by Holly Jaymes
I finished the dishes and then poured another glass of wine. I poured one for her as well. I considered going out to the hot tub and inviting her in with me, but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to manage my lust if I saw her in a swimsuit.
I brought the wine into the living area where I found her sitting on the couch with her legs tucked under her looking out the window. There was no real view there, so I wasn’t sure what she was gazing at.
“Everything okay with your folks?” I asked.
She sighed. “Yes. Mom cried about the house. You know, because all of those memories are gone now. Dad worried about the money, of course, even though the house was insured.”
I handed her the wine. “Another glass?”
“Thank you.” She took a sip. “They want me to go look at it and send them some pictures.”
“We might be able to get back in tomorrow. I’ll take you.”
She gave me an appreciative smile. “You don’t have to look after me. I don’t want to get in the way of your life.”
“What life? I work and help with fire and rescue.”
“You always were a bit of a homebody, weren’t you?”
I nodded. “I like peace and quiet. No drama.”
“Says the man who was spraying me with water.”
I grinned. “I can still be playful.”
We maintained our distance as we chatted, me in the chair and her on the couch. By the time I finished my wine, I was having visions of getting her naked on the sofa, so I decided that perhaps it was time to go to bed.
“I have an early conference call tomorrow. Do you need anything before I hit the sack?” I stood.
“No. Thank you, Mason. You’re being very kind and generous.”
“Just helping a friend.”
A quick flash of something crossed her face. Was it disappointment? Sadness? I wasn’t sure.
At four the next morning, I was up and talking with a trainer in London. With the popularity of mindfulness and meditation, I thought it would be good to have a series of videos teaching people the techniques. Although my focus was on physical fitness, I figured these techniques were fitness for the mind. That was important, too, right?
I finished the call at five-thirty and decided to get my exercise in then, so I’d have the day to help Willa deal with her parents’ house. Maybe she’d even be interested in taking a hike up to the waterfall.
I entered the kitchen after my workout at seven to find Willa at the kitchen table with her laptop.
“Did you sleep alright?” I asked, heading to the coffee pot. She’d already brewed coffee.
“I did, thank you.”
“I’m going to make breakfast, a veggie omelet. Want one?”
“Sure. That sounds good.”
I got to work while she tapped away at her computer. It felt very homey and domestic. It was something I could get used to, which worried me. Getting used to Willa being around wasn’t something I should do.
As the eggs began to cook, I poured another cup of coffee and brought the pot to fill her cup. “What are you working on?”
“I’m applying to a couple of feature writing jobs in New York.”
“New York? You are a city girl these days.” It was another reason not to indulge in this crazy lust I had for her.
She shrugged. “The city is where big media companies that hire writers are.”
I hired writers to create articles that would help promote my business, but Willa’s background was more in news writing. The big cities probably had more opportunities.
“When you’re done, I can take you to the house if you want,” I said.
“I hate to ask you to do that. I have a car.”
“I don’t mind. Besides, you might want a friend with you, Willa. It’s not easy to see.”
“Is it interrupting your day?”
“Not at all. I got work done this morning.” I finished the eggs and set them on plates along with toast. I gave her one and sat across from her with the other.
“If it doesn’t disrupt your day. I can call someone else if it does.”
The last thing I wanted was for her to call Wyatt. “It’s fine. I want to.”
She cut into her omelet. “Then, yes, I’d like that.” She took a bite and moaned in a way that had my dick responding. “Wow, this is really good.”
Jesus, I was in trouble if watching her eat was going to give me an orgasm.
Later that morning, I helped her into my SUV. I also tossed a backpack with water and food on the off chance she’d be interested in a hike in the hills south of town where we used to go as kids.
Fifteen minutes later, I was turning onto the road that took us up toward Haynesville Ridge.
“It looks like a war zone or something,” Willa’s soft voice said as she looked out the window up the hill. “You were walking around in that?”
“I was over on the west side,” I pointed out the window. “Usually, our goal is to contain a fire to an area, but when the wind pushed it over here, our goal was to save the homes. We failed.”
“I can’t imagine what that’s like.”
“I suspect it’s close to what hell is like, darkness and fire. It’s fucking hot.”
She reached over and put her hand on mine. “That’s so brave.” She studied me for a moment. “As a SEAL, you probably had to do many brave things.”
I shrugged, mostly to shirk off the memories of some of the brave things I had to do. Instead of replying, I pointed to the street ahead. “This is your street.”
She looked out the window again. “How can you be sure? The street sign is gone. Nearly all the homes are dust.”
“Fourth road up.” I turned and headed to the end of the street. Her home had sat on the largest lot at the end of a cul-de-sac. I parked in the road and put my hand on her seat as I looked out her side of the window. “This is it.”
She didn’t say anything as she pulled the handle to open the door. I hurried out my door and around the SUV to her side.
“It’s…God…” Her voice cracked, and I understood the emotion that came with seeing your house in ruins.
I rubbed my hand up and down her back. “I’m sorry, Willa.”
She sniffed as she made her way along what had been the driveway.
“Be careful,” I warned. “There’s a lot of debris.”
The nod of her head was her only an acknowledgment. I followed her to where the remnants of the foundation peeked through the mud. I stayed outside the perimeter while she stepped in and scanned the location that once held her childhood home.
“This was the kitchen, remember?”
“I’ve never been to your house,” I said. It was so odd to have been such good friends with her but to have never been to her home.
“Oh. Right.” She gave me a wan smile. “I remember thinking how weird it was to be in your home for the first time. I guess that’s how it is for you.”
She wandered around a little more until she came to the corner where I’d found the charm. “This was my bedroom.”
I nodded.
“There’s nothing left. Not that I had much here. I left home with everything I’d wanted.”
I tried not to be hurt by the fact that she hadn’t wanted the charm. She could have tossed it away, so I supposed it was something that she’d kept.
She pulled out her cell phone and began taking pictures. “Do you think people will rebuild?”
“I don’t know. If the fire damaged underground lines, it might be some time before that’s possible.”
“We were never going to come back. I keep telling myself that, and yet this is still really sad.” She came toward me, and I held out my hand to help her over the gap by the foundation.
Then I put my arms around her. “I’m sorry, Willa.”
She rested her head against my chest. “I’m glad you were with me. I don’t know that I could have done this with anyone else.”
I wanted to ask her if she could have come wit
h Wyatt, but that was just asking for trouble. I didn’t want to know, and just thinking it made me feel like an insecure pussy.
She looked to the west and then the east, and I was sure she was noticing the two homes that were still standing not so far from her parents’ house. Then she looked out further down the ridge, where more homes stood on the opposite side of the firebreak.
“So strange. They look untouched.”
I nodded.
“The luck of the draw, I guess.”
Wanting to cheer her up, if possible, I said, “What do you say we go south and take a hike to the waterfall? I brought some water and food. We can have a picnic.”
“I don’t know.”
I tilted her chin up to look at me. “You used to like it there when you had things on your mind.”
Her lips twitched up. “You remember.”
If she only knew. I remembered everything when it came to her. “Come on.”
Thirty minutes later, we’d driven through town and to the south side of the valley, then headed up the southern mountain. I reached the pullout where I parked and grabbed the backpack.
She inhaled a breath. “Still smoky but not as bad as before.”
I led the way to the trail that wove through the trees. I’d stop on occasion when there was a view of the valley. Normally there was a lovely view of the lake, meadow and the mountains on the north side of them, but now there was smoke and a blackened hillside.
We finally reached the waterfall, and being careful of our step, went off trail to the secret place we’d found when we were about eleven.
“Do you think anyone else ever comes to this spot?” she asked as she sat on the towel I brought.
“I’ve never seen any sign of it. I’ve never told anyone about it.”
“Not even Tara?” She gave me a smug smile.
“Not even Tara.” This was our place. I kept that tidbit to myself.
I handed her a water bottle, and we sat in the quiet with the view of the waterfall. So many times we’d been here, sitting in the quiet. She was the only person I’d ever been around that had been okay with silence.
I took a drink of water, then I lay back, soaking in the sun and air.
“I don’t feel like the same person,” she said.
I opened my eyes to look at her, wondering what she was talking about.
“When we used to come up here, we had plans. Or I did. I’m not living that life. That girl feels like a different person.” She turned to me. “What about you?”
“I’m not doing what I planned, but I don’t feel like a different person. Are you unhappy with who you are now?”
“I wouldn’t say unhappy. My life is…unsettled.”
“Perhaps you should look at that as an opportunity. You’re not tied to anything, which means you can choose your path.”
She smiled. “Are you a motivational speaker now?”
“No. But when I left the military, I remember feeling unsettled. The plans I’d made were abruptly ended. It took some time and trial and error, but eventually, I found my way. I’m very content now, so while the journey was long, hard, and uncertain, I’m happy with where I’ve ended up.”
“You’re back in the house you grew up in.”
I wondered if she saw that as a negative. Like it was some sort of psychological baggage that had me in the past. I didn’t see it like that.
“It’s my house now. Also, the town is different now.”
“You mean, with my family gone.”
I couldn’t decide if there was bitterness in her tone. “Your family was prominent in the town. It had a lot of influence, and so yes, with them gone, it’s different. I didn’t say better or worse. It’s just different.”
“It's probably better.” She looked down at me. “I’m sorry for blaming you for what happened.”
I’d waited ten years for that, and yet, it didn’t’ give me the satisfaction I’d hoped for, not when she looked so lost and forlorn.
“Thank you. I had nothing to do with it, but my dad did take a certain amount of joy in knowing he was preventing your father from saving his fortune by not selling his shares of the original claim.”
“He deserved it, though, didn’t he?”
I sat up and draped my arm around her. “Maybe things turned out for the best. They’ve all moved out of Eden Lake and forged new lives. We don’t have to live under their immature feud anymore.”
She turned her head, and it put her lips so close to mine. Her scent, sweet, wildflowers, filled my senses.
“You’re right.” Her gaze drifted down to my lips, and I wondered if she wanted me to kiss her or if I was projecting my own desire on her.
She leaned in, pressed her lips to mine, sending a wave of bliss through me. Before I could really catch up with what was happening, she pulled away.
Then she lay back. I lay back next to her, wondering what was going through her mind. Was it the same as what was going through mine? It occurred to me that perhaps I should come clean about my feelings. I knew she wasn’t planning on staying, so confessing that I had more than friendly feelings was a fool’s errand, but I currently lived with the regret that I hadn’t told her ten years ago. Maybe that wouldn’t have changed anything back then, but at least I wouldn’t be living with the wonder about what would have happened if I’d told her. If I told her now, at least she’d know.
I turned to look at her. Her eyes were closed, and her facial features were relaxed. I studied her beauty. Her blonde hair sparkled in the sun. She had a smattering of freckles over her nose. I gazed at the pink of her lips. She was a lovely woman who deserved to be happy. I hated that her life now wasn’t fulfilling to her. I probably wasn’t the answer to her woes, but I could give her little happiness, maybe even some romance. That’s what I’d do.
Tomorrow was the reunion. Instead of just taking her there, I’d make it a date. I’d woo her and tell her how wonderful I thought she was.
My heart thundered in my chest as the excitement and terror of confessing the truth warred in it. This time tomorrow, I’d either feel like a lucky man or a fool.
Chapter 7: Finally Seen
Willa
Seeing my childhood home reduced to a pile of ash was harder than I thought it would be. I hadn’t been home for ten years, and still, emotion clogged my throat as I stood in the place that had once been my bedroom. I had my memories, but it still felt like a part of them was destroyed.
Mason was so sweet and patient with me as I took in the place I’d grown up. Then he took me to the waterfall. At first, I didn’t want to go, but he convinced me that it would be a place of calm and reflection. He was right. With him by my side, I was reminded that I had what was important. I still had my family, my life, and my friends. Even when he was young, thin, and wiry, Mason had a quiet strength about him. I still felt it now as we sat and looked at the water.
I’d been gone ten years without Mason in my life. Now I’d been back two days, and Mason was as much a part of my life now as he had been growing up. On the one hand, it seemed strange that I could so quickly reconnect to him, and at the same time, it felt so natural.
As he sat next to me, and I wanted to wrap myself in him. When he looked at me, I wanted to kiss him. So, I did. I just couldn't help it. It was short and could easily have been construed as a friendly kiss. But in truth, I did it because I loved him. At that moment, it wasn’t attraction or lust driving me, but emotion. It was gratitude and contentment.
That evening, we cooked dinner together. Mason made chicken on the grill while I made a fruit salad. It made me remember when we were best friends so many years ago. I used to think that we’d eventually end up together like this. I vowed to enjoy it while I could. Once I had the house dealt with, I’d be moving on. I wondered if we’d stay close once I left. I also wondered what would happen if I seduced him. One night of friends with benefits. Would that be weird afterward?
The next day was the high school reunion, and I made
a commitment to myself to focus on enjoying myself.
Mason was up early again and spent the latter part of the morning running errands. I worked, submitting queries for articles, and applying to a few more jobs. Late in the afternoon, I found him working in his office.
“I’m going to take a shower and get ready for tonight,” I told him.
He looked up from whatever he was doing on the computer. “I’ll shower and get ready after you.”
I leaned against the door jam. Mason had never been a person to like parties or large group functions. It was a surprise he’d agreed to take me.
“You know, you don’t have to go to this if you don’t want to. I can find someone else to hang out with.”
“You mean, Wyatt?”
I shrugged. “Sure.” Or someone else.
His jaw tightened. “If you’d rather—”
“It’s not what I’d rather, it’s what you’d rather, Mason. I know you don’t like stuff like this.”
“I’ll go with you.” His voice was clipped.
I held my hands up in surrender. “Okay. But don’t complain if you get bored or antsy.”
“I won’t,” he grumbled as he turned back to his computer.
With a laugh, I headed up the hall to the guest room to get my things for the shower. It took me some time to figure out what to wear. The evening wasn’t formal, but I didn’t want to be too casual, either. I opted for a green short-sleeved V-neck dress that had a vintage vibe to it. The color highlighted the green in my hazel eyes, the A-line accentuated my waist and hips, and the V-neck dipping between my breasts was alluring without being sexy.
I pulled my hair into a loose twist letting a few strands curl around my face. I didn’t usually wear much makeup. This time I added eyeliner to my usual blush, light shadow, and mascara. My goal was to look pretty without looking like I tried too hard. I stood back from the mirror to assess my efforts and felt like I’d achieved my goal.
When I finished, I grabbed a sweater and a clutch from my room and went to the living room. On the coffee table, there was a bottle of wine and two glasses with a note.