by Carl Weber
It didn’t really matter anyway, because she was never going to be a mother to this child. I had a plan, and as long as the arrival of my mother in a few weeks didn’t ruin things, I would be keeping this baby and the money. I wasn’t sure if she was coming to help Egypt after the birth, as she claimed, or to keep a close eye on me, but with her intuitive behind, she was the only person who could really stop me.
I patted my stomach gently.
“Did you know they plan on shipping me out right after you’re born, junior?”
The baby started squirming.
“Calm down, little one. I’m not going anywhere, not without you, at least, and perhaps your daddy. “
After one last kick, he settled down.
“That’s right, junior. You’re gonna be with your real mommy, not an auntie who wants to pretend she’s your mommy. They think I’m moving to L.A. and you’re staying here, but I have news for them…. Oh, I’m moving all right, but they don’t have any idea where. Although once he finds out, I really believe your daddy will come follow us.” I smiled at the thought.
“‘Cause, baby, ain’t no way in hell am I giving you up to Egypt. Nope. I’m not giving up my baby to that bitch who stole your daddy from me in the first place. That’s what’s wrong with this whole picture.”
Suddenly, the nursery door opened. Light from the hallway flooded the room.
“Isis?” It was Rashad, and he was carrying a baseball bat. “I thought I heard someone in here. What are you doing up?”
I answered him once my heart rate calmed down. “I was talking to your son.” I placed a hand on my belly. “He keeps kicking me.”
Rashad walked into the room and sat down on a short stepladder Egypt had used to hang wallpaper. He looked rather GQ-ish, sitting there with no shirt and his plaid pajama bottoms, holding the baseball bat.
“Hey, Rashad, can I ask you something?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
I pointed at where the bat was positioned between his legs. “Is that a baseball bat, or are you just happy to see me?” I said with a laugh.
“Huh?” It took him a second to catch on to the joke, but then he laughed too. “You stupid, Isis. You know that? Real stupid.”
“Yeah, I know, but—” The baby kicked me hard, and I held on to my stomach. “Oh, there he goes again.”
“You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine, but you need to talk to your son.”
“I wish I could.”
“Why can’t you? You’re his daddy, aren’t you? Put your hands on my stomach.” I guess all he needed was an invitation, because he didn’t hesitate to lean over and touch my belly with both hands. “Now talk to him.”
Rashad looked up at me. I was giving him a gift, and his smile let me know he appreciated it.
“Go ahead, talk to your son.”
He leaned his face close to my stomach and spoke softly. “Hey there, little man. This is your daddy talking to you. I just want you to know that I love you, and I can’t wait until you come out into the world.”
Rashad pulled his hand away quickly. “Oh my God, I could feel your stomach moving. I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”
“No, silly. He’s moving because he likes what you said. He was just trying to let you know that he heard you.”
“Really? Can I talk to him some more?”
“Of course you can.”
He placed his hands on my stomach again. “Like I was saying, I can’t wait until you come into the world. Me and you, we’re going to be tight, man. Just like me and your grandpa before he passed away. I’m never gonna let you down, man. I promise.” You should have seen the pride in Rashad’s eyes as the baby moved around under his hands. It truly was a beautiful sight.
“I can’t believe I was just talking to him. Man, that was crazy cool. Thank you, Pooh.”
I took a deep breath, then sat back in the chair, his hands still on my belly. “Pooh. Wow, you’re taking me back.” He had called me by the pet name he gave me when we were a couple.
“Yeah, we do have a lot of history, don’t we?” His voice softened, and his eyes looked kind of distant for a second. Like me, I’m sure he was thinking of what used to be, in another place and another time.
“We’ll have even more history in a month or two.”
“I can’t believe I’m going to be a father.” He started to rub my belly, but it felt more like a massage.
“I can’t believe I’m going to have a baby.”
After a few moments of silence, during which he kept massaging me, I said, “Can I ask you a question?”
“Uh-huh, ask away.”
“Are you going to be satisfied with just one child?”
“Of course I’d like to have more than one child, but right now I’m satisfied with the one that you’re carrying.” He removed his hands from my belly.
“Don’t stop. It relaxes the baby,” I said, though it was really for my own benefit.
He smiled and put his hands back on me. “Have I told you how much I appreciate what you’re doing for me and Egypt?”
“Uh-huh, you sure have, but I’ll tell you a secret.”
“What?”
“I’m not having this baby for Egypt. I’m doing it for you. Only you.”
He stopped rubbing again. I almost wished I hadn’t said what I did, because I could see that my confession bothered him. “Really? Why? She’s your sister.”
“Because I could see how much you wanted a baby. It was tearing you up inside. You’re not a drinker, but you were drunk every night. If I hadn’t agreed to have this baby for you, who knows where you might be right now? Heck, you might not even be married.”
“Yep,” he admitted, “that was definitely a low point in my life.”
Then he tried to minimize his own pain by saying, “Don’t get me wrong. Egypt and I would have been okay even if we didn’t have a child, but this is so much better.”
I wasn’t interested in hearing about Egypt, and especially about the strength of their relationship. I kept the focus where I wanted it. “I couldn’t bear to see you that way. You haven’t realized by now that I’d do anything for you? I never stopped loving you.”
“Whoa.” He moved back to put a little distance between us. “This conversation is getting a little uncomfortable for me.”
“Why? Because you feel the same way?”
“No, because I’m married to your sister. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
“Well, I’m having your baby. Does that mean anything to you?”
He sighed. “Of course it does. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m married to your sister.”
I was getting so sick of everyone considering Egypt’s feelings, like I didn’t matter.
“What if I told you I was willing to have another baby by you?”
I guess I’d caught his attention with that one. He stood there speechless, just long enough for me to complete my thought. “Instead of moving to L.A., what if I move to Petersburg or Williamsburg? Nobody has to know but me and you. Egypt can have this baby, but the next one can be mine. Matter of fact, we can have two: another boy and a girl. It’d be nice to have a daughter, wouldn’t it? Plus, all your kids will have the same blood.”
He stared at me for a while. At first I thought maybe he was considering my plan, which was a pretty good one, if you ask me. But finally he just shook his head and turned to leave the room without saying anything.
“Think about it, Rashad,” I said to his back before he exited. “How many men have a chance to have the best of both worlds? You can have two sisters, and you know you want some of this. You do remember how good it is, don’t you?”
He left without giving me a response, but I told myself that was a good thing. I knew I had gone out on a limb by propositioning him so directly, especially when he was still talking about my sister like theirs was a match made in heaven. So, the fact that he didn’t go off on me was a good sign. If I made it to the breakfast t
able tomorrow without Egypt killing me, I’d know he was at least thinking about it. And then I could feel confident about putting the rest of my plan into action.
The baby started squirming again.
“Relax, junior. I know you don’t want to live with Auntie Egypt, but your daddy’s going to be there, and it’s only a temporary solution. Your momma still loves you. She just has to get your daddy back in bed. Once Auntie finds out we’re sleeping together, she’s going to divorce your daddy, and you’re both going to come live with me and your baby sister or brother. And that, my little darling, is a promise.”
Loraine
43
I woke up lying on my back with a smile on my face, physically and mentally satisfied for the first time in five years. It was still dark outside, and I didn’t want to wake Michael, so I lay there next to him, reminiscing about the wonderful evening we’d shared. The night started with a fantastic Valentine’s dinner cruise on the James River that one of the girls in the office had set up. I’d been on these dinner cruises before, with their dry chicken and hard rolls, but all I could say this time was that the chef outdid himself. The food wasn’t just good; it was excellent. I don’t think I’d ever had salmon that delicious, and Michael’s steak was like butter. The comedian had us all in stitches, and let’s not forget the DJ, who was off the chain and had me dancing up a storm.
I was sure there would be a lot of talk at work come Monday morning about how the boss went wild. Most of my staff was probably still in shock, because I never showed that side of myself around the office. I was out on the dance floor, doing the Electric Slide and the Macarena—and I know I took everyone by surprise when I started dirty dancing with Michael. When I was with Leon and we went out, I was usually rather reserved. Michael brought out a confidence and freedom in me that had been missing for quite some time.
Speaking of something I hadn’t had in quite some time, I’d finally made love to Michael, after a month and a half of holding out. All I can say is he put it on me last night. I hadn’t had sex like that in a long, long time, and the orgasms came one after another in waves that reached from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. He’d done things to me I hadn’t thought possible with a woman my size. I don’t know where he got his formal training, but he sure knew his way around a woman’s body.
The only real question was, could he do it again? Well, I was about to find out. I kissed his exposed shoulder, then made my way up to his ear, blowing in it lightly.
“Mmm, hey, beautiful.” Michael turned over and kissed me.
“Hey yourself, handsome.” I kissed him back, reaching down between his legs to take hold of his penis and massage it gently. I loved the way it felt as it grew in my hand.
“You trying to tell me something?”
I shook my head and grinned. “Not you, but him.” I tightened my grip on his now fully erect penis.
He kissed my neck as he laughed. “I see. Well, I guess that’s a good thing, since he seems to be controlling everything when I’m around you.”
“You know what they say—all men think with their dicks.” I purred when he nibbled on my earlobe.
“Is that right? Is that what they say?” He gently rolled me on my back.
“Uh-huh, that’s what they say.” His lips had moved their way back to my neck. My body felt like it was on fire. “So, baby, right… right now … I need you to be a genius.”
“Well, in that case, let me introduce you to my dick.” He mounted me. “Loraine Farrow, I’d like you to meet my friend Albert. Albert Einstein.” He slid himself inside me. It felt like a perfect fit, like we were made for each other.
“Michael, I think Albert and I are going to be friends for a long time.”
“I sure hope so.” He kissed me, and we made sweet love until we were both spent, falling asleep in each other’s arms.
A few hours later, I woke up feeling contented, not to mention worn out. I got out of bed and slipped on my satin nightgown, careful not to disturb Michael’s sleep. I wanted to make him breakfast in bed as a reward for a job well done.
As I put on my slippers, I looked out the window and caught a glimpse of something very disturbing across the street. It was Leon’s car. He had the driver’s side window down, and I could see the frown on his face plain as day. He wasn’t a happy camper, most likely because he’d seen Michael’s car in the driveway. What the hell was he doing here anyway? And how long had he been sitting outside?
Jesus Christ, can I have one decent day without the weight of the world falling on my shoulders?
I turned back to the bed, where Michael was sleeping. I wondered if I should wake him and tell him about Leon but decided to let him sleep. Leon was my problem.
I picked up my cell phone and walked down the hall to my home office. I sat on the love seat near the front window, where I could see out but couldn’t be seen. I dialed Leon’s number. I wanted to deal with the situation personally, but I didn’t want to deal with it face–to-face.
I didn’t even give him a chance to say hello. As soon as I heard the call connect, I said, “What the hell are you doing across the street from my house?” I didn’t realize I was so angry until I started to talk.
“Just sitting here. Was that you or that guy I saw peeking out the window?” He didn’t sound angry like the last time when he ran up on me and Michael. This time, he sounded like a lost soul.
“Leon, how long have you been out there?”
“I don’t know. A couple hours maybe.”
“What do you want?” I was trying not to blow up at him again.
“I wanted to ask you a favor.” I didn’t say anything. I just listened. “I wanted to know if you’d come to therapy with me tomorrow. Please, Loraine.”
“I’m sorry, Leon. I can’t do that.”
“Why? I’m not asking you to be with me. I’m just asking you to go to therapy with me. I’m doing good, Loraine. You can ask the doctor.”
“I’m sorry, but you’re not my problem anymore. You need to go home.”
“This is my home, Loraine. At least it used to be.”
Have you ever felt sorry for someone you knew you shouldn’t feel sorry for? Well, that’s how I felt talking to Leon. He sounded so pitiful, and as much as I didn’t want to care, I couldn’t help it.
“Well, then go to LaKeisha’s house. She loves you. Why don’t you give her a chance?”
“Loraine, I don’t even know who that woman is.”
I couldn’t believe he was still denying it. Well, that was enough to make me stop feeling sorry for him. “You know what, Leon? My man is calling me back to bed, and I’m sick of your lies. If I were you, I’d be gone before he comes downstairs.” I hung up the phone.
Isis
44
It was Easter eve, and everyone in the house was asleep when I sneaked into Rashad’s home office to use the computer. The only reason I was doing it so late at night was because my mother was in town, and she’d been hovering over me like a swarm of bees at a picnic. I needed to use the computer, because I’d been approved for an apartment in Petersburg, and the landlord was e-mailing me the lease.
Rashad still hadn’t said a word to me about my proposal to start a second family. The good news was that neither had Egypt, so I assumed it was still our little secret and that I should go ahead with my plans. Although we hadn’t spoken about it, I was sure he would take me up on the offer, because he hadn’t tried to distance himself from me like he’d done in the past. On the contrary, he’d actually been friendlier, or maybe more forward was the proper way to put it. As a matter of fact, Egypt couldn’t make it to one of our Lamaze classes, and during that session, Rashad was touching and feeling on me in ways I know Egypt wouldn’t have appreciated. I never said a word, because I was sure he was just testing the waters—the same way I was testing the waters when I left an apartment listing on his office chair last night. It was only a matter of time before I’d be in Petersburg and he’d be making da
ily visits.
Feeling content after I printed out two copies of the lease, I walked back to my room. I’d just made it there when all of a sudden, I felt a gush of warm water run down my legs.
My first thought was, Oh my God. I peed on myself.
I ran to the bathroom. When I sat on the toilet, I was shocked to see blood in my panties. “Oh, shit. I think my water broke,” I said aloud.
A wave of fear took over me for a few seconds. This was really happening. Suddenly, I felt a tightness that rippled from my back to my navel. I braced myself for some serious pain, but it never came.
“Aw, this is a cinch. That little cramp ain’t nothing. I’m going to get through this labor easily.”
As soon as the little wave of pain passed, I opened the bathroom door and shouted out, “Rashad, come here! I think my water broke! Rashad!”
I could hear Egypt and Rashad scuffling around in their bedroom, and then they both ran to the bathroom in their robes, followed by my mother and father. I sat there with my panties pulled down, still sitting on the toilet, pointing to the blood.
“Let’s get ready to go,” Egypt said.
“Hold on.” My mother took control of the situation. “How far apart are your contractions?”
“I don’t know. I only had one, I think.”
“Well, we better time them. You got a long way to go before this baby comes, Isis. This is just the beginning. How about if you take a shower, because it’s going to be a long night.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. The whole time I was pregnant, I was so focused on what would happen after the baby was born that I never gave any serious thought to the actual delivery. Now the moment had come, and I was not looking forward to the hard work that my mother was predicting.