“Oh.” She stared at the phone as if not really seeing it.
Alessandro reached over, touching her hair. “It wasn’t until I’d left Egypt that I had seen hair like yours. It’s beautiful, like the sun.”
Her brow furrowed. “You don’t like the sun.”
“The sun doesn’t like me. You will be my sun.”
“You need to know, that I don’t really understand any of this between us. I’m not saying that to hurt you. I’m just trying to be honest.”
He nodded. This connection between them was entirely foreign to her. “In time, you will understand.”
“How can you be so sure? You hardly know me.”
“I know you far better than you think I do.”
“How?” There was no attitude. This wasn’t her being defensive of her inner-self. This was a legitimate desire to understand.
He took a breath, deciding how best to explain something so completely out of her scope that there were no words to describe it. “I’m living on you,” he said finally. It wasn’t the best explanation, but it was all he had for her.
“Only in part.”
“Bagged blood is just food, like one who is on a special diet and can only eat plain foods and nothing else.”
She sat there for a time. “So, what does that mean, exactly?”
“It means you have a slave, habibti.”
She made a face over that. “Three-thousand year old vampire, my slave?”
He smiled, showing his fangs purposefully. “I am at your service, my lady.”
She smoothed her palm over her leg. “Put those things away. What does habibti mean anyhow?” she asked as if to change the subject.
“My love, basically.”
She lifted her brows in question.
“There is no such thing as a literal translation.”
“You called me that the first time you saw me.”
He smiled ruefully. “You are a beautiful woman. I could hardly help myself there.”
“Hmm. Is that my name now?”
“Most days, yes.”
“Then what else will you call me?”
He thought about it. “Ya rouhi. My soul.”
Her mouth opened, then it closed and her brow furrowed. She was overwhelmed. He could read her mood now through their bond more than her expression. Alessandro let her think on what he’d said for a time.
“I found a steakhouse,” was all she came up with.
He smiled knowingly. He was getting ahead of her but she would catch up soon enough. She was sharing his essence with him. He didn’t tell her about how that would change her. There was no sense in alarming her. She would notice the changes soon enough. It was best to let it happen on its own time.
“I can order takeout and we can pick it up,” she said.
“I’ll take you to dinner. It’s safe enough.”
She chewed her bottom lip in consideration. It was adorable. He wanted badly to pull her onto his lap and taste those lips.
Not a good idea while he was driving. Maybe he’d do it later.
“I still feel a little lightheaded, like I took too much cold medicine.”
“I didn’t drink enough to harm you, but it is emotionally draining. You’ll need time to recover.”
“Draining? Funny. Pun intended?” She stopped, looking out the windshield. “Most of what we talk about can’t be discussed in public, anyway.”
“I have good hearing.”
“But I don’t.” She shook her head, looking at him pleadingly. “Maybe it sounds crazy to you, but I need some time. I don’t think I can be around people tonight.”
He’d been with enough women to know that bloodletting was akin to sex, and sex when done right, tended to bring out a softer, more vulnerable side. He spoke smoothly to her. “It’s not crazy, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”
“Yeah? Well, how about things I don’t mean to do, and then do anyway?”
He smiled. “There’s no sense in being hard on yourself. This can’t be helped.”
“Easy for you to say.”
“I never meant to change your life, but it seems you were a part of it anyway. There’s no one better suited to keeping you alive than me.”
Her gaze lingered, then she turned back to the phone. “I’ll put in my order. We’ll reach the exit in about fifteen minutes.”
“What else do you need to know?” he asked levelly.
She set aside the phone, touched her neck experimentally. “I could tell you were feeding, in the blood bank.”
He hadn’t been fully aware of how closely she had been linked to him until he’d felt her growing tension about his thirst.
“Yes,” he said. “And you were upset with me yesterday because I was getting hungry.”
“So, this is sort of a symbiotic relationship?”
“I guess you could say that, if you wanted to take the heart out of it.” He lifted his brows.
“But you’d kill me if you didn’t have another food source.”
“It’s called a curse for a reason. I could not live off you and not kill you too.”
“Well, good thing you know what you’re doing.”
He hoped he wasn’t scaring her too much. He sensed confusion mixed with an edge of fear. This was too far outside of everything she knew. “Like I said before, only a child would kill his mate.”
“You had concubines.”
“Yes.”
“So...”
“It was a long time ago. I was more monster than man then. I’ve no wish for that life again.”
“What changed, besides leaving Egypt?”
“I found my humanity.” That was the short story. It had been a long road there, however.
“At the monastery.”
“In part, yes.”
“But monks don’t have mates.”
He thought he could see where she was going with this. “I didn’t have one.” He glanced at her and smiled. “Now I do.”
Kendra looked away. “The church likes, you know, people to get married and all.”
“I tell you I am bound to you. You feel it. You know that we are one, and yet you are worried about vows and holy water?”
“You wear a crucifix, and it didn’t even occur to you to ask me to marry you?”
“Too human, perhaps. Not something I think about.” He glanced at her while maneuvering around traffic. What was between them went beyond mere human existence. He was offering her his soul, and here she was worried he might not be committed enough to marry her?
“You’re worried you will be living in sin?” he asked. “Is that what bothers you?”
“I don’t care what you think about it,” she said defensively.
For a twenty-nine year old widow, she was young.
“What happens if you find another woman like me?” she asked.
“I’m not looking, habibti.”
“Were you looking when you met me?”
“No.” Why did he have the feeling he should start bailing water now?
She lifted blonde brows, waiting for a good answer.
Three thousand years and he was no closer to understanding women. It was pathetic, and yet, he accepted, completely understandable too.
“I am yours,” he told her. “You know that to be true. Whatever you need of me you will have.”
She blew out a breath. “Okay, then. I want to get married. Until that point we keep separate beds. I hope.” She said the last part under her breath.
This woman trusted him enough to keep her alive, even when he took her blood, but not enough to take her to his bed. She took coupling very seriously.
“Very well then,” he told her. “We will marry if it makes you feel better, but it had better be soon, because we won’t make it very long celibate.”
“Gee, thanks for humoring me.”
He eyed her. “You are still angry with me?”
“Are men naturally clueless?”
“Yes
.”
She opened her mouth, then closed it and sighed. “Just promise you’ll wear a wedding ring, okay? Or all bets are off and I’m outta here.”
He doubted that, but didn’t bother calling her bluff. “What significance is there in a ring that cannot be found in blood?”
“How will other women know you’re taken?”
He had to catch himself before he laughed and embarrassed her. If he wanted a woman outside of her all he’d have to do was appear in public, ring or no ring. “Yes, habibti. You can pick it out.”
“Good then. Glad that’s taken care of.” She nodded. “Here’s the exit.”
He could take her to Switzerland, to Father Davide. It seemed fitting that his life at the monastery should officially end this way.
“One condition,” he said.
Blue eyes narrowed in his direction. “What?”
“You let me take you back to the monastery to be married.”
“Switzerland?”
“Yes. Then, when it’s safe, to Paris, Rome, Cairo, Hong Kong. A year, no less.”
“A year for what?”
“The honeymoon.” He focused out the windshield, purposefully letting her absorb that information without any input from him.
“Wow,” she said after a moment. “You guys do things big.”
***
Kendra decided that she was sticking to her guns when it came to separate beds. A girl had to draw the line somewhere, right? Or was she being even more prude than ever? Sometimes it was so hard to know if you were doing the right thing or not, especially when you were different from other people. Her mom had told her once to never let a man push her too far, too fast, that it was up to her. Her body. Her choice.
She was bound by blood to Alessandro, could hardly deny that now. Her feelings for him were growing exponentially. But if he wanted her body, then he would just have to wait for it. Never mind that the next time he took her blood she might not be able to stop herself. That was a whole forty-eight hours away. A whole mere two days. Erg.
He was looking at her with a no-nonsense expression, arms crossed over a tight bare chest, dark hair loose around his shoulders and that beard of his reminding her of some ancient warrior.
“Forget it,” she said. “This is one river that can’t be forded.”
His brow furrowed. “When I say that I will not touch you today, you can believe it.”
“You bet you won’t.” She crawled into her own bed in her flannel pajamas, and pulled up the blankets.
“I have lived long enough that I can be near a woman I want and not have her.”
“Goodnight.”
“We’ll both sleep if we are together.”
“Goodnight, Merwet.”
He said something in Arabic under his breath, tore the covers back from his bed, and flopped onto it, rocking the frame. My, he was moody when he didn’t get his way. And he was fed too. This would be interesting in a few days. She touched her neck, itchy now. Interesting indeed, when she too felt his thirst.
She curled into a ball, recalling last night. His mouth on hers, his hands arching her back to expose her throat more fully to him. The ecstasy when his fangs entered her.
She sensed him standing over her and opened her eyes.
“You sound like you’re hyperventilating,” he said.
“Go away. I’m fine.”
“I can smell you, hear every sound you make. I know your mood. We will sleep better if I can feel your body.”
He reached for her. Before she had a chance to back away, Kendra found herself swept into his arms, then in his bed, draped indecorously over his chest.
“You don’t like to hear the word no, do you?” she said, propping an elbow on him.
He pulled a blanket over them both. “You’re denying yourself comfort for no reason.”
“I’m setting boundaries. All good relationships have boundaries.”
“You keep talking of boundaries. Who came up with that?”
“I don’t know, some psychiatrist.”
“We are as close to being one essence as any two people can be, and she wants boundaries,” he said.
With a snort, she gave in and settled herself a little more comfortably against a chest that was really just too hard for comfort. It was like sleeping on the floor. Kendra closed her eyes. She would give him this, but no more.
“Fine,” she said. “But no sex, buster.”
“Yes, habibti.” His arms curled around her, holding her tightly until she gasped from it. She felt her ribs creaking under the strain. “Not today, anyway,” he finished.
“Brat,” she breathed, becoming unfortunately aware of her own needs as he had her flushed so tightly against him. She hoped he couldn’t smell that, figured he probably could.
Chapter Nine
While Alessandro was in the shower, Kendra took advantage of the ridiculously little private time she had and went to the window, pulling back the shade to watch the sun set. She hadn’t seen the sun in days. Alessandro had come, like a black storm into her life, taking over, practically absorbing her into him, as if she’d soon cease to exist altogether. Was this to be her life now?
The darkness.
Did she really want it that way?
Sure, he could see in the dark but she couldn’t, and everything was dim for her. He’d told her that she was his sun. She gave him light, and blood, but she knew mostly it was her company she gave him. Everything else just kind of came with the territory.
Kendra closed her eyes as the last of the sun’s orange light bathed her face, watched the glow through her eyelids. In a few weeks, her already fair skin would be even whiter than usual. She’d be as pale as death itself.
She sensed Alessandro behind her and made to close the shade quickly so it wouldn’t hurt him, but he caught her hand.
“I’m all right,” he said. “It’s almost gone, not as strong as the sunrise.”
He had his face averted. He was shirtless, his silver crucifix around his neck and his hair towel damp. Ducking his head, he rested his forehead against her shoulder, hiding his eyes from the sun, using her as his shield.
“What happens if you look at it?” she asked.
“Pain. And blindness.”
“For how long?”
“It depends on the exposure. From a few minutes, to hours.”
“But it leaves you vulnerable until you can heal.”
“Yes.”
It was moments like this that made it hard for her to reject his emergent feelings for her. When he told her the truth unadulterated he left himself vulnerable to her. But he did it anyway. He was forging that bond between them like a hunter’s snare closing around her ankle.
The sun sank behind a row of pine trees and she let down the shade. “Coast is clear,” she said.
He didn’t move away. His arms slid around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. He smelled so good, and it definitely wasn’t his shampoo. There was an undercurrent of masculine musk on him, cloaked in some exotic spice she couldn’t quite seem to get enough of. She rested her hands over his, leaning her head back against his sternum.
It could have been worse she told herself, the darkness, because he really was impressive, physically, emotionally, spiritually. His hands roved, taking liberties he’d sworn not to during the daylight hours. The sun was down now, and so all bets were off.
Kendra felt his rasped breaths against the back of her neck as his palms slid under her shirt, over her breasts. Her own hands betrayed her by latching onto his, holding him even closer.
“Is this Re’Hotep?” she asked, panting, reacting to his nearness.
“Yes,” he breathed. “Alessandro too. But not Merwet.” No, Merwet was just a little boy.
She smiled. “I might just keep you.”
He kissed her neck, working his way closer to her scars. They were closed now. At least infection wouldn’t be much of an issue. She hoped. She hadn’t thought of that before, the dangers of a
vampire boyfriend, or fiancé, or whatever.
“Hey, does this stuff ever lead to blood infections?” she asked.
Kendra felt his breath on her skin, now in a half-laugh. His hands tightened momentarily over her breasts, then slid back to her waist. “I shouldn’t be surprised by your questions. And yet I am.”
“Wouldn’t want me getting sick on you.”
“No. My essence will protect you.” He kissed the scars on her throat, Kendra stifling a moan upon contact, waves rippling through her. Her knees gave way and he caught her up. “You will still age, however,” he finished.
It took her a moment to recover. Finally she found her voice, and her feet, standing back up on her own power. “Unless I was like you.”
He stiffened. Then he kissed her throat again, Kendra sucking in a shuddered breath. He turned her around to face him. She was powerless as he arched her neck back to him.
“Which you won’t be,” he said, this time like he meant business.
“I was just…”
He lowered his head, lips working hot down her throat.
“Saying,” she finished.
“No,” he said, lifting his head and straightening her. She caught herself on his arm.
“Okay, obviously a touchy subject for you.”
He eyed her.
“How does that work, anyway?”
“Immortal mates?”
“Yes.”
“It’s dangerous. We would influence each other emotionally.”
“Like Sha’re influenced you?”
“Yes. Worse for me I think, because I had already loved her in our natural life.”
“Bad company and all,” she said stupidly.
“You don’t have to think about it,” he told her.
“Ten years from now we might.”
Dark brows narrowed. “I thought we were in agreement on this?”
“I was just saying.”
“You don’t want this. You do not want to be what I am.”
“I know.” She backed off. “You’re right. I don’t want it.”
His eyes softened. “Did I scare you, habibti?”
“It would take a lot more than that at this point.” Kendra touched his face, fingertips trailing over his beard. It was softer than it looked. “I’d kinda miss other things we’ve shared anyway.”
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