I gained me maybe another two seconds. Every time a slug dented the blanket it knocked the Vampire Queen back another foot until she tangled with the vanity and went down with a crash of glass bottles and a scream of frustration.
I threw the empty handgun at her and vaulted for the bedroom door.
Alicia was waiting for me on the other side of it, blocking my way sans blanket; one thing about those vampires—they can move!
But even as the shock of surprise was filling me it was merging with a tiny wedge of hope. For the first time since I’d know her—even during the impossibly vicious battle with Ivan on the KC rooftop—I saw the pale chest laboring a bit, an ugly green slime leak from the fence post’s purple entry. And something else. During the fight with Ivan I’d seen Alicia do something I wasn’t aware vampires capable of: take to the air during combat. So far at least, Alicia hadn’t done that tonight. There was still great speed and strength here, undeniably, but I got the distant feeling she wasn’t quite the tower of hellish power she’d been in Topeka, before Ivan had pounded her into bricks and tarpaper of that rooftop. Was it the spiked fence? Had that iron strut done more damage than she claimed?
She stood before me now, ready to pounce again, burning eyes slit as if reading my mind. “Learned some tricks, has he? Working out in the gym, perhaps?”
My eyes swept the darkened living room for a weapon. I could hardly see the furniture, much less anything to use against the vampire.
We stood for a moment facing each other like two street dogs, each giving the other a moment to catch our breath. “How did you find me?” I stalled.
Alicia raised her chin imperiously, as if the question didn’t dignify an answer. “I’m a vampire, idiot! The Queen! The greatest vampire the world has ever seen!”
I looked past her toward the still slightly ajar front door. Even if I could make it around her…
“The greatest in small town America, maybe” I gasped, “but you’re in Chicago now, where the real carnivores do business!”
Alicia smirked. “The arrogant Ivan Kolcheck?” She spat blood. “I turned that young pup! Taught him everything he learned and only half what I still know!”
I nodded, fighting for breath. “So I guess that little hotel rooftop in KC was just to put him off his guard?”
She chuckled. A reptilian sound. “The hapless Mr. Magee. He seeks to buy time by invoking my wrath!”
Another liquid chuckle, eyes sweeping over me appraisingly. “Yes, our young Edward has learned a thing or two himself since last we crossed paths. But I frankly remain unimpressed. I mean a common handgun? Please!”
“A couple feet lower with that wooden table leg and you’d be laughing through your ass,” I sneered. “If my aim had been a little more—“
“But it wasn’t, Mr. Magee. It wasn’t. No. I’m afraid he’ll have to do better than that.”
I was getting my second wind, head beginning to clear. “If you don’t mind, Miss Alicia, I’d just as soon not be referred to in the third person.”
Her smile was almost genuine now. “Speaking of third persons…”
My blood froze.
Sylvie!
The slithery chuckle returned. “I must commend you on that at least, Mr. Magee, you do have excellent taste in women. A pin-up model yet! Not bad! Not nearly in my class, of course,” and she cupped and lifted her bosom, “but not bad!”
I took an anguished step toward her. “Where is she?”
Alicia went all wide-eyed innocent. “Your little Sylvia?” She tapped her chin in mock reflection. “Now let me think…we shared a cab ride to that friend of hers across town…I invited myself in for a drink…what happened next? …hmmm…”
“Goddamnit!” I hissed.
Alicia tossed her lovely shoulders in defeat, “…I really can’t recall which of them I stuffed up the chimney and which I merely let hang upside down by the shower spigot to bleed out…”
I grabbed a shiny length of metal floor lamp nearby, smashed the shade and bulb against the wall and leapt toward the vampire like a jousting knight.
A foolish move, of course.
But later I’d wonder if it was merely Alicia’s knowledge of that or the fact that her breathing was still a bit labored…that she hadn’t herself completely recovered. In any case she just stood there smiling, hands on hips, as I drove the lamp pole through her stomach.
For one silly instant I thought I’d actually won.
But she just went right on smiling at me, then shaking her head, then grabbing the pole in both hands, jerking it free and tossing it over her shoulder.
“The heart, Mr. Magee! It only works if you pierce the vampire’s heart directly! With wood!” And she made a clucking sound of disappointment and shook her head almost sympathetically at me. Or was that just wishful thinking?
The next thing I knew I wasn’t in the living room anymore.
I have a vague memory of her hand around my throat, her other hand around my groin (I think she secretly enjoyed that last part) and of myself spinning through the air as if thrown.
It was kind of nice there for a moment…kind of refreshing with the living room whistling past my ears and then the night air of the veranda flattening my hair. Then I struck something hard.
It had to be the veranda railing, because when my senses came back to me I was holding onto it with both hands, a terrible ache in my right shoulder but otherwise not in danger. Other than the fact that I was on the wrong side of the railing and my bare feet were dangling high above the picket fence of the Marina City garden far below.
Alisha sashayed up like she had all the time in the world, most of the second hole through her body already scabbing over even if the one between her breasts remained stubbornly weeping.
She came up beside me there on the wind-blown veranda, hand on her hips, raven hair tousled silkily in the night breeze, leaned over the rail and peered past my dangling body to the little tower garden so very far below.
“What do you think, Mr. Magee? Wooden slate on that little garden fence or iron ones?”
My fingers were already going bloodless, my shoulders—especially the right one—quickly numb.
Alicia came directly in front of me, smiled down into my eyes, bent lower and kissed me gently on my sweat-beading forehead. “Mr. Magee—?”
I could hardly get up the wind to speak with. “I hardly think…it makes any difference…in my case…”
Her smiled widened enough to show me her incisors, now neatly retracted. “I’d give the world to know what he’s thinking right now!”
I squinted up into her face with the last of my strength. “But…you already know…”
She frowned down. “Pardon?”
I groaned, knuckles giving way. “You’ve been here before…remember…and the only thing still keeping you breathing, a little brown poodle holding onto your wrist…”
Alicia straightened, cocked her head at me. “He thinks to play on my sympathies. That’s I’ll suddenly develop a human heart and pull him up. Conveniently forgetting what an immense pain in the ass that mutt has been to me!”
She shook her head in disgust, turned and walked from the veranda.
“Good-bye, Mr. Magee. You may be a failed vampire hunter, but I have feeling you’re going to make a big splash in Chicago…”
I felt a single tear squeeze from one agonized eye.
Let go of the railing. And fell.
Three, maybe four inches. Before the slim white hand reached down, snatched my wrist and pulled me back over the railing and onto my feet with effortless strength and gentleness.
“Really, Alicia,” The Count admonished, “you must someday at least pretend to play by the rules! We agreed, no torture!”
I almost went backward over the rail again from exhaustion. But The Count pulled me straight, steadied me, brushing convivially at my wrinkled T-Shirt with those elegantly veined hands. “Eddie, my boy! Barefoot? You’ll catch your death! Delightful boxer shorts,
though! I must get me a pair? Bloomingdales?”
“Walmart,” I gasped.
“Figures,” Alicia snorted, leaning against the veranda door.
I leaned forward, hands on my knees, trembling, waiting for the vertigo to pass, The Count patting my back gently. “Deep breaths, my boy, that’s a good soldier!”
“Hmph!” from Alicia, clearly bored with the whole evening.
I nodded a thank-you to The Count. “How did you find me?”
“He’s a vampire, moron,” from The Queen.
The Count chuckled. “And we’ve been through something like this before, Edward, remember?”
I pushed up suddenly from my knees, ignoring the dizziness. “The twins!”
The Count steadied me. “The twins are fine, Eddie. I only permitted Alicia a quick sip to strengthen her, isn’t that right, my dear?”
“Models!” Alicia snorted. “Skin and bones! Like day old Kool-Aid.”
I looked up hopefully. “And Sylvie?”
The Count hugged my shoulder. “Fine, fine! Everyone’s fine, my boy! Alicia was merely goading you a bit.” He gave the Vampire Queen a level look. “A bit too much, I think!”
Alicia scoffed, lit a cigarette.
I felt my strength returning by degrees.
I looked from one vampire to the other. “Goading me why?”
Alicia blew blue smoke. “To fight, Einstein.”
The Count slapped my back happily. “And fight you did, my boy! Wonderfully! Isn’t that right, Alicia? Alicia? Isn’t that right?”
The Queen made an indecisive sound. “He did okay,” she allowed.
My head was still spinning. “I’m lost. What the hell’s going on? You wanted me to defeat her?”
“And you nearly did, my boy, you nearly did! Grand showing, really! Smashing!”
“Yeah,” Alicia puffed, “but not smashing enough.”
I took a step away from The Count, looked at him with new eyes. “It was you, wasn’t it? You were inside my head all the time…guiding me! Like that time against the bully at the restaurant…”
“Hey,” from a sarcastic Alicia, consulting her watch, “it has an actual brain in there! Too bad the skull around it’s so thick.”
The Count turned to her patiently. “Nonsense! The lad has a wonderful skull! It’s my own feeble mind that’s to blame if anything. Now, if I were a few hundred years younger…”
Alicia flicked her butt over the railing, started toward us. “Yeah, yeah. Meanwhile, the experiment was a failure. So what do we do now?”
I turned to The Count, incredulous. “Y-You two are working together?”
“Unfortunately,” from Alicia, fists poked on her hips.
“A small truce,” The Count smiled down at me, “a momentary détente to ensure bigger goals!”
I took another step backward, refusing to believe my ears. “You’re in league with her! To spread the plague! Take over the world!”
Alicia grunted. “I told you he talks too much.”
“Eddie, you must understand—“ the old vampire reached for me.
I jumped back, heart sinking. “Stay away from me! Jesus! I trusted you!”
“Eddie—“
Alicia groaned a huge sigh. “Oh, for chrissake, Count, can we get on with this, please! We tried, we failed! Now it’s time for the next step!”
The Count started for me, eyes welling sympathy. “I am sorry, Eddie…”
“The hell you are!” and I started over the rail again.
I wonder where the hell I thought I was going.
Didn’t matter anyway.
Long before I got the chance, The Count’s fangs sank deep into my throat.
NINETEEN
I woke with sun in my face.
Just like last time.
But with every detail of the evening before etched indelibly in my mind.
I vaulted up on the couch flooded with anger. I threw off the army blanket with clenched teeth and a dragging sense someone had made a fool of me—me!
I looked down at the heavy mahogany coffee table beside the couch, still fighting not to believe what was so clearly obvious. A dream. Just another silly dream. Hell, maybe they were all dreams! Maybe this was a dream!
I was sick to vomiting with dreams!
That’s when the smell of fresh brewed coffee wafted over me from the kitchen.
Alicia was just coming toward me through the partition in her slinky black dress with a steaming cup in her hand. But when she passed into morning light from the veranda window the slinky dress turned into a slinky nightie and Alicia became Sylvia.
“Son of a bitch!”
She jerked to a startled halt before me, nearly sloshing coffee. “Well! Good-morning to you too! Shall I hand you this coffee or just pour it over your head?”
I slumped against the back of the couch. “Pour it over my head,” and reached out to take it.
It was, as usual, delicious. “Thank you.”
Of course, Sylvie was looking pretty delicious herself in that negligée. “Sorry about snapping.”
She settled across from me in the easy chair. “Bad dream?”
I winced visibly at the word. “Please. Can we start the day with another subject?”
She tucked shapely legs under her, sipped from her own cup. “Not a dream. A nightmare.”
I shook my head. “I really don’t want to talk about it.”
Only I did. And despite my angry disappointment, I felt great; none of the usual morning logies, no headache, no drowsiness, not even a cramped muscle. Maybe it was the coffee.
“You look incredibly sexy.”
I looked up at her.
She waved me off. “Don’t have a kitten, I’m not pushing for that baby! You just look great is all.”
I nodded, vaguely puzzled. “I feel great…”
“Whatever those bad dream were you must have gotten in a good night’s sleep.”
I nodded uneasily over my cup. “Anyway, what about you, Sylvie? That was a short vacation.”
She sighed. “It wasn’t a real vacation, just a momentary retreat. Somewhere to rest and think.”
“And did you? ‘Think’?”
She made a sour face that created an adorable dimple. She really looked great in that filmy nightie.
“My friend has a new roommate. I could swear the back of her head is going flat.”
“What--?”
“From banging it against her bedroom wall all night behind me.”
“Ah. Didn’t sleep so hot yourself then.”
“Sherry is my best friend since high school. Beautiful, bright, charming. You’d love her. But her taste in men hasn’t risen above the freshman football level. We sat there last night, the three of us, with the TV off, Sherry jabbering away for hours about how great Harley was at this, Harley was at that, me nodding attentively, smiling until my jaws ached, Harley slouching in the corner pursuing an issue of Hustler like a caged ape. By midnight all I wanted to do was grab her and shake her and tell her to lose this…loser. But not being able to do that, of course, I opted for a headache I didn’t even have to fake, made some lame excuse I can’t remember and came back home. God, Ed, you really do look great in the morning light. Have you been working out?”
“Worked over. My mind, anyway.”
“I’m sorry. Clancy, huh? Have you decided what you’re going to do?”
I sat there rubbing the back of my neck, staring down at the coffee table. There was a large glass ashtray occupying one corner. “I haven’t even decided what part of this damn thing is real yet…”
Sylvie frowned over her cup. “What do you mean?”
I stared at the heavy glass ashtray. Finally reached over and picked it up. It was surprisingly light. I held it close. I could see my reflection almost perfectly in one side of the beveled glass. I drew the ashtray closer, tilted my head, ran my fingers along my neck across the carotid artery where The Count had sunk his fangs last night. There were no puncture w
ounds, not even a blemish. Nothing.
“Ed?”
I juggled the ashtray a moment, finally tossed it high—
“Hey! Be careful!”
--caught it one handed and replaced it on the table.
“Take it easy! That thing weighs a ton!”
“Not really,” I sighed. I felt like going back to sleep. But I was too wide-awake, too amped up. Yeah, it must have been the coffee.
“So vivid…” I was mumbling.
“What was?”
I thought about it a moment, finally shrugged and told Sylvie about last night. When I was finished it seemed more real than ever. And pretty impressive, according to Sylvie’s expression.
“Wow. That was some dream. And these two vampires…you’ve seen them before? They really exist?”
I threw up my hands in surrender. Then propped my head on them, staring down at the rug. “Sylvie, I don’t know what the hell ’real’ means anymore.”
My eyes jerked suddenly to her. “The twins! Are they okay?”
“Of course.”
“You’re sure? They came home last night?”
“This morning, right after I came in. They’re tucked away in their rooms, snoring happily like good little Barbie dolls.
“You’re sure?”
“Ed, I saw them! What’s this all about?”
I buried my head in my hands again, shook it back and forth soberly. “Nothing. Nothing. None of it makes sense, even if it was a dream. I mean, I know The Count can get inside my head…guide me, maybe even from great distances, I’m not sure. But he and Alicia joining forces…even if he’d consent to such a thing, she’d never go for it!”
I shoved up in my boxers, began pacing around the room. “Let’s say it was some kind of…dream-message. Why go to all that trouble…Alicia and I tossing each other all over the apartment…explaining all that stuff about some kind of détente, some weird solidarity between them, only end up biting me in the neck until I…”
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