by Jillian Hart
“I don’t know about that, but I won’t say no to it.” He’d learned one thing. Life is shorter and love is more precious than you think. Time rolls on by with no way to slow it down. Babies turn into children; in a blink they become adults, and your life is half-spent. He was going to take this opportunity the Lord had brought him and enjoy every minute, because those minutes just kept passing.
Chapter Ten
“Cheyenne!” Julianna’s singsong voice rose above the music humming from the bookstore’s overhead speakers and the faint rustle of other shoppers. “You’re here!”
She looked up from the book she was browsing just in time to see a little girl dressed in candy-pink dart around a bestsellers display, pigtails flying. “So is your dad. I suppose it’s good that he’s here. I hope he has a lot of room on his credit card.”
Her words must have carried far enough for Adam to hear. The man strode into the store like a warrior facing a no-win battle. Across the wide chasm of bookshelves and the customer service desk, his smile held enough impact to knock her pulse off its even keel. The man had power. He dominated her senses as he marched closer, making everything else fade into the background.
“Why am I not surprised?” A dark look passed across his chiseled features, but there was no force to it. His brown eyes sparkled with threads of gold and flecks of amber. “I should have known you would be here. It was obvious the girls were up to no good.”
“That’s me, no good. I’m a terrible influence on them.”
“No argument from me. I’m in total agreement.” His gaze traveled from her face to the book in her hands. “A romance, really? I didn’t peg you for the type.”
“Just because I’m not optimistic doesn’t mean I haven’t ruled out the far distant and probably small possibility completely.” She tucked the book in the crook of her arm. She liked the way he laughed. It rumbled low and unexpectedly pleasant.
“Dad, you’re laughing.” Jenny gawked up at him, jaw dropped.
“It’s a miracle,” Julianna breathed. “I prayed and prayed and it happened.”
“It’s not that big of a deal.” Adam shook his head, scattering locks of his thick, dark hair. A shock tumbled over his forehead, adding a dash of rogue to the mountain of a man in a gray T and jeans. “It’s laughter, not a parting of the Red Sea. Go look for your books.”
“C’mon, Cheyenne.” Jenny took one hand, and Julianna the other. The girls led her to the back of the store. She stumbled to keep up with them, feeling the weight of Adam’s gaze as she wove around an end cap and down an aisle of computer books.
“I’ll get you a coffee,” his molasses-smooth baritone rang behind her. “What do you like?”
“A mocha. What else?” Hadn’t he learned enough about her to know the only choice was chocolate? She glanced over her shoulder, caught by the sight of the man standing alone in the aisle, surrounded by books and light and shoppers but still essentially solitary. “And cinnamon flavoring.”
“You’ll need sustenance if you are going to keep up with those two.” He pitched his voice so it rose above the noise without being too loud.
Nice. Cozy. Not that she had time to analyze it because the girls tugged her to a stop in the young adult section. Jenny consulted the list she’d saved in her text messages and the two of them hunkered down to look through the rows.
She should be doing the same, but would her gaze shift from the man to the shelves of books?
No. Her eyes refused to follow the instructions her brain adamantly gave them. Look away, look away. Her vision remained glued to the wide back of the man lumbering through the store, tugging at her heart as if a rope bound her to him.
Perhaps it was an aftereffect from being overworked. She’d gotten up before dawn to work with her dad, brothers and Autumn to get as much hay cut as possible. That had to be it. Overwork led to all kinds of problems, which would explain the little hitch in her pulse as Adam stepped into line and she admired his profile. High forehead, straight nose, perfect chin.
“Cheyenne?”
The voice, which came from far away, wasn’t strong enough to break her concentration, but the tug on her hand did. Julianna held up a book.
“Is this one your favorite?” Eyebrows arched, forehead furrowed in question.
“Yes.” She did her best to concentrate on the letters marching across the front cover. “An all-time fave.”
“Okay. How about this one?” She held up another.
“I can’t find a lot of these,” Jenny said, kneeling to inspect the bottom aisle.
“We may have to order them.” She had no idea how old some of the titles were. “I’ll go check in the kids’ section.”
“I’m coming, too.” Julianna bounced alongside her, clutching both paperbacks. “Maybe you should keep Dad company.”
“Why, is he lonely? Can’t find his way to the coffee counter?” She skirted a display of dinosaur books.
“Yes. Do you like him?”
“He’s all right. He seems like a really nice Dad.”
“He’s real happy these days. Not like when Mom left us. She stopped loving him. Do you think she will stop loving Jenny and me?”
“No, I don’t. I’m sure she loves you.” Cheyenne set down her book and knelt so she was eye to eye with the girl. She couldn’t resist brushing back gossamer-fine tendrils from the girl’s face. Tenderness filled her, steady and true. “It’s complicated. Some people are never happy even when they have everything that matters.”
A shadow fell across her. A boot strode into her peripheral vision, followed by a second one. She didn’t need to look up to know who belonged to those feet. She could feel his presence like rain on a southern wind.
“Your mocha.” He held two large to-go cups. “How’s the book hunting going?”
She admired how his casual, breezy words hid the sadness in his gaze. The man wasn’t made only of granite but of strength. She’d misread him. He wasn’t unfeeling, but invincible. Unyielding. Steadfast.
“I’m still looking.” Julianna took a deep breath, as if to draw away from her sorrow, and turned her attention to the shelves. “I found another one.”
“I’m going to steal Cheyenne.” A myriad of silent emotions passed across his face, but to her they were transparent. “Will you come sit and have coffee with me?”
“Regardless of the company, I never turn down a mocha.” Cheyenne squinted up at him appraisingly.
“Had I known that, I would have skipped the whipped cream,” he joked, and she laughed. The soft, melodious trill came naturally to her.
Maybe that’s why he liked her so well. She was a ray of sunshine that scattered his shadows. He could hardly feel them as she swirled neatly around a display and headed to the café section, where small round tables were mostly filled with readers, chatters and a serious few tapping away on laptops. He held out a chair for her and caught her faint vanilla scent.
“I have a confession to make.” She arranged the little straws he’d poked through the sip hole in the plastic lid. “I didn’t go very far out of my way. I was coming to Jackson anyhow.”
“It’s all becoming clear. I can see why we couldn’t go to the smaller bookstore in Sunshine but we absolutely had to drive all the way out here.” He folded his frame into the nearly too-small chair and set his cup on the table. Across the store he could just make out the top of Jenny’s head; no doubt Julianna was close by. “Are we keeping you from anything?”
“No, although I have an errand with my sisters and my dad in a bit.” She shimmered. Maybe it was the light tumbling in through the front window, or simply the way he saw her. “Among other things, the final fitting for the wedding.”
“Yes, the wedding. I’ve heard those are big social events around here.” He took a quick sip of coffee. Hot and bracing and sweet, just the way he liked it. “It’s all I’ve heard about from my patients. Everyone’s excited about it.”
“So are we.” She arched one slender brow. “So, you still have
patients. I guess that means your reputation hasn’t been tarnished yet.”
“No one is more astonished than me. Word seems to have spread. A lot of people drive in from all the neighboring small towns.”
“I guess folks aren’t being too choosy.”
“Exactly.” He laughed again and it felt great. “There’s no accounting for taste. Those poor desperate folk. Is that what you are thinking?”
“Not even close.” Her eyes invited him to say anything. “You like it in Wyoming.”
“I’m starting to acclimate.” He hedged because he had a life he intended to resume in Manhattan. This was an extended vacation, nothing more. “I thought Cady had lost every shred of common sense when she announced she intended to move here.”
“Did you try and talk her out of it?” Interested, she leaned closer.
“Yes.” A man could tumble right into her big blue eyes and fall forever. Good thing he was on sturdy ground and holding on tight. No way was there a chance he was falling. “When she told me she’d purchased a country inn, I was stunned. I’ve known her most of my life and I had no idea that had always been her dream. It must have taken a lot of courage to leave everything she knew behind and to start fresh.”
“She’s landed on her feet.” Cheyenne’s smile dazzled. “She’s made a huge success with her inn. My dad is sure glad she moved to town.”
“I’ve noticed. Love has always passed Cady by, so I’m glad your dad is interested in her. He strikes me as exactly what she deserves.” He took another sip, savoring the rich coffee sliding over his tongue. “Thank you for what you said to Julianna about her mother. My youngest has always been tenderhearted.”
“You’ve done a good job with your girls. Anyone can see you put their welfare first.”
“I’ve tried, but I haven’t been what they needed. I failed them.” He grimaced from the pain of the truth, the sinking feeling of failure that had been haunting him for days. It was nice to be able to open up to someone he could trust. “I was so busy trying to hold what was left of our lives together, to just get us through, I didn’t realize what I wasn’t doing for my daughters.”
“What would that be?” She tilted her head to one side, concerned and thoughtful, drawing him in with her caring.
“Helping them with their feelings.” He didn’t expect Cheyenne to understand; her heart had no barriers. “I couldn’t deal with mine, so I barreled along, trying to get past all the hardship. But it wasn’t simply a matter of time and distance or getting on with life.”
“No.” She pushed aside her cup and focused only on him. “You were doing the best you could at the time, in what had to be a very difficult situation.”
“I should have done better.” The truth slayed him. Worse, he wasn’t sure if he could do better. He could only try.
“I think you’ve done all right.” Not a hint of judgment, just a steady reassurance radiating from her as if she truly believed it. “All anyone can do is their best. No one is perfect, so you just have to forgive yourself for where you feel you fell short, learn from it if you can and move on. Just keep doing your best.”
“That’s the secret to your success?” He’d meant to lighten the mood, but humor didn’t make an appearance. Instead, the walls he had lowered tumbled down more, leaving him undefended. There was no way to stop the surge of affection he didn’t want to feel. Affection, not gratitude. He would be happy with gratitude, he would feel safe with gratitude, but that was not the emotion coming to life within him.
“Trust me, I’m not so successful. Not personally, anyway. I handle everything by denial. It works, but nothing gets resolved.” Amused, she shook her head at her shortcomings and took another sip of coffee.
Both girls slunk into sight weighed down with an armload of books. Jenny led the way to the table, where she shifted her armful to show off the titles. “See what we found?”
“Ooh, some good ones.” Cheyenne tilted to the side to get a good look and tapped on one of the book spines. “My all-time favorite. I can’t believe you haven’t read Black Beauty. It’s so good, maybe I should pull it off my bookshelf at home and read it again.”
“Okay. We can read it at the same time.” Julianna plopped her half dozen titles on the table, happy with her finds. “See why I really need a phone, Dad? A pink one.”
“I don’t need reminding.” He pulled out some money and handed it to Jenny. “Go get these books paid for so Cheyenne can get on with her day. We’ve inconvenienced her enough.”
“I’m so inconvenienced. Not.” Cheyenne gave both girls a hug. It was hard not to adore them. She grabbed her handbag and the romance she’d set on the table. “Let’s find the checkout line.”
Julianna gathered up her books and Jenny led the way around the tables. Cheyenne couldn’t stop the feeling that she was leaving something important behind but when she checked. She had everything she came with—her purse was hanging from her shoulder, her phone was in her pocket and still she couldn’t explain the sense of loss as she followed the girls.
It couldn’t be because she was leaving Adam behind, she told herself, denying her feelings again. When she glanced over her shoulder, Adam watched her, smiling. She was no longer sure if her denial was strong enough to explain away the sweet pops of sensation fizzing like soda in her stomach.
Adam drained the last swallows of his coffee, standing near the door. He had a perfect view of the girls at the long front counter, Jenny standing on tiptoe to count out the bills while Julianna clung to Cheyenne’s side, chattering throughout her transaction. His guard was down, the woman had rendered it useless. Instead of feeling exposed, he felt calm. Relaxed. As if his life were in perfect order when it wasn’t. Cheyenne had done this to him, Cheyenne and her cheerful ease and inviting compassion. She had led him unwittingly right where he’d vowed not to be.
I can’t be falling for her. The thought should have sent panic zinging through his bloodstream, but it didn’t. He tossed the empty cup into a trash cylinder, captured by the way Cheyenne chatted with Julianna and the clerk, bowed her head to scrawl her signature on the electronic screen, tucked her charge card into her designer bag and took the sack with a graceful, sleek movement of her slender hand.
The sun chose that moment to brighten, casting an ethereal haze into the store. The woman had never looked more radiant, as if lit from within. She wore nothing elegant, just a light yellow T advertising a brand of horse feed, denim shorts and sandals, but she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, captivating him with such force the entire world vanished. All he saw was her striding toward him, sandwiched between his little girls. His heart fell in one long plummeting swoop he could not stop tumbling without end.
He couldn’t let it show. The girls could not know. The last thing he wanted was for anyone, especially Cheyenne, to guess. He squared his shoulders as she approached and hoped his voice came out normal. “All set?”
“I am, but your wallet might never be the same.” She put an arm around each girl, who carried two big bags of books. “The upside is your girls will be very horse knowledgeable.”
“Just what I was hoping for.” His dry tone earned him a smile and her dimples made an appearance.
Breathtaking.
The key was to keep the wobble out of his voice and to hide the hitch in his step as he held the door. She swept past him, unaware of what she’d done. The day was already oven hot and the parking lot radiated heat waves.
The girls skipped ahead, making plans, their chatter as blissful as lark song. He could barely put one foot in front of the other, and he lingered back with Cheyenne. She hesitated in the parking lot, her keys in hand. Sunlight burnished her hair, bringing out highlights of copper and gold. He managed to hit his key fob, the sedan’s locks clicked open and the trunk popped.
The scariest thing of all was that he wasn’t afraid, and he should have been. He wanted to absorb the music of Cheyenne’s laughter and the alto notes of her voice. He wanted to keep
her in his sight, to savor the endearing slope of her nose, to memorize the rosebud shape of her lips and to keep falling into her blue eyes.
“Dad, here.” Julianna thrust her package at him. He fumbled but didn’t drop the bag. He took Jenny’s, too, leaving the girls to chat while he deposited their purchases into the trunk. Cheyenne’s gaze caught his and she shook her head, rolling her eyes as if to say, “Glad to see you are good for something.”
He shrugged, unable to argue with that. When he wanted to be near to her, he kept his distance. He shut the trunk, opened the doors and shaded his eyes with one hand. “Come, girls. Cheyenne has things to do.”
“What things?” Jenny asked. “Are you going shopping?”
“Sort of. I’ll tell you about it later. Promise.” She backed away across the lot, glancing over her shoulder to check for traffic that wasn’t there. The wind rustled and she caught her hair before it fluttered across her face. He wanted to brush those strands away, any excuse to pull her close.
His arms had never felt this empty as he watched her wave goodbye. It was a good thing she was leaving. He needed time away to regroup, figure out how to stop his feelings and reverse them. He did not want to love anyone again.
“Cheyenne is so great.” Julianna slid onto the backseat.
“Totally,” Jenny agreed as she twisted to watch Cheyenne’s truck pull out of the spot directly behind them, one row over.
He dropped behind the wheel, sparing a wave as she rumbled by. Her window whizzed down and her heart-shaped face could not have looked more dear as she winked at him.
“See you all later!” A threat more than a promise, mischief flashing in her dream-blue eyes.
“Bye, Cheyenne!” Jenny hollered out the window.
“Bye!” Julianna chorused.
The truck’s horn gave a light toot, the engine purred as she drove away and he felt a kerplunk dead center in his chest. Undoubtedly the complete loss of his heart. He buckled up and put the car in gear, not at all sure what he was going to do about that.