by Holly Jaymes
“Hello?”
“Hey, Emma, it’s Charlie,” the voice said. Charlie was another high-schooler like Janell who worked at Paradise Java.
“Hi Charlie, what’s up?” I had a sneaky suspicion that I knew what was up. Charlie only ever called if he needed someone to work for him.
“Ah…yeah so me and a few friends went to Vegas last night. We’re still here.”
Las Vegas was three hours from Eden Lake. I looked at my watch, noting Charlie should already be at work.
“Anyway, I can’t make it to work and I was hoping you could cover for me.”
“When will you be back?” If he left now, he’d be back before lunch and I could still have most of my day.
“I was hoping you’d do the whole shift.”
“Charlie, why didn’t you get coverage before you left?” And how was he having any fun since he was still in high school? I wondered if he had a fake ID.
“Yeah, I know. I thought I’d be back.”
I blew out a breath. Figuring I could use the extra money toward my dream fund, I agreed to work his shift.
I closed up my computer, took a shower, and then headed into town. I parked in the farthest spot, as required by our boss, and walked into the busy café. I made my way around the line to the counter.
“Oh, thank God,” Janell breathed a sigh of relief when she saw me.
I smiled. “I’m here to save you. Want me to take the register for a bit? Give you a breather?”
“You’re a God send.” Poor Janell looked haggard.
“Actually, Charlie sent me. He’s in Vegas.”
“He’s not old enough to be in Vegas,” she said with disgust.
I put on an apron and then turned with a smile to the first customer in line.
“By the way, Tucker is here. He’s been MIA a lot, but I guess he’s been training,” Janell said.
I scanned the room and saw him in the corner with a woman. Immediately, jealousy flared, but I worked to tamp it down. There had to be a perfectly good reason for him to have coffee with a woman. Maybe it was Willa or Allie. A quick glance informed me that Tucker wasn’t with anyone I knew.
“I’d like two dark coffees and a mocha,” the woman at the counter ordered.
I pulled out the to-go cups and marked each order on them, all the while keeping an eye on Tucker and the woman. She was pretty, although a little bit older than him. She had to be mid-thirties at least, maybe even forty.
I handed the mocha order to Janell while I rang up the order, and then filled the two dark coffees. As I handed the cups to the customer, I noticed the woman, putting her hand on Tucker’s shoulder. They were sitting close, and appeared to be very familiar. Her hand slid down, caressing his bicep. Then she leaned over, giving him a little shoulder bump. His back was to me so I couldn’t see his face, but hers appeared quite content.
The next customer stepped up to the counter. “Green smoothie,” she ordered.
I rang up the order and then went to make the smoothie. When I handed it to her, I glanced again at Tucker. His arm was on the back of the woman’s chair. She’d turned her head and laughed, while he was grinning at her. The niggle of jealousy turned to anger. How had I been so stupid to think he was in to me and me alone? In fact, not only was he not just with me, but he’d lied about that no-woman rule. Clearly, he didn’t need to keep me a secret if he was out and about with this woman. No, I was a secret because I was a second woman. God, was this his girlfriend or something? I felt sick at the idea that I was helping him cheat.
“I’d like a mocha and a latte with skim milk,” the next customer ordered.
Swallowing my anger, I forced a smile, and took the order. Two orders later, the customer asked for a blueberry muffin, but there weren’t any in the case.
“There’s more in back,” Janell said as she steamed milk for a cappuccino. “I didn’t have time to refill when I ran out earlier.”
I checked the case for other baked goods we were running low on and then went back into the kitchen to refill them. When I returned, I put them in the case and gave the woman her muffin and coffee. As the next person stepped up to the counter, I noticed Tucker opening the door to the café for the woman, his arm on her lower back as she stepped outside.
“Emma?”
It took me a minute to realize Janell was talking to me. “Hmm?”
She looked at the customer to me. “Are you alright?”
Realizing I was distracted, I gave my head a shake and re-focused on the customer in front of me. “Yes, sorry. What can I get for you?”
The weight of Tucker’s deception weighed on me for the rest of the day. I was able to complete the shift. When I got home, I fulfilled my Etsy orders, but the anger and hurt hung over me like a heavy coat. Even painting couldn’t bring me out of my funk, which was clear in all the dark colors I ended up using.
I’d expected that I wouldn’t see Tucker tonight, or ever again, once I gave him an earful, so I was surprised when I heard his SUV pull up and park outside my place. It was nearly eight o’clock at night and I was curled up with a book having wine when he arrived.
I opened the door to him but blocked his entrance. He was astute enough to know something was up.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“You tell me.”
He put his hands on his hips and shook his head. “What is it about women that you not only get mad at a man for some infraction, but then you pile on the accusations and anger by forcing him to guess what’s wrong? I’m not a mind reader, Emma. If you’ve got a problem, you tell me.”
“No, no, no, Tucker McLean, you’re not going to make me look like the unreasonable one here. The fact that you don’t know what’s wrong is a sign that you’re a liar and exactly the type of man I suspected you were. Having been there and done that before, I’m not doing it again.”
His eyes narrowed as he studied me. “So that’s it? You’re going to relegate me back to being an asshole douchebag without telling me why or giving me a chance to explain?”
I laughed derisively. “There’s no explaining.”
He stared at me, and there was something in his eyes, hurt maybe, that put a niggle of doubt in me.
“Alright. You don’t want me to defend myself against some perceived infraction. But I want an explanation for your behavior. Then I’ll leave. You won’t have to ever look at me again.”
“I just told you. You’re a liar and a cheat.”
His brows furrowed like I was speaking Greek.
“Don’t deny it, Tucker,” I said, even as that niggle started to grow.
“I can’t deny what I don’t know,” he said. He turned his head away like he was gathering his thoughts. He turned back. “I really thought you knew me.”
“Yeah, I thought so too. But it’s all a scam, isn’t it? You have all your rules, so you look squeaky clean but you’re not.”
“I’ve never purported to be a saint, Emma. But I’m not a liar or a cheater. I’m also not judgmental or histrionic.”
“Histrionic!” My voice pitched up sharply, and I realized I was proving his point. “You don’t think I have a right to be angry?”
“Well, since you won’t tell me why you’re angry, no. Maybe if you enlighten me, I could explain or apologize—”
I scoffed. “You’re nice looking and good in bed, Tucker, but no amount of apologizing will excuse this.”
“Well, I guess that answers that then.” His tone was angry, but his eyes still held pain or disappointment, and I didn’t like how it made me feel. “Good luck with your upcoming retreat,” he said, turning away.
I should have been glad he was leaving. Instead, I felt panic. What if I was wrong? What if I was being a jerk by not talking to him? I tried to push those thoughts away because I knew the type of man he was. I’d seen him with my own eyes.
“I was working today,” I blurted out as he reached his SUV.
He stopped and looked at me over the hood of the vehicle. “So?”
I gaped at him. “So, I saw you with your girlfriend.”
His head jerked back and his expression morphed into confusion.
“The one that had her hands all over you and you had your hands on her. Heads together. Laughing. You looked quite cozy, although she seems older than your usual type.” The minute I disparaged her, I felt bad. It wasn’t her fault Tucker was a cheat.
He laughed, making me feel silly and small. I huffed out a breath and started into the house.
“She’s my agent,” he said.
I stopped and turned to him. He’d opened the door to his SUV. “Thanks for the vote of confidence,” he said as he got in.
Oh hell. I re-examined my memory of what I saw. Would an agent and player be that familiar? God, I didn’t know. I watched him in his SUV, a part of me wanting him to leave, and yet, another part of me was desperate to make him stay. Maybe we needed to talk this out because if I was wrong, I didn’t want to lose what we had.
But, what did we really have? I knew when it started it would be a short-term fling. I was well aware that eventually he’d go back to Los Angeles and to his old life of parties and women. Maybe now was a good time to end this because, clearly, my emotions were too involved.
He sat in his SUV looking at me. He didn’t start the vehicle. He didn’t drive off. He just sat with that expression that made me feel like a jerk. Then, with a shake of his head, he started the SUV and pulled away from my house. Dust kicked up as he drove off.
Well, that was that, I thought. Too bad for me that now he was gone, I wished I’d let him stay and explain.
Chapter 15: Taking a Chance
Tucker
She is un-fucking-believable. That’s all I could think as I watched and waited for her to change her mind and ask me to stay so we could talk this out. But she didn’t stop me. Not when I walked away. Not when I got into my SUV.
Here I was, imagining having a real relationship with her once I was allowed off my leash, and she was accusing me of cheating on her. That really galled me. I was so sure she saw me for who I was now and not the playboy image I’d been to her before. Wrong!
Not only did she call me a liar and a cheat, but she also refused to hear my explanation. She had some nerve. She’d called me out several times since I’d met her, but wasn’t I allowed to call her out? Apparently not.
I hit the brakes before I reached the main road, pissed off that I hadn’t stood my ground. Sure, this thing between us was over, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t give her a piece of my mind.
I made a U-turn and headed back to her house. I stalked out of the car and pounded on her door.
“Tucker—”
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to stay. But you will hear me out. Lauren is my agent. I’m not fucking her, I’ve never fucked her, and I never will fuck her. I don’t understand how you could have gotten my meeting with her so wrong. First, you know I’m not supposed to be seeing women, so why would I be out with one unless it was business? And two, if I was cheating, do you really think I’d take her to the place you work? You really think I’m stupid, don’t you?”
“No—”
“I don’t know what pisses me off more - that you think I’m a liar and cheat or that I’m a fucking idiot. I’ve never lied or cheated with you or any woman. Although I just might be stupid because I really thought you respected me. Wrong.” Having had my say, I turned to leave.
“Tucker,” she called after me.
I didn’t turn around. “No, no, I don’t want your explanations.” I tossed her own behavior back at her.
“I’m sorry.”
I willed my feet to keep walking, but my heart made them stop. It took me a moment to turn around. Finally, I did.
“I’m sorry,” she said again. “I should have let you explain.”
I stalked back to her. “No. You should have trusted me.”
“You’re right. I should have asked you about her.” She looked down, and I didn’t like feeling bad for yelling at her. She looked to me again. “I didn’t like how chummy you two looked.”
I rolled my eyes. “Lauren is not my friend. She busts my balls. She was here checking up on me and letting me know about a possible endorsement, both of which I was going to tell you about before you broke off with me.”
She flinched at the words broke off.
Taking a chance, I said, “Unless, you didn’t break off with me. In which case, you can invite me in, we can talk, and maybe have make up sex?”
Her lips twitched up slightly as she opened her door. “Come in.”
It was glorious and terrifying at how much my heart leapt at her invite. I’d just had a sneak peek at what it would feel like to love and lose someone. Did I really want to keep moving forward knowing she could squash my heart like a bug? I realized that her attack on me was because she thought I’d hurt her. Which meant she had to have some sort of feelings for me, right?
Deciding to take the risk, I stepped inside her place.
“I was having wine,” she said. “Since you’re not drinking, I can offer you juice or water.”
“Water,” I said.
She went to the kitchen, as I walked over to look out her sliding door over the lake. She really did have a fantastic spot. If the Minors were motivated by money, they could make a killing selling the resort.
“It’s nice out tonight. Do you want to sit outside?” she asked, handing me the water.
“Yes, but first…” I hooked my arm around her waist and pulled her to me. “Can I kiss you so I can feel like you like me again?”
“I was hoping you would. Because I do like you. Even when I was mad, I liked you.”
Some of the tightness in my chest released. “Good.” I pressed my lips to hers, trying to keep it thorough and firm, without letting my pent-up anger and frustration filter through. At least, that’s what I told myself the cloying agitation was coursing through my blood was. It was actually more likely a desperation to make her mine again. God, if she knew that she’d probably call me a misogynistic caveman.
I pulled away, feeling better, yet not quite back to normal yet. “Can we walk down by the water?”
“Sure.”
I took a gulp of the water she handed me to help cool me down, and then set it on the table on the deck. She set her wine down and walked with me down the steps to the lake. The moon cast a bright glow over the calm waters.
“Have you ever done this before?” she asked as she too looked out on the hypnotizing water.
“What?” I asked, as she couldn’t have meant being down by the lake.
“Seen one woman over a period of time?”
My jaw clenched again, annoyed that she was treating me like a player, even though I knew that’s what I’d been up until recently.
“Yes. I had a girlfriend in high school and dated a few women in college.” I decided her reaction had to be more than just seeing me with Lauren. I wasn’t a relationship expert, but most women I knew would have asked about it instead of jumping ahead to deciding I was a cheater. “How about you?”
“College. He was a football player. We actually considered living together after college but then I learned he was cheating on me the whole time.”
Ah ha. “So, all football players are cheaters?” I turned to look at her, wanting to see her expression.
She arched a brow. “It’s not like you don’t have a reputation.”
Fuck, that hurt. “Not for cheating, I don’t.” When she didn’t answer, I said, “There’s a difference between spending an enjoyable evening with a woman, no strings attached, no expectations, and being with a woman who does have expectations.”
“We never discussed expectations.”
“How’s this? I expect that both us, for the time we’re doing whatever it is we’re doing here, to be monogamous. I can keep my dick in my pants.” I laughed at myself. “Well, I could and was doing it with success until I met you.”
Her lips twitched up as she turne
d to look back over the water.
“I’m not whoever that asshole football player you dated in college was,” I said, wanting to make sure she understood that.
“No, you’re not,” she said.
“Good.” We stood in silence, gazing at the water. We seemed to hit a truce and yet, she still felt a bit apart from me. Perhaps it was time to get off the subject of exes and cheaters. “How are your mini-retreat plans going?”
“Good. I’m keeping it a bit loose and low key. Allie did say she’d come over one day during the retreat and do a yoga session for us. I was going to ask you to pose for us, but I don’t want to share.”
Another step closer to her, I thought. “It’s probably against the rules anyway.”
She slipped her hand into mine, and then held it out so she could study it. “I’d like to paint you, still.”
“Clearly, when it comes to you, I’m willing to break rules.”
She smiled up at me, and I was ready to hand her the moon hanging over the lake. “Can we start now?”
“Now? What do I have to do?” I asked, not sure I was ready to have her study me naked. Fuck me, yes. Paint me? I wasn’t sure.
“Strip while I get my sketch book. I’ll draw you first.”
“Here?” I looked along the banks of the lake. We were completely alone. The few cabins out here were empty until her retreat. The lodge was a half-mile away, and it wasn’t likely the Minors would be out anyway. Since it was night, no one would be here.
She nodded. “We’re alone. No one will see.” She arched a brow. “For a daring man, you seem a little skittish.”
“I guess I am.”
She slid her hands over my chest. “I’ll take good care of you. I promise.”
I wanted to please her. It was crazy how much I wanted to please her. “Sure. Okay. Everything?”
“Everything. Right here. I want to capture you with the lake and moon.” Her face was lit up with excitement.
“Okay,” I said, still not sure, but willing to do it if it made her happy. I tugged my shirt off.
She ran her hands over my chest again, and then rushed into her house to grab her things.