by Martina Cole
‘Do they know what caused it?’
‘Yes. He had a coronary. He’s never been ill in his life.’
‘We would have been here sooner but we was out all day. You should have rung one of the other boys, not Janine. They’ll be here soon.’
He was going to murder that drunken bitch when he got home. His father ill in hospital and she’d left a message at the club for him to call! Not even telling Gerry Jackson what it was all about.
‘I was too scared to call anyone. I didn’t want to leave your father. Look at him. He looks terrible.’
She sounded so old that Maura and Roy were suddenly reminded of the fact that their parents could die soon. That their father could be dying now.
Roy sat his mother in the chair by the bed then looked at his father’s wasted body.
‘I’m going to find a doctor. Maws. Look after Muvver. I’ll find out what’s going on.’
Maura automatically put her arm around the woman she had hardly spoken to for years. Both forgot their animosity in the light of Benjamin’s illness. They were just a mother and daughter, united in their grief.
‘Everything will be all right, Mum . . . I promise you.’
Sarah held Maura’s hand in her own.
‘Oh, Maws, he’s so ill. What will I do without him?’
‘Don’t you worry, Mum, he’ll be all right.’ Maura’s voice sounded much more confident than she felt.
Leslie, Garry and Lee turned up a little while later. All were sober, looking worried about their father.
Maura and Sarah stood by Benjamin’s bed, the two women supporting each other as best they could. It was too soon after Michael’s and Geoffrey’s deaths to face another one. Though they had all treated Benjamin with scant respect and only haphazard affection over the years, now he lay ill they were all reminded of the fact that he was their father. Even a bad parent was entitled to respect on his death bed.
Carla rushed into the hospital at ten-thirty. Her long red-brown hair was blown all over the place and she had on an old coat. Even untidy, she looked lovely. She went straight to Roy. Her father held her while she cried. She was the living image of Janine, and for a second he remembered the vital woman he had married.
‘How’s Grandad Ryan? I was out all day with Joey. I only got the message when I came home.’
‘He’s very ill, Carla. But they think he could pull through.’
‘Come on, Carla. Sit here beside me.’
Garry’s voice was soft. Carla was like the family mascot. She sat down in the chair and he gave her a cup of coffee. Inside the room Maura and Sarah stood either side of Benjamin’s bed. At ten-forty-two he opened his eyes and looked at them.
‘Me two best girls. I suppose I’ve missed the pub?’
Looking at their anxious faces, he tried to grin.
Sarah and Maura laughed through their tears.
‘Yes, Dad, you missed the pub.’
‘Remember what I’ve always said . . . when I die, I want me ashes put in the Bramley Arms.’ He closed his eyes.
Maura and Sarah finished the sentence for him: ‘So you’ll always be there for opening time.’
It was a saying of his they had heard all their lives.
‘That’s it, girls. I think I’ll have another sleep now.’
He closed his eyes. When he was asleep the two women hugged one another.
‘I reckon he’ll be all right now, Mum.’
The nurse who was in the room and heard the exchange smiled at them.
‘Why don’t you all get home and get some rest? He’s stable now.’
‘Come on, Mum. I’ll run you home.’
‘No, I can’t stay in that house on me own. I’ve never spent a night there alone since before the war.’
Maura could hear the fear in her mother’s voice. ‘I’ll stay there with you. Don’t worry. Come on, let’s get you home.’
Both women kissed Benjamin and left the room.
Maura drove Sarah home a little later, amazed at the way events had brought them together as Michael had wanted.
‘Sleep in my bed with me, Maws.’
‘All right then, Mum.’ They went up to the bedroom, both quiet and sad.
As they undressed they were both aware of the truce that had been drawn up between them. Maura knew that for the first time in years her mother needed her. She was sorry that it had taken her father’s near death to achieve it.
Sarah got into her bed and watched Maura folding her clothes. She looked at her daughter’s unblemished body and beautiful profile. She would have been a fit mate for that Terry Petherick. He was one of the few men she had seen who towered over her daughter. Maura took off her bra and Sarah looked at her large firm breasts and pulled her eyes away quickly, feeling that spark of jealousy many women feel when they see their daughters’ strong, taut bodies. Maura slipped into the bed beside her mother, feeling strange at the turn of events. She had rung William earlier and told him what had happened, and that she was staying the night with her mother. She knew he was miffed as he wanted her with him. They were now a real couple, making plans with each other. She had decided to give herself to him as he wanted her too. Seriously and for always.
‘I’m frightened, Maws.’ Sarah’s voice sounded hopelessly old and tired. Maura patted her hand.
‘He’ll be fine, Mum.’
‘I was eighteen when I married your father. My father, God rest him, had gone around to Ben’s house and given him the hiding of his life. Then he had arranged the wedding. That was over fifty years ago now. And Michael had been that child. My first born son. 1935 that was. Then I had child after child. Your father. He used to joke that he only had to walk past me to get pregnant. You were me last one. Me daughter for me old age. I never really loved your father, you know, but when you spend all that time with someone, it’s hard to imagine being without them. Even when they’re a waster, like your father.’
‘I can understand that, Mum. It’s a long time.’
‘It’s good of you to stay with me, Maws. I know we haven’t exactly seen eye to eye.’
‘Look, forget that, Mum,’ Maura interrupted her mother. ‘We’re together now. That’s all that matters. That’s what families are all about. Pulling together in the bad times and sharing the good.’
Not that we ever did that, Maura thought to herself.
Sarah stared into Maura’s face. In the light of the bedside lamps, she looked very young and Sarah was reminded that she was the tool that was going to destroy her daughter. Whatever happened she was going to have to do that. Maura smiled at her sadly.
‘Do you remember when I was a kid and I used to sleep with you when the old man was in prison? We used to have chats. That’s what you always used to call them . . . chats. I wish we could turn the clock back to those days. Be like we were then.’
‘So do I. But nothing can ever be the same as it was.’ Sarah sounded as if she was holding back tears and Maura assumed they were for her father. She never dreamt they could be for her.
‘I wish I had kept my baby, Mum. I still think about it sometimes.’ Maura’s voice was wistful.
‘I wish you’d kept it and all. I wish I’d never taken you to that flat in Peckham.’
‘That’s all water under the bridge now, Mum. I went of my own accord.’
‘No, Maws, it was me. I was scared that you’d be tied to someone you didn’t love, like I was. Then, when I met Terry . . .’
‘You met him? When?’ Maura’s voice was sharp, and Sarah realised her mistake.
‘Oh, it was at the funeral. Michael’s funeral. I spoke to him there.’
Maura relaxed. ‘Oh, then. Yeah, our Garry had a go at him.’
Sarah swallowed deeply.
‘I know. I was watching. Along with many other people.’
They were quiet for a while, both occupied with their own thoughts. Then Maura spoke softly.
‘Look, Mum, let’s just concentrate on getting me dad out of hospital and back
home. Everything else is done. Over with.’
She nearly told her mother about William Templeton but stopped herself. She knew that her mother didn’t really like him.
‘Mum?’ Maura’s voice was quiet.
‘Yes.’
‘You don’t regret having all us kids, do you?’ Suddenly it was important that she knew the answer.
Sarah was silent for a while before answering.
‘Of course not, Maws.’
As she spoke, she asked God to forgive her for lying.
Chapter Thirty-three
February 1987
Leslie and Garry were collecting the protection money. As they pulled up outside a Greek restaurant in Ilford, Garry noticed a blue Granada parked a few cars away from them.
‘Les . . . see that blue Granny? I’m sure it’s been following us.’
Leslie looked at the car.
‘I haven’t noticed it.’
Garry got out and walked to the Granada. He tapped on the window. As it opened he leant down and looked into the car.
‘What you doin’ here?’
The blond man inside looked puzzled.
‘I beg your pardon?’
‘I said . . . what you doin’ here?’
‘I’ve come to have a meal in the restaurant. Why?’
‘Nothing.’
Garry walked away from the car, still not sure what was going on. He got back in his own car beside Leslie.
‘Let’s sit here a minute and see if that bloke goes in the restaurant.’ Sure enough, the man got out of his car and locked it up. Then he went into the restaurant.
‘You wait here, Les.’
‘OK.’
Garry went into the restaurant. The man from the Granada was studying a menu. Leslie walked through to the kitchen, picked up the envelope with the ‘rent’ in and walked back out again. As he passed the man’s table he said, ‘Have a nice meal.’
The blond man watched him leave. After a quick moussaka and a brandy, he paid his bill and left. He drove to the nearest phone box. He had to let Marsh know that Garry Ryan had tumbled him.
Maura and William were visiting Benjamin. He had been home from the hospital for ten days and was not taking kindly to his new regime. Not drinking, no smoking, no fats.
‘Seems bloody silly living if you can’t enjoy yourself.’
William smiled.
‘Really, Mr Ryan, once you get used to the changes they won’t seem so bad.’
‘I dunno about that. It’s easy for you to say, ain’t it? You ain’t been told you can’t enjoy yourself no more.’
William shook his head. Benjamin Ryan was not only ignorant but stubborn. He had absolutely refused to conform to any advice that the doctors had given him.
‘Nuffink but a load of bleeding foreigners. Can’t understand half of wot they’re waffling about. Bloody macaroons, eye ties and sodding krauts telling me wot to do!’
Maura laughed.
‘Oh, Dad, Doctor Hummelbrunner isn’t German. He’s Austrian.’
‘All the bleeding same if you asks me.’
‘Leave him, Maura. I’ll make sure he follows the doctor’s orders. Now shut your trap, Benjamin Ryan, when we’ve got visitors. Would you like another cup of tea, Lord William?’
‘I really wish you wouldn’t call me that, Mrs Ryan. Willy will be quite adequate.’
Sarah smiled uneasily. She didn’t like having a lord in her house. It made her uncomfortable. Where her daughter was concerned, there seemed to be nothing but trouble. Sarah had read about this Templeton in Geoffrey’s papers. He was a villain. Only in Sarah’s eyes he was worse than her children, because he had been given a good start in life which was more than her brood had ever had. It wasn’t right . . .
Sarah was beginning to regret her newfound friendship with her daughter. She should have kept it as it was. Kept her away from the house. The trouble being she was the apple of her father’s eye. She waited every day for that Petherick to call her about the papers she had given him and up till now she had heard nothing. She was beginning to wonder if she had done the right thing.
‘You all right, Mum?’
Sarah looked at Maura.
‘Tired, Maws, that’s all. I think you two had better make a move in a minute. I want to settle your father for a nap.’
‘Okey doke. I’ve got to meet Leslie and Garry anyway.’
William Templeton got up and placed his cup and saucer on the coffee table.
Maura went to the bed that had been put in the lounge and kissed her father goodbye.
‘Take it easy, Dad, and do what Mum tells you.’
‘I will, girl. See you tomorrow then.’
‘Goodbye, Mr Ryan.’
‘Tata, son. See you again.’ He winked at William. ‘Bring me a medicinal brandy next time.’
‘Oh, Dad. Give it a rest, will you!’
When Maura and William had left Sarah settled Benjamin for his nap. ‘Our Maura’s done well for herself there, Sar. Looks like he’s got a couple of bob.’
‘Well, money isn’t everything and I don’t think our Maura’s exactly hard up.’
Benjamin caught hold of her hand. ‘I never give you much, did I, gel?’
She looked into his rheumy eyes.
‘Well, you did your best. Now try and get yourself off to sleep. I’ll call you at nine o’clock for your tablets and we’ll watch a bit of telly. How’s that?’
‘All right, love.’
Sarah collected the used cups together and carried them out to the kitchen. As she filled the sink with hot water she looked around her, remembering the cockroaches, the empty bellies, and the years of hardship she had experienced within these walls. And she remembered Maura with her long blond hair flying behind her as she played out in the street . . . Leslie’s permanently running nose. ‘Silversleeves’ the others had called him . . . She could almost hear Mickey’s voice floating up from the basement . . .
She turned off the tap and began to wash up. In her mind’s eye she could see Geoffrey on the day Maura had made her first Holy Communion. Geoffrey had been so proud of her. All the boys had been scrubbed up and taken to the church. Garry and Lee had been irritating her all that morning. Geoffrey had thumped the pair of them. She had felt so proud of them that day. She had walked, head high, with her nine children all clean and shining.
She smiled to herself. If only you had an idea what was in store for your children! All those years ago she had thought Maura would grow up, marry, and give her grandchildren. Instead, she had grown up and done the complete opposite. First thing in the morning she would phone that Petherick and see what was going on. If she had to wait much longer she’d have a heart attack herself! Once Maura was arrested she would be able to breathe freely. Whatever happened, she had to get her away from the boys. Benjamin’s heart attack had shown her that they weren’t getting any younger. If she was to sort her family out before she herself died, she had to do it now.
Maura and William were in Le Buxom by ten o’clock. Gerry Jackson had been in the act of throwing out a prominent Member of Parliament who had a penchant for trying to dance with the strippers when Roy had arrived. Recognising the man, Roy had taken him down to the restaurant to try to sober him up before the place got packed. He left him with one of the waitresses and went back into the club.
‘That old bastard gets worse, Gerry.’
He nodded.
‘He gets on my bloody nerves. He’ll be on telly tomorrow or the next day telling everyone to listen to their consciences and vote for the Tory Party.’
‘Mickey had the right idea, you know. He used to keep records on all the prominent citizens and use them to his advantage.’
‘Yeah, I know. The West End’s full of bloody Arabs at the moment. That’ll cause hag, it always does. They won’t go near the black birds and so the blondes will be “going case” two or three times a night, which means permanent bitching. By the way, that coon Rubber was in here earlier, selling coke. I
slung him out but I thought I’d let you know. All the hostesses are as high as kites.’
‘Thanks for telling me, Ger. That’s all we need. Well, keep your eye on them. I don’t want them fighting with the punters. They can do what they like to one another.’
Roy went back up to the offices to see Maura.
‘All right, Roy?’
‘Yeah, not too bad. We’ve got the Right Honourable Dickhead in again tonight and that bloody Rubber’s been in and sold the hostesses coke. Other than that, everything’s fine!’
Maura laughed.
‘Send Leslie round to have a word with him. I heard through the grapevine he got a good hiding outside the Pink Pussycat last week for selling bad stuff. Tell Leslie to make it plain that this is his last warning. I don’t want this place raided for drugs.’
‘Okey doke. Leslie and Garry are due in shortly anyway. Actually, Garry rang in earlier. Reckons he was being followed by a bloke in a blue Granada.’
Maura rolled her eyes to the ceiling and took a deep breath. ‘I don’t believe him! He is so paranoid it’s a joke!’
William Templeton looked at her, puzzled. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Oh, Will, it would take all night to explain it.’
Roy started to chuckle.
‘He thinks that he’s being followed all the time. We all wind him up about it. He’s really paranoid.’
‘Has he always been like this?’
‘Since he was a kid. He told me once that when he gets really wound up he hears voices!’ Roy laughed.
‘Good God!’
Maura put her hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles. ‘No, not God . . . more like the devil!’
William smiled but in fact he was disturbed.
‘What did you say to him?’
‘Not a lot, Maws, just the usual. That I’d phone around the Bill shops and see if they had any information. I’ll tell him later it was just a mistake on his part.’
‘Good. Humour him. That’s the best way.’
‘If you want to shoot off, Maws, I’ll pick up the rents. I’m staying on here for a while anyway.’
‘Thanks, Roy. That would be great. Once Les has been sent to sort out Rubber, would you ask him to pick up some parcels for me? The addresses are on this piece of paper.