by S. A. Hunter
His closeness made me uncomfortable. “Damien, really, go to class. I’ll catch up with you.”
“Nope.”
“I could call security.” I could, but what would they do? If he wasn’t actively hurting anyone or destroying anything, they weren’t about to lay hands on him.
“Go ahead.” He leaned into my legs and swung his body around to lay back, using my legs to prop up his back. His poufy dark hair peeked over my knees. It was a funny view. I uncurled one finger and poked at his hair. His hair was so thick that my finger disappeared into it. He didn’t react. I wondered if he even knew I was messing with his hair.
“I don’t want to fight anymore,” he said.
My finger stopped. “We aren’t fighting.”
“But we pretend to all the time. I don’t want to do that anymore.”
“It helps with the charade.”
“I don’t like it. I don’t like being mean to you.”
“So you just want to be friends.” The words didn’t tear up my throat this time.
He craned his neck to look back at me. “I want us to pretend that we’re just friends.”
“Oh.” And just like that, everything was good again.
“You thought I was giving up on you?”
I couldn’t look at him as shame washed over me. I turned my head to the window again. “Yeah.”
“And that really upset you.”
“Damien,” I said, feeling uncomfortable.
“Is it bad that that makes me happy?”
“Seems a little sadistic,” I muttered.
He grinned to himself and settled back against my calves. Was that really it? Could we pretend to be only friends? I doubted it. People were sure to get suspicious. But he was right, being mean to each other was not healthy, even if it was fake.
We sat together, both looking out the window. Birds flew back and forth through the courtyard. A Noble delivery van came in and various staff came out to unload it. It was quiet and peaceful. Of course, he couldn’t handle it but for a few minutes.
He sat up and twisted around to face me. “What are you doing for winter break?”
I shrugged. “Staying home. Relaxing. What are you doing?”
“I was thinking about going to the beach.”
I smiled wistfully at that. “That sounds nice.”
“I can bring friends with me.”
I nodded absently. “That sounds good. You should.”
“Sarah.” He was giving me a look.
“What?”
“Would you like to come with me?”
I shook my head. I didn’t even need to think about it. “I can’t. That would be silly.”
“Why? I said I can bring friends.”
“Yeah. Friends. Who else are you inviting?”
His brow furrowed. “Angela, I guess.”
“Have you asked her?”
“No, but I’m sure she’ll come.”
He was being a little too cavalier with Angela, but I didn’t challenge him on it. Instead, I said, “My parents can’t afford to send me.”
He waved away my excuse. “We’ll take my private jet. There’s nothing to worry about.”
“Your private jet?” I really hoped he’d misspoken and he didn’t really own—
“Yeah, Dad gave it to me for my last birthday. I haven’t used it yet.”
I could only stare at him. Of course, he had a private jet. “Where would we stay?” I asked weakly, but I already had an idea of what he would say.
“We have a house in Hawaii. It has plenty of rooms.”
“I’d have to ask my parents.”
“They could come too.”
“What?!”
His eyes darted away. “We’ll need chaperones, right? And I like your parents.”
My heart melted at him saying that about my parents. “Why would we need chaperones? Won’t your parents be there?”
He shuddered. “God, no.”
To tell the truth, knowing his parents wouldn’t be there was a relief. I still found them quite intimidating, especially Mr. West. “I’ll ask my parents. When would we leave?”
“The first day after exams, and we could stay until school starts again.”
“But what about Christmas?” I’d never spent Christmas away from home.
“We could put a tree up.”
“Won’t your parents want to see you?”
He didn’t answer, which meant yes, but he didn’t want to see them.
“I think we should plan for after Christmas. Like the twenty-sixth or twenty-seventh.”
He frowned.
“What?” I asked.
“You don’t want to spend Christmas together?”
His question caught me off guard. I hadn’t considered it. I liked the idea, but it felt wrong to not be home for Christmas. Noble staff always had a Christmas party. I’d gone to it every year. And Cora always came out to stay with us. If we were in Hawaii, she’d be all alone on Christmas.
“We’ll figure something out.”
“I just did. We all go to Hawaii.”
I grimaced. I didn’t know how to tell him that I didn’t want to go to Hawaii for Christmas. It was an incredibly generous thing he was offering, but I wanted to be home. I wanted to see Cora and be around the rest of the Noble staff. But I did want to go to Hawaii. I wanted to take my parents to the beach. But after Christmas. But I couldn’t make demands. It was his jet and his beach house. He was offering us a lavish vacation, refusing seemed ungrateful. I felt terribly conflicted.
The bell rang.
“We missed English. We shouldn’t our foreign language classes,” I said.
He knew I wasn’t on board for his Christmas in Hawaii idea, and he was taking my rejection personally, but I didn’t know how to explain myself. I uncurled my body and stood up. He remained seated. I held out my hand. “We can start acting nicer to each other. We can appear to be friends.”
He got up without taking my hand.
We walked out in silence. Damien wasn’t happy, but I wasn’t willing to cave to what he wanted. At least it was third period and I wouldn’t have to sit beside him while he stewed. He headed to Japanese while I headed to Spanish.
It was funny that the reason I’d been upset had been resolved, but there was a brand-new thing now putting a rift between us. I felt bad, but he didn’t understand. Christmas was family. Maybe it was because he’d never been happy and close to his folks, but every Christmas for me had been special. Waking up and going to see what was under the tree. The staff would gather out in the courtyard in the afternoon to sing carols and have eggnog. Christmas was pretty special for Noble and the thought of not being here for it felt wrong.
After Spanish class, I headed to the cafeteria for lunch. I’d thought about texting Damien during Spanish to check on him, but I was worried he might not text me back. I could’ve texted Angela for an update, but it felt cheap to use her like that. I didn’t need to worry anyway. Both were at our table when I arrived. Angela greeted me brightly. She wasn’t nervous or upset, and Damien appeared relatively relaxed. Our little disagreement hadn’t sent him into a tailspin then.
“She said yes,” he said by way of greeting.
I knew what he meant, but I still asked, “Yes to what?”
“Going to Hawaii with you guys for New Year’s. We’ll have so much fun!” she said.
I blinked in surprise and glanced at Damien. He’d backed down?
“Sounds great. I still have to talk to my parents.”
He didn’t comment. He was still miffed, but he’d get over it.
I talked to my parents that night about going to Hawaii. Mom at first said no, even after I told her that Damien wanted her and Dad to come too. She’d barked an ugly laugh and said something about, “Of course, he’d be happy to have two more servants along.” Dad had pulled her back to their bedroom to talk in private. I admit that I eavesdropped a little. I heard Dad say something about it being a wonderful o
pportunity for me. When they came back out, Mom told me that she needed more details. Dates, times, addresses. She also wanted to make sure the Wests were fine with this also.
That last bit gave me pause. I doubted he had even thought about mentioning this to his parents, never mind asking them if it was okay. When I asked him about it the next day, he’d given me a blank stare and hadn’t answered. And since then, classes had gotten more intense as exams crept closer. He hadn’t acted out as much, but when I tried to ask him if he’d talked to his parents, he always changed the subject. I still wasn’t sure if I was going to Hawaii or not.
“DO YOU HAVE PLANS FOR winter break?”
Noah’s question surprised me. I supposed it was polite to ask, but I wish he hadn’t. I felt embarrassed saying it, but I told him the truth, “Damien has some idea of taking all of us to Hawaii, but I don’t know if it’s actually going to happen.”
He turned back to his laptop. “It sounds very romantic.”
“It won’t be. My parents are coming with us.” I figured I should ask him the same. “Do you have anything planned?”
“Not yet. Sort of playing it by ear.”
I tried reading my textbook more, but I was going cross-eyed over it. I’d studied for three hours straight. I’d hit my limit. I started packing up. Noah started doing the same.
“The library’s open for another two hours,” I told him.
He shrugged. “I’ve hit my max. I’m not getting anything done now.”
It was sort of comforting to hear he had limits also. It did mean though that we walked out together. I still didn’t want to be seen. I ducked my head and hunched my shoulders. I didn’t want people to see my sloppy clothes and messy hair. And I didn’t want anyone possibly reporting to Damien that I’d been there. I was so focused on hiding my face that I failed to see the girls coming into the library until I walked straight into them. It startled me so badly that I tripped backward and fell. All heads turned toward the entrance. A number of people stood up from their seats to get a better view of what was going on.
“Sarah, are you all right?” Noah asked. He crouched down to check on me.
I could feel my face reddening with embarrassment. I ducked my head and let Noah help me up.
He turned to the girls and turned on the charm. “We’re so sorry about that. Are you all right?”
The girls nodded, smiling at him.
He put his hands on my shoulders and steered me to the exit. I couldn’t look anyone in the eye. I was so embarrassed.
He kept guiding me down the hall, heading to the apartment building. My face had cooled down, and I felt like I could safely look around without flinching. I pushed away his hands and relaxed. “Well, that was graceful,” I said sarcastically.
“Not a big deal,” he said.
My phone buzzed, indicating a text.
It was Angela. *Sarah, were you in the library?*
I winced when I read it. I didn’t want her to think I was avoiding her, but that was basically what had happened. *Yeah, I wanted a change of scene, but I didn’t want to bring you any drama. Damien has been a pest.*
*I understand, but why was Noah with you?*
I glanced over at Noah, who was still walking with me. I wasn’t sure why he hadn’t peeled off yet to go back to his room. *He just happened to show up. He helped me study. How’s your studying going?*
*I got a lot done. It’s probably good that you didn’t join me. Damien did come by.*
*I know. I hid in the girls’ bathroom to avoid him.*
*Haha.*
We’d reached the staff apartment building. I turned to him. “Thanks for walking me home,” I said, though I had no clue why he had, and I had no intention of letting him into the building with me.
“Do you have Prof. Edward for History?” he asked.
“Yeah. Why?”
“I could help you study. I think I still have my flashcards.”
The offer surprised me, and it was too tempting to pass up. I hadn’t made any flashcards for Edward’s exam, getting some free ones would be very helpful.
“What about your own studying?”
He shrugged. “I’ll get it done. Helping you will be a nice break.”
I wasn’t sure why he was helping me, but his help would be a huge boon. “Do you want to meet again at the library tomorrow at nine o’clock?” he asked.
“Same spot?”
He nodded.
I had gotten a lot of work done there. “Yeah, sounds good.”
He smiled and headed away up the path.
I watched him go and wondered why he was being so nice to me. We hadn’t hung out much since the West Estate. He would sit with us occasionally to have lunch, but it was primarily to needle Damien. Since he was in another grade, we didn’t see each other except in passing in the halls. Damien and I had avoided all school functions. We hadn’t gone to any of the dances or banquets that had occurred since the one fundraiser we’d attended. I’d heard Noah had attended all of them with a different girl each time. There was a lot of talk about who he was dating. He hadn’t taken any girl out more than once, much to each girl’s dismay.
My phone began to ring. It was Damien calling. For once, perfect timing. “Hey,” I said.
He didn’t immediately respond.
“Damien?”
“You picked up.”
“Yeah. I’m done studying for now.”
“You are?” There was a hopeful lilt in his voice.
“Yeah, do you want to hang out?”
“Game room?”
I looked down at myself still in my disguise. I needed to change. “Give me a few minutes. I’ll meet you there. Is Angela joining us?”
“I wasn’t going to call her.”
I grimaced. I knew he wanted to spend one-on-one time with me, but in a public setting like the game room, people would notice us alone together.
“I’ll give her a call,” I said.
He sighed. “Fine.”
I called Angela as I went up to the apartment to change into nicer clothes. She agreed to join us. I told Mom and Dad where I was going and promised not to stay out too late. When I got to the game room, I had a bounce in my step. I felt ready to have some fun. I was surprised to find Noah with Damien when I got there.
Damien wasn’t happy about the other boy’s presence.
“Wanna play a board game?” Noah asked. He held up a stack of games.
We picked Settlers of Catan to play. Or rather Angela, Noah, and I agreed to it. Damien had gone silent.
Noah and I set up the board. I’d played the game a couple of times with friends in middle school, but that had been over a year ago now. It felt odd remembering those times.
I sneaked a look at Damien. His face was blank. What was bugging him? Had Noah invited himself? I was sort of glad that he was there. There weren’t many games that were good for three people. Four was a better number for games.
Damien and Angela had never played the game so the first game was basically Noah and me showing them the ropes. The second game was more competitive. It also ran longer. I was yawning by the time the second game finished. Noah barely won though Angela almost had it.
“That was fun, guys,” I said, helping put all the pieces back. Angela nodded happily. Damien got up. He’d been pretty subdued during the whole game. He’d played but hadn’t gotten into it much. He hadn’t been rude or angry, just quiet.
“I’ll see you,” he said and turned and left.
I watched him walk away in surprise. Wasn't he going to walk me back? I turned to Angela, and she looked as perplexed as me.
I was on the path back to the apartment building when I heard rustling in a nearby bush. I stopped and looked around cautiously. I didn’t see anyone or anything. I started walking more quickly. The rustling increased and got closer. I was getting nasty flashbacks of Volkov and Mr. Jones. I started running, but the rustling got louder and an arm shot out and wrapped around me. My screech was cu
t off by a hand over my mouth.
“It’s me,” Damien said.
I shoved him away angrily and turned to glare at him. “Jesus! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
“That makes us even for you inviting Noah and Angela,” he said.
“What?”
“We can be alone together occasionally.”
“A little, but we can’t let anyone suspect that you’re cheating on Angela.”
“Fine. I understand inviting Angela, but why’d you invite Noah?” he asked.
“I didn’t.”
“He said you did.”
I shook my head. “He’s lying. I didn’t invite him.”
“Dammit, that’s why I should never trust him.”
I couldn’t get that mad about Noah joining us. He’d rounded out the group nicely.
“Have you talked to your parents about Hawaii?”
His eyes darted away. “Yes.”
It couldn’t be more apparent that he was lying. “My parents won’t let me go unless you talk to yours.”
“I don’t know why it matters!”
“So why won’t you just tell them then?”
He kept his eyes turned away.
“Are you afraid they’ll say no?”
“No. They’ll want to come!”
“Oh.” The thought that his parents would be there put me on edge. If the Wests went to Hawaii, my parents were sure to not come. We hadn’t seen his parents since Mr. West’s birthday party. They’d sent a letter to my parents apologizing for any offense, but it was clear from the wording that they didn’t really know what they were apologizing for and that their lawyer had most likely drafted the letter. My parents hadn’t accepted the apology.
“See! I can’t tell them!” he said.
“But they’ll know. We can’t hide this from them.”
“Mother has plans to go to a spa. Once she’s there, she’ll be unreachable, and Father will be busy with work.”
“I can’t lie to my parents.”
“Just tell them that it’ll be taken care of.”
We both knew that was bending the truth.