“I don’t know anything about a future husband, Buck. But I’ll remember those words of wisdom for sure.”
They all chuckled.
“So, what’re y’all working on? It seems pretty serious in here. Are y’all planning a party?” Buck smirked and looked at his wife.
“Carli wants to give riding lessons again, like she did in Georgia. She misses working with kids.” Lola looked to Carli and smiled, nodding encouragement. Lola and Buck shared a glance as if they were the only two in the room.
Carli thought it must be nice to have a special someone in your life. Someone who knew everything about you, and loved unconditionally, no matter what. No more tension or questions as to whether you both should be together. You just knew it was the right thing. That it would last forever. Carli wondered if it was even possible. Or just a fairy tale? Sometimes she felt so cheated that she never got to be included in a family with loving parents. Sure, her guardians, the Fitzgeralds, were kind, but they were older, and she often felt like a third wheel. She had no idea how a family functioned together. She chased her riding dreams and horse business, and sure the Fitzgeralds were always there when she came home, but she still felt like something was missing. It suddenly dawned on her as to why she habitually ran from relationships. Just about the time things got serious, she hightailed it out of there. Except for the one guy back home who had torn apart her trust and stomped on her heart on the worst day of her life. She had finally given in, with her whole heart. She thought he was the one. But he made the decision that it was over, and let Carli know by kissing her biggest rival at the horse show. Right in front of her, no less. That image never goes away. Her heart still stings. But now here was how it was supposed to work, right in front of her eyes with Buck and Lola. Trusting someone completely had to be possible. That gave her some hope.
But she couldn’t think about romance right now. Not without ruining the friendship she enjoyed with Nathan. Not by giving in to the attraction she felt for Lank. Or giving any notice to those other good-looking Texas cowboys that crossed her path. She had a ranch to run, a birth father to find, and a troubled young lady to help. Affairs of the heart were way down on her list. For the moment anyway.
Chapter Six
Saturday morning dawned crisp and cold, but the network meteorologist predicted a mild day over forty degrees, almost fifty. Of course, what the weatherman said in relation to the Texas Panhandle hardly carried any weight. Carli noticed the topic was continually of interest to everyone who lived here. After the predictions were discussed, conversation then turned to the dramatic difference between the forecast and the actual conditions on the days, weeks, even years prior. It seemed as though rural people could talk for hours about the weather. It wasn’t just a topic to pass the time, rather more like a detailed recap of their favorite team sport. And they were serious about their sports, too.
Carli’s step was light and hurried as she walked to the corral. She had just answered a text from Lexi’s mother. They were on their way, and she needed to make a few preparations. Before she knew it, she heard tires crunching on the gravel drive.
An older model Ford SUV pulled slowly into headquarters, and the mother from the coffee shop got out of the car. As Carli walked closer, she could see the young girl in the backseat. The mom’s frustrated face said it all. “Lexi doesn’t want to get out. Said she’ll wait in the car. She’s just impossible. I don’t know what to do with her anymore.” The woman’s head shook back and forth, and her hands fluttered like birds’ wings. Luckily, the windows were up; Carli hoped Lexi didn’t hear that.
Lexi’s brother Brandon waved from the front seat and Carli waved back, and then she placed a hand on the mother’s shoulder. “Let me try. I’ll be right back.”
Carli hurried to the pen where she had Sally tied to the fence rail. She took the halter rope and led her out, stopping next to Lexi’s side of the vehicle. She leaned down and tapped on the glass until she got Lexi’s attention, then smiled while making the motion to open the window.
After a few minutes, the window slowly slid down. “What?” Lexi added a scowl.
“Remember me? I’m Carli. This is Sally and she needs exercise. Thought you might like to help us out and ride her today.”
Lexi grunted but couldn’t hide the excitement reflected on her face as she looked at the bay-colored horse with the kind eyes. The car window immediately went back up.
“I completely forgot to introduce myself.” The woman offered her hand to Carli before scratching Sally between the ears. “I’m Emily Brown. And you remember Brandon and Lexi.”
“It’s really nice to see you again. I’m so glad you brought Lexi to visit.”
“I’d like to leave her here while I take Brandon and run some errands. We need to find him some new jeans.” She lowered her voice and turned her back to the car. “Honestly, I’m afraid to leave Lexi at home alone. She seems so out of sorts lately. I can’t figure out what’s going on in her head, and, of course, I’m the last person she’ll ever talk to.”
“She’s welcome here any time. We’ll do fine.”
Emily turned her attention to her daughter, and with a deep frown said in a low voice just to Carli, “Now, if we can just get her out of the car.”
“Will you come and meet Sally?” Carli looked at Lexi with pleading eyes.
Lexi ducked her head, pretending to ignore them both and then the door swung open. Her long, jet black hair sported bright pink highlights on the ends, spikes on top, and this time her nails were painted bright purple. Wearing almost the identical black outfit she had on at the coffee shop, she placed both hands on either side of Sally’s face and drew the animal’s nose into her belly. She closed her eyes and froze.
“You know your way around a horse, I see.” Carli couldn’t help but smile.
“Yes, we had several horses, but then my hours got cut at work and I just couldn’t afford the feed any longer. They went to a local rescue and were adopted out.” Emily answered before her daughter could reply. “If you’re good here, I’ll be back in about an hour.”
While Lexi was distracted, Emily hurried around her car, jumped in, and was gone. Carli watched Lexi carefully for signs of a meltdown like she had witnessed over the muffin incident. So far, so good. Her mother did not say goodbye, and never really spoke directly to her daughter. Instead, she stepped on the gas and peeled out like there was a monster on her tail. Carli pushed away sadness and curiosity about the family’s dynamics and turned her attention instead to the girl dressed in black.
“C’mon. Let’s start with brushing her and then we’ll get her saddled.”
Lexi barely gave a nod. A motion of her head so slight Carli would have missed it if she hadn’t been watching closely. They all walked into the corral and Carli handed the girl a brush.
Lexi did a good job, giving the right amount of pressure to get the dirt out of Sally's coat but at the same time she had a gentle touch.
“What was your horse’s name?” Carli asked. Silence from her new friend. Carli only heard the twitter of a few birds high in the elm tree and one of the horses stomped a foot.
Buck passed through stopping to greet their visitor. “Mornin’, girls.”
“Hey Buck, this is my new friend Lexi.”
The girl gave the ranch foreman a shy, half-smile for a split second before focusing back on the horse.
Buck rattled around in the tack room for a few minutes. “I’m headed to check the North Pasture fence line and scatter some mineral around, Miss Carli.”
“Thanks, Buck.” Carli turned her attention back to Lexi.
“The grass is greening up. I’m hoping for some rain soon. You girls have a nice ride.” Buck tipped his hat brim before leaving.
It was most likely pouring sheets of rain in Georgia this time of year, but here the air was dusty and dry. She glanced at Lexi. Carli never was any good at small talk, and obviously Lexi wasn’t interested in it either. Carli felt helpless, yet a mil
lion things waiting to be said ran through her mind. Lexi reminded her so much of her younger self. Angry at the world, frustration. The feeling of despondency, lack of control, like things will never change, never get any better. Futility. Carli understood the storm inside this girl, churning away until there’s nothing left but defiance and rage...and loneliness.
Giving up on any efforts to have a conversation, Carli left Lexi brushing Sally while she saddled Beau. Then she helped Lexi saddle up, and they were off. “Let’s go along the creek. It’s a pretty ride, plus good exercise for the horses. Lots of logs to walk around or over.”
Carli bit her lip as Lexi slipped her combat boots into the stirrups. Surprisingly, they fit. They started out in the round pen where the horses plodded along at a relaxed walk. Carli noticed Lexi patting the neck of her horse, which warmed her heart. She even wondered what it would be like to have a daughter, kind of an unlikely thought for her. Still young, not to mention her messed up family history.
“Itchy.” Lexi’s voice broke the silence.
“What?” Carli barely understood her, she spoke so softly. “Is something wrong?”
“My horse’s name was Itchy.”
“Hands down, the best horse name ever.” Carli smiled and glanced at Lexi.
“She liked to be scratched.” They both giggled.
A peace settled over them as they urged their horses through a gate out of the round pen and down a slope to a narrow stream of water. Lexi nudged Sally and passed Carli on a wide spot beneath the cottonwood trees, crossing the dry creek bed and up the other side.
Carli followed. That was the start of a conversation, but she was afraid to ask anything more. Lexi might clam up again. They rode in silence, circling the fishpond and returning to headquarters. Lexi didn’t utter another word and neither did Carli. The young girl seemed to enjoy the freedom, the breeze on her face, not having to smile at anyone or answer, the warm, rhythmic feel of the horse. Twigs snapped and horse hooves plodding along the ground echoed around them. The camaraderie of riding with someone. They made quite a pair—one angry teen just starting out and an uncertain young woman trying to figure out the direction of her life.
When they returned to headquarters, Lexi’s mother and brother were standing at the gate watching them ride up the hill into the pens.
“I see both of you are smiling. Did y’all have fun?” Emily called out.
“Yes, we did,” said Carli. “I’ll have her back to you in a minute after we unsaddle.”
Without a word Lexi managed to pull Sally's saddle off, put everything back in its place in the tack room, then stopped to watch both horses rolling in the dirt before she headed to the SUV. Carli followed and before the girl got into the car, she touched her shoulder. “Lexi. I hope you’ll come back. Put my number in your phone. You’re welcome here anytime.”
“I will,” she said before hunkering down in the back seat and slamming the door.
It almost sounded like a mumbled “thanks” followed, but Carli wasn’t sure she heard that.
“This is a first. A daughter without a deep scowl on her face,” Emily said. “Thank you.” Tears bubbled in her eyes and she looked at Carli as if to say more, but she bit her lip instead and got into the driver’s seat.
Carli waved as they drove away and couldn’t help but notice the carefree, smiling girl on the horse had suddenly transformed into the dark, morose teenager again. It was a start, but was it something Carli wanted to pursue? The kids in this area were not polished and moneyed like some of her clients in Atlanta. She hoped the Texas youth would be more down-to-earth and excited about coming to her ranch. Would she be able to teach them anything?
“God, put me on the right path. Will a riding school help anybody?” Carli whispered as she watched the taillights of the Brown family’s car slow with a bump-de-bump over the cattle guard and then turn to disappear into a thicket of mesquite.
Chapter Seven
By the time Carli unsaddled Beau after her ride with Lexi and checked the horses’ water, she felt energized. Just the short time with Lexi reminded her how much she missed working with young people. She still had some self-doubt about opening a riding school, about everything she did, actually, but the feeling in her gut was that it was what she truly wanted. Sharing her love of horses with others gave her so much joy.
While she was in the barn breaking off a flake of hay, Lank walked up behind her. Despite the early spring chill, he wore only a Tee-shirt. She tried not to notice his muscled arms, the glisten of sweat at the base of his throat, and black hair that had grown longer, just past his shirt collar. And then she made the mistake of lifting her gaze to stare into his smoky-gray eyes. Her heart fluttered. She forced herself to look away.
“Who was that?” he asked.
“A young girl I met at the B&R Beanery. She used to have a horse and I invited her out to ride.” Carli’s first instinct was to tell him everything. Her fears about unlocking whatever was going on inside Lexi. Riding lessons and working with kids again. Worries about finding clients. What if she put out the information and nobody came? So many things to talk about, yet she held back. Would it be appropriate? She didn’t need any complications. He was her hired ranch hand. But she felt drawn to him. She couldn’t deny that.
“What was with all the black? Somebody die?” He leaned against the pipe fence, draping one arm across the top rail, and rested a dusty boot on the bottom rail.
Carli stared again and he met her stare back. Annoyed by his arrogant confidence, never afraid to say just what was on his mind. She sighed. And then her pulse raced, and she knew at that moment she was in a heap of trouble and would not survive the fallout. Stop it, you idiot girl. Best keep this on a professional level.
“I think Lexi, that’s her name, is having an identity crisis. But nothing a good horse ride can’t fix.” Carli laughed.
“Not sure if horses can fix teenagers, but I agree it’s worth a try.”
“Horses fixed me, and I had more troubles than you could ever imagine,” Carli confessed. She noted the look of surprise on his face.
“So, you were an at-risk kid, were you?” Lank stepped closer, genuine concern emanating from those eyes of his.
“At-risk kid? What does that mean?” Carli ignored the look on his handsome face and didn’t offer any more specifics about her own situation.
“My mom used to volunteer at a facility in Amarillo. It’s for kids who come from horrible family situations. Maybe abandoned by their parents because of drugs, or whatever. The point is to help them before they end up in jail or become a druggie.”
“At-risk,” Carli repeated. She wanted to help those kinds of kids and she could do it right here at the Wild Cow. She wanted to ask Lank more about it but instead her tongue was tied as she looked at him, and then she took a step closer before she could stop her body from moving.
“Something on your mind?” he asked.
Carli needed a friend. She needed someone to listen. Someone who could be a sounding board for all of the ideas that were running through her head. Nathan was a great listener, but then there was Lank, too. He knew the ranch. Knew the horses. He wasn’t Nathan. She took another step closer.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about Lexi and other kids like her. Maybe they need a place to come. Maybe horses would be something they could channel their energy into.”
“That would be great. I’ve loved horses since I could walk and thank goodness my parents allowed me to join the high school rodeo team.”
“You rodeoed?”
“Bare-back broncs. But then an injury shortened my career. Bad concussion and, for my mom’s sake, I promised not to ride again. I was on my way to the National Finals, or so everybody told me.” A sullen frown crossed his face and he suddenly stopped talking.
“Now that your mom is gone, are you going to rodeo again?”
“Naw, I’m too old now. This body has been through a lot of wrecks.” He laughed.
“I’d l
ike to hear about them sometime.” Carli clamped her lips together and silently cursed herself. Why that came out of her mouth, she’d never know. She had to keep it professional between them. Boss and ranch hand. She had to keep reminding herself.
Lank didn’t reply but clenched his jaw and looked at her with a sadness in his eyes that made her heart ache.
Carli wondered about the emotion that he usually hid, and if it was due to the memories of his rodeo days or of his mom that had suddenly turned him sullen.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She broke eye contact to look at the screen. “Sorry. I should take this.” She spun around and walked towards the gate. “Nate. Hi.” She glanced back at Lank, planning to wave goodbye but she couldn’t help notice the frown still etched on his face and the deep sadness in his eyes as he watched her walk away.
“Why don’t you just come over here? We can cook something at my house.” Carli ended the call and turned to face Lank again. “I guess Nathan is coming for dinner. I’ll see you around.”
“Yeah. See ya,” Lank mumbled, his eyes cold, “Boss.”
The last word uttered hard, with a tinge of aggravation. She spun on her heel, turned her back to him, and walked out of the corral. Carli wanted more than anything to turn around and tell him she was sorry he had to give up something he loved. But she kept walking.
Chapter Eight
A rap on her front door reminded Carli she had invited Nathan over for dinner. In the middle of searching online newspapers for any mention of her birth father or his family, she quickly shut it down, jumped up from the laptop, and hurried to let him in.
“Time got away from me. What do you want to eat?”
Nathan laughed. “Well, what’a ya got?” He followed her into the kitchen. Stopping in his tracks, he turned around slowly. “I haven’t been in here for a long time. Your grandmother Jean was a character.”
Follow a Wild Heart: A Christian Contemporary Western Romance Series Page 4