by Deborah Camp
With Matthew, it was so different. Maybe it was because they’d started off as friends. Or maybe it was because she’d chosen the right man this time.
A couple of days later, Matthew was headed for the bedroom to rid himself of his tie, coat, and vest among other articles of clothing when the street door buzzer sounded. Not now! Whoever it was, he’d get rid of them quick. He wanted a shower, two fingers of Johnnie Walker, and then he’d like to get naked with his neighbor. His brain felt like oatmeal. It had been one of those days when he’d put out one minor catastrophe after another while trying to come up with some clever advertising slogans for a top client. Retracing his steps with a weary sigh, he peered at the screen that displayed Carin staring owlishly at the camera. She hadn’t called about visiting Toodles and that cranked up his irritation. He pressed the speaker button.
“Yes?”
She made a face and propped one hand on her hip. “Can I come in?”
“I just got home.” After a long, tiring day. Get lost.
She stared at the camera.
Please get lost. Oh, hell. With a vicious jab, he buzzed her in. Yanking at his tie and shedding his suit coat, he draped them over the back of a chair before swinging open the door for Carin. The outside breeze had gently rearranged some strands of her blond hair and she patted them back into place as she stepped past him, trailing Chanel in her wake. She wore a navy pantsuit with a shamrock green turtleneck sweater. Her heels were the same shade of green. For some reason, his gaze traveled to her right hand and he was startled to see her wedding and engagement ring on her third finger. Wrong hand, but what the fuck? She hadn’t been wearing it on either hand since their breakup. Was she going to ask for his forgiveness again? He hoped not because he wasn’t in a forgiving mood.
Toodles waltzed in from the bedroom wing, spotted Carin, and walked right past her. Matt raised his brows and looked from the departing feline to Carin.
“Toodles!” Carin puffed out a breath of irritation. “Mommy’s home. How rude!”
“You’re supposed to call before coming by. Like I said, I just got home from work and I have plans.”
“I was in the neighborhood and it’s been so long since I’ve visited.” She shrugged as if that’s all she needed to say, then she sat on the couch.
“Like I said—.”
“What’s this?” she interrupted, picking up the framed photo of his family last Christmas. “I haven’t seen this before.”
“Yeah, well, it was last year.” He saw her looking around and knew she had noticed the other framed photos placed on the tables and mantle. “We found some cool frames and I put some of the family photos in them. Makes the place more personal feeling and not like it’s ready to be shown by a realtor.”
“We?”
After all that, she’d grabbed onto that one word. He took the photo from her and replaced it on the table. “Zaney and I.”
“Oh, I see.” She touched the houndstooth, crushed velvet pillow near her. “Is this one of her personal touches, too?”
“Yes.” He shoved his hands in his pants pockets and shifted from one Oxford to the other. “Why are you wearing your wedding rings? I thought you got rid of them.”
She held out her hand to admire them. “I was going to, but I couldn’t. So many wonderful memories are wrapped up in them.” Her gaze lifted to his and her smile was wistful. “Did you find photos of us?” She glanced at the picture again. “Like our ski trip to Aspen? Oh, and the weekend in New England?”
“Carin, I don’t mean to be rude, but it would be better if you visit Toodles another day. Or take her with you for an overnighter. Like I said, I have things to do.”
Her smile wilted into a frown. “I’ve told you. I can’t have pets where I am.”
“Yes, but you can take Toodles for the night. You do it all the time when it suits you.”
“What are you doing that’s so important this evening? A meeting with a client?”
“No.” None of your business.
She continued to stare at the photos near her, but he could tell her mind wasn’t on them. She had something else simmering. “Zaney. So, you two are still good buddies?”
He shrugged. Still none of your business.
A feline smile tilted her pink lips. “I heard that you two are actually dating. But I find that difficult to believe.”
“Oh? Why is that?” He pressed his lips together, pissed at himself for taking her bait.
“You’re usually good at knowing when someone is sincere and when someone isn’t.” Her brown eyes shifted sideways to regard him. “You two are a couple? Seriously?”
He dragged a hand through his hair. “I’m not having this conversation with you, Carin. I’m tired and I don’t want company. Get it?” He’d spoken louder and harsher than he’d meant to.
Her eyes rounded. “Don’t yell at me, Matthew. I’m not your wife anymore.”
“No, you aren’t. Thank God.” He swallowed the rest of his burst of anger. “And I wasn’t yelling.”
“Whatever.” She stood and tucked her small, blue purse under her arm. “No need to get huffy. I don’t care who you screw. I only wanted to confirm the Zaney thing because if you’re sleeping with her, then I lost the bet.” She flicked her hair over her shoulder. “Darn it. I thought for sure I’d win that one.”
He shook his head, unable to follow her. “What are you talking about? What bet?”
She eased past him, heading for the door. “A silly bet we made. I said that you’d never trust another woman enough to have more than a casual, unemotional fling. She bet me that she could make you trust her and win you over.” Her laughter grated like sandpaper against his heart. “Zaney is cleverer than I gave her credit for.”
“You don’t even know Zaney.”
“Is that what she told you?” Her eyes glinted with secrets. “And you know her so well, right? Amazing.”
He stalked toward her, her words stinging him, flaying him. Yanking open the door, he made a sweeping gesture for her to exit. “Call next time.”
Her glare was frostbitten. “Fuck you.”
“No, thanks.” He shut the door before she could hurl something else at him. Striding to the bedroom, he stripped off his clothes and flung himself into the shower.
What was all that bullshit Carin was shoveling? A bet? Zaney made a bet with her about having an affair with him? He stood under the stinging spray, thoughts whirling in his tired brain like a windmill gone berserk. It had always seemed odd – almost too serendipitous – that Zaney had met his ex-wife. Out of the blue like that. In a bar. What were the chances of such a thing? But, then if it hadn’t happened like that, why would she lie? Maybe she had known Carin before, heard Carin’s side of the divorce war. Had she moved here because she knew Carin and was already familiar with this building?
“Whoa, whoa.” He shook his head, making his brain stop weaving stories and scenarios. Finishing up in the shower, he dried off and slipped into a pair of sweatpants and an old Yankees t-shirt. Going straight to the liquor cabinet, he poured himself a generous measure of bourbon. Tossing it back, he swallowed half of it and then took the other half with him to his favorite recliner. He closed his eyes and felt the liquor warm his insides.
What if Zaney had lied to him?
He scrunched up his face, hating the thought of that. Women had lied to him plenty. In fact, he expected them to lie now, so it was no biggie when it happened. But, Zaney? Open, honest, heart-on-her-sleeve Zaney? Could she be closer to Carin than she let on? Close enough to bet that she could gain the trust that Carin had smashed to smithereens?
He was so lost in his dark musings that he didn’t compute the tapping on his front door until it swung open a little and Zaney stuck her head around it.
“Hey!” She smiled and stepped inside. “There you are. I texted you, but I see you don’t have your phone on you. I wanted to know if you’d like to make a pizza tonight. I have all the fixings at my place.”
&nb
sp; Her smile. It lit up the room. He shook his head, his gaze raking over the tight fit of her jeans and her roomy, off-one-shoulder, long-sleeved t-shirt. She looked so young and innocent in that getup.
“Earth to Mr. Birdsong.” She waved a hand at him. “Does the idea of whipping up a pizza with me make you catatonic?”
He tipped up the glass and finished the drink. “Did you talk to Carin just now?”
“Carin? No. Was she here visiting Toodles?” She spotted the cat sitting on the couch and reached out to pet her.
He set the empty glass down. The liquor buzzed in his brain. Something chilling stole through him, coating him like a shield. “Did she visit you, too?”
Zaney stopped petting the cat and narrowed her eyes at him. “Why would she visit me?”
“Did you know her before?”
“Before what?”
“Before you moved here.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Something Carin told me.”
Her head inched back. “What did she tell you?”
He winced, stung by what that question could mean. “Is that your way of seeing if she spilled the beans to me?” The smile stretching his lips was almost painful. “Yeah. She told me about the bet you two had going about me.”
“A bet?” She pushed her bangs off her forehead in a frustrated gesture. “What are we talking about here? I’m confused.”
“The bet. She told me that you bet her that you could get me to trust you enough to have a relationship with me.”
“Say what?” Her jaw unhinged and her eyes spit green fire. “You have got to be kidding me with this.” She waited for him to say something else, and when he didn’t, she planted her feet farther apart and folded her arms in a defensive gesture. “You’re entertaining this line of crap, are you? Carin, the woman who cheated and lied to you, dishes this out and you lap it up?”
“So, that’s a ‘no’? No bet?”
Sucking in a lungful of air, she released it in a noisy gust and glanced up at the ceiling. “I have had maybe two conversations with Carin. That night at the bar was the first time I ever laid eyes on her, as I’ve already told you. As for a bet?” She shook her head, then froze the motion. “Oh, wait. I do remember something about that. But no one was serious. I said that I bet you’d find true love again one day and Carin said she doubted it.” She flung up her hands. “Something stupid like that. Is that what you’re all jacked up about?”
He shut his eyes against the disapproval and disappointment on her face. “Hell, I don’t know. It’s always seemed weird how you met her. Never seemed plausible to me.”
Her harsh, sobbing laugh made his eyes open again. She was heading for the door.
“Wait, Zaney. Let’s talk. I just want the truth.”
She turned back to him. Her upper lip curled as a chuckle punched its way out of her. “To quote from A Few Good Men, you can’t handle the truth. Or you just don’t want to. Maybe this is your easy way out, huh? Carin gave you this gift. Yeah, that’s it.” She laughed again, but tears glistened in her eyes. “It’s about time for you to end us and Carin sharpened the old ax for you. Look, man up and just tell me that you’re ready to get back on the one-nighter train.”
Pushing up from the chair, he held out one hand to her. “That’s not what I’m saying, and don’t cry. Carin said some things and it started me thinking, that’s all.”
“Did it?” She planted her hand on her cocked hip. “I’m crying because I’m mad, Matthew, and deeply disappointed in you. Carin still has you by the gonads.”
He stiffened and anger burned a hole from his gut up to his brain. “Watch it, Zaney.”
Her expression morphed into a bitter, chiding, mask. “Did I hit a nerve? Why are you still allowing her to barge into your business? Tell her to get her own damn cat and quit using Toodles as an excuse to keep herself attached to you. She parades in and out of your life, keeping tabs and admiring her handiwork, and you let her.”
“I said, watch it,” he growled, anger pumping in his veins.
She gestured, her hand moving from his head to his feet. “She did this. She shattered your trust in women, iced up your heart, and bragged about it to me and Lonnie! Well, maybe she didn’t brag, but she made sure she told us that she’d ruined you for other women.”
It felt like his jaw might break in two. He realized that he was shaking his head, refusing to acknowledge the validity of her insight into the scars Carin had left on him.
“I barely know Carin, but I know what she did to you and that’s why I don’t understand why you’d listen to anything she says.”
When she spun about and grabbed the door handle, he broke free of the icy grip of his anger. “Wait. You can’t say those things and then walk out.”
She glared at him over her shoulder. “Watch me.” She blinked away the moisture in her eyes and the look she gave made him freeze again. “You either want to be with me or you don’t You either trust or you don’t – and you don’t.”
“Zaney, for Christ’s sake.” He didn’t say anything else because she’d shut the door. In. His. Face.
Chapter 17
You Don’t Gotta Friend
Seth rapped three times on Matthew’s office door and then just barged right in – as usual. He flopped down into one of the chairs and glared at Matt.
“What?” Matt asked, not bothering to turn his chair and face him. Instead, he continued to gaze out the window at the tall buildings and patches of sky.
“Lonnie says you broke it off with Zaney yesterday?”
He nodded. Yep. That’s what he’d thought this was about. “Not exactly.”
“Well, did you or didn’t you?”
“We argued. It was mutual.”
“And you didn’t think to tell your best buddy about it?”
Matt shrugged. “I’m still mulling it over. As far as I’m concerned, we haven’t split up yet. We still have things to discuss.”
“Yet? What’s to discuss? What did you do to her?”
He rolled his eyes, then swung around to face Seth. “Not that it’s any of your business, but it wasn’t entirely my fault. She overreacted. She’ll realize that and we’ll patch things up.”
“That’s not what Lonnie said.”
“Lonnie wasn’t there.”
“She says that you accused Zaney of some kind of silly bet? Something that Carin cooked up and you gobbled it down like the schmuck you are.”
Matt placed his hands flat on his desk as the serenity he’d been carefully piecing together fell to ruin. “I asked her about it because . . . well, it sounded plausible at the time. She blew up.” He shook his head. “Who knew she had such a snappish temper?”
“She has red hair.”
“So?” He glared at Seth. “She didn’t give me a chance to explain. Just stormed out before we could come to an understanding.” He leaned back in his chair as his gut knotted. “If she’s going to freak over something like this, maybe it’s better that we are cordial and that’s it.” He could barely get the words past his lying lips.
Seth chuckled and jerked at his tie, loosening the knot and releasing his collar button. “You don’t believe that for one second. Ever since you met Zaney, you’re more like that old Matt.”
“What’s that mean?”
“The Matt before the divorce. The guy who made friends easily and hadn’t walled off his feelings. Don’t revert to that guy. He’s a borderline asshole.”
Matt arched one brow at his friend’s harsh assessment. “And you’re a perfect specimen?”
“I know a good woman when one comes into my life.” He propped his elbows on his knees and drilled Matt with his steady stare. “Being Zaney’s friend is great, but I gotta believe that you like being her lover even better.”
He shifted uncomfortably in the chair. “Maybe I’m not cut out for monogamy. You ever think of that? Zaney said something about me looking for a reason to end it with her. She might be right. I have
been sort of holding my breath, waiting for it all to crumble to dust.”
Seth shook his head as sadness darkened his hazel eyes. “Why, man? Is it the failure stench? You can’t get over the death of your marriage? Hell, Matt, making a fool of yourself over the wrong woman is a rite of passage! Doesn’t make you special. Doesn’t make you a loser. It just makes you single again.”
Matt swiveled to stare out the window. The conversation was veering into an uncomfortable territory. He and Seth talked business, joked about their sexual prowess, and discussed sports. Dealing with sappy feelings and heartache was rare.
Obviously sensing his edginess, Seth pushed up from the chair and buttoned his suit coat. “Get your head back on straight and fix it with Zaney. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I can ask Lonnie to make some time for you.”
Matt smirked. “Gee, thanks.
“It’s the most I can do. Oh, and next time something like this happens, let me know about it. Having to hear it from Lonnie makes me look like some chump who means next to nothing to you. I mean, I was going to ask you to be my best man, but if you won’t even tell me when you’ve done something asinine, I’m having second thoughts.”
“Right. Will do. I—.” He blinked as his thoughts skidded to a stop. “Best man? You’re getting married?”
Seth’s grin split his face in two. “December tenth.”
Matt rocketed from the chair and rounded the desk to pump Seth’s hand and whack him on the back. “Congratulations! She agreed to marry you, huh? I thought Lonnie might hold out for something better – like a puppy.”
“Yeah, fuck you, too.” Still grinning, Seth stepped closer to bump shoulders with Matt. “I asked her last night. We’re going ring shopping this weekend.”
“She’s the one, huh? You’re positive?”
“Not a doubt.” His smile shifted slightly from exuberant to sentimental. “Yeah, she’s it for me. Making her happy is the best feeling in the whole, crazy world.”
“I can still be your best man, right? Even though I’m a screwup?”
“Yeah, I guess.” He sighed, dramatically, then pumped Matt’s hand once more before letting go and strolling to the door. “See to it, Matt, and for God’s sake, keep me posted!”