slept fitfully and awoke grumpy the next morning.
***
Khanda wondered if Talwar was avoiding her on purpose. Or if he was just being a dutiful son and obeying his bastard of a cousin, staying away from her. She was almost certain Khopesh had told Talwar she was his.
She was nobody's property. And Talwar was still the shy one. He obeyed orders, but... She wondered if he'd rebel – how he felt, about their families, their job, her.
They had gone on a mission together. She could tell he was as upset as she was. The first mission had turned her into a courtesan-assassin, seducing and killing a man. The second mission meant she had to kill women.
Harmless women. Sleeping women. She hated herself for what she'd had to do. She wondered if Talwar felt the same. If he was fed up with their families too. If they could get away from Agharek and their powerful parents and live peacefully somewhere else.
But there was no way to speak to him in private. Khopesh seemed to be always by her side. Talwar's sisters were still at the fortress and Sameera wasn't trustworthy enough to use as messenger to her cousin. She might not like her brother, but that didn't mean she was ready to take her cousin's side.
Khanda must find a way to speak to Talwar. They must leave and forge another life for themselves. A life where they helped people and set up a family of good citizens, even though they had to give up their parents' wealth. But they were young enough to learn another job.
Time seemed to stand still in the heat of the white walls of Agharek. Even her winged friends weren't enough to calm her. She just wanted to leave everything and everyone behind. But she had to at least try to take Talwar along.
***
Talking about the mission with Khanjar didn't help. His childhood friend didn't mind killing strangers. He didn't enjoy it, but he didn't mind either. Talwar soon understood that this time Khanjar wasn't on his side, but he knew that Khanda would understand. Except finding her alone wasn't easy, since both were busy with different social duties.
The occasion came during a ball held in the great hall. All the families of the Assassins' Guild currently in town had been invited to the Head's home to celebrate the demise of Lord Anand's family – a very secret party the town knew nothing about.
Khanjar commented that probably Khopesh hoped to announce his betrothal to Khanda, but the maiden hadn't said anything yet. Nobody knew whom she would choose, but if she declined Khopesh's proposal, she'd have to leave the palace, which made Talwar's heart shrink.
If he thought he could never see her again... Although if she rejected Khopesh, he could step in. He'd have to tell his father, which didn't make him happy. He was still too dependent on the family, both emotionally and financially. He should find the strength to leave and make his own path.
The ballroom was full of young people in their best clothes – silks, damasks and elegant shapes – but his dancing skills were close to nothing. He was too tall to be balanced and often said he danced like a bear. Not a pretty sight and certainly not a good way to win a woman.
Khopesh was a very good dancer and he showed off his skills once again, mostly with Khanda, until she said she needed rest. The musicians started playing a slower tune, but Khanda didn't take
Khopesh's offered hand. She turned to Talwar, who was standing against a column, observing the dancers, and offered her hand to him.
"Why don't you dance with me, Talwar?"
"I... uh... I'm not a very good dancer," he apologized, taken by surprise.
"I will make you twirl some more!" Khopesh offered.
"No, thank you," she snapped. "I wish to dance with your cousin now."
Her hand was still extended towards Talwar, waiting. Her ice-blue eyes looked straight at him. Her luscious lips curved into a smile.
Dazzled by her face and her jewelry, he took that hand and led her to the dance floor. Slow dances were easier for him than the fast ones. He took her in his arms and tried to keep the rhythm, swaying gently left and right as she followed lightly in his steps.
"It seems this is the only way to talk to you without anyone eavesdropping," she said. "The other way seems too forward even for me."
"What would the other way be?" he asked, puzzled.
"Me knocking on your door, knowing you're alone?" she suggested with an impish smile.
He choked on the reply. Yes, that would be too much even for her. She'd be called a whore for meeting a young man alone.
"That's why I haven't knocked on your door yet," he said, after gulping his shock at the thought. "I wanted to talk about the mission we did together."
"Not now, there isn't much time. I have a more pressing matter to tell you. Do you wonder why I'm here?" she replied, amused.
"Because Khopesh wants to marry you?"
"That's the official reason, Talwar. The real reason is to see what you've become. And you're actually even better than I expected you to be. Forgive my forwardness, but you don't seem to be taking hints well, so I'll spell it out for you." She took a deep breath and stared at him. "I've been in love with you since I discovered what love is. I missed you dearly for those seven years you were away. I was afraid they'd change you. But now that I see how you came out of the initiation rite, and especially after that mission that has obviously upset you as much as it upset me, I'm very happy to see my love wasn't wasted. Now I only need you to be a little more forward with my father and yours, and request me in marriage, and we'll live happily ever after."
Talwar stopped dancing and gaped at her. It must have taken her some courage to say all those things aloud in a crowded room during a ball that was supposed to celebrate her betrothal to his cousin! A betrothal that would never happen, now that he knew how she felt.
"Keep moving, please." She gently nudged him, and he resumed dancing, closing his mouth.
He quickly glanced around, but everybody looked oblivious. The music was loud enough to cover words, but she was right. There wasn't much time, Khopesh was staring at them – eyes narrowed and lips thinned – ready to come over as soon as the song ended.
"Khanda, I... I am overwhelmed by your speech. I had noticed the mission was tough on you as much as it was on me, but I didn't know how to broach the subject... and I certainly wasn't hoping you'd return the feeling that burst inside me when we met again. I admit I wasn't really interested in women when I left, but now... you make me want to hold you and protect you for the rest of my life!"
She smiled and looked away. "Just like I expected, my proud and shy Talwar... I shall tell Khopesh that I do not wish to marry him and will wait for your father's request."
"I shall write to him to come immediately and request you on my behalf," he promised gravely. "You can go back to your family's palace and await the summons."
"I look forward to it," she whispered in his ear, leaning against him and making his heart beat faster. She smelled of jasmine and perfumed soap. He barely refrained from squeezing her in front of everyone.
They finished the song staring into each other's eyes, then Khopesh claimed her again. Talwar let her go and left the great hall. He wanted to write that letter immediately, while his heart was still beating fast from Khanda's loving words.
5.
Talwar went back to the monastery after sending off the letter to his father. He had to close that chapter of his life in a better way than being dragged out of the temple against his will. Besides, he had considered going back anyway, until Khanda had told him her feelings.
First he stopped in the marble temple for a short prayer in front of the painted statue of the goddess. Now that he looked more closely, the statue's features reminded him of Khanda, although the goddess had obsidian eyes and tawny skin and black hair. The colors might be different, but the shape was so much Khanda... He wondered who the long-dead artist had used as a model centuries ago – he must have loved his muse, and had infused her life in a stone statue.
Then Talwar went through the backdoor and into the inner courtyard of the monastery. The students were all out, exercising in pairs under the sun, which made him smile at the memory of his own training.
He recognized one of the teachers, a bulky monk with black curly hair tied at the nape of his neck who had taught him everything about swords.
"Bhai Maza, do you think the abbot will see me?" he asked, stopping next to the monk.
"Of course, Ajay." The man grinned. "Go ahead, you know where to find him!"
The abbot let him into his small office, where they had often met during the seven years he'd studied there. Talwar had ended up loving the abbot more than his father, and felt he hadn't said a proper good-bye to his mentor. He might never wear the brown vestment of the monks, but he owed them many thanks for his education.
"You look well," the abbot said, letting him sit on the stool in front of his desk. "Have you come back for this?"
He pulled Talwar's journal out of a drawer. Talwar looked at the little leather-bound booklet that contained his former, dreamy self, and gulped.
"I'd rather you kept it. I don't think my family would understand what I wrote in there," he said.
The abbot nodded and put it back inside the drawer. "So how was the homecoming?"
"At first, very busy," Talwar answered, head bowed. "That's why it took me so long to come back here."
"It's been just a month." The abbot smiled. "Did if feel like a lifetime to you?"
"Sort of... Let's say that eventually I found a new reason to abandon the monks' way," Talwar replied. "I wish to consider myself a lay person. I have met the woman I want to spend my life with. She's a childhood friend who was bold enough to let me know that she wishes to marry me, even though her parents want her to marry my cousin."
"Ah, love!" The abbot smiled. "Yes, I understand why the life of a monk won't suit you now that your heart beats for someone! So, no Bhai Name for you. I still think you deserve the pole-arm of our order, if you're willing to accept it. I'm not clear what your father's trade is, but it might be useful to protect the life of your wife and future family."
Talwar smiled ruefully, averting his eyes. "My secret name is Talwar," he said.
The abbot gasped. He knew what weapons' names meant. It didn't matter that it was the sword chosen by his order. When used as a personal name, it meant only one thing.
Talwar could be punished for revealing that name to an outsider, but he knew the abbot wouldn't betray him and his new identity.
"I do not wish to follow my family's tradition," he continued, determined. "I'm sure Khanda will agree with me that we can have a better life away from Agharek. I don't think our families would allow us to give up our skills."
"Were you involved in Lord Anand's death?" the abbot asked with a frown.
"Yes," Talwar answered, eyes low. "It was horrible." Not so much wounding the nobleman, more what had followed – those innocents killed in the dead of the night... He shivered at the memory and looked at the abbot again with a lump in his throat. "Do you still wish to give me the pole-arm of Zindagi?"
"Do you still wish to protect life?"
"I do! I don't want to be an assassin! I hate myself for what I had to do, but I had no choice!"
Did he really have no choice? Shouldn't he start behaving like a g
rown man and stand up for himself? But the lofty palace was full of scorpions, they'd never let him be who he wanted to be. Not only his father, but his uncle and Khopesh and everybody else... maybe even Khanjar would tell him he was a fool to turn his back to his family!
"I am aware of that." The abbot nodded. "I should have known that you're so good with weapons for a reason. Your friend Rahul also chose the lay life, I think he's getting married soon."
The abbot rose and went to a stack of pole-arms. He took one and handed it to Talwar.
"Here's your weapon. You know how to activate the seal. Follow in the footsteps of Zindagi and you'll be fine. Best wishes to you and your bride."
Talwar rose to take the pole-arm then bowed deeply to touch the abbot's feet.
"I am honored to have been part of your school," he said. "Thank you for teaching me the value of life."
The abbot blessed him and he left the monastery feeling at peace with himself and the world.
***
"The nasty one comes!" the parrot warned as the other birds flew off to hide in the branches of the inner garden's tree. Khanda frowned and looked at the garden's door. Indeed Khopesh was sauntering towards her with his usual smirk.
She caressed her gupti, hidden in the folds of her skirts, and kept her head high. She didn't rise from the bench to welcome him, which made him scoff as he stopped in front of her.
"I thought you'd be happy to see me," he said.
"I'm not. I do not wish to marry you, Khopesh. I shall take the blame for breaking our betrothal."
His smile vanished as he frowned.
"You're not breaking anything," he whispered threateningly. "Next month you will come to the altar with me and we will be married."
She rose, clenching her teeth.
"I will not," she warned, holding her dagger tight, ready to use it.
He laughed. "I will not be rejected by you," he warned.
"You are rejected, Khopesh. I will not marry you."
He raised his arm to slap her and she pointed her blade at his throat. He let his arm hang down and smirked.
Talwar and Khanda--Assassins in Love Page 4