That Close

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by Suggs


  My spirit was suddenly filled with every show I’d watched in fifty-odd years, broadcast from this building, from Nationwide to Morecambe and Wise. I urged the people on the top floor to get out before the Daleks got them. I was getting right into it, as the memories flashed past my eyes like a drowning man. The first time we came here as wild-eyed, hollow-cheeked teenagers to perform on Top of the Pops, WHAT!!?!! And the millions of appearances since.

  But never mind how many times we’d appeared on these hallowed premises, how many shows have we been banned from? Well from immediate memory: The Terry Wogan Show; Tiswas; Children in Need; This Morning and, from Top of the Pops, about eight times. We’d cock something up or mime irreverently and we’d get banned.

  As our spaceship set strained at the guy ropes and the sleet lashed our faces, the trumpet player had his instrument frozen to his lips. Nobody else had any feeling in their fingers. But off we went, the buoyant crowd of Madness fans and now ex-BBC employees raised the spirits. People were hanging out of the top-floor windows and waving from passing buses and tube trains. The atmosphere was stoic, British and brilliant … then my trousers fell down.

  *

  The echoes of all this are still reverberating. We’ve played to the biggest global TV audience as part of the Olympic Games closing ceremony. I think back to those seven fresh-faced young chaps from North London who thought they’d made it when they got a residency at their local pub. What an extraordinary adventure we’ve all been in together since those naïve and chaotic days as The Invaders. And I realise I’d rather be surrounded by my noisy, frustrating gang of fools than anybody else. Madness have always, from the early days, been a sort of surrogate family – with all the frustration, the annoyance, the aggro. A fucked-up, chaotic, ridiculous, argumentative, impossible … unbeatable lot.

  Dad developing photographs.

  Mum singing with Kenny Clayton.

  Bill ‘Man Mountain’ Benny (left). ‘Anyone lost a shoe?’

  Auditioning for the Chippendales.

  Aunt Diana takes a photo in the Preseli Mountains.

  Me and my cousin Hector in Haverfordwest.

  Last of the international bootboys, trousers supplied by Laurence Corner, the soles of the Dr. Martens – white.

  Me and Clive Langer in the luxurious kitchen at Swanky Modes.

  Window of Swanky Modes with Scarlett.

  Theatrical and brilliant – Deaf School.

  Pauline Black, Me and Neville Staple.

  Another quiet night on the 2 Tone tour.

  The songwriting process – another cracker from the Madness hit factory.

  James Bond and Dr No.

  Doubledecker ‘Nutty Train’.

  Dave Robinson, the boss of Stiff , directing the ‘Tomorrow’s Just Another Day’ video. Thommo, obviously, dressed as an elf.

  Chalky, Rob, Toks, Me, Lee and Woody. The hugely unsuccessful Madness five-aside team.

  ‘I’m home, dear.’

  Woody.

  Hanging out making the ‘One Better Day’ video.

  In-flight entertainment.

  Toks and Chalky in the offices of Liquidator Studios.

  Getting married. Anne ordered snow.

  Camden Mews, Scarlett about to be born. The lovely Karmann Ghia, whose days were numbered.

  At home with the McPs.

  ‘I’ve been riding on my bike’.

  Madstock – an earthquake had erupted.

  ‘Are you still into football, Ma’am?’

  On top of the Palace.

  Closing the Olympics.

  Me and Mamba watching the football.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  Madness. Dave Robinson, Paul Conroy, Rob Dickins, Kellogs, Matthew Sztumpf. Garry, Katy, Jam, James and Nathan and all at Anglo Management. Hugh, Mel, Tony and Gareth and all at Hannah Management. PBJ. Colin Young and all at C.C. Young & Co. Chris and all at Another Tongue. Robert Kirby. Richard and Josh and all at Quercus. Patrick Maguire.

 

 

 


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