Ladies,
Hope you’re ready for a swim! Today, you will all put on your best swimwear and participate in a poolside swimsuit contest next to the Great Pool at nine AM. One woman will be the winner of the competition and win the exclusive Jungle Date for the evening, and two women will go home.
Holy shit. The competition was getting fierce. Two women were going to go home? That meant that out of the nine ladies left, it would leave only seven. That was five less women than they’d started with, and they’d only been in Bali just a few days.
She thought that the cuts were going to take much longer than that. But it looked like the producers were trying to whittle down the women into a smaller core group, maybe so that they could get some better camera time with the leading ladies. Which she didn’t mind one bit.
The fewer women that there were to chatter, giggle, and gossip, the more attention that would be on her. And the more free time that Ky would have to get to know her even better, hopefully on the exclusive Jungle Date that night.
She heard the rest of the women coming before she saw them. Both Sarahs, Kendra, Lindsay, and Brinkley scampered up the stone path that led from the cabin suites to the Great Pool. It sounded like Kendra was telling a hilarious story about one thing or another. All the ladies were laughing hysterically at a joke she had made.
Harper sank back to recline on the poolside lounger. (They didn’t call it a lounger for nothing, right?) She wanted to make sure that all the women and Ky got the perfect view of her tanned, toned physique with zero body fat as they made their way to the Great Pool.
There was nothing like a little intimidation to put the women in check. And Ky would appreciate what he saw, if he was like every other red-blooded man in America. That ought to get his blood pumping.
The women entered the gate of the pool area and approached her on her makeshift throne. She held the small silver card in the air as if she’d won a gold medal in the Olympics. Close enough. Once the other women recognized what she was holding, they were all over her.
Lindsay tried to grab the card out of her hand. The nerve of that girl. She scooted back even further on her lounger and said in a loud voice, “Good morning, ladies. Why don’t I read the card to you?”
She reread the message in the card. She paused to emphasize swimsuit contest since that was sure to upset Brinkley, what with all of her Midwestern values and Presbyterian charm. Sure enough, Brinkley’s eyes widened as she read aloud.
“Um, what do you think they mean by swimsuit competition?” Brinkley squeaked.
“I’m pretty sure it’s self-explanatory. We’re all going to be wearing our swimsuits to compete to see who looks the best in next to nothing,” Harper shot back.
She was trying not to be downright rude to any of the women, but it was hard to be nice to Brinkley. She was so sweet, so innocent, and so naïve that it was almost enough to make you sick.
Cori and Morgan, the stragglers of the group, made their way down to the pool a few minutes later. Harper once again had the great pleasure of reading the card aloud to the women and gauging their reactions. Morgan seemed unperturbed. It figured. She’d probably had an amazing date with Ky and was feeling pretty confident.
Harper wished that she’d had a little less to drink the night before so that she could have spied on Morgan’s suite to see what time she got home. That information in itself would have been pure gold. She didn’t think it would happen that soon, but there was always the possibility that Morgan could have stayed overnight with Ky. But that was pretty unlikely.
After all, why would he choose Morgan out of all the women there, over her, to stay the night with on the first big date of the show? Harper pushed that toxic thought out of her head.
She knew that it was bad energy to dwell on the negative, or at least that was what an astrologer on Ventura Boulevard had told her, so she focused on the positive. What was happening right in front of her. A cutthroat swimsuit competition that she was guaranteed to win.
There was only the small matter of her not-so-ample chest to think about. But the good news was that her Dolce and Gabbana swimsuit put curves in all the right places. It didn’t make her look like a double D or anything; it was going to take surgery to achieve that.
But it did make her look like a full B, when she was hardly an A cup soaking wet. It had been well worth the $300 investment.
One of the many butlers that fluttered around the pool all day long clapped his hands to get the attention of the group. He explained in slow, careful English that the women were to get undressed and stand in a line, wearing only their swimsuits.
After the women were lined up in no particular order, Ky entered the gate of the Great Pool. He opened his arms wide in front of him like Moses parting the Red Sea.
“Ladies, I have never seen such a beautiful sight in my life. Every morning since I have been here, I have woken up thinking that I have got to be the luckiest man on earth to get to spend time with all of you special women. And today, I feel even luckier because I get to be your judge in the first-ever Adventure to Love swimsuit competition!”
Most of the women giggled nervously at the announcement. Harper felt like she was in her element. She tried her best to stick out her chest and her ass at the same time, which was more difficult than it seemed. She wanted to look like a hot piece of T & A, not an awkward flamingo. It took a delicate balance.
Ky was handed a clipboard by one of the butlers. He began reading a long list of official rules and regulations, as if he were the judge of the Miss America pageant. Harper didn’t catch all of the rules because she was hardly paying attention, but she did gather that they were going to be judged on poise, class, and elegance.
As if. More like, they were going to be judged on breasts, asses, and flat stomachs.
She took a look down the line of women next to her. Brinkley, Lindsay, Morgan, Samantha, Kendra, Sarah M., Sarah S., Cori, and then Harper. While it may have seemed like a losing strategy to place herself purposefully next to Cori, the exotic beauty of the group, she knew what she was doing.
Cori was breathtaking, no doubt about it. But she had clearly put much more effort into her appearance. A designer swimsuit, $1200 extensions, professional teeth whitening, MAC limited-edition makeup, and hours and hours spent at the gym each week. It was no wonder that she could barely afford her rent every month.
As for the other women, pathetic was the only word that came to mind. Brinkley looked like she was wearing her grandmother’s swimming costume from the 1950s. Lindsay had on a typical black bikini with ruffles on the top to make her chest look bigger. Morgan was going all natural and granola with some paisley bandeau top two-piece, although her body didn’t look half bad, come to think of it.
Samantha stood out because her chest was astronomically big. A little too big, if at all possible. She made a mental note to talk with her plastic surgeon after she won the show to make sure that her new breasts were big, but not so big that they looked obvious.
Kendra, always gorgeous, looked like she’d had a spray tan gone wrong. Poor girl. She must have tried to put some fake tanner on the night before and had fallen asleep. She had orange streaks all over her stomach, and her elbows and knees were two shades darker than the rest of her body. There was no hiding that.
Both Sarahs—Harper couldn’t tell them apart—were in decent physical shape. But they had that kind of athletic look that made her think they had played college volleyball or were professional swimmers or something.
They were in good shape, but they hardly had the curves that a man like Ky was looking for in a woman. What kind of man wanted to feel like he was feeling up on his little brother with the broad shoulders and six-packs those girls were sporting?
That left Cori. Radiant in a gold bikini with gold ropes snaking around her stomach. She even had a gol
d headwrap intertwined around her ice-blond, shoulder-length hair, making her look like an Icelandic warrior princess. Harper had to hand it to her. She looked good. Really good.
But she knew that she looked better. Now it was just up to Ky to confirm it by making her the winner of the competition.
Ky tapped his clipboard with his pen, deep in thought. As he marched in front of the line of women like an angry drill sergeant, the ladies were all smiles. No one wanted to be caught with a sour expression on her face, not when her fate in the competition was riding on it.
Ky finally spoke. “Ladies, this was a very difficult competition to judge. You all look absolutely beautiful in your swimsuits.” Was it her imagination, or did Ky try to catch her eye when he said that?
He continued. “But as we already know, two of you lovely women will be going home right now.”
The women gasped. Even she didn’t expect two women to be sent home immediately after the results from the competition were announced.
“And one of you beauties will be going on a date with yours truly this evening. I have to tell you again that this was a very hard decision for me to make.” Ky mimicked the women’s pained expressions.
Spit it out, she thought. She stood up straighter and waited for her name to be called. “And the winner is . . . Harper.”
Smiling weakly, Harper put her six months of acting classes to use. She feigned surprise and modesty, as if she had no clue that she would’ve been chosen as the winner of the competition. When really, she knew she had it in the bag. She accepted the tribal medallion necklace from Ky, along with a kiss on the cheek, and took her place back in line.
Now for the good part. Two more bitches—sorry, ladies—were going home right away. She couldn’t wait.
“And now for the hard part. I’m afraid that I have to say goodbye to Samantha and Sarah S. today. This was a very difficult decision for me to make, ladies. I can’t tell you how sorry I am.” Ky sighed and took a moment to say his goodbyes to the two tearful women who were cut from the competition.
God, you would have thought they were getting fired from The Apprentice. Way to turn on the waterworks.
Samantha had black streams of mascara running down her cheeks. Sarah S. was sobbing quietly and held on to Ky just a little too long when he hugged her goodbye. Both women had to be escorted away by two butlers to return to their rooms to pack and leave the resort for good.
But who cared? She had a very important date to get ready for. She looked forward to soaking in a long, luxurious bath in the double-jet Jacuzzi tub in her suite. Which hopefully she would be able to share with Ky later on when she won the competition. Things were looking up.
Ky spent the next hour chatting it up with all the women so that they didn’t feel left out after losing the swimsuit competition. Annoying. She just wanted to get the social hour over with. She wanted to get ready for her date and finally have the alone time with Ky that she deserved.
She sat back on her lounger and sipped her rum punch. She tried to rack her brain and think of all the interesting things that they could potentially do on their big date. She’d heard from Samantha who’d heard from Brinkley who’d heard from Morgan that she’d gotten to go on a hot air balloon with Ky the night before.
While a hot air balloon ride was pretty impressive, she was absolutely sure that Ky had something better prepared for their date. After all, why would he pull out all the stops for the very first date of the competition? Morgan’s date would probably pale in comparison to what Ky had planned for her that evening.
She was supposed to meet Ky in the main lobby of the hotel after she got the call from the front desk alerting her that he was ready for her. But she was running late. He was just going to have to wait. She took her time applying her lip primer, lip balm, lip plumper, lip liner, lip stain, and lip-gloss, in that order. Her lips looked . . . perfectly kissable. Just the way she liked it.
She gave herself a little kiss in the mirror and was ready to head out the door. On second thought, her earrings looked totally wrong with the Michael Kors island print maxi dress in petal pink that she was wearing.
The yellow earrings clashed big time with the pink palm tree print. She spent the next ten minutes digging through her oversized jewelry box that she had brought with her for that very reason. A girl could never be too prepared.
By the time she made it down to the lobby bar where Ky was waiting, he had three empty drinks sitting in front of him. Oops. She must’ve taken longer to accessorize than she thought. No matter. One of the best-kept secrets of her dating game was to always keep a man waiting. Then he really appreciated the time he got to spend with her.
She walked slowly to where Ky was sitting at the bar. She’d hoped he would turn his head at the sound of her heels so that she could make her slow-motion grand entrance. But no such luck. He sat slumped at the bar with his head in his hand, completely engrossed in what sounded like a very boring conversation with the bartender.
She tapped him on the shoulder. “Hey, babe! Did I keep you waiting?”
The look on his face gave her the answer. She was going to have to butter him up and get him out of this funk so that he would stop being irritated with her for making him wait. Sometimes, on very rare occasions, the “make him wait” plan backfired. It just sucked that one of those times was on camera.
She laced her fingers through Ky’s other arm that was hanging at his side. “I am so, so very sorry I kept you waiting,” she cooed into his ear.
She dropped her voice lower to a whisper. That was a great way to create instant intimacy on a date. The guy always had to lean closer to hear what she had to say.
“If you want to know the truth, I was just really nervous about this date. It took me so long to decide what to wear because I couldn’t make up my mind. I just wanted to make a good impression!”
There. She’d played the innocent, girl-next-door card. That normally got her out of trouble. Ky gave her a forced smile. He got up from his barstool and gestured to the driveway in front of the hotel. “Well, now that you’re here, we can get moving.”
Um, that was a little businesslike for a first date, wasn’t it? Ky’s mood didn’t seem to be improving. He led her to a Hummer limo waiting at the curb. He got in first. She scurried in after him before he closed the door in her face.
They sat in the limo in silence. She decided to speak first. After all, three cameramen were documenting their every move. She didn’t want to make her first date segment totally snooze-worthy for all the viewers at home, did she?
“So, can you tell me what we have in store? Or is it a sur-prise?” She giggled.
Ky replied in a flat voice, “It’s not a surprise. We’re going rock climbing.”
“Oh.”
Rock climbing? What a horrible idea for a first date! And why didn’t anyone tell her that they were going to be doing something active? She definitely wouldn’t have worn a $200 dress if that were the case. And her Miu Miu sandals were brand-new. If she scuffed them, she was going to freak. How could she put this delicately . . .?
“Oh. That sounds really interesting!” She forced a bright tone in her voice. “But I’m afraid that I didn’t bring any type of rock-climbing gear with me. So are there any other activities we could do instead? Like I said, I’m just really excited to spend time with you, no matter what we do.”
And I wouldn’t mind a hot air balloon ride, she grumbled to herself.
“I think they have rock-climbing gear and clothes for both of us.” Ky gestured to the linen suit he was wearing. “Obviously, I’m not really dressed for rock climbing either. So we’re probably going to change when we get there.”
Sure enough, the limo pulled up to a jungle hut next to the beach. Two of the familiar butlers from the resort were there with shorts, T-shirts, tennis shoes, and roc
k-climbing harnesses in hand.
She was directed to a changing area in the hut. There she shed her gorgeous maxi dress for ill-fitting gym clothes that she squashed into a too-snug harness that rode up on her crotch.
Seriously? She had cameltoe in the front and in the back after putting on the harness. It was possibly the most unattractive look she could have envisioned for her first on-screen date.
She peeked out of her changing room to see Ky checking himself out in the mirror. Amazingly, he somehow made the drab gray shorts and plain white T-shirt look good. Especially given the fact that his goodies were now perfectly on display thanks to the snug climbing harness strapped around his waist.
At least she would have something nice to look at while she climbed up some big rock for no reason at all. She had never understood rock climbing. Especially at those indoor gyms. What was the point of working up a sweat and climbing and climbing to reach nothing at all?
It was even more embarrassing to fall off of the rock-climbing wall and hang there, dangling like a piece of bait with everyone looking at her. That was one particular personal training incident that she wanted to erase from her memory.
Ky nodded at her. “Okay, glad you got ready quickly this time.” Was that sarcasm she detected? God, he really needed to get over it already. “If you’ll just follow me, we’re going to hike to our rock-climbing area in the jungle.”
Hike? The date was getting worse and worse. She trudged behind Ky as they hiked on an all-terrain trail deep into the jungle. She didn’t even bother to walk next to him and strike up a conversation. Fuck it.
Even if the cameras were on them every second, she really wasn’t in the mood to have a cheerful conversation. Not when she was dripping sweat and trying to keep her makeup from running in 100 percent humidity.
Adventure to Love Page 8