ALL HE DESIRES (Voluptuous Woman Series)

by Jackson, Brenda

  Justice picked an apple from the fruit bowl and took a bite before saying. “Guilty as charged.”

  “Then why haven’t you brought him to dinner? Don and I would love to meet him.”

  Justice sighed. And she would love for them to meet him, too. “I didn’t see the need since he was only going to be here for a short while.”

  “Oh.”

  A part of Justice knew that response hadn’t satisfied her mother’s curiosity, but Marie wouldn’t ask or push the issue. She believed in letting her kids live their own lives and keep their privacy if they felt they needed it.

  “Mom?”

  “Yes, sweetheart?”

  “Why did you, Aunt Lois, and Aunt Katy get married so many times before the three of you could truly be happy?”

  Marie tossed the dishtowel aside as she watched her only daughter study the apple she had already taken a big bite out of. Her heart immediately went out to her. She had an idea what was bothering Justice and what issues were plaguing her. Over the years she had hoped and prayed that she would come to her about it so the two of them could talk. On several occasions she had brought up the subject herself, but each time she had tried talking about her past marriages, Justice hadn’t wanted to hear anything about them. Evidently things were different now and after her conversation with Thelma Savoy, she had an idea why.

  Marie came to the table and took the chair next to Justice. “When I think about the reason, it seems real simple now but to me, Lois, and Katy it wasn’t then. Your aunts and I were raised believing that sex with any man was dirty and deplorable. Our mother instilled in us the belief it was something awful and degrading.”

  Justice’s eyes widened. “Why?”

  Marie shrugged. “Probably because she was a single mother with three daughters and worked a lot, both day and night. I think she saw telling us that was her way of making sure we never made the same mistakes that she did by getting pregnant in our teens. Her intent was good but the message was damaging since the three of us grew up hating the very thought of having sex.”

  Marie paused, thinking about that difficult time in her life and what it had cost her. “When we got married our feelings about sex didn’t change, so I can’t fault your father for looking elsewhere for needs he had to have filled. He put up with it for as long as he could and then he just couldn’t take it anymore. I never blamed him for leaving me, Justice, you know that.”

  Justice nodded. She had never understood why until now.

  “Then with Frank Hill, I thought I could be different, but I couldn’t,” Marie continued. “The moment he touched me I would freeze up and freak out, no matter how gentle he was. Pretty soon he got fed up and start looking elsewhere for satisfaction since he wasn’t getting it at home, so I couldn’t blame him either.”

  Justice leaned back in her chair, hearing but not wanting to believe what her mother was saying. She’d always thought her mother and aunts were the sexiest and sensuous women on earth. Although they never went out of their way to flaunt it, in her mind they certainly looked the part.

  “What made you decide to take a chance on Don?” she asked softly, reaching over with her finger to wipe away a tear that threatened to fall from her mother’s eye.

  Her mother chuckled softly. “Maybe you should be asking what made Don decide to take a chance on me. He’d been asking me out for months and I kept turning him down but I knew deep down that I was falling in love with him. Then one day I woke up and realized I had a problem and needed help. I called Lois and Katy over and we talked and realized we had pretty much the same issues which were the reasons we could not get anywhere in the intimacy department. So the three of us decided to get help. A lot of folks see getting therapy as an admission of weakness, but for the three of us, we saw it as survival, a way to have a better and more rewarding life. After a few sessions we knew getting therapy wasn’t a weakness but a strength. It’s not easy to admit when you have problems and it’s harder still to be willing to do something about them. We did, and over time we were strong enough, self-confident enough and determined enough to get our lives on the right track. Lois met and fell in love with Carl, Katy met and fell in love with Joe, and I finally acknowledged my love for Don, and today my sisters and I are very happy with the men in our lives.”

  A radiant smile touched Marie’s lips. “Don is wonderful and everything I need. With him I glory in the fact that I’m a woman, a very sensuous woman, and it’s like I’ve never had any hang-ups about sex at all. I told him everything and he understood and was there to help me turn things around. He is the best thing to ever happen to me and I am truly happy.”

  Marie reached out and took her daughter’s hand in hers. “Just like I want you to be happy, sweetheart. I didn’t turn you against sex like my mother did me, and I hadn’t realized until you turned down Harold’s marriage proposal that you had a problem with committing your life to anyone. I tried to bring the subject up a few times but you didn’t want to talk about it. I’m curious as to why you wanted answers now.”

  Justice closed her eyes. She was willing to admit to her mother something she hadn’t yet admitted to herself. She loved Blake. She couldn’t refuse to believe that fact anymore. It didn’t matter to her that they had met less than a month ago, what really mattered was how she felt.

  She opened her eyes and met her mother’s gaze. “The reason I wanted to know is because I’ve fallen in love with Blake Savoy. I didn’t want to love him but I couldn’t help it. From that first day I saw him he touched my heart. I tried to convince myself it was all physical but deep down I knew that it wasn’t. And you’re right. I don’t have a hang-up with sex so that’s not an issue. The issue was whether or not I could commit to anyone and until you told me what you just did, I didn’t think I could. But now I truly believe that I can try. I appreciate your sharing this with me. It really explains a lot, Mom.”

  Marie smiled. “So now that you understand, what do you plan to do?”

  Justice wiped a tear away from her eyes when she thought about what she was about to lose. “I don’t know. I really don’t know.”

  Ten

  Justice inhaled deeply as she pulled into Thelma Savoy’s driveway. Cars were everywhere and when she recognized the one belonging to her brother, she remembered the Savoy cousins were playing basketball this evening.

  Blake would be leaving at noon tomorrow, flying out to visit his parents for a week in Texas. Although he had told her he would be coming by and spending time with her tonight, she needed to see him now and say what she had to say. She had no idea how he felt about her but she intended to tell him how she felt about him. She wanted him to know that the nights she had spent in his arms had meant more to her than just sex.

  Taking off her sunglasses she decided not to disturb Gramma Thelma by going to the door but would walk around to the back of the yard since she knew that’s where the guys were. Her breath caught in her throat the moment she rounded the corner and her gaze immediately latched onto Blake. He was shirtless and the gym shorts he was wearing blatantly showed all the attributes of his athletic body. He was unadulterated male and the sight of him made her pause. But that didn’t stop her heart from beating faster in her chest as she saw the sweat that covered his dark skin.

  Her gaze moved to his broad shoulders and she remembered the bite mark she had put there the night before. He’d been on top of her, thrusting in and out, driving her insane, wild, out of control, determined to give her the most incredible orgasm she’d ever had and when he’d succeeded, she had tried smothering her scream in the blade of his shoulder and had unintentionally bit him, leaving her mark. He’d been too wrapped up in his own release to notice the pain and when he did, smiled and simply said she had branded him.

  She smiled at the memory, thinking that Blake Savoy was the most incredible lover and the most caring, sensitive and giving human being that she knew. During their talks he had shared with her some of the foundations he had put into place to
help underprivileged kids and how closely he worked with the Historically Black Colleges to assure that deserving students had a chance for a college education.

  “Hey, Blake, your woman’s here.”

  Tyler’s statement got Blake’s attention, as well as reclaimed hers. He stopped playing in the middle of a pivot and caught her gaze. He smiled, turned and made a perfect shot into the basket then shouted, “Time out and if I’m not back in five minutes continue without me.”

  It seemed that all his cousins watched with interest as he made his way across the yard. The moment he reached her, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, not caring who was looking. In a way it seemed that he was staking his claim, letting his family know without a doubt that she meant something to him, and that’s what she needed to know - just what she meant to him. For all she knew, he was only sharing a vacation fling with her since that’s how things originally started out. But a part of her wanted to believe that Blake felt more for her than that although he’d never said so. And the bottom line was she had to find out.

  A smile touched her lips when he released her mouth. “Hi.”

  “Hi, sweetheart. You’re a pleasant surprise,” he said huskily.

  “Thanks. I hate to take you away from your game but I was wondering if we can talk for a few minutes.”

  He lifted a brow. “Sure. Come on inside the house. Gramma went to Richmond with Aunt Bessie and won’t be back until late tonight.”

  Justice nodded as he opened the back door for her and she stepped inside the house. “Where’s Bryan? I saw his car out front?”

  Blake shrugged. “Umm, I don’t know. He was playing with the rest of us and suddenly called time-out and came inside. We figured he took a bathroom break but that was over fifteen minutes ago.”

  “Oh,” she said. She followed Blake down the hall that led to the basement. “Why are we going to the basement?”

  “That’s where the darkroom is located, and I thought you’d like to see the photos we took at the party yesterday.”

  She glanced up at him. “I’d love to see them.” As soon as they reached the bottom step to the basement they stopped. It seemed the huge room was already occupied. There stood Bryan and Tonya, wrapped in each other’s arms kissing like there was no tomorrow.

  Justice smiled. Evidently her brother had taken her advice like she had taken his. “Should we clear our throats to let them know that we’re here, Blake?” she whispered.

  Blake chuckled softly. “I doubt it will do any good at this point,” he whispered back. “What you see has been a long time coming and I’m glad they’ve finally gotten things together. For a while the cousins and I thought we would have to beat the crap out of your brother to make him see the light, and we regretted the thought of doing that since he is such a good friend and all.”

  Justice giggled. “Bryan has always loved Tonya. He told me as much, but he was afraid the type of job he has would interfere with a relationship with her. Evidently, he got things worked out.”

  “Well, all I can say is that it’s about time.”

  Justice had to agree. When Blake took her hand in his, he led her through an area where the darkroom was located. The room lived up to its name since it was truly dark. After closing the door behind him, he switched on a small lamp in the corner.

  “So, what do you want to talk to me about?” he asked, coming to stand directly in front of her.

  Breath rushed out of Justice’s lungs in a nervous sigh. She didn’t know where to begin. “I need to know something, Blake.”

  He heard the nervousness in her voice and met her gaze as he gently released her from his embrace. “All right. What do you want to know?”

  She inhaled deeply. “What we shared the past three weeks, I need to know what it means to you.”

  He lifted a brow, confused as to where she was going with things. He searched her face intently. “Maybe I should be asking you the same question, Justice.”

  “Yes, but I asked you first.”

  Yes, he agreed. She had. And she had definitely put him in a dilemma. If he told her the truth, that he loved her senseless, would she back away because of her fear of commitment? And if he lied and pretended he viewed what they shared as nothing but a no-strings affair, would that make her happy although it would make him miserable?

  He sighed and decided he would make a decision with a flip of a coin. He reached out and picked up a quarter that had been left on the table. Heads she got the truth and tails he would lie.

  Blake knew Justice was confused with what he was doing but he flipped the coin and it landed on . . . tails.

  Damn.

  He closed his eyes tight, refusing to believe that the outcome meant he had to lie to her.

  “Blake? What is it? What’s wrong? Why did you flip that coin?”

  Justice’s question made him reopen his eyes and the only thing he could think about was the fact that he could not and would not lie to her. He had to tell her the truth no matter how she took it, even if it meant she put distance between them by not visiting him in Canada for the holidays. Honesty and not lies had to always be between them. Hadn’t his grandmother preached that one lie only led to another, then another?

  He met her confused gaze. “The reason I flipped the coin was trying to make a decision that I didn’t want to make and thought I needed help. Well, the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, so I’m going to do what I know is the right thing and what I should have done in the beginning and follow my heart, no matter how things turn out because I believe in the end the truth will win.”

  Justice nodded, although she was still confused and getting more confused by the minute. “All right. Now will you tell me what these past three weeks have meant to you?”

  He pulled her back into his arms and met her gaze after inhaling a slow, deep breath. “These past three weeks have meant more to me than you’d ever know, Justice, because I found something that I thought was lost to me forever,” he whispered softly.

  Nervous tension swirled around in her belly. “What?”

  “Love. Don’t ask me how or why. All I know is we may have started out with one goal in mind but somehow along the way my emotions rebelled and I fell in love with you. In truth, I believe I fell in love with you the first moment I saw you that day, in Tonya’s basement. I never believed in love at first sight until that day.”

  Justice blinked back the tears that gathered in her eyes. Acceptance unfolded within her as her mind consumed Blake’s words. She gazed into the depths of his hazel eyes and saw the truth in what he’d said. “I’m glad to hear that Blake, since I’ve fallen in love with you, too. I had issues to work out that were keeping me from committing my life to anyone and now I’m resolving those issues. And I’m free to love and to admit my love and I want to admit loving you. I believe I fell in love with you that day in Tonya’s basement as well.”

  That’s all Blake needed to hear and he knew she had spoken from her heart the same way he had. “Does that mean that sometime in the near future there will be a Savoy-Manning wedding?”

  Justice laughed throatily as she swiped away the tears from her eyes. “Yes, possibly more than one if I know my brother. Now that he’s staked a claim on Tonya, he won’t waste any time getting her to the altar. But as far as we’re concerned, if marriage is what you want then marriage is what you’ll get.”

  “Yes, it’s what I want, among other things,” Blake said, kissing the corner of her lips. “I also want to be the father of all your babies and if you’re not willing to leave here and travel with me, I’ll understand.”

  Justice shook her head. She knew Blake’s first wife wouldn’t travel with him and refused to take that same position. Besides, her business was at a point where her office manager could run things quite efficiently. “But I am willing to travel with you, Blake. I’d love to visit all those places you go as your wife, your soulmate and the mother of your children.”

  Filled with happiness beyond belief, Bla
ke framed Justice’s face in his hands and lowered his head and kissed her, long and deep, and with all the love in his heart. They both had tempted fate and with a flip of the coin, had lost. But a Higher Being had interceded and decided it was meant for them to join their lives together forever.

  And everyone knows that He has the last word.

  Epilogue

  Four months later

  It was decided that there would be a double wedding since it wasn’t every day that two Savoys married two Mannings.

  It was a beautiful day for a wedding and the church had been packed. The brides, best friends for life, had chosen well and knew they would spend the rest of their lives happy with their mates.

  Bryan and Tonya had made plans to go to Bermuda on their honeymoon and Blake and Justice would spend a week in Hawaii before heading for Canada. Justice was excited about the trip and looked forward to going. Bryan and Tonya had promised to visit them the first opportunity they had now that Bryan was no longer an FBI agent out in the field but had taken a teaching position at the Bureau’s academy.

  It was time for the bridal couples to leave the reception to embark on their honeymoons, and the brides had escaped to change clothes.

  Tonya placed several beautiful gift-wrapped boxes in Justice’s arms. Justice smiled, recognizing the red box and black bow as the traditional signature packaging of Tonya’s Temptations. Anyone ordering from the Internet company received their merchandise in the beautiful package. Justice also knew that once she opened the boxes, in each one she would also find the traditional red silk rose lying atop the black tissue paper.

  “Should I guess what’s in here?” she asked Tonya.

  Tonya laughed. “In those boxes are items you thought you’d never wear since you would never marry but I happen to know of one particular man who would love seeing you in them . . . again.”