“Okay, my teeth are clean now. Happy?” Jenny skipped into the room and smirked up at the beast with his shaved head, rippling muscles, and scars that crisscrossed his face. “I’m hungry.”
“As you always are,” the beast said in a surprisingly quiet voice that held the slightest hint of an accent. The man was taller than even Ciro Donati, with shoulders as wide as the door, so I was expecting something closer to a demonic sound coming from his thick as a tree trunk throat. “If you get dressed, I will take you and Eloise out for breakfast.”
“Really?” The little girl started jumping up and down, making her light brown hair sway around her shoulders. “Can I have waffles with lots of whipped cream?”
“Whatever you want.” His eyes flicked to me, but for some reason, I didn’t feel scared of him. He didn’t smile or show a flicker of emotion on his face, something I was jealous of, because right then I wanted to turn off every single emotion I had ever felt for the man beside me. Jarvis’s gaze went from me straight to Dante, who gave a nod of approval. “Let’s go.”
“Yay! Okay. Bye, Dante. I’ll see you after school…right?” The hesitation in her question, as if she was afraid of getting a negative answer, made something in my chest sting. But I pushed the feeling as far down as I could manage, not ready to examine it yet.
“I’m going to be here for the next two weeks, Jenny,” he promised her with a smile I knew all too well. It was the one he always reserved for me.
Christ, I was not jealous of my little sister. That was crazy, and I wasn’t petty enough to go as far as being jealous of a child who didn’t have a single hand in causing me the pain I was feeling.
“Then we can finish our chess match!” She laughed happily. “I’m so glad you’re home.”
“Me too, kid.”
Eloise and the beastly man followed the girl out of the kitchen, leaving me alone with Dante and my mother. Suddenly, I wanted to call the man back, but I didn’t understand why. Maybe it was the protectiveness I felt between him and Jenny. I wanted that feeling back, because the secure sensation Dante had always given me was gone now.
“Allegra, I thought… I never imagined…” Lauren lowered her head. “I’m sorry.”
I closed my eyes and mentally locked up my heart. I should have known better than to ever let anyone inside it in the first place. Hadn’t I always known there was something wrong with me? My own father couldn’t even love me, and now to realize my mother had abandoned me only strengthened the reality of how unlovable I really was. No one was ever allowed in there again. When I lifted my lashes, I couldn’t bring myself to look at her. “I’m glad you’re alive. That you were able to move on and build a new life. You look good. Healthier than I remember, so I’m going to assume this life has been good to you.”
“Allegra—”
“I’ve got a headache,” I interrupted her. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to go lie down.”
Disappointment mixed with something else crossed her beautiful face, but she quickly masked it before I could read the emotion. “Of course, darling.”
“Is there another room I can use? I would like some privacy—and my own bed.”
“You’re not getting your own room,” Dante cut in. “If you want some privacy, I will stay out for a few hours. But you’re not leaving our bed.”
“What you want isn’t something I care about any longer,” I told him with a cold glance before darting my eyes back in my mother’s general direction. “This is a big house. I would assume there is at least one extra bedroom available. I would like to use it.”
A look passed between Lauren and Dante, making it clear to me that if I had dared to hope she might show me at least a little loyalty, I was a complete idiot. I saw the way her eyes skimmed over his face, lovingly—possessively?
Clenching my jaw, I glared at them both. “If it is an inconvenience to want my own room, then perhaps I shouldn’t even be here. Maybe there would be more room for me back at the compound.”
That had Lauren’s eyes snapping back to me, her head shaking adamantly as she banked the flame in her eyes. I had a sudden urge to scratch her still beautiful face as jealousy, of all emotions, flooded through me with the force of a tsunami. The idea of her having the same feelings for him as I did caused bile to toss and turn in my stomach. “No, no. There are plenty of extra rooms. Let me get one prepared while you grab your things. Give me ten minutes,” she said as she backed out of the kitchen in the direction the others had just gone.
As soon as she was out of sight, I moved toward the stairs. Before I could pass Dante, his hand snaked out and caught my wrist in a firm hold. “You belong in our room, Allegra. Didn’t last night prove to you what you mean to me?”
I jerked away from his touch, still sickened by the look I’d seen between him and my mother. The idea that he felt the same for her as I’d seen in her eyes made my skin crawl, just as jealousy ate its way deeper into my mind. “It showed me plenty. I was just too stupid to see the real meaning until it was too late. I thought I knew you. Now I see I know nothing about you at all.”
“You know me better than any other person on the planet.”
That made me laugh, but I hated how bitter it sounded, and I quickly started upstairs. He moved so quietly, I didn’t even realize he’d followed me until I was in his room. The door slammed, and I jerked around to face him. His dark face was set in determined lines, but I wasn’t someone he could conquer.
“I never meant for this to happen. It wasn’t how I planned it to go.”
I raised my brows. “Just how did you expect meeting my dead mother after eleven years to go, Dante?”
“I thought you would be happier to see her. That you would be so glad she was alive, you wouldn’t care about the rest.” He scrubbed his hands down his face and blew out a frustrated breath.
“I am glad she’s alive. I’m actually thrilled that she got away from Papa. But what part of her abandoning me should I be happy about?” I demanded. “Which moment should I have been thankful for? When she left me behind to take the beatings? When she started an entirely new family and forgot I existed? A mother should never leave her child behind!”
“She never forgot about you. You have never been far from her thoughts this entire time.” His voice was savage, growly, and unlike anything he had ever used with me before. The look on his handsome face, that protective panther showing in every hard angle, had me backing up a step. For the first time since I met him, I was actually scared of Dante. “Don’t make her out to be a villain, Allegra. She did what she had to just to survive.”
Tears burned my eyes, and his face turned pale. Regret filled his gaze, but I turned away before he could say a word. It wasn’t just the fear he’d caused me; that was now fading. It was the vehemence in his voice as he spoke of her. Had he ever stood up for me like that? Would he ever?
No, I answered the questions internally. No, because I had never mattered to him. It was Lauren whom he cared about, whom he loved. I could still hear it ringing in the air.
And it broke my heart all over again.
“Allegra… I didn’t… Fuck, I would never hurt you.”
Ignoring him, I grabbed all the clothes I’d pulled out of my case in search of something to wear after my shower and stuffed them back inside. Going into the bathroom, I took the toothbrush and shampoo I used earlier, along with a few other items, out of the linen closet. As I grabbed the box of tampons, it hit me just how at the mercy of Dante I really was right now.
My phone was back in my room at the New York compound. I couldn’t contact Victoria or Scarlett, not even my father—not that I would have ever contacted him. And if I decided to leave, what would I do? I didn’t have my purse with my ID, money, and credit cards all inside. My passport was back in New York as well.
None of those things had mattered the day before. Now…
I was trapped here.
No! I wasn’t just going to si
t by and let myself become a victim all over again.
Going back into the bedroom, I dropped everything into the case, but I didn’t bother to zip it closed. Dante just stood there. I felt his eyes on me, could feel his silent command to look at him, but I couldn’t. Everything was different now. The future I’d thought we would have was over now.
Tossing the straps over my shoulder, I walked around him, keeping my eyes on the door ahead.
His voice stopped me when I touched the doorknob. “I’m sorry.”
Chapter 11
Allegra
The room my mother gave me was several doors down from Dante’s. It was smaller than his room but still nice and spacious. I had my own bathroom and a view of the driveway and gardens in the rear of the house. From what little I had seen of the house that morning and the night before, this place was huge. It was in a more upscale part of Chicago, but if I had to guess, it was as far away from the compound as it possibly could be while still being in the same city.
No way would Dante put those he loved so close to the compound, not when Papa could stop by whenever he pleased. No, Dante would want as much distance between Lauren and Jenny as he could get yet still have them within easy reach.
I sat in the windowsill that was wide enough it could have made a great reading nook. But reading was far beyond what I wanted to do at that moment. It had started to snow, and I watched as the huge white flakes fell softly on the ground, blanketing the dead flower beds and play area at the end of the yard.
I remembered having a swing set much like that one. Papa had given it to me for my fifth birthday, and when he was in a good mood, would push me on it. We were happy back then. Or at least, I was. Papa seemed to laugh more, and Mamma would sit on the veranda with Nona, drinking lemonade and watching us.
But now I was hitting rewind on those memories and looking at them through the eyes of a grown woman instead of the wide-eyed, innocent little girl I once was. I could see Nona smiling affectionately, watching with loving eyes as I squealed excitedly for Papa to swing me higher, higher.
But the look in my mother’s eyes?
They hadn’t been nearly as openly caring as Nona’s were. They watched me with a dark, brooding kind of expression that made me wonder if she ever even loved me at all.
How could she love me?
The question filtered through my thoughts, making tears prick my eyes.
How could she possibly love me? I was the spawn of the man she hated. The monster who used her as a punching bag on a daily basis shared DNA with me. The rumors that she was raped, that I was the result of that rape, weren’t really rumors. Deep down, I always knew.
But I was part of her too. Couldn’t she have learned to love me since I was half her?
Laughing weakly, I dashed at the traitorous tears that had fallen, shaking my head at my own musings. Of course she couldn’t. Her dislike of my father was stronger than any love she ever felt for me. Why else would she have left me behind?
A tap on the door had me snapping my head up and around. It was the faintest of knocks, and at first, I thought I was hearing things, but it came again, a little louder this time.
Hesitantly, I stood and crossed to the door. When the knock came again, I opened the door. I knew it wasn’t Dante, but part of me still hoped. That hope was quickly dashed when I saw the girl standing on the other side of the door, a small tray in her hands. On the tray was a dish of cookies and two glasses of milk.
Jenny grinned sheepishly up at me. “Hi!”
I swallowed my surprise and found myself smiling weakly. “Hi.”
“Can I come in? I brought snacks.” Before I could answer, she was pushing the door open wider with her foot, and I quickly stepped back. Using that same foot, she nudged the door closed and headed for the bed.
She placed the tray at the foot of the bed then flopped carelessly down beside it. “Eloise said I shouldn’t bother you because you’re kind of mad at Mom and Dante, but I figured you would be hungry. Whenever Mom makes me mad, cookies always make me feel better.” Picking up one of the cookies, she offered it to me while stuffing another into her mouth.
Curious about this girl who was my half sister, I took the cookie. Patting the bed beside her, Jenny urged me to sit down and handed me one of the glasses of milk. “Eloise is the best cook,” she informed me around her huge mouthful of chocolate chip cookie. “These cookies can make anything better.”
I nibbled on the cookie, enjoying the taste of gooey chocolate and buttery goodness. But sadly, the cookie didn’t magically make everything better.
“Did you marry Dante?” Jenny surprised me by asking. “Like, I knew he was supposed to marry you. He told me he was going to marry you and bring you home to live with us, but I don’t see a wedding ring.”
I glanced down at my left hand, at the ring I’d been so proud to wear when Dante placed it on my finger. I hadn’t even realized I was still wearing the engagement ring; it felt like it was a part of my hand now, and I hadn’t taken it off since we finalized our engagement with Zio Vito.
“No, we’re not married,” I told her in a quiet voice. “Something happened, and we decided not to.”
“Not yet, or not ever?” she asked curiously.
I honestly didn’t know what to tell her, so I just shrugged and took another small bite of my cookie. “I’ll have to get back to you on that.”
She sighed heavily. “That means no.”
My brows lifted at how disappointed she seemed. “Why do you think that?”
“That’s what adults usually mean when they try to put off answering me. That sucks, because I was looking forward to having a big sister.” She stuffed another cookie into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully.
Did she not know I was her sister, regardless of if I married Dante? Something told me she didn’t. She was as clueless as to who I really was to her as I had been of her. Which was probably a good thing. Jenny seemed like the kind of girl who would go looking for answers if she wasn’t given them freely. She was a lot like Dante, and not just in personality.
From the color of her long, brown hair, her dark, espresso eyes, and the even the shape of her lips, I saw a lot of Dante in her. Which meant she took after Arlo De Stefano more than our mother. Jenny might not look like Lauren, but she was beautiful. The perfect feminine version of her father and brother.
Meanwhile, I looked so much like my mother, there was no denying I was her daughter. Apparently, Jenny wasn’t considering that option, however.
“I always wanted a sister too,” I told her now. “But I have two cousins who have always felt like sisters to me. I’m a little older than they are, but I’ve always looked up to them.”
The door opened without warning, and we both jumped when Lauren barged into the room. She glanced from Jenny to me and back to the younger girl. “Don’t you have homework to do, Jenny?” she asked in a tight voice.
“I already finished it, Mom,” Jenny told her with a roll of her eyes.
“Then you have chores to do. Stop bothering Allegra and get to them.”
“I wasn’t bothering her.” She looked up at me with wounded eyes. “Was I?”
“No. I enjoyed your visit.” I lifted the tray as she stood and placed it in her hands. “Maybe we can do it again. But for now, you should do as your mother says. Taking care of your responsibilities is always important.”
The small humph I heard from Lauren told me she got the dig I just threw her way, but it flew right over Jenny’s head. “I’ll be back tomorrow. I’ll bring cheesecake then. Dante told me once you like cheesecake.”
I refused to let that little comment touch my heart as I gave her a small smile. “Sounds like a date. See you then.”
As she left, closing the door behind her, I was surprised to see Lauren didn’t follow suit. The look on her face told me she had something to say, so I sat there, waiting for her to get it over with.
“You haven’t cha
nged much since you were a little girl,” Lauren observed. “Still so prim and proper. Hair perfectly in place, legs crossed at the ankles like a little lady. I always thought that was annoying and couldn’t even look at you without feeling sick.”
Her tone was snide, but her words felt like razor-sharp thorns tearing into my heart. After everything else that had happened that day, I shouldn’t have had a heart left to feel the pain, yet she was proving how wrong I was all over again.
But I refused to let her see how deeply those words cut. “I was so annoying, yet you never made it seem like you cared. You took such good care of me, no one would have thought you couldn’t stand to so much as look at me.”
She shrugged carelessly. “Gio turned me into a really good actress. If something didn’t look perfect to any outside eye, he would beat me with his belt until I got it right.”
I couldn’t contain my shudder at the thought of Papa’s belt. The pain from that leather strap was nothing compared to getting sliced with the belt buckle.
“I never thought he would start hurting you once I was gone.” Her nose scrunched up. “But you look so much like me, to him it must have been like he was still hitting me.”
“Probably. I’m curious, though.” Standing, I positioned myself in front of her, needing to look her in the eye. “If you didn’t care I was being beaten, why send Dante to check on me?”
“He asked about you constantly. I finally gave in and told him to keep an eye on you. To protect you. It was his idea to marry you so he could get you away from Gio.” She smiled coldly. “But lucky for him, that fell through. He was able to bring you here without being tied to you for life. Not that he would have been. Six months and he would have divorced you.”
Sickness rolled in my stomach even as jealousy numbed my heart. “What do you mean?”
“What do you think I mean?” She rolled her eyes like it was so glaringly obvious. “Dante was marrying you to protect you from Gio. He wanted to bring you here to be with me, but he doesn’t love you, Allegra darling. He just wanted to reunite me with my long-lost daughter. He would do anything for me. Anything. Even fuck a little prude like you.”
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