The Art of Falling

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The Art of Falling Page 4

by Jenny Kaczorowski


  “Your design was so elegant,” Ms. Fury said with a wistful smile. “Maybe when they review at the end of the semester you’ll be allowed to submit again.”

  “You mean we’re stuck with that thing until January?” Bria said. “It’s sick and wrong and if that’s the message we’re sending other schools – ”

  “It’s just a painting,” Bas said.

  Rafael’s eyes fixed on Bria’s, quickening her pulse. “Art is never just art, is it?”

  Grabbing her pencil again, she sketched out a quick mock-up of the hunter with a Dia de los Muertos sugar skull and turned it around for him to see. “We’ll have to fight art with art.”

  He smiled, approval sparkling in his black eyes. “I knew you were a fighter.”

  She fought to hold back her own smile, bending deeper over her sketch.

  Over the next three classes, she clarified and refined the sketch, missing a rousing lecture on her English teacher’s admiration for Lady Macbeth, a short film in Spanish and something about order of succession on Civics.

  Nursing her little rebellion gave her focus, power. Instead of giving in to her impotence, each line with her pencil made her feel stronger, bolder.

  The bell finally rang and the whole room jumped to life, charging toward the door. Last class before lunch and you’d think no one had ever eaten before.

  “Bria.” Ben’s voice stopped her short.

  “Hey.” She slipped her sketchbook into her bag. “What’s up?”

  “Hi.” He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. “I just wanted to say hi.”

  She ducked into the space between two sets of lockers. “I think you did.”

  “How are you?”

  Not many boys made her feel short. Ben did. She leaned against the cool metal of the lockers, letting them steal some of the heat flashing over her body. “Fine. Good.”

  “I don’t want things to be weird. I didn’t mean…”

  “I know.” She smiled again, forcing herself to meet his eyes. Warm, dark eyes that haunted her dreams. Eyes that twinkled like stars, even when he wasn’t smiling.

  Eyes that erased the mural and Rafael and lunch from her mind.

  “You haven’t told anyone, have you?” he said.

  She dropped her gaze to the scuffed toes of her boots. Wow. He was totally embarrassed about kissing her. “No. Of course not. I can’t go around kissing jocks.” She narrowed her eyes. “Don’t you know I’m the devil?”

  He gave her a little laugh. “Evil Bria.”

  “I’m terrifying.”

  The bell rang again, leaving the halls deserted. “I guess we’re late,” he said.

  “It’s just lunch.”

  “Abby is going to wonder where you are.”

  How had she not noticed how his voice had deepened? How it tugged at that place deep in her belly? Why couldn’t he have stayed a kid forever? “Won’t Alyson and the rest of the cheer squad?”

  Ben placed his hands on the locker behind her. “It’s not like she’s my girlfriend or anything. They can wonder.”

  “So you won’t tell?” she said, drawing things out as long as she could. He might be ashamed, but, damn, it felt good to be locked between him and the wall, held just as captive by that lopsided smile as by his arms on either side of her.

  “Not if you won’t.” He moved even closer, the scent of his body – all sharp spice and that touch of salt air that seemed to permeate his skin – filling her senses.

  She put her hand flat against his chest to push him away, but instead she curled her fingers into his shirt, pulling him against her.

  Crap. Crap, crap, crap.

  She squeezed her eyes shut before he got close enough to kiss her, bracing herself for impact. But the moment their lips met, she melted and all her objections faded into a soft murmur. His hand slid down her arm, raising goose bumps through her long sleeved shirt and hoodie. The slightest nudge from her and his lips parted, his tongue brushing hers. A quivery feeling moved from her stomach outward to her limbs and she tightened her grip on his shirt. Her other hand strayed to his hip, fingers grazing his jeans.

  Damn, he could kiss.

  Damn, damn, damn.

  He swept aside the loose hair framing her face and pressed his lips to her neck, just below her ear. “What was that?” he whispered, his lips skimming her skin.

  “I don’t know. I’m just…” She ducked out from under his arm. “Confused? I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be sorry.” His smile faltered.

  “Ben?” Alyson called down the empty hall. She managed to make those three letters sound like a cheer.

  He cringed and stepped into her view. “I’ll catch up, Aly.”

  “We need you to talk about the pep rally next Friday.”

  Bria snickered and he twisted toward her, still hidden behind the lockers.

  “Who are you talking to?” Alyson asked.

  “No one.” He glanced at Bria and she shook her head, focusing her disappointment into a fake smile. “Just a friend. Don’t worry about it.”

  “Whatever. Just hurry up.” Alyson’s heels clicked against the floor, retreating back toward the lunchroom.

  “See.” Bria leaned back against the wall and looked away from him. “You’re not ready for this either. We’re way too different. It would never work. Not really.”

  “Yeah.” He dropped his head, running his hand through his hair. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

  “But it’s okay. We’re okay.”

  He smiled. “Sure.”

  Then, turning his back, he walked away, leaving her with the bitter aftertaste of her own daydreams.

  Her knees locked up, holding her in place until she could remember who she was.

  Bria Hale was made of stone. Bria Hale didn’t cry. Bria Hale didn’t let anyone, especially beautiful boys, hurt her.

  Shaking herself free from Ben’s ghost, she marched into the cafeteria with her head high.

  Chapter Six

  The crowd around the coffee cart in front of the high school bordered on ridiculous. The school year had apparently caught up to everyone at once.

  Bria checked her watch and calculated the number of students in front of her. Just enough time if Abby ordered a normal drink, which she never did. “Why don’t you bring coffee from home?”

  Abby rolled her eyes. “Mom thinks the caffeine is making me jittery.”

  “You? Never.”

  Dolores stifled a giggle. “Abby’s the picture of calm.”

  “I’m not – ” Abby stopped tapping her foot on the ground and immediately started fidgeting with her MedAlert bracelet. “Okay, fine. I’m a little high strung. But the caffeine totally helps with the ADD.”

  They reached the front of the line and Bria turned her head away. The shiny espresso machine reflected Mom’s eyes with perfect clarity and even the brilliant violet of a fresh dye job couldn’t disguise the uncertainty churning behind them.

  Kissing Ben was a mistake. So it shouldn’t hurt so much. It shouldn’t feel like he’d ripped out her heart when he’d walked away, dragging the bloodied remains behind him.

  “Hold this.” Abby shoved her bag into Bria’s hands. “I can’t find my wallet.”

  “I got it,” Dolores said, handing a crisp bill to the barista. “Grandma sent me money for homecoming and stuff.”

  “Fine by me.” Abby picked up two of the coffee cups from the counter. “Did you ask that guy yet?”

  “Yep.” Dolores grinned around the lid of her coffee. “All Mom-approved and everything.”

  “Wow. How’d that happen?”

  “He’s from our parish. Totally cute too. Kind of a stoner, but he’s nice.”

  “So that just leaves you.” Abby rolled her eyes up at Bria.

  “I’m not going,” Bria said. “And if you drag me along, I’m going solo.”

  “What about Rafael?” Dolores said.

  “We’re just friends.” Yet for some reason, the protest came
out a little forced.

  “I know, I know,” Dolores said. “But he’s cool. You might even have fun. Just as friends.”

  “With certain benefits,” Abby said.

  “Is your lipstick in there?” Dolores asked, nodding toward Abby’s bag, still clutched in Bria’s hand. “I can’t find mine.”

  Alyson and Kaileigh pushed their way around them, dumping fat-free, non-dairy something and Stevia into their cups.

  “So you and Ben?” Kaileigh said, leaning against the counter.

  Bria stiffened, digging around in Abby’s bag with no real idea what she was hunting for.

  “We hung out a LOT this summer. A lot,” Alyson said, biting down on her lower lip for emphasis.

  “And by hung out you mean…?”

  “I mean a lady never tells.”

  They both giggled, turning Bria’s stomach.

  “Did you find it?” Dolores said, holding out her hand.

  “Oh. Sorry.” She handed over a tube of mascara.

  “Um. Don’t think that works as lipstick.”

  “Sorry.” She tucked the mascara back into the bag.

  “Caffeine,” Abby said, grabbing the bag and switching it out for a coffee. “I swear, it’s a miracle worker. Down that and you’ll be fine.”

  “God, he is so hot,” Kaileigh said, sweeping past them again.

  “I know, right?” Alyson said. “Our babies would be flipping adorable!”

  Bria took a sip of Abby’s coffee and spluttered. “Good lord, what is that?”

  “The light roast with a double shot. Same thing I always get.”

  “Terrible. I gotta get to class, but I’ll see you in lunch if that doesn’t kill you first.”

  “It’s not that bad,” Abby said, turning to Dolores. “I swear. It’s really not.”

  ~

  “Hey.” Rafael leaned against her locker, arms crossed and a pout of his lips that made her want to look at them a little too long. She’d seen him use it to get underclassmen to do his homework, talk teachers out of writing him up and charm the cafeteria ladies into not charging for lunch. She hated that it worked on her too, but it was a good pout.

  “Hey.” She spun the dial on her lock, nearly forgetting the combination with him standing over her.

  “I’ve been thinking about the mural.”

  Even though they were nearly the same height and she probably weighed more, he had a way of sucking out the air around him. She just didn’t know if that was good or bad.

  She dropped her books inside, grabbed her lunch and slammed it shut. “What about it?”

  “I think you should do it.”

  She rolled her eyes. “My dad would kill me if I vandalized the school.”

  “Isn’t your dad a musician or something? He’d totally get it.”

  “He’s an entertainment lawyer. Totally different. He actually cares about the rules.”

  “It’s not like it’s real vandalism anyway. It’s social commentary.” He followed her to the lunchroom, even pulling out a chair for her when they joined Abby at a table. “But if you’d rather sit behind your safe white canvas and paint daisies…”

  Abby looked up from her burrito, eyes moving between them. “Who’s painting daisies? And what commentary?”

  “Painting over the mural.” Rafael spun a chair around backwards to straddle it and lean his arms across the back.

  Abby clapped her hands. “Are you going to do it?”

  “No.” Bria pushed her unopened lunch aside. “I’m not going to risk Pratt over some stupid painting I don’t even have to look at.

  “Are you seriously scared of getting caught?” Rafael said. “I thought Bria Hale was fearless. The girl that did that wave painting? She wouldn’t back down from doing the right thing because she was scared of getting caught.”

  “I’m not afraid. It’s just a stupid idea.”

  “I just didn’t think you were the kind of girl who ran from a challenge.”

  Bria glared at him, mostly because she was exactly that kind of girl. Otherwise, she’d tear across the lunchroom, launch herself into Ben’s chest, and kiss him like there was no tomorrow.

  “I’m not scared,” she said. “But that doesn’t mean I want to be a criminal. How would I even get in there? They keep the gym locked after hours and the only students with the access code are athletes.”

  “Ben,” Abby said.

  Blood rushed to Bria’s chest, leaving her hands and feet cold, and her eyes sought out him out across the room. “Your brother is never going to help us. He is the high school.”

  “He doesn’t even have to know,” Abby said. “I’ll think of something.”

  “If you do it on a Friday, it’ll have time to dry before anyone notices it on Monday,” Rafael said. “I can make sure the janitor’s closet is open so you can get to the paint and a ladder.”

  “There you are,” Dolores said, sliding a tray toward Bria before sitting. “I snagged the last veggie burger for you.”

  “Thanks, but I’m not really hungry.”

  “It’s like I don’t even know you any more,” Abby said. “But if you’re not hungry, I’ll gladly eat it for you.”

  Bria shoved the plate toward Abby.

  “I heard you guys talking about a ladder,” Dolores said, nibbling at a plate of fries.

  “Have you seen Bria’s plans for the mural?” Rafael asked.

  Dolores’ eyes went wide. “No.”

  Rafael reached into Bria’s bag and grabbed her sketchbook.

  “Hey!” She slapped his hand and he winked at her with something far too intimate brewing in his eyes, like he thought he had every right to her private thoughts. “Asshole.”

  He handed the sketchbook to Dolores. “I thought girls like confidence.”

  “Not douchebagery,” Abby said. “Hands out of other people’s bags.”

  “Thank you, Abs,” Bria said, still glaring at him.

  “This is brilliant,” Dolores said, eyes shining. She held up the sketch with the sugar skull.

  “Right?” Abby said.

  Bria groaned. “Lor. No. Don’t tell me you agree with them. I need you on my side.”

  “Actually.” She grinned again. “I love it. Why should the jocks always get the senior prank? It’s time for the rest of us to get our chance. We can fix the mural, make our point and remind them that you should have painted it in the first place.”

  “And get kicked out of school.”

  “You won’t get kicked out,” Abby said with an eye roll. “At worst they’ll make you repaint it.”

  “Do it.” Rafael tapped his foot against Bria’s. “Give us the mural this school deserves.”

  “Don’t you have your own friends?” Bria said.

  “Fine.” He stood and touched her arm, brushing his fingers along the length of it as he walked away. “I’ll see you later.”

  Abby and Dolores exchanged a look and giggled.

  “What?” Bria said, but the heat creeping up from her belly into her face confirmed she knew exactly why they were laughing. “He’s being a douche.”

  “He was just flirting,” Abby said. “And he’s so hot. Look at that ass.”

  “Abby.”

  “So you’re defacing the school this weekend, right?”

  “Nope.”

  “Fine.” Abby sighed. “But it would be an awesome protest.”

  “Alight, seriously.” Dolores jabbed a glob of ketchup with a fry. “This weekend. I don’t want to sit at home. My mom is freaking out about college applications. You have to rescue me.”

  “Ugh,” Abby said. “Mine too.”

  Across the cafeteria, Ben stood, drawing Bria’s eyes. “We should go to a football game.”

  Abby and Dolores both twisted in their chairs to stare at her.

  “Why on earth would we do that?” Abby said.

  “Well, if you’re dragging us to dances, we might as well have the whole high school experience.”

  “Footbal
l is stupid and barbaric.”

  “Where’s your school spirit?” Bria challenged.

  “I’m in,” Dolores said. “I’ll take some shots for the paper. My portfolio is low on sports.”

  “Have you ever shot a sporting event?” Abby asked.

  “Nope.”

  “So we’re going to a football game. Great.”

  “I actually mean watch the game,” Bria said. “Not get wasted with the stoners under the bleachers.”

  “We have to watch it too?” Abby said.

  “Your brother is the quarterback. You should have a little family pride.”

  “Fine. But you have to go to homecoming now.”

  “Deal.” Bria grinned.

  “Wait. Did you just win? How do you always win?”

  Bria stole another glance toward Ben’s table. Even with his back turned, the way his hair curled toward his ears kept her eyes longer than she meant. He caught her gaze, but snapped his head around, like he couldn’t stand the sight of her.

  “What was that?” Dolores asked.

  She swiveled back around, touching her fingers to her lips. “What?”

  “You looked at Ben. It was weird.”

  “Oh, don’t tell me you actually have a crush on him,” Abby said. “God, Bri. That was a joke. It’s bad enough every other girl in this school wants to screw him.”

  Dolores shifted to watch Bria’s face. “Bria has better taste in guys than that. Anyway, you like Eli, hands down the dorkiest band geek in school.”

  Bria shook off the heat pouring over her body and reminded herself to thank Dolores for the misdirection someday. “I still can’t believe you’re hooking up with Eli Cohen. Didn’t he rat you out for ditching gym last year?”

  “So?” Abby inclined her head toward the object of her latest infatuation and spun her bracelet around on her wrist. “He totally got cute over the summer.”

  Ben rose, stretching his long legs, and picked up Alyson’s lunch tray. He didn’t even glance in Bria’s direction when he walked past to drop it in the trash.

  “Not at cute as Rafael,” Dolores said.

  “Um, yes,” Abby said. “Come on, Bri. I need deets.”

  “They’re just boys.” Bria pushed up from the table, grabbing her bag and heading for the bathroom.

 

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