The Sophomore

by Monica Murphy

  “That was almost embarrassingly fast,” he says after he’s found his voice.

  “Mmm. I didn’t mind.” I snuggle closer, but he gently pushes me away, getting up so he can dispose of the condom. When he comes back into the bedroom, I’m already sitting up, the sheets falling to my waist, exposing my upper body to him. Of course his gaze drops to my chest, lingering there. “I want to get on the pill before we leave.”

  He raises a brow. “Really?”

  I nod, bringing my knees up to my chest and hugging them to me. “I’m tired of condoms.”

  Jackson grins. “Me too.”

  “We should get rid of them for good.”

  “I agree.” His smile fades. “I’ve never had sex without one before.”

  “That’s reassuring,” I tease him.

  “You trust me? Is that what you’re saying?” he asks as he comes back to the bed and climbs beneath the covers, pulling me to him.

  “I trust you. I’ve always trusted you.” I kiss his jaw. His chin. His lips. “I love you, Jackson.”

  “I love you too, baby. You and me? We’re going to conquer the world together,” he says with all that Jackson Rivers’ confidence I love.

  “We are,” I agree, settling in next to him.

  Right where I belong.

  Epilogue

  Jackson

  Summer

  Adrenaline races through my veins as I stand on the sidelines of the stage, listening to the crowd. They’re chanting my name over and over again, wanting me to come back out and perform one last time for them. Some of them sound desperate, high-pitched female voices yelling, “Jackson, please!”

  Ellie always tells me she can feel their pain. She knows what that’s like, wishing I would notice her. Really notice her. And I tell her what I say in the song that I wrote just for her. The one that’s currently racing up the Billboard charts, which is fucking unbelievable. “Pink” did well, but “I See You” is already doing better. Rick swears it’s going to outperform the first single.

  He says it’s going to hit number one.

  “They want you,” Ellie says, sliding her hand into mine. This is our ritual. One we started early on in the tour. Now it’s late August. She says this to me every time they’re out there chanting my name and we’re backstage, tucked in close together.

  She supports me. Loves me. Encourages me. And I do the same for her. At the beginning of the summer, she started a YouTube channel about our travels and exploits, and she’s gained lots of followers fast. Rick wasn’t thrilled I was bringing my girlfriend on tour at first, but now he loves it. He loves all the attention Ellie’s social media brings to us, to me. She’s completely blown up. She even has sponsors now.

  It’s fucking wild. Our lives have taken a total turn, and it’s amazing.

  I couldn’t do any of this without her.

  “Do you want me?” I ask. This is also part of our ritual. I know what her answer is going to be. It never wavers.

  “More than you’ll ever know.” She tugs on my hand, pulling me down to kiss her lips. I linger there, drinking from her, not wanting to stop, but she gently pushes me, giving me no choice.

  “Go out there. Show them what you’ve got,” she murmurs.

  I lift my brows. That line is new. Usually she says, Go out there. Show them that you’re mine.

  She smiles serenely, making me think of a queen. She’s transformed this summer. I love the woman she’s becoming. “You don’t belong to just me anymore, Jackson. You belong to all of them too.”

  Ellie points at the screaming crowd.

  “Not true—” I start, but she shakes her head.

  “It’s okay. They can have a piece of you, but not all of you,” she says. “I’m the one who’s in your bed every night. That’s all that matters to me.”

  Ah fuck. This girl. Her confidence in herself and me is astounding. She’s changed so much. All for the better. I’m in awe of her.

  “Love you.” I kiss her again. “I’m gonna go make girls cry now.”

  She giggles. “Have fun.”

  I run back out on stage, my bandmates following after me. The crowd roars their approval as I sling my guitar strap around my neck and approach the mic, strumming the guitar a couple of times to tune it. I stand there, quiet, surveying the audience and how deep it goes. How many people came out tonight to support me. To listen to my songs. They grow with every venue, I swear. This venue is outside, so there are a ton of people here. I see more male faces than usual out there, which is surprising.

  Not that I don’t appreciate my female fans, but I don’t want to be labeled as a teen heartthrob and that’s it. Though Rick tells me there’s worse things that could happen to my career.

  I suppose he’s right.

  Once the crowd is mostly silent, I start to play, my acoustic guitar so much softer than the electric guitar, of course. I don’t play acoustic nearly as much as I used to, and I miss it. Miss my fucking chair too. It was part of my schtick, but Rick told me I needed to try something new, so here I am.

  Standing. Smiling out at the crowd before I speak.

  “This song is for my girl,” I say, my voice husky. I glance to my right to see Ellie standing in the wings, a giant smile on her face as she watches me. “She’s the love of my life. And she better never forget it.”

  The crowd goes nuts. Ellie mouths I love you to me. Her words are like an adrenaline shot straight to the heart.

  Damaged. Broken. Blind and stupid

  Looking for girls. Losing myself. Drinking too much

  Finding happiness in things that don’t matter

  Yet there you stood, always by my side. Never wavering

  How much did you endure while I was fucking around?

  Yet you never left me, yeah you stood your ground

  I strum the guitar, tapping my foot, thinking of that night, and how I started writing this song while she was being attacked. And how far we’ve come since then.

  When it’s dark and cold, and you’re feeling lonely just know

  I see you

  When we’re miles apart you’ve still got a piece of my heart

  Yeah

  I see you

  Even before when I took advantage of your faith in me

  I saw you

  And now we’re together, we’re so much in love, you always know

  I see you

  I see you

  The crowd in front of the stage is swaying back and forth, singing along. I start playing with them, not saying the words but they always scream them back to me, loud and clear.

  I see you

  I see you

  I finish the song, overwhelmed with emotion, which is my usual state lately. I feel like a giant baby, which is not normal. But I’m embracing it, because fuck, I’m feeling everything, and it’s so damn good. I didn’t know my life could be like this, and it’s all thanks to my girl.

  My Ellie.

  She changed me in so many ways. I was running away from my feelings because they scared me. Ellie made me see that. A relationship doesn’t destroy you. If you’re in the right one, with someone you love and who supports you, it lifts you up.

  It makes you a better person.

  That’s what Ellie has done for me.

  I start to wrap up the song and I glance her way, waving my hand toward her, beckoning her onstage. Her eyes go wide and she shakes her head, but I keep waving at her, mouthing to her come here.

  She walks on stage, slowly approaching me, looking so incredibly nervous. But she’s got nothing to fear. The crowd starts screaming. Some of them say her name, which startles her. Of course, they know who she is. We’re a package deal.

  The moment she’s close, I launch into a repeat of the chorus, wanting to say the words directly to her. Wanting everyone to see how much this girl means to me.

  How much I love her.

  “And now we’re together, we’re so much in love, and you always know. I see you,” I tell her, not even si
nging anymore. I stop playing the guitar, too caught up in the shine of unshed tears in her eyes. “I see you. I love you, baby.”

  Swear to God, a collective sigh rises from the crowd.

  Just as I end the song for good.

  And kiss her.

  Thank you so much for reading Jackson and Ellie’s story! Want a sneak peek of The Junior? Keep reading for more!

  The Junior Sneak Peek

  Prologue

  I watch her enter the coffeeshop, her gaze searching the room before it lands on me. Her smile is faint, and it’s not fake, thank God. I know we haven’t always gotten along.

  Wait, scratch that. It’s not that we don’t get along. It’s more that we’ve always been wary of each other, thanks to him.

  Stupid, frustrating Caleb.

  She approaches the table I’m sitting at, that faint smile on her face, though I can tell she’s nervous. Unsure. I explained nothing when I said I wanted to meet with her, and she’s probably afraid I’m going to drop some outrageous verbal bomb on her.

  That’s not my plan. It never has been. I’m just trying to clear the air. And I’m trying to figure out what she wants.

  Clutching my iced coffee in my hand to stop my fingers from shaking, I smile up at her. “Hey. You’re early.”

  “Hi. So are you,” she returns.

  “I wanted to make sure I got a table for us,” I admit, glancing around the crowded café. “Are you going to order anything?”

  “Oh,” I suppose I should.” She glances over at the counter, where a small line has formed. “I’ll be right back.”

  This gives me time to think about what I want to say. As if I haven’t pondered it enough. Ever since I reached out via text to her a few days ago, this is pretty much all I’ve thought about it. Which is so unlike me.

  After much consideration, I finally banished him from my life over winter break. Mom always said winter break is where relationships go to die, but she was referring to high school. I don’t know how many relationships I witnessed end over winter break. More than I can count, and a few that included me.

  The theory also applies to college.

  I can’t deny it’s been tough, not seeing him anymore. And of course, when you banish someone, you see them everywhere. Or there are reminders of them everywhere you look, which is frustrating.

  Can’t help but also take it as a sign. I’m a big believer in them.

  Signs.

  Within minutes she’s returned to the table, an iced coffee in her hand, and she settles into the chair across from me, taking a sip before she sets it on the table in between us. I take her in, admiring her beauty, her pretty hair, her sparkling eyes. Even full of wariness, they still sparkle. I can see why he’s attracted to her. How he hasn’t been able to quit her.

  “Can I admit something?” she asks.

  I nod. “Please.”

  “I was surprised to get your text. We haven’t seen each other in—a while. I thought you were mad at me,” she admits.

  A sigh leaves me. “I have no reason to be mad at you. I never did. You though, definitely have more reason.”

  She shakes her head. “No, that’s not true. Didn’t you hear?”

  I frown, watching as she takes a big sip from her straw. Like she needs the coffee to continue speaking. “Hear what?”

  “We’re done. Through. For good.” Her expression turns sheepish. “I know you cut him out of your life too last year, and I admired you for being so strong. I decided to do the same thing.”

  “You did?” I’m surprised. Now it’s my turn to take a drink before I say something awkward or dumb.

  She nods. “It was so hard, but after going a solid month without him texting me or seeing him, I realized I felt…free. Now I barely think about him anymore.”

  “It’s been a long time,” I say softly.

  “Years. For the both of us,” she agrees.

  Such a tease, am I right? Don’t worry, The Junior is coming September 9th!

  Playlist

  “Rockstar Knights (with Tripple Redd)” -

  Kid Cudi, Tripple Redd

  “notice me (feat. BENEE)” - ROLE MODEL, BENEE

  “affection” - BETWEEN FRIENDS

  “telepatia” - Kali Uchis

  “WHY AREN’T WE HAVING SEX?” -

  Liza Owen

  “Pink + White” - Frank Ocean

  “blushing!” - BETWEEN FRIENDS

  “Kiss U Right Now” - Duckwrth

  “Vultures - Live at the House of Blues, Chicago” - John Mayer

  Find the rest of The Sophmore playlist here: https://spoti.fi/3fGY64d

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  Dear Readers,

  I hope you enjoyed THE SOPHOMORE! If you haven’t already, please sign up for my newsletter so you can stay up to date on my latest book news. Plus, you’ll get a FREE book by me, just for signing up! Click below:

  Monica Murphy’s Newsletter

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  Acknowledgements

  It was a true joy to write Jackson and Ellie’s story, though the music lyrics tripped me up some. I don’t consider myself poetic, so I had to channel my inner Drew Callahan (if you read One Week Girlfriend, etc. you know what I’m talking about) to come up with (hopefully) passable lyrics. I hope you enjoyed reading this book as much as I enjoyed writing it. Their story was a long time coming.

  I want to thank everyone at Valentine PR, including my precious Nina and the rest of the gang. You all make my life a lot easier. I also want to thank Michelle Lancaster for the fabulous photo of Lochie (he is such a great Jackson!) and Hang Le for the magnificent cover. Thank you to Rebecca and Sarah for slapping my book into shape, as well as Brittany for the excellent beta read and notes. You are all the BEST.

  And as always, thank you to the readers, bloggers, reviewers, etc. who read my books and share them everywhere. I seriously cannot do this job with you!

  p.s. - If you enjoyed this book, I would greatly appreciate it if you left a review on the retailer site you bought it from, or on Goodreads. Thank you so much!

  Also by Monica Murphy

  Standalone

  Things I Wanted To Say (but never did)

  College Years

  The Freshman

  The Sophomore

  The Junior

  The Senior

  Dating Series

  Save The Date

  Fake Date

  Holidate

  Hate to Date You

  Rate A Date

  Wedding Date

  Coming 10/19!

  Blind Date

  The Callahans

  Close to Me

  Falling For Her

  Addicted To Him

  Meant To Be

  Coming 2/10/21!

  Making Her Mine

  Forever Yours Series

  You Promised Me Forever

  Thinking About You

  Nothing Without You

  Damaged Hearts Series

  Her Defiant Heart

  His Wasted Heart

  Damaged Hearts

  Friends Series

  Just Friends

  More Than Friends

  Forever

  The Never Duet

  Never Tear Us Apart

  Never Let You Go

  The Rules Series

  Fair Game

  In The Dark

  Slow Play

  Safe Bet

  The Fowler Sisters Series

  Owning Violet

  Stealing Rose

  Taming Lily

  Reverie Series

  His Reverie

  Her Destiny

  Billionaire Bachelors Club Series

  Crave

  Torn

  Savor

  Intoxicated

  One Week Girlfriend Series

  O
ne Week Girlfriend

  Second Chance Boyfriend

  Three Broken Promises

  Drew + Fable Forever

  Four Years Later

  Five Days Until You

  A Drew + Fable Christmas

  Standalone YA Titles

  Daring The Bad Boy

  Saving It

  Pretty Dead Girls

  About the Author

  Monica Murphy is a New York Times, USA Today and international bestselling author. Her books have been translated in almost a dozen languages and has sold over two million copies worldwide. Both a traditionally published and independently published author, she writes young adult and new adult romance, as well as contemporary romance and women’s fiction. She’s also known as USA Today bestselling author Karen Erickson.

  Copyright © 2021 by Monica Murphy

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales, is entirely coincidental.