CHAPTER 2: THE MYSTERY OF RUSSIAN WOMEN
America vs. Russia: it’s more than politics
Now I am going to make an arrogant claim – if you have ever dated a Russian woman or were married to one, you will NEVER go back to women of your own country. That’s a guarantee! While some principles are universal for women all over the world (afternoon tea with girlfriends, shopping, spa visits), cultural and societal influences have created very clear character distinctions between Russian and Western women.
Sex appeal and femininity. If you’ve ever visited Russia or any other Former Soviet Union country, you have certainly noticed the way women there are dressed and groomed: high heels and mini-skirts are a common sight, and you have to look for women without makeup. A Russian woman will never wear sweatpants when stepping outside the house (in fact, she is not likely to wear them inside the house either).
But the difference between Russian and Western women is more than skin deep. Russian women don’t go to all that effort just to see a pretty reflection in the mirror – they like to look sexy for the man they are with. And the sex appeal extends beyond the façade: Russian women know how to keep romance alive and will never punish their man by withholding sex unlike Western women.
Beauty and brains. This combination is more a rule than an exception; most women are in great shape, intelligent, educated, and well-rounded.
Education. Education is taken seriously in Russia. The school system gives children a wider knowledge base than American schools, for example, and there are more people with university degrees than without.
Healthy lifestyle. This comes naturally due to living conditions: women walk a lot because most people don’t have cars; they eat home cooked food (and it is good!) since restaurants are considered expensive. As a result, diet and sports are not as popular as they are in the West simply because there is no need for it.
Personality. The main qualities of Russian women are their patience and tolerance. Some things these women can forgive and cope with are more than any Western woman will be ready to bear. Striking a compromise comes naturally, and they generally will do anything it takes to save a relationship. Russian women are generally more considerate and reliable; they look to form a partnership in a relationship, not a competition, as has become common in the West.
Motherhood. Russian women truly are natural-born mothers and keepers of the hearth, full of care and warmth which they are ready to share with their loved ones. In fact, you can expect their affection to extend well past you – they will gladly shower your family with their care as well.
Consideration. It is typical for Russian women to think about others more than about their family and children) for so long that they have it engraved in their minds.
Responsibility. This quality comes naturally – Russian women bear a lot of responsibility on different levels of society and expect little assistance from men. Their sense of responsibility is so great that most Russian women will stay with their husbands even if they would be better off without one (many Russian men drink and mistreat their women). These women can move mountains, but they will never brag about it as many Western women do by claiming their rights and independence.
Action without drama. Russian women will not blow things out of proportion. Life has taught them to cope easily with any situation. These women mature early because they learn responsibility from an early age; they prefer action to drama. When Russian women face challenges, they turn their mind to the task at hand instead of looking for ways to escape the problem; once a Russian woman tackles the issue, she will never brag about what she has accomplished because to her it is the way thing should be.
Being serious and straightforward. You will notice that Russian women stay serious more and smile less than Western women. This happens for two reasons: they generally face difficulties in life from an early age and also don’t want to be taken lightly. Their serious manner of communication often leads Western men to believe that women are not interested, but the only way to really know what your Russian woman thinks or feels is to ask her. Russian women can be rather blunt in their statements, and if you present her with a straight-forward question, you will get a straight-forward answer.
Traditional. Russian women are traditional and will expect a man to make the first move. They will not approach you first and, frequently, will not even show their interest. Western men often get confused while trying to figure out whether a particular woman is interested in a relationship. Also, men quickly move on if they don’t see obvious signs of a woman’s interest (flirting, being forward) instead of discussing the issue directly to find out what she feels.
Faithfulness. Russian women are very forgiving of unfaithfulness from their spouses; they prefer to forgive than to break up. This happens because many women are insecure or because they think they will not find a better man (some women say: “better a cheater, than a beater”). However, it is common for Russian women who have come to live in America to change their views overtime and become less tolerant of unfaithfulness.
For richer or poorer. When a Russian woman marries a man, she really plans to spend her life with him. I recently had a conversation with a friend of mine who is a lawyer – despite the economic crisis, his practice is booming, and most of his money comes from handling divorce. With many families facing financial difficulties in America, many women are leaving their husbands because they are not earning as much money or because they have lost the source of income. This is something that will never happen if you are married to a Russian woman. In fact, your relationship will become stronger, because your Russian woman will stand by your side and work with you to overcome challenges and bring stability to your life.
These claims are not idle praise of Russian women – knowing about these traits and cultural specifics will help you understand their communication style and avoid some common problems in your relationship.
Many faces of Russian women
Foreigners often think that women are the same on the entire territory of the former Soviet Union, but there are many differences between women from different regions – from appearance to mentality and lifestyle. Here is your brief guide to the many faces of Russian women.
Ukraine
Ukrainian women are considered to be the most beautiful women on the territory of the former Soviet Union. Sadly, difficult life conditions have caused many of them to learn how to use their looks for their own benefit – that is why you hear about so many scammers from Ukraine. However, not all Ukrainian women are scammers, many of them are genuinely interested in finding a husband and creating a family.
–––– Resource! ––––
To find out how to avoid becoming a scam victim, visit www.OksanaLove.com/rbscam and enter your email to claim your free gift - first chapter of the book “Scam me NOT”. Also, you will be automatically enrolled to win a free copy of my book
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Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Kirgizstan
These countries are a part of Central Asia, so Asian culture has had a strong influence on women from these areas; they are very different from women in any other FSU country. Kazakhstani women, for example, combine traditional qualities of Asian women with many modern views of Eastern European women. You will find these women traditional in their views, raised to respect their men and treat them as kings. At the same time, living in a modern country, these women must have an excellent level of education and be able to speak a foreign language to get a good job. Truthfully speaking, I believe that women of Kazakhstan make the best wives (and it isn’t just because I am originally from this country).
Russia
Russia is so vast that you will see a big difference even between women from different cities. I give you a brief description of women from three large cities of Russia: Moscow, being the largest, Saint-Petersburg, and Novosibirsk.
Native townswomen of Moscow (as opposed to people who relocated to the city from other areas of the country) are very p
roud to be called Muscovites. Such women generally consider those who were not born in Moscow foreigners, strangers, and, often, low class representatives. Many such women are lazy when it comes to family life and think they are God’s gift to men. It is rather challenging to communicate with such women. With Moscow being the most expensive city in a world (they beat Tokyo a few years ago), you can expect women from this city to expect royal treatment all the time, including extravagantly expensive gifts that can equal your mortgage payment (yes, they do receive such gifts regularly from Russian men!). If you are looking for a woman in Moscow, make sure that she is not a native, but relocated to the city later in life.
Saint-Petersburg women are quite different from Muscovites. The city is considered a cultural capital of Russia due to numerous museums, architectural memorials, libraries, theatres, and other similar establishments. Most women who were born and raised here have one or more university degrees, speak several languages, have excellent manners, and are true ladies who consider themselves nearly royalty. They do not tolerate people without manners and will never give the time of day to a man who doesn’t know how to court a woman.
Novosibirsk, the second largest city in Russia, is a well-developed industrial city located in Siberia. Because of living in cold conditions most of the time, women of Novosibirsk have white skin and look 10-20 years younger than their age. However, they are also rather cold when it comes to their character – such women are generally more reserved and cautious in communication, but great people once you get to know them. Generally women from Novosibirsk lead comfortable lives, make decent money, and like to travel to warm places. Since the number of men in the city is a lot less than the number of women, ladies from Novosibirsk get very lonely, but they won’t jump into your arms right away – it takes them time to warm up to people. Travelling to Novosibirsk is more challenging than going to Moscow or Saint-Petersburg, however, if you are after blondes with blue eyes, about 70% of women in this city would perfectly match your criteria.
Naturally, I can’t tell you about every city and village in that corner of the world, but at least you know that women from different areas can vary in character and mentality quite a bit. Now that you know about these differences, you can make your communication with Russian women more effective – you know not to stereotype them and can adjust your communication accordingly.
What your Russian bride can do for you
As I have already said, the search for your Russian bride is really just the beginning. Her arrival to your country is when you finally get to the good stuff – sharing many wonderful experiences, discovering new angles of your relationship, and getting to know each other even better. It will also be the time of change for both of you – for her more so than you. Being exposed to a different culture will certainly transform her views and preferences, but, in my experience, these changes are usually for the best.
Your Russian wife will most likely direct her sense of great responsibility and ability to work hard towards her home, family, and/or career. Intelligence and persistence allow most Russian women to learn the language quickly, to find and succeed in a job, as well as to maintain an immaculate home with ease and smile. Most women married to foreigners see living abroad as a way to be free: financially, emotionally, and spiritually. Many Russian women say that moving abroad has given them the chance to do the things they had always dreamt about doing (travelling, helping family, pursuing personal interests), but they are also ready to work for it.
If your woman has the mind of an entrepreneur, especially if she had a business at home, she will generally follow the same path in the new country and can often achieve even greater results due to having more opportunities. When such women marry somebody without much money, they readily invest in their partner’s life and strive to improve it and make more satisfying. Russian women are very generous and are generally ready to share if they believe that a man’s intentions are sincere and true. I have a great example to support this.
Svetlana was a member of my VIP program (she paid me to find the right man for her). She was a successful business owner of a real estate company in Kazakhstan and didn’t place any emphasis on a man’s income; she wanted to find someone who was kind, who loved children and would make a good role model for them, a real gentleman, of course, who would stand by her side and love her just the way she is.
Jim was a good, kind, giving middle-class man. The only problem was that he had lost nearly everything he had owned after his divorce with an American woman. I introduced Svetlana to Jim via Skype; a month later the two met in the Dominican Republic – they connected the instant they saw each other.
Svetlana’s attitude to Jim’s situation was not something you would often find among American women: she was convinced that things would change after her arrival to the United States. And she was right. Once the two were married, Svetlana did all she could to improve their lives: she bought a house, started her own business, and helped her husband to get a huge promotion at work by believing in him, supporting him, and guiding him. Shortly after his promotion, Jim got an offer for a better job with a different company where he makes three times the amount he did before meeting Svetlana. This is a perfect illustration of the saying that there always is a wise woman behind every successful man. Oh, and did I mention that Svetlana is 5’9’, has a body of a model and is 18 years younger than Jim?
Russian Russian vs. American Russian
It is also possible for you to meet a Russian woman who is already living in America, but you need to be aware of the fact that such women will be different from their fellow countrywomen. The table below lists qualities for both groups of women.
YOUR EXPECTATIONS FROM A WOMAN
Russian women in USA
Russian women abroad
She has to know English very well
60%
30%
Woman must relocate to my city or country ( I live in a cold climate or state with 4 seasons)
Nearly 30% would agree; additional efforts on your part are required.
100% would agree.
She has to adapt her preferences to the lifestyle of a new country (food, music, reading, TV programs, friends).
Only 5% would agree.
60% of women would adjust their preferences to meet your expectations (this is accurate only for those women who don’t have family and friends in the USA).
She has to be absolutely gorgeous, but be ready to meet an average guy with an average lifestyle.
10% chance.
100% chance.
She will be with a man 10+ years older than her.
30%
100%
A white female looking to meet a white male.
100%
100%
An Asian Russian looking to meet a white male.
20%
100%
A dark skin Russian looking to meet a white male.
2%
0.5%
A white female looking to meet an African-American man.*
15% - generally found in large cities.
60% in countries like Kazakhstan.
An Asian Russian looking to meet an African-American man.
20%
10% in countries like Kazakhstan.
A white female looking to meet an Asian man.
5%
15% in countries like Kazakhstan.
A woman prefers to travel to a man’s country/home city for the first meeting.
10% chance.
80% chance.
COMMON STATEMENTS
BY MEN
Positive response from Russian women in USA
Positive response from Russian women abroad
It is ok to check singles profiles even if I am married. I am not meeting anybody, so I am not hurting anybody.
10%
80%
I like to write about myself. The more I tell about myself via email, the higher chances of her being interested in me. I like to write
at least 2 pages of bio.
5%
75%
I like to get to know people well via emails. I prefer to correspond via email several times a week at least for 6 months before meeting in person.
0%
50%
I sometimes smoke marijuana and occasionally use prescription drugs such as pain killers.*
10%
1%
YOUR HABITS
Positive response from Russian women in USA
Positive response from Russian women abroad
I have a moustache or a beard.
10%
50%
I live in the country and lead a simple life.*
5%
80%
I live in the country and lead an extravagant lifestyle; I want a girl who likes or wouldn’t mind living in the country.
20%
90%
I live in a big city.
80%
100%
My education is less than a master’s degree, but I have a clean job and a stable income.
90%
50%
I am a non-office worker (plumber, electrician, construction worker, handy man, etc.).
10%
80%
I am a government worker.
20%
100%
I like to talk on the phone for hours and prefer to get to know another person this way. We have to talk for several hours almost each day.
0%
80%
I want a woman who doesn’t have kids and who doesn’t want to have kids.
5%
1-5%
I want to get married and am mentally prepared to do whatever it takes when I meet the right woman.
Russian Allure Page 2