She was a very beautiful woman. And each time he looked at her, he wondered where his boldness to have her had come from. She was far out of his league and it would probably make more sense if he told her tonight that they should make their relationship nothing more than friendship. Yet that was the last thing he intended to tell her, and it made him quake inside to imagine how she was going to react.
His moccasins made no sound on the red brick as he walked over to her chair and squatted on his heels in front of her.
Handing her the sage bloom, he said, “You deserve roses. But the sage is strong and can withstand any type of weather you throw at it. Like you, my lovely Maggie. You’re a strong woman. You’ve just never realized it yet.”
She took the pungent blooms and lifted them to her nose. The scent was wild and sweet and strong and Maggie wondered if that was the way he thought of her. The idea made her pulse beat with warm pleasure. “Is that what you wanted to tell me?” she asked.
Shaking his head, he planted his hands on both arms of the chair and leaned into her. Brushing his lips against hers, he murmured, “No. That’s not it. We’ll talk later. Right now I just want you.”
His stark admission was as effective as the erotic touch of his lips, and she groaned with need, then whispered, “And I want you, Daniel Redwing.”
In a rough but reverent way, his lips seized hers at the same time his hands slid into her hair. Cradling the back of her head, he feasted on the sweetness of her lips until her hands were pulling at his shoulders, urging him to come closer.
Finally he ended the kiss and, breathing heavily, he rose to his feet, then reached for her hand. Maggie slipped her fingers around his, and he gently tugged her to her feet and into his arms.
With his hands roaming her back, crushing her to him, Daniel kissed her again, until the ache in his loins vibrated through his whole body.
“Let’s go over here,” he whispered.
Taking her by the hand, he led her away from the tinkling fountain to a spot on the ground-level porch that ran the length of the house. A sturdy chaise lounge built of the same willow limbs and cushioned with weatherproof pads sat at an angle and was shaded by the deep shadow of the porch roof.
He nudged her down on the seat, then once again he squatted in front of her and began to undo the buttons on the gauzy white blouse she was wearing.
She gasped with surprise. “Daniel! What are you doing?”
A low chuckle rolled past his lips. “Undressing you.”
Her eyes widened. “But we’re outside! And it’s not even dark yet.”
In spite of her protest, he pushed the material down off her shoulders, then traced his fingers into the soft, deep valley between her breasts.
“The sun has set and the shadows are long. There’s no one around here for miles. Except me and you.”
“Oh.”
Her sigh of relief whispered against the side of his neck as he bent forward and nuzzled his lips along her delicate collarbone.
“Then I guess it doesn’t matter what we do, right here, outside, in the open,” she said distractedly as the touch of his lips slid downward over her bare breast.
“Anything you want, my darling.”
His words were muffled, but that didn’t matter. Maggie had heard them, and the knowledge that he aimed to please her was like a potent drink burning the pit of her stomach.
Arching toward him, she buried her fingers in his thick black hair and urged him toward her breast. The sharp tug of his mouth sent shards of unbearable heat to the very core of her femininity. Crying out with pleasure, she tried to pull him closer, to gather his body against hers.
Pulling slightly away from her, Daniel quickly shed his clothes, then hurriedly undressed Maggie. She had never made love in the outdoors, and the feel of the evening air brushing against her skin was like a velvet cloak sliding over and around her.
When he joined her on the wide lounge, he clamped her naked body tightly against his and buried his lips in the curve of her shoulder.
“You taste like cream, Maggie. Sweet, thick cream. The kind that goes straight to your heart and causes all sorts of problems.”
She hung on to him as his lips continued their foray over the mound of one breast and down the faint indention in the middle of her abdomen.
“I don’t want to be a problem,” she said, her voice languid with desire.
“If you call wanting you twenty-four hours, seven days a week a problem, then I’ve got it.”
She watched his dark head descend her pale torso, and her heart began to thud at an even faster pace. Blood thrummed at her temples, in the tips of her fingers and deep in her loins.
“Daniel, don’t keep making me wait,” she said with an edgy gasp.
His hands slid to her inner thighs and nudged them apart. “Shh. Don’t be so impatient my little night bird.”
His fingers touched her, then as he stroked her, teased her until the desperate ache inside her became an unbearable throb, the tiny moan lodged in her throat grew until it burst past her lips in a low, needy groan.
Maggie writhed against his fingers for relief, but suddenly he took the pleasure away and she opened her eyes just in time to see his head burying itself between her thighs.
Shock parted her lips, but she didn’t have a chance to protest. Not that she would or even could. The feel of his tongue sliding into the most intimate part of her was like a thousand orchestras crashing to a crescendo inside her head. And in only a matter of moments her whole body was splintering into tiny pieces of bliss.
“Oh. Oh, Daniel. Daniel,” she finally murmured as the pieces of her body settled back together. “You’re too good to me.”
“I want to be better. Much better.”
Easing over her, he brought his wet lips down to hers, and as he kissed her he joined their bodies with slow, exquisite pleasure and they made love until the sky was filled with stars and the mesa grew dark.
Once their bodies cooled and the sweat on their skin had dried, Daniel carried her into the house and placed her in the middle of his bed.
As he switched on a small shaded lamp at the head of the bed, Maggie looked curiously around her at the chinked wooden walls and the tile floors that had shifted to a slight tilt but still hadn’t lost their luster.
The cover on the bed was a handwoven blanket similar to what she’d seen at the Hubbell Trading Post on the Navajo Reservation. The colors were gray and burgundy and yellow, and the faint nubby texture of the thread was perfect for the rustic old house.
“Where did you get the blanket? I’ve seen some like this, except smaller. The price tag on them was several thousand dollars,” she said as she ran her hand over the blanket. “This one would cost a fortune.”
He lay down next to her and propped his head on his hand. “My mother wove it. I’m sure it looks Navajo to you, but I won’t tell her you thought so. She’s a proud Ute, you see.”
Smiling softly, she reached out and touched his cheek. “I like your house, Daniel. Especially the back porch,” she added provocatively.
Scooting closer, he ran a hand over her bare hip, and his eyes glinted with remembered pleasure. “I’m glad you like it. Especially the porch.”
Curling her arm around his waist, she rested her cheek next to his chest. “On the phone this afternoon, you mentioned that you wanted to talk to me about something. Was that a ploy to get me over here, or did you really have something to tell me?”
His hand moved from its resting place on her hip to slide up her spine. As he began to speak, his fingers kneaded the nape of her neck.
“It wasn’t a ploy, Maggie. I’m not a man who has hidden agendas or tactics. I speak what I feel. Sometimes that gets me into deep trouble. But that’s just the way I am.”
Yes, he was a straightforward sort of man, Maggie thought. Never at any time would she think he was lying or being evasive with her.
“I believe you.”
He rubbed his cheek agains
t the crown of her head. “Good. Because I have been thinking long and hard about you and me. And I’ve come to a decision.”
Her heart was literally knocking in her throat as she tilted her head back and met his gaze. “Daniel, what do you mean? What sort of decision?”
Using his fingers, he combed the wayward hair from her brow, then bent his head ever so slightly and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I don’t want us to go on like this. I want us to be together. All the time.”
Maggie’s blue eyes softened, then misted over. “I think—I don’t know if I want us to have this conversation, Daniel. The night has been so beautiful. Aaron is at Jess and Victoria’s. I don’t have to rush home to be with him. Please lets not ruin this time together with an argument.”
A wry smile moved his lips. “How do you know there will be an argument?”
She grimaced. “Because. You’re going to ask me to move in with you…to have an affair with you and I’m going to have to tell you no.”
His face went smooth, and after a moment he rolled onto his back and joined his hands in the middle of his chest. Since he was only wearing a pair of white boxer shorts, his bronze body was exposed to Maggie’s view. She drank in the gorgeous sight of him as he thoughtfully twiddled his thumbs.
“So. You think that’s what I want,” he said.
She heaved out a breath. “Well…yes. It is, isn’t it?”
Her question seemed to snap him out of his casual pose and he rolled back toward her and took hold of the side of her waist.
“Maggie! You are not a woman who could have an affair. Not with any man. I would never ask you to do such a thing. I would never want you to…to lower yourself.”
Suddenly, as she looked into the depths of his brown eyes, she felt lost and confused. He was looking at her as though she were something precious, too precious to let go.
“I don’t…understand. If that’s not what you want, then what are you trying to tell me? That we need to end our relationship now? Tonight?”
His palm moved over her lips to prevent her from saying more, and she looked up at him in confusion.
With an impatient groan, he said, “Maggie, I’m trying to tell you that I love you. I want us to get married. I want us to have a family. Not just with Aaron. But for us to have more children…together.”
Maggie was so stunned by his words that she went absolutely limp against the mattress. Daniel wanted to marry her? He wanted them to have babies? To share the future as man and wife?
After Hugh’s death, she never, in her wildest dreams, imagined her life starting over. Never dreamed she would ever feel a man’s hand touch her with love and desire, or consider the possibility of carrying his child inside her.
She had fallen in love with Daniel. There was no sense in even trying to deny that, to herself or to him. But being in love with a man wasn’t the same as being his wife or making a family together. Those were risky objectives. She’d loved and lost. She’d found out firsthand how fleeting life really was. She couldn’t go through that all over again.
“Maggie? Don’t you have anything to say?”
Tears began to roll down her cheeks as she turned her gaze on Daniel’s face. “I’m sorry, Daniel. I can’t marry you. Now or ever.”
Chapter Eleven
Daniel sat up in the middle of the bed and stared at her with such a wounded expression, Maggie’s tears flowed even harder.
“Why?”
It was just like him, she thought, to expect one simple question to answer everything.
Wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand, she raised herself up to a sitting position while silently wishing for a robe. Being naked made her feel even more vulnerable to him.
“Because…I never plan to marry again. I made myself that promise a long time ago.”
“Promises can be broken. Especially when they’re made for the wrong reason.”
Emotions jabbed at her and caused her gaze to drift downward to the woven blanket beneath them. “Daniel, you know what I went through with Hugh. Or at least I think you understand how that devastated me. How these past years have been like a deep, yawning canyon with no way to climb out.”
His fingers came beneath her chin and tugged her gaze back around to his. His eyes were unblinking as he spoke. “What does that have to do with me? With us?”
She made a sound of frustration. “Don’t you understand, Daniel? If we did get married and have children and then—” she paused and drew in a deep, painful breath “—and then I lost you for some reason…I…”
Maggie couldn’t go on. She couldn’t bear to think of losing this man in any way.
“You couldn’t what?” Daniel pressed her.
Shaking her head, she whispered, “I couldn’t go on, Daniel. I couldn’t go on without you.”
Her tears began to flow slowly and silently down her face. Daniel drew her into his arms and smoothed his hand over her rumpled hair. “Maggie, if you felt this way, why did you ever sleep with me?”
Clinging tightly to his shoulders, she pressed her cheek next to his. “Because you’re a very persuasive man, Daniel. And because I love you.”
As soon as she uttered the word, he went stock-still, and within his chest, she could feel the beat of his heart pounding like an ancient Ute war drum preparing for battle.
Tilting her head back, he looked into her eyes. “I love you, too, Maggie. So very much. Dear God, you think you’re afraid? In my entire life I never expected to say those words to a woman. I have always prayed for the Great Spirit to guide me away from a woman like you.” His lips twisted wryly. “I guess I didn’t pray hard enough. Or He isn’t listening.”
“Why would you be afraid, Daniel? You’ve never been married. Never lost anyone.”
His eyes suddenly hardened. “Only my father. And I saw how it was to grow up with just one parent, without a father to guide me, to teach me how to be a good man, a good husband, a good father. The only things he did teach me were about alcohol and slovenliness and abuse. And to pray not to be like him.”
“Oh, Daniel,” she whispered in a choked voice.
He stroked her cheek. “For all these years, I was afraid to get involved, to love any woman. I knew that Robert Redwing’s blood ran through my veins and that I probably wasn’t capable of having and caring for a family any more than he was. But then I met you, and I love you so much, Maggie, that I have to believe I can be those things.”
Her heart was suddenly weeping with both joy and sadness. “Oh, my darling, you are all those things. I have no doubt about that. You’d be a wonderful husband and father. But—”
A rueful sound of agony slipped past her lips and she buried her face against the side of his neck while her arms clung fiercely to his rib cage.
He traced the tiny bumps of her spine with his fingertips. “But what?”
She didn’t answer immediately. Because she didn’t know how to explain to him about the deep-seated fear she held inside her.
“I don’t want to go through the pain of losing you, Daniel. It would hurt too much. Do you understand?”
With a hand at the back of her head, he urged her to look at him. His face was solemn, but there was a soft glow of love in his eyes that Maggie couldn’t turn away from.
“I understand that I want you. And you want me.” He brought his lips next to hers as he spoke again, this time in a low, husky voice, “Let’s not talk anymore, my Maggie. I want to love you. I want to wake up in the morning and see your face on my pillow. Don’t ruin that for me. For us.”
She gave him the answer he wanted by tugging him down on the bed and placing her lips over his.
The next morning it was past sunrise when Maggie awoke in Daniel’s bed. The sheet covering her nude body was mottled with light that was filtered by the thin curtain at the window. The scent of freshly made coffee filled the room.
The space next to her was empty, and she wondered how long he’d been out of bed. It was not good that she’d
stayed overnight, she thought. But she had not been able to resist him last night. And she was so hungry to be loved by him that she hadn’t wanted to give up the precious time of being in his arms.
Wistfully Maggie drew her fingers across the empty spot where he’d lain, and her heart jerked with regret. Daniel was going to take her staying as a sign of surrender. He was going to think she’d changed her mind about marrying him. But she couldn’t change her mind. To marry him would be disastrous. She’d drive him crazy with her constant worrying. Every time he walked out the door, she’d drive herself crazy with fear that something was going to happen to him. It was unreasonable fear but, just the same, it was there inside her.
On the foot of the iron bedstead, Daniel had carefully draped her clothing. The thoughtful gesture touched her ragged emotions and stung her eyes with tears. She took a deep breath and was about to push back the sheet to get out of bed when Daniel entered the room.
Clutching the white sheet to her naked breasts, she leaned back against the pillow and waited for him to come stand beside the bed. He was wearing a pair of Levi’s with no shirt or shoes. There was a steaming cup of coffee in his hand and a sexy grin on his face, and she was shocked to feel her own body stir with excitement at the sight of him.
“Good morning, Maggie. I thought you might like a cup of coffee.”
She looked around as though the bedroom was the last place for drinking anything. “In bed?”
“It’s the best place for coffee. And other things,” he added slyly. Then, reaching for the pillow next to her, he motioned for her to lean up.
Maggie leaned forward and he punched the pillow up behind her back. She felt like a pampered queen as she took the hot coffee from him.
With one hand she pushed the tangled hair from her eyes while she carefully sipped at the dark, steaming brew. “You shouldn’t be spoiling me like this, Daniel. A woman could get very used to this kind of treatment.”
He sat down on the edge of the mattress near the crook of her waist. Goose bumps rushed over her skin as he reached over and ran the back of his forefinger up and down her bare arm.
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