Kaislyn’s shaking wasn’t from the poison anymore.
This was bad, girl.
“You think?” Kaislyn snarled.
“I think a lot of things,” said Jaden. “Come on, let’s get you settled somewhere else.”
He advanced on her. Kaislyn was holding the sword wrong if she intended to fight with it. She wasn’t. She threw it, hoping it would distract Jaden. He ducked, but the momentum of throwing the blade sent Kaislyn stumbling straight into him. They fell to the ground.
“Recreating our first fight, Kaislyn?” Jaden grunted. “You lost that one.”
They both grappled for the knife at Jaden’s waist. Kaislyn’s shaking fingers slipped on the hilt. Jaden gained control of it and Kaislyn rolled away before he could stab her. She crashed into the table. The wine glass rocked.
Kaislyn scrambled to her feet. Fumbling for the wine glass behind her, she broke it on the table’s edge. The wine spilled over her hand. She grabbed the broken pieces, gasping as the glass shred her palm.
Jaden rose to his feet. Eyes bright, lips parted, he lunged at her.
Kaislyn dodged, but the dagger connected with her shoulder, slicing along it and down her arm. Twisting inwards, she came up close against Jaden’s body. She rammed the fistful of glass into his face.
Jaden recoiled. A dozen cuts lacerated his cheek. They glittered in the light from bits of embedded glass. He touched his cheek and then looked at his fingers, red with blood. His gaze slowly transferred to her. The condescension, the amusement of seeing her struggle against him vanished. His eyes dulled; the expression on his face turned analytical. He walked silently toward her.
She was accustomed to Ikaros’ wild demonstrations of homicidal rage. Jaden’s methodical calmness terrified her.
Kaislyn retreated around the table and tripped on the carpet edge. Rolling over, she clutched the wineskin against her like a shield as Jaden appeared in her line of vision. She stared up at him. At the droplets of wine and blood trickling down his face.
He stood over her. Studying her, he changed his grip on the dagger, clutching it in a fist. The only sign of what he was thinking or feeling behind that serene exterior.
Kaislyn kept her gaze fixed on his as he leaned over her.
He kept leaning.
Falling forward, he landed beside her. The dagger rolled loose from his hand as a violent tremor coursed through his body.
Kaislyn closed her eyes, but she could feel the convulsions through the carpet.
A minute later they stopped.
Kaislyn turned the other way, using the table for support as she got to her feet. Only then, did she dare to look.
Jaden lay still, his face emptier than before, his eyes staring unseeing at the ceiling. A dribble of foam slid down his chin.
“You should have stayed a thief,” Kaislyn whispered. “Politics and assassinations isn’t a game you could ever have played and won. Not the way Ikaros and I play. We cheat.”
Shaking, she retrieved his dagger, tucking it into her boot, and grabbed the sword again to use as a walking stick. She retreated to the beach beyond the house. There, she discarded the sword for a sturdy piece of driftwood. She avoided the main roads before finding some thick bushes to pass out it in.
She woke up around dawn to throw up. Her body still ached from the seizures and her lacerated palm stung.
“Can’t leave that alone, girl.” Her voice sounded foreign to her, hoarse and weary. Old.
Using Jaden’s dagger to first rip the bottom of her shirt off for a makeshift bandage, she began to pick out the bits of glass from her palm. She fainted only once in the process. Eventually, she was convinced she’d gotten out every piece that she could. She wrapped her hand tightly, fumbling to knot it.
She swallowed a potion from her belt and slept the rest of the day and next night. The following morning, she started back for the mountains. Edging around the Third City, she sought out lesser-used roads, hiding whenever she saw someone coming. She reached the mountains late in the evening.
She couldn’t stop thinking of Jaden and what she’d done.
4 | Winter Plans
She arrived in Grehesh’s village late in a winter’s evening, her clothes and boots soaked, and her teeth chattering from the cold. She’d had to Shift multiple times to avoid meeting Ikaros, landing eventually in winter where he left her alone. Grehesh was in one of his grandchildren’s homes, and no one seemed surprised at Kaislyn’s sudden appearance.
“I think everyone has gotten used to you popping up at strange moments,” said Grehesh. His chair had been moved inside and he rocked comfortably next to the fire while Kaislyn shivered under several layers of borrowed clothes and blankets. Two dogs crowded her for a prime spot by the fire. They were alone in the dark, warm room, Grehesh’s family busying themselves in the other room of the house.
“I think I have pneumonia again. Breathing’s hard.”
“What will happen if you reach a point where you can’t physically breathe anymore from dying so many times?”
Kaislyn opened her mouth and then closed it. “That sounds uncomfortable.”
Grehesh shook his head. “More than uncomfortable, child. How many people do you know who don’t need to breathe in their birth life? If you keep going this way, you won’t be able to return to your birth life without dying for good.”
“I... hadn’t thought of that.” She pulled her blankets tighter, shivering, not from the cold, but from the idea of not being able to return to her birth life. Or, not being able to return without suffocating. She wondered if Ikaros had reached that point? It would make killing him easier.
“Why were you so desperate to avoid the Sorcerer you would rather freeze to death in the snow?” Grehesh asked.
“I just didn’t feel like dealing with him right now.” She kept her gaze on the fire.
“Your hair is different.” Grehesh’s voice blended in comfortingly with the crackling flames. “What did your mother think of it?”
“She hasn’t seen it.”
“I suspect she won’t like it. It brings out more of Drazan’s features in your face, and she was always pleased by how much you resembled her instead of him.”
Kaislyn swallowed a lump in her throat. “I wouldn’t know. She doesn’t talk to me.”
“Svetlana does not talk to anyone. That isn’t a reason why you shouldn’t talk to her.”
“Ikaros cut it off.”
“You stood still long enough for him to do that? Did you lose another rubbish contest between the two of you?”
The criticism in Grehesh’s voice rankled. “No, I did not!” The force of her denial started a spat of coughing and it was a few minutes before she could continue. “It wasn’t like he was just a crazy old Sorcerer in the mountains. He was the Phoenix King. I was trying to help Athalia and instead I... I got three different people killed and Ikaros won again.” The words tumbled out, not always coherently but they came, and Kaislyn told Grehesh everything that had happened with Ikaros, Athalia, Zarif. She ended with Jaden in the Third City, her voice a scratchy whisper.
Grehesh’s rocking remained as steady as ever.
“He’s dead now,” Kaislyn finished tonelessly. “I killed him too. And now all I can think about is your stupid words about dethroning kings. Zarif’s right. I am arrogant. I don’t want to mess up anymore. I don’t want to get more people killed.”
“So you get yourself killed in the snow for penance,” Grehesh murmured.
“At least for me it doesn’t stick.”
“Yet,” Grehesh said as Kaislyn began to cough again. He waited until she’d finished before continuing. “Jaden always disturbed me. You had a blind spot for him and sacrificed far more for him than he ever did for you.”
Kaislyn closed her eyes. “We were friends. I don’t understand what happened.”
“You were young and angry. You wanted to hurt the cities and your parents for what had happened to you. Jaden was power hungry but lazy. He o
nly lacked someone to do the grunt work for him. I doubt Ikaros had to do a lot of manipulating.”
Kaislyn hugged her knees against her chest and watched the fire burn. “That’s a nice way of saying it’s not my fault.”
“Jaden made his own decisions. As far as what you’re responsible for...” Grehesh hesitated.
“I fixed,” supplied Kaislyn. She still felt awful about Jaden but the crushing guilt over what she had done began to diminish.
The fire had faded to a warm, orange glow and Grehesh rose to add another log. “How will you fix Zarif?”
A new wave of guilt rose. “Well, I probably shouldn’t kill him,” she said and instantly regretted the cavalier words.
“Probably,” Grehesh replied at last. The mild disapproval in his voice served as sharp a rebuke to her words as if he’d lectured her.
Kaislyn swallowed. “I need to apologize to him. He’ll be insufferable afterwards, but I deserve it.”
“No.”
“Oh, I deserve it,” Kaislyn said bitterly.
“What kind of apology will this be if even now you are so condescending and scornful of his response and of your need to apologize in the first place? By your own admission you betrayed Zarif. He has every right to be furious with you. He has every right to be the condescending one. Zarif has done more for you than any other person—”
See girl? Not alone.
Shut up!
“—and you should not face him until you can offer him nothing but an honest apology and take whatever happens afterwards humbly.”
“This is why I went to see Jaden! He doesn’t—didn’t—make me feel guilty.”
Grehesh’s silence was louder than if he’d shouted.
“You want me to tell Zarif the truth.”
“I suspect he knows most of it,” Grehesh said, voice so bland that Kaislyn darted a glance at him. His grey eyes twinkled a little at her. “I might make you feel guilty, but I am also very proud of you, Kaislyn.”
“Even after I killed those people?”
“Did you never stop to think that is what separates you from Ikaros? He doesn’t think twice about killing people. The First Bloody Year was his way of having a tantrum. You accidently kill someone and their death haunts you.”
“So I should be happy I’m so miserable?”
“You should be grateful that you aren’t Ikaros. You should look for a way to atone for those deaths.”
“And Athalia?”
“I suspect the former queen of the Five Cities is more than capable of taking care of herself. If you want my opinion—”
“Haven’t you been giving it already?”
“No. I have been giving you facts and reality. If you want my opinion, I would suggest you attend to Athalia and Ikaros first. Leave Zarif until you are calmer.”
Kaislyn blinked. “Calmer?”
“You don’t think very sensibly around him.” Kaislyn could hear the smile his voice. “Work out some of your jitters against Ikaros and you will feel much better to then apologize.”
It was too embarrassing to answer so Kaislyn didn’t.
A peaceful silence fell between them.
“You tricked me,” Kaislyn murmured, dozing off to sleep at last. “The only thing worse than talking about all this would have been talking about Sveka and you started with her first.”
Her only answer was the steady rocking of the chair.
Kaislyn woke several days later healed and vibrating with energy. She felt like climbing a mountain or jumping off a cliff. Maybe both. She hadn’t just woken from a coma, but from the self-pity she’d been wallowing in since Ikaros had beaten her, literally and figuratively, in Ti-em.
The house was empty and when she ventured outside into a world thick and white with snow, she found Grehesh helping his son and grandson chopping and stacking wood in an open shed. The grandson looked like he’d recently had a growth spurt and didn’t know what to do with his suddenly-lengthened limbs. With a start she recognized the son as Fadil. He looked younger and didn’t have any grey in his beard yet. Kaislyn ran a hand along the back of her neck thoughtfully.
All three halted in their work when she joined them.
“I’m glad you’re better, Immortal Walker,” said Fadil formally.
“So am I. Grehesh, can I talk to you for a moment?”
The old man nodded and they walked to the far end of the shed. The steady thunk of the axe against logs resumed. “What ridiculous scheme do you have in mind now? You have that look about you again,” Grehesh added, forestalling Kaislyn’s indignant reply.
“It’s no more ridiculous than most of my ideas. When Athalia helped me escape Ikaros, he was going to execute me.”
“A painful prospect.”
“Mmm. Usually executions are done by the priests, but for extreme cases it’s beheading. The idea is that the victim doesn’t even deserve to be a final sacrifice.”
“Your city people are bloodthirsty lunatics,” Grehesh muttered.
“Yes, they are, aren’t they?” Kaislyn smiled with all her teeth at Grehesh.
The axe fell behind them, splitting the wood with a loud crack.
Grehesh’s face drained of color beneath his dark, leathery skin. “Gods above, child! Are you insane?”
Kaislyn arched her eyebrows at him. “I refuse to answer that. Well?”
“Well what?” Grehesh shouted at her.
“Da? Everything all right?” Fadil appeared behind the stacks of wood. His face was creased with worry.
“Fine, fine,” ground Grehesh. His son took a step back at the sight of his livid father-in-law. “Go inside and lie down until you’re sensible again.”
“Da—”
“Not you, idiot boy! Her!” He jabbed a finger at Kaislyn.
“I have never been sensible,” Kaislyn retorted. “I don’t intend to start now. I am reasonably confident nothing will go wrong.”
“Wrong? Wrong? Idiot child—”
If Grehesh’s concern for her hadn’t been so evident, Kaislyn would have found the sight of the usually placid shaman yelling at her amusing.
“I do have reason to think this will work,” Kaislyn said. “I’ve gotten frostbite a few times and none of my fingers or toes ever fell off. I’m fairly certain my head won’t either.”
“Your what?” cried Fadil.
“I need you to cut my head off,” said Kaislyn.
The son’s mouth hung open. “Um...why?”
“Now that, Grehesh, is a sensible question,” Kaislyn said to the glaring shaman. “I’m scheduled to be executed, courtesy of Ikaros, and I should like to know what my symptoms will be like afterwards.”
“Oh.” Fadil stared at her.
“You aren’t immortal, Kaislyn.” Grehesh’s voice trembled from the effort not to shout again.
“Of course I am.” Away from her birth life anyway.
“Do you hear yourself, idiot child?” Grehesh swallowed and tried again. “Do you hear yourself, Kaislyn? You can’t know. Not for certain. Taking such a risk is suicidal! For all you know such a decisive death could be the one that does kill you outside your birth life.”
“You’re as dead from getting stabbed as you are dead from starvation. The manner doesn’t matter when the result is the same. My concern is that some deaths hit me immediately and I can barely function. Others hold off for a while. I have to know which this will be, Grehesh. You said yourself I should take care of Ikaros first. I can’t risk being so vulnerable around him again. I need to prepare for every possibility.”
“Even if this does work, you’ll be suffering from the effects for the rest of your life!”
“I have already considered that. You can shout all you like but that won’t change anything. I will just Shift to a safe time and place and rig an axe to fall on my neck.”
The shaman shook his head in slow denial.
“I am going to destroy him this time,” Kaislyn said in a low, harsh voice. “I am going to rip the cities from
his hands and strike his crown from his head.”
“I will do it, Immortal Walker,” said Fadil abruptly.
“Really?”
“If you dare—” Grehesh rounded on his son.
He took a step back. “Look at her, Da. You’ll never convince her otherwise and you can’t physically stop her from doing it. She’s right, too. We—you—ought to be there to help her. But having him actually do it is cruel,” Fadil added to Kaislyn. “I’ll... do it. You’ve never liked me as much as your son-in-laws anyway, Da. Cutting the head off of your favorite grandchild won’t make much of a difference.” He tried to smile at his own joke and failed.
“I am surrounded by stupid children,” Grehesh groaned as Kaislyn led the way to the other side of the shed. “Go inside,” he ordered his waiting grandson. The boy nodded and left, looking back curiously at them.
Kaislyn turned to her volunteer executioner. He suddenly looked sick and his hands shook as he picked up his axe. Kaislyn shoved her own nerves away. This was better than facing Zarif. And it wasn’t going to hurt that much.
Really?
“I’ve never done this,” Fadil said, swallowing loudly in the silence.
“None of us have,” Grehesh point out sarcastically.
Kaislyn knelt on the cold ground beside the stump used for splitting wood. She pressed her forehead against the rough stump.
“Prop your chin up,” Grehesh said suddenly, his voice loud in the tense silence. “It’ll provide a cleaner cut. I think.”
“Right. Thanks.” Kaislyn tilted her head up so her chin was resting on the stump instead of her forehead. She closed her eyes. “Whenever you’re ready,” she said, pleased that her voice didn’t shake.
Who knew one could actually hear an axe whistle through the air?
Girl—
5 | Dethroning a King
Ti-em buzzed with excitement for the upcoming execution. Throngs crowded the streets and the largest square in the city, that in front of the main temple, had been packed since the night before with spectators eager for a good view.
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