True, but I regret not being able to share the amazing world under the waves with our child.
“Let us take one step at a time,” he says. “First we will wait until our baby is out in the world and then we shall see. Whatever happens, we will be all right. We will be happy.”
I lean my forehead against his. “I am happy. Very happy.” I touch my stomach. “I can’t wait until she or he is born. You’re going to be an awesome father.”
“Thank you, my love. You are going to be a magnificent mother.”
“I’ll try.”
***
“Geez, you don’t even look like you’re pregnant,” Leah says as she drops down on a chair next to me in the baby room. Damarian and I have only begun to decorate it. We’ve painted the walls sapphire. Every time I look at them, I’m filled with guilt because Damarian will be forced to put his merman life behind him. I mean, I guess it won’t be completely behind him since his family promised to visit us, and he’ll need to go for a swim once a week, but it’s not the same. I need to push these feelings aside and embrace the life I’m about to have. A baby. Someone Damarian and I created together, out of love. That really is all we need.
“My mom wasn’t huge when she was pregnant, either,” I say.
“I bet I’d be huge,” she says.
“Speaking of which…?” I lift my eyebrows.
She holds up her hand. “Hold your horses. Kyle just got banished a few weeks ago and is learning to adjust once again to life solely on land. I’m keeping my distance so he can adjust.” She bites on her bottom lip. “I just hope he made the right decision.”
The only way for Kyle and Leah to have a future together was for one of them to give up their life. Kyle made the sacrifice. He asked Flora and Kiander to banish him to land so he doesn’t have to be tied to the sea. Leah was against it and begged him not to give up anything for her, but the two have fallen madly in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together.
“Don’t have any regrets,” I tell her. “I’ve watched the two of you struggle to find love. You two were made for each other. I don’t think anyone can understand you like Kyle can, and I doubt any mermaid can understand Kyle the way you can.”
She hugs herself. “I know. I just worry that we won’t last.”
“Leah—”
“I guess there really isn’t any harm. Kyle’s no longer a merman, so he’s not eternally bonded to me. He can always ask Flora and Kiander to lift the banishment and he’ll be able to return to the ocean and mate with whomever.”
I grab a cushion from the nearby chair and gently whack her in the face. “Stop this crazy talk right now. You and Kyle aren’t going to break up.”
She hugs the cushion. “I hope you’re right. So, future mother, what do you think you’re having?”
“No clue. Damarian’s certain it will be a girl. He wants it to be a girl. Last week, he saw a beautiful dollhouse on display at a store window and wanted to buy it. It cost two hundred bucks. There’s no way I’m letting him spend that much money, especially if we’re not sure we’re having a girl.”
“She’ll be one spoiled little princess,” Leah says with a laugh.
“I know. He’s totally going to make me have to be the bad guy.”
“Is he ready, though?” she asks. “Raising kids here on land is nothing like raising them in the ocean. There are so many dangers out here…”
“I know. We’re trying to take one step at a time. Let me just get past the pregnancy and birth.”
Leah leans back on the chair and shakes her head in disbelief.
“What?” I ask.
“I just can’t believe how our lives turned out. You’re mated to a freakin’ merman and are going to have a baby. I’m with a banished merman…” She shakes her head again. “It really does feel like we’re in a fairytale.”
“Is that fairytail with a t-a-i-l?” I ask.
She giggles. “Definitely.”
Her phone beeps. She digs it out of her back pocket and scans the screen. “Great, a reminder that I need to fill out my college applications. I really need to stop pushing it off…”
“Do you still want to apply to law school?” I ask.
“That’s the plan, though I highly doubt I’d get in. Kyle thinks I can.”
“Well, he’s right. I think you can, too.”
“Thanks.” She still looks doubtful.
“And have you and Kyle discussed moving out to California? I mean, now that you guys are together and seem really happy, there’s no point of running away there, right?”
“Aww, you’re going to miss me.”
I grab her cushion and gently whack her in the face again. “Of course I’d miss you!”
She shields her face. “Okay, stop assaulting me! True I’m happy with Kyle, but living here still reminds me of everything I’ve been through. Maybe the only way to start fresh with Kyle is to move out there.”
I don’t say anything, though my heart stings a little. Now that Damarian and I won’t be able to return to the ocean, I’ll need all the support I can get. But I can’t be selfish. Leah needs to do what’s best for her.
“But,” she continues, “these reminders don’t make me sad anymore. It’s like…I’m a better person because of what I’ve been through. Stronger. If I stay here, I’ll always be reminded of that. Plus,” she says with a grin. “There’s no way I’m not going to be part of your kid’s life.”
I sigh in relief. “You have no idea how happy that makes me feel!” I put my arms around her and yank her in for a strong hug. When I pull away, a wave of dizziness takes over.
“Whoa, Cassie.” Leah grabs my arm before I fall of my chair. “Are you okay?”
I touch my forehead. “I just got dizzy.” When I lift my eyes to hers, her face holds nothing but concern.
She jumps to her feet. “I’ll get you some water.” She dashes out of the room and returns so fast it’s like she has teleportation powers.
“Thanks.” I gulp it down, not realizing how thirsty I am.
But a few seconds later, nausea whirls around in my stomach.
“Cassie?” Leah asks, appearing even more concerned.
“I think…I might throw up the water.”
She reaches for my arm. “I’ll help you to the bathroom.”
“Too dizzy to move.” I touch my forehead again.
Leah once again dashes out of the room and returns with the mop bucket. I bend over to vomit, but I only dry heave.
Leah rubs my back. “Is nausea normal at this stage of pregnancy? What’s your doctor’s number?”
“It’s on the fridge—” I cry out when I feel a sharp pain in my abdomen.
“Cassie!?” Her voice is beyond frantic. “I’m calling your doctor right now. Or should I call for an ambulance?”
“Wait.” I grab her hand as my other one goes to my stomach. “It’s not…you can’t call my doctor or an ambulance. You need to call Damarian.”
“Why?”
“Because I sense a merbaby inside me.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
The door bursts open and Damarian and Kyle rush into the baby room.
“Quick, help me get her to the tub!” Leah nearly shrieks, catching me before I fall over again. I cry out when I feel another sharp pain in my stomach.
“She requires water?” Damarian gathers me in his arms.
“Water,” I moan. “Please…water…”
“Yes, my love. It is all right. Your body must require to shift into a child of the sea.”
I’m in a half-sleeping state when Damarian hurries toward the bathroom. I see doors and the floor. This feels exactly like when I shifted into a mermaid for the first time.
“The baby…” I croak. “Merbaby…”
He pauses outside the bathroom door. “The fry? You believe she’s…” His hand goes to my stomach and his eyes widen.
I groan as another wave of pain takes over my stomach. That knocks Damarian out of h
is frozen state, and he quickly and carefully lowers me into the tub. “Please, Kyle,” he calls over his shoulder. “Can you get the synthetic sea salt from the hall closet?”
He nods and dashes away.
“What’s going on?” Leah asks from outside the bathroom. “Do you also sense the baby is a child of the sea?”
Damarian turns on the water. “It does not make sense. I have touched Cassie’s stomach many times and have felt the fry. I did not sense a child of the sea.”
The only thing on my mind is the baby. Is she or he okay? I hope nothing will happen to him or her during my transformation.
Kyle returns with the sea salt. He peels of the lid, and together with Damarian, they tip the bucket over the tub, letting the salt drop into the water. We’ve kept buckets of sea salt in our closet for moments like this. Every organ in my body yearns for the sea water, needs the sea water. I know that if I don’t change, I won’t make it.
I don’t need to make myself change. It happens as soon as the water is filled with salt. I try not to flail or writhe in agony. I force my body to remain completely still, because I don’t want to do any damage to my unborn child. Thirty seconds feel like thirty minutes. But eventually it does stop, leaving me weaker than I’ve ever felt before.
“Cassie?” Damarian asks.
I slowly open my eyes and find his face panicked. My eyes dip to my sapphire tail. It feels like forever since I’ve seen it. “I’m…okay.” My eyes move from Damarian to an equally panicked Leah and Kyle. “I’m okay.” My hand rests on my stomach. “The baby feels okay, too. But, Damarian…”
He cups my cheek. “Yes, I sense she is a child of the sea as well.”
“So…” I swallow. “Our baby isn’t human after all. She or he will be a merperson.”
The room becomes silent. Leah and Kyle exchange glances, not knowing what to say or do.
“I do not understand,” Damarian says after a short while. “When I felt her earlier today, I did not sense a child of the sea. I am very concerned, Cassie. We should travel to the sea and speak with my parents. We have not seen them since we discovered you were to have the fry. Perhaps they will tell us what is occurring.”
“Okay. Just help me out of here.”
He stares at my tail, an anxious expression on his face.
“I can’t go to the ocean like this, Damarian.”
“But if the fry is indeed a child of the sea…”
“What am I supposed to do? Remain here until the baby’s born?”
He shakes his head. “Of course not, my love. It will be all right.”
Damarian sweeps me into his arms and gently lowers me to the ground. I wrap a towel around my waist. Closing my eyes, I tell my body to shift back into a human. Like before, I try to remain as still as possible. When I open my eyes, I find three pairs of worried eyes staring at me.
I hug my stomach, like I’m protecting my baby from all harm.
“Do you feel ill now that you are out of sea water?” Damarian asks.
“I feel fine.”
“Nonetheless, I wish to speak to my parents.”
We don’t have time to pack a bag of essentials. Leah and Kyle walk us to the beach, asking us over and over if they can do anything to help. By the time we get there, a headache is starting to form and I feel thirsty. I don’t tell Damarian, though, because he’s wasted enough nerves. But I can’t hide anything from him. He tightens his hold on my hand and quickens his pace a bit, stopping by the large rocks.
“Are you all right?” he asks.
“I’m fine. Let’s just get inside.”
Leah wraps her arms around me. “Feel better. I won’t stop worrying over you.”
Kyle hugs me next while Leah hugs Damarian. “Same here.” Then he claps Damarian on the back. “Take care of Cassie and your baby.”
He inclines his head. “With every fiber in my being.”
Kyle and Leah turn away as we strip out of our clothes and enter the ocean. This time, the change doesn’t happen automatically. When Damarian and I are in our merpeople forms, he gathers me to his chest and searches my face. “How do you feel?”
“Much better.”
He lays his hand on my stomach. “I fear something might be going on with our fry. I will not rest easy until I speak to my parents. Do you think you can travel in such conditions?”
“No different than any other pregnant mermaid, I guess.”
“They swim normally, yes, but at a much slower pace, and they rest a lot when they are close to giving birth.”
I take his hand. “Let’s go.”
We wave goodbye to Leah and Kyle then go under. Damarian travels at a slow pace for my sake, but that’s not really necessary. Still, I don’t want to cause any strain on the baby, so I don’t ask him to speed up. It takes forever when we finally reach the entrance to the merpeople colony.
Fiske bolts over to us. I sensed something was amiss. Are you all right, Damarian and Cassie?
We hope so, Damarian tells him. I must speak with my parents.
Please inform me if you need my help.
We thank him and swim to the Sapphire colony. The place is basically deserted, since it’s in the middle of the night. But when we get to Damarian’s family’s cave, we find Syren waiting outside.
“Father?” Damarian asks as we swim up to him. “What are you doing awake?”
“Mother and I have sensed you and Cassie in the sea. I thought you stated that Cassie would not enter the water. What has happened?” he asks as we enter the cave.
Kiandra is pacing around. As soon as she sees us, she dashes over and wraps her tail around me and Damarian. “Is everything all right?”
“We are not certain.” Damarian brings his eyes to me.
“Please touch my stomach,” I say. “What do you feel?”
Kiandra’s eyes dip to my stomach. She gently lays a hand on it. A second later, her eyes widen. “You carry a child of the sea.”
Syren does the same and his face also fills with shock. “I do not understand. You stated you were carrying a human fry.”
“That’s what we thought,” I say. “And we saw a human baby on the ultrasounds. I have the photos as proof.”
Syren rubs his chin. “Perhaps it has been a child of the sea all along but has only begun to develop a tail.”
I guess that would make sense, but I’m pretty sure I saw the baby’s legs numerous times.
Kiandra touches my face. “You appear exhausted, Cassie. Please rest. We shall speak more of this in the morning.”
She’s right, I’m way beyond exhausted. I thank her and Syren, and Damarian and I leave to his room. He helps me settle down in the oyster shell and holds me close in his arms. “Fret not, Cassie. All will be well.”
“I guess we’ll have to live in the sea for the rest of our lives and not land,” I say.
He looks into my eyes. “Does that upset you?”
I shake my head. “Of course not. I will always push my child over myself. I will do anything and everything to make sure she or he is happy and healthy and safe. It just sucks that she or he will never know my family.”
The merpeople can always come to land, but it’s impossible for humans to survive in the deep ocean.
“I apologize, my love. Truly, I am sorry.”
I put my finger over his lips. “Don’t be. I’m ready to sacrifice everything for our child. And living in the ocean has its perks. We don’t have to worry about money and all that other stuff humans have to deal with. I think we’ll have a really great life here. I’ll just need to travel to land twice a month or so. And maybe when she or he is old enough, we’ll take them to land so they could meet my family.”
Damarian nods. “That does not sound like a terrible future.”
I kiss him. “Not terrible at all.”
I have no idea how long I sleep, but it seems long enough. Damarian and I are woken up by Zarya, who is zooming around the room.
“You have returned! Fathe
r and Mother informed me that you would raise your fry on land because she will be human, but now they have informed me that the fry will be a child of the sea! How exciting.”
Damarian laughs and pulls her arm to slow her down. “You carry too much enthusiasm this early in the morning.”
“I will be the best aunt to her, I promise!”
“We know you will be, for you are fine aunt to Dorin, Kyteria, and Saelia. Am I not correct, Cassie?”
I’m moaning under my breath, rolling back and forth in the shell.
“She does not seem well. Shall I fetch Mother?” Zarya asks, her voice holding the same unease as Damarian.
“One moment.” He cups my cheek. “Cassie?”
“I…I can’t explain how I feel…I…” My eyes stare up at the ceiling. “I need to get out of the ocean.”
“Pardon?”
My body forces me to a sitting position. “I can’t be in the ocean, Damarian. I need to get to land.”
His eyebrows crease in confusion, but he shakes his head and nods. “Yes. Right away.” He gathers me in his arms. “Please inform Father and Mother that I am taking Cassie to the surface,” he calls to Zarya as he swims swiftly out of the room. We pass the twins, Ryter, and Kiandra and Syren on the way to the exit. They all stare after us with bewilderment and concern.
“I can’t be here,” I keep muttering under my breath. “Please. Get me out of here.”
He brushes his lips against my cheek. “I am swimming as fast as I can. I will bring you to the closest sandbar, my love. Please hang in there.”
I don’t know if I can. When I glance down at the lower half of my body, I see my tail still there. Every part of me is still mermaid, not a hint of my human side taking over. Why do I desperately need to get to land if I’m not changing into a human?
Now my breathing has gotten laborious. When I touch my neck, I see my gills are still there. How can I be losing oxygen when my gills are still intact?
“Cassie?” he nearly shouts when I gasp for air. “Cassie! There is no air here. You have your gills. Use them!”
I am, can feel my gills expanding and contracting, but my lungs aren’t getting the oxygen I need.
“We are almost at the surface,” Damarian says, pumping his tail. “Breathe in air the moment we reach it.”
Merman's Forever (Merman's Kiss, Book 6) Page 18