She rolled her lips and looked away from me, and I was sure I’d gone too far, sure I’d crossed some invisible line, but when she asked, “Can I sleep here tonight?” I knew I hadn’t. “I’m just…I feel so alone at home, but when I’m with you, I don’t feel so lonely.”
“You can stay here anytime,” I told her, and I meant it. “You never have to ask.”
She closed her eyes, and I moved my hand off her face as she shuffled down the bed. I went to let go of her hand, intent on allowing her to settle, but she held on tighter. “Lie with me?” she asked, and there was no way I could turn her down.
* * *
BELLE
I reached for the gun, stretching my fingers as far as they would go, and finally, they connected with cool metal. My breath caught in my throat as I pressed my finger on the trigger, turned onto my back, and fired several shots out.
Curtis’ eyes were wide as the bullet tore through him, but then the color changed. Gone was the almost black, and in its place was hazel. His ink-black hair faded shorter, turning gray in parts, and his jaw morphed into someone else’s.
“Ford?” I gasped as his body started to fall forward, and I tried to catch him, but he was too heavy. “Ford?” My heart beat out of my chest as the life drained from his eyes.
“Belle,” he whispered, and blood dripped from the side of his mouth. “Belle.”
I placed my hand on the side of his face, the tears flowing from my eyes freely. There was nothing I could do to save him. Nothing.
“I’m so sorry, Ford.”
He lifted his arm, his hand covering mine on his face. He opened his mouth and tried to say something, but no sound came out, and then his arm went limp. He was gone. Gone forever.
I shot up in bed, crying out from the pain in my body and the agony of the images I couldn’t get out of my head. My heart pounded in my chest as I stared into nothing. The room was spinning, the edges of my vision hazing in and out.
“Belle?” a deep voice asked, and a sob broke out of me at the sound. The creak of a door opened, and I looked in that direction, but I couldn’t make anything out. A paw touched my arm, and then a hand touched my face, turning it to the left. “Belle?”
I blinked several times, and the fog started to clear. “Ford?”
“What happened?” he asked, his hazel eyes full of concern. They weren’t lifeless, they weren’t drained. They were very much alive.
“I…” I swallowed as I felt the baby kicking. “I had a nightmare.”
“You’re okay,” Ford said, his tone soothing. “You’re okay. Nothing can get you here, I promise.”
I nodded, wanting to believe him, but the fact of the matter was, I hadn’t been safe since I’d met Curtis all those years ago. I’d thought I was, but I wasn’t.
“I can’t get the images out of my head,” I confessed to him. “They won’t leave.”
“What images?” he asked, and I knew it was an innocent question, but I was scared if I told him, they’d come back.
“Of Curtis,” I croaked out, glancing around the room. The sun was starting to come up, peeking through the half-closed blind on the window. Lottie was crawling closer to me on the bed, her eyes holding so much knowledge. She could sense things we’d never understand. “I shot him.” I pushed my hand through Lottie’s fur. “I killed him. I watched the life drain out of him, and…and I’m not sorry. Not one bit.” I sniffled, trying to hold my emotions at bay. “He was lying on top of me, and all the blood…” I trailed off, not able to continue. It was as if Curtis was still there, standing over me and threatening to take everything away from me.
Ford was silent, and I wondered if he thought differently of me, but when I turned to look at him, I saw understanding shining in his eyes. I knew he’d killed people too. Killed them to protect others around him. It was on the tip of my tongue to ask him how he coped after it, but before I could say anything, he said, “It gets easier.”
“It does?” I asked, my voice less croaky now. Telling him what happened seemed to lift a weight off my shoulders I hadn’t even realized was there.
“Yeah, Baby Belle, it does.” He smiled, and the baby kicked again. “Your eye is open more today.” He was trying to change the subject, and I greedily accepted it.
“It is?” I turned my head back and forth, realizing I could see more out of my swollen eye now. It had been nearly a week since the incident, and although I was healing, it felt slow going. “Thank god.”
“The outside will heal faster than the inside.” His brows were low as if he was remembering his own pain. “But you will heal. I promise you that.” He paused and crouched down in front of me. “Your dad called while you were sleeping last night.” My eyes widened, and I dreaded to think what he’d said to Ford. I’d left them a note telling them I’d gone out because I was tired of listening to them talk about what Ford had done. How he’d broken their trust. They, better than anyone, should have known you didn’t choose who you loved.
“What did he say?”
“Just wanted to know if you were with me.” He shrugged and moved his hand from my face to my stomach. “I told him you were.” I could tell there was more to the conversation, but I wouldn’t push it. “Whoa.” Ford’s eyes widened, and he stared at my stomach and then glanced up at my face. “What was that?”
“That,” I started, “is your baby kicking the life out of me.”
Ford stared at my stomach in awe, his mouth hanging open. “Holy shit.” He moved his hand over my stomach, and the baby kicked again in response. “That’s crazy.”
“Yep.” I shuffled forward. “Try having it kick you in the bladder and nearly peeing your pants on the daily.”
Ford shook his head and chuckled. “I can’t believe we’re having a baby.”
“That was a hint,” I continued, but he wasn’t paying attention to me, he was too busy staring at my stomach with fascination. I understood it, I really did, but I was about to pee myself. “Ford, I need to pee. Bad.”
“Shit.” He backed away with wide eyes, his hands in front of him like he was about to catch something. “Sorry. I just…I’ve never felt anything like that before.”
I turned and placed my feet on the floor, staring around the room. “I get it. It’s a weird sensation.” I looked back at him. “It kicks all the time, so you can feel it again. But first…bathroom?”
His lips spread into a grin, and he stared down at his hands for a beat as if he could still feel the baby kicking. I cleared my throat to get his attention, and he shook his head and pointed to the door on the left wall. “In there.”
I didn’t say another word as I stood and darted to the bathroom. Gone were the days when I could hold it in. When I needed to go, I had to go, and there was nothing that would stop me.
Once I was finished, I washed my hands in his sink and looked in the mirror. He was right, the swelling on my eye was better, but the bruises were just as bad. I had a band of them around my throat, and more under the T-shirt and leggings I was wearing. I’d raided Asher’s closet a couple of days ago for some of his T-shirts because nothing I had fit, and Mom had gone out and bought me some leggings. I basically only wore what resembled pajamas all day long.
I placed my hands on the side of his sink and took in the rest of his bathroom. Gray tiles covered every surface, and I was starting to realize all he had in this house was gray.
“Belle? You okay in there?”
“Yeah,” I called out and turned the tap off. I wiped my hands on a towel hanging to the side. “Coming.”
I opened the door and expected to see Ford in the same position, but he was standing on the other side of the bed, wearing his dark jeans and T-shirt, and his belt with a gun attached to it was around his waist. “I’ll drop you home on the way to work,” he said, not looking at me as he made the bed.
“Oh, okay.” I hesitated as I watched him, and was fascinated by the way his tattoos danced on his arm as he placed the pillows back on the bed. “I di
dn’t realize you had to go into work today.”
“Yeah. Your dad wants to see me.” He halted in front of me, and I could tell he was holding something back. I understood why. There was so much unsaid between us, but we’d made a start at bridging the gap last night. “I know you probably don’t need me to say this,” he started, moving from foot to foot. Was he nervous? “But I need to make sure you know that I’ll be there no matter what.”
“I know.”
“Anything you need, any time of the day. No questions asked.”
“I know,” I repeated, but he wasn’t listening to me.
“And not just for the baby, but you too.” His gaze met mine, so much shining inside his hazel orbs. “I know we’re not in a place we planned to be, but I’m okay with that. I’m okay with whatever my life will be, as long as you’re in it in some way, shape, or form.”
I wasn’t sure what he was trying to say. Did he want to be friends? Only friends? Was this his way of drawing a line between us?
“I…okay.” I should have said more. I should have asked him to clarify, but I was scared I’d put my foot in it. He’d said he’d walked away and stayed away to protect me, but what did that mean now? He’d confessed to falling in love with me all those months ago, but he hadn’t said he still felt the same way.
Maybe it was one-sided? Maybe it was all me? Either way, it didn’t matter at that moment. All that mattered was I knew he’d be there. And right then, that was enough for me.
Chapter Nine
FORD
I could feel all eyes on me, burning a hole through the side of my head. It had been that way for days. The guys on the team only spoke to me when they absolutely had to, and I understood why. I’d kept a secret from them, but it was more than that. It had been a secret about Belle, the girl who they all viewed as family. They thought I’d taken advantage of her. They thought I’d destroyed boundaries. They didn’t understand that you couldn’t choose who you fell in love with. They didn’t understand that the prospect of not touching her nearly broke me.
They were on the outside looking in, but people in glass houses should never throw stones.
I understood they needed time to process everything, but I wouldn’t let it go on forever. There was nothing I could do to change the situation. All I could do was my best to make sure I was there for the people who needed me—Belle and the baby. They were what mattered most now. My entire life had shifted the moment I’d realized the baby was mine, and there was no going back now.
Belle had stayed at my place again last night, and I lay by her side, watching her sleep and waiting to see and feel the baby kick. After the first night last week, I wasn’t sure whether she’d come back, but she had. She’d turned up at my door again, moaning that her bed wasn’t as comfortable as mine. Only that time, I’d messaged Brody right away to tell him she was at my place. Belle was twenty-one, but I had to show Brody respect if I had any chance of being part of their family again.
I’d been pushed out, but I understood why. For over twenty years, I’d been a permanent fixture, and now I was an outsider looking in.
I shuffled some papers on my desk and stared at the words which were all blurring together. There was nothing I hated more than paperwork, and Brody knew that, which was why I’d been given a shit ton to do. He was punishing me, but what he failed to realize is it wouldn’t work. I didn’t give a fuck if I had to sit at this desk for the next twelve months. All it would mean was that I was here and not out on an undercover job, so although I hated it, there was a silver lining.
My cell pinged, and I let out a breath, thankful I had a distraction. It was already three in the afternoon, and although I knew I could leave at any stage, I wanted to stay to show some kind of solidarity. I didn’t know what I was thinking, but it seemed to make sense in my head.
Cade: Come to my place at 5.
I frowned down at the message. I hadn’t spoken to Cade for a couple of days, and although he was pissed I hadn’t told him about Belle and me, he’d taken it better than everyone else. I had a feeling Aria had something to do with that, though.
Ford: I’ll be there.
I pushed my cell into my pocket and let my head drop back. Usually, Lottie would have been with me, but Belle had asked if she could stay with her today, and I couldn’t deny her. At least that way she’d have an added bit of protection, especially as she was at home on her own most of the day.
The time seemed to go by at a snail’s pace, but as soon as it hit 4:30 p.m., I closed my folders and headed out. I passed Jord, who was sitting in front of his computers, and Ky, who was taking a nap in the break room. I’d barely seen Ryan since the day in Brody’s office, and I didn’t really care, if I were honest. He’d made a mistake, one which had cost us all.
By the time I pulled up outside Cade’s house, it was just turning five, and when I switched my engine off, I saw Brody’s car. Fuck. What the hell was he playing at now?
The front door swung open, and Aria’s smiling face appeared. She waved me over, so I pushed out of my car and walked up the driveway. “Hey, Tyson.”
“Hey.” She stepped back to let me in and shut the door behind me. “Cade is holding an intervention.” I raised my brows in response to her, but all she did was chuckle and push some of her dark-red hair behind her ear. “Get ready for this,” she whispered, and I followed her as she moved into the living room.
“Are you serious, Cade?” Lola ground out, standing up from the sofa. She narrowed her eyes at me, and if looks could kill, I’d have been dead.
“Yes, I’m serious, Lola,” Cade replied from where he was standing opposite the sofa with his arms crossed. “This has gone on long enough.”
Aria poked my arm and tilted her head as if she was saying, “Told you so,” and moved into the kitchen.
“Ford,” Cade greeted, nodding at me. “Come and sit.” He pointed to a chair next to the sofa, but I declined and leaned against the wall instead. I was surrounded by Eastons, so there was no way I was letting my guard down.
“You’re out of line, son,” Brody told Cade, but the bite behind his words wasn’t there. He sounded more tired than anything.
Cade ignored him. “We’re all here because, apparently, the grown-ups don’t know how to act their age instead of their shoe size.” I raised a brow at him, surprised by the way he was talking to Lola and his dad. It wasn’t often Cade put his foot down. The last time had been when Aria had been taken in to the hospital, but that was thirteen years ago. “This needs to stop.”
“What needs to stop?” Lola asked, tilting her head at him as if she had no idea what he was talking about. I’d known Lola since she was a nineteen-year-old woman trying to fight her way through each day. She may have been forty now, but she hadn’t changed one bit. She was fiery, but so was her daughter.
“This.” Cade threw his hands up in the air and smacked them off the side of his thighs. “Belle has been through enough, and you’re not helping with the way you’re acting about Ford.” His gaze met mine. “Yes, he lied and kept a secret about what their relationship was.” He turned back to face both Lola and Brody. “But so did you two.” Lola opened her mouth to respond, but Cade didn’t give her the chance. “You forget I was there. I watched the fallout between my mom and dad, and I felt the betrayal deep in my bones.” He pulled in a breath and scrubbed his hand over his face. “But I forgave you both. I didn’t hold it against you, not the way you are with Ford.”
“That was different circumstances,” Lola responded, her voice losing its edge.
“Who cares about the circumstances? I know none of us in this room can tell them it’s wrong.” Cade looked over at Aria and smiled. “Belle is pregnant, and we all know Ford will be there no matter what.”
“I will,” I interjected, pushing up off the wall. I’d kept quiet, not wanting to rock the boat any more than I already had, but it was time I told them how I felt too. “I get it, I’m twice her age, and she’s your daughter.” I sta
red at Brody and then Lola. “But there is no way in hell that I won’t be there. I’ve never walked away from any of my responsibilities. You both know that. I protect what’s mine.”
“I never doubted you would,” Lola said, her shoulders drooping. She was losing her fight, but I wasn’t going to celebrate just yet. “I just…it’s…” She screwed up her face. “It’s just weird.”
Brody snorted and stretched his arm over the back of the sofa. “That’s your answer? It’s weird?”
Lola rolled her eyes. “What?” She held her arms up and then pointed at me. “He’s basically my best friend. He’s been there through everything, and now…now he’ll be like my son-in-law.” Her eyes widened, and mine widened in response. “That’s just—”
“Belle did tell me she’d marry Ford,” Aria said from the kitchen. We all whipped our heads around to her. “What? She did.”
My stomach bottomed out, and I tried to think of a time when I could have given her that impression. Aria knew we’d been sleeping together since the lake house, so none of this would have been that much of a surprise to her.
“Say what now?” Cade stepped forward. “When did she tell you this?”
“At Mom’s wedding.” I spluttered, and she grinned at all of us. “When she was eight, she told me—and I’m paraphrasing here—‘you can help me plan my wedding when I get married, Aria.’” She shrugged. “I asked her who she was marrying, and she told me, ‘Ford, obviously.’”
“Jesus Christ, Aria,” Lola growled. “What are you trying to do? Give me a heart attack?”
Aria chuckled, but her face suddenly turned serious. “I know it’s not the most ideal situation, but I was there when Belle walked into your house during the fake memorial. I saw the utter devastation on her face.” She met my stare. “And I saw the way they looked at each other at the lake house over spring break.”
“That doesn’t make this any easier,” Lola groaned out.
Tied Bond: Bonded Duet: Book Two Page 11