Chances Are

by Wendy Lindstrom

  Rebecca asked Adam to retrieve a large package wrapped in bright red linen and tied with a green ribbon from beneath the tree. “This is for you, Adam. This is one of the many things I’ve had to relearn this year and I’m afraid the end product wasn’t quite what I wanted.”

  Adam sat on the hearth beside Rebecca’s chair and unwrapped the linen. Inside were a pair of blue knit mittens, a bit crudely constructed. The pattern in the matching scarf revealed more than a few missed stitches, but the smile on Adam’s face revealed nothing but joy at the gift from his wife. “I love them, Rebecca. I’ll look especially dashing in blue, don’t you think?” He wrapped the scarf around his neck twice and pulled on the mittens.

  Rebecca laughed, but her eyes were filled with apology. “You’re welcome, Adam. I wish I could have done a better job with them.”

  “They’re perfect, but you are the only gift I’ll ever want or need. Finding your way back to me is gift enough for a thousand Christmases.”

  Nancy’s eyes teared at the sentiment. She knew the long path Adam and Rebecca traveled and that their love was stronger for it. And she smiled at the feelings of young love that filled the room. She thought of the many Christmases she had spent with Hal in this very room, when they were young newlyweds, and when their children were young. And here she was now, celebrating Christmas with her grown grandchildren.

  As Adam fetched another package from beneath the tree, Rebecca said, “We have something special for you, Grandma.”

  When Adam placed a large box on her lap, Nancy raised her eyebrows. “Have you knit an afghan for me, Rebecca?”

  “You’ll see,” Rebecca said, exchanging a conspiratorial grin with Adam as if they were too pleased with themselves. “This isn’t just a Christmas gift. It’s a thank you gift, for everything you have done for me and Adam. You were my safe harbor during a dark and terrifying time. Without your strength and love, I wouldn’t have made it through those first few months after my accident.”

  “Nor would I,” Adam said.

  Nancy felt tears fill her eyes. “Well, I can’t imagine being thanked for loving my grandchildren, but I’m glad to know I was able to offer some comfort to the both of you during that time. It was hard on our entire family. It hurt to see you so lost and uncertain, Rebecca. But look where you are now, the two of you happily married. That was your doing, not mine.”

  “Well, Grandma, you were with us each step of the way, and this is something to say thank you for helping us through. We love you, Grandma. Now open your gift,” Rebecca said with a laugh.

  Nancy tugged the top off the box and found not an afghan but a stunning dress. “Oh, my….”

  She lifted it out and help it up so she could admire it. The dress was two pieces of gray silk taffeta. The bodice had a deeper gray silk inset and the shoulders were inset with flocked green silk. Heavy cut steel buttons decorated the collar and cuffs and matched the row that trailed down the front of the bodice. She set the bodice aside and pulled out the skirt. The front of the skirt was inlaid with green silk matching that on the sleeves and had three rows of ruffles along the hem. She stood up and held the pieces up to her, looking down to admire her dress.

  “This is just beautiful. I can’t believe you and Adam did this for me. This is far too much!”

  “You deserve so much more, Grandma. You’re always doing things for everyone else in this family. When we saw the dress in the shop window in Boston, we knew it would look wonderful on you, and we just had to get it.”

  “Well, I’m overwhelmed and a bit speechless,” Nancy said, looking into their smiling faces. She could see how much it meant to them to be able to give her this gift. “I’ll wear this to our New Year’s Eve celebration and dance until my feet hurt.” Everyone laughed, and as they exchanged hugs, Nancy said, “Thank you for this beautiful, touching, and ridiculously extravagant gift.”

  In the midst of the hugging, Dawson got up and stepped away. “I have something for you, too, Nancy,” he said, fishing out a small burlap wrapped box from beneath the tree. “I thought of you when I saw it.”

  “Gracious, not another gift!” Nancy clasped her hot cheeks between her palms. She was unaccustomed to receiving gifts from a man, and was unsure of the proper way to respond. She untied the corded bow and unwrapped the burlap to reveal a small box inside. Inside the small box was a stunning ivory broach, hand painted to resemble the marshy shores of Crane River. “Oh my… I … I don’t know what to say. It’s simply beautiful, Dawson, and such a welcome reminder of my days living at Cecily’s cottage. Thank you, but this is too much and wholly unnecessary.”

  “It’s something I wanted to give you,” he said.

  Flustered by his gift, Nancy wished she had done more for him. But she hadn’t expected such expense or gift giving. “Adam, will you fetch that small package wrapped in a handkerchief for me, please?” When Adam placed the package in her hand, she passed it to Dawson. “It’s not much, Dawson, but I do have a little something for you.”

  She watched as he unwrapped the gift and laughed out loud at its contents. As she’d done for every member of her family, Nancy had knit a pair of slippers for him using leftover yarn scraps from her knitting basket.

  “Really, Nancy, you shouldn’t have,” he said, making them all laugh.

  “Well, I thought you should have your own pair of slippers instead of wearing that old pair of Duke’s. I’m not sure why they were still in the bedroom.”

  “I’m sure I have a few ideas,” Adam said, which elicited laughs from everyone. “We’ve all been the recipient of Grandmother’s scrap slippers.”

  “Some of us have received several pairs of them,” Rebecca quipped.

  “It’s a bit of a family joke,” Nancy explained for Dawson’s benefit. “I thought our gifts would be light and playful tokens to celebrate the day. I hadn’t expected anything so grand as that gorgeous dress or this beautiful broach. I’m sorry I thanked you with a pair of scrap slippers.”

  “Actually, Nancy, I’m honored to be included in your family ah… tradition.”

  Adam and Rebecca burst into laughter, and Nancy joined in. Years ago, those scrap slippers were all she could afford to make for Hal and her kids, but those gaudy slippers were warm and served their purpose well. Even after she could afford to purchase slippers, or make them from one color of yarn, her family continued to ask for those one-of-a-kind scrap slippers. They had been the source of many jokes and laughs over the years, but they were cherished by all.

  Dawson unlaced his shoe and slipped it off. He tugged on one of the purple and green slippers and wiggled his toes. “Perfect fit.” His smile conveyed his joy and another, warmer sentiment that made Nancy’s cheeks warm.

  “Well, Dawson, I think you’re now officially part of the family now that you have your own pair of slippers,” Adam said, and he and Rebecca dissolved into laughter.

  Dawson wouldn’t trade this Christmas Day with Nancy and her family for all the money in his bank account. To be considered part of this amazing family was an honor. He just wished he could hear Nancy say those same words.

  Shortly after finishing their gift exchange, Rebecca and Adam headed next door to Radford and Evelyn’s house.

  Dawson welcomed the opportunity to spend some time alone with Nancy. The past two days had been packed with activities and they’d had little chance to speak privately.

  He watched as she fussed with the fabric and ribbons strewn across the sofa from their Christmas gifts. Dawson placed his hand over hers, stopping her nervous tidying. “Please sit and have some tea with me.” He released her fingers and poured them each a cup of tea from the pot. “I don’t know if you can tolerate warm tea rather than a steaming cup, but it suits me fine. Will you sit and relax?”

  “Gladly,” she said, settling onto the now cleaned off sofa.

  He watched as she inhaled the scent of tea wafting from her cup before taking a sip. He’d watched her do that many times, a habit he found endearing. He wo
ndered what other little habits and routines she had, and hoped he’d have the opportunity to find out.

  “You’ve got a wonderful life here,” he said. “I’m in awe of your family and deeply grateful you’ve allowed me to be a part of your holiday this year.”

  “I’m glad you’re here, Dawson. I really am.”

  His raised eyebrows made her smile. “Does this mean you might finally tell your family that I’ve proposed to you?”

  Her gaze dropped to her hands folded in her lap.

  “Perhaps you could at least admit to them that we’re more than friends?”

  Her eyes lifted to his. “I’m not… I’d just rather not say anything until… until I can give you an answer. It hurts me to be locked in indecision, because you don’t deserve to be put off like this. But I want to make sure the answer I give you is the right one, for you and for me.”

  “Is it the thought of having to live elsewhere a few months of the year that causes your indecision?” he asked. “Because if it is, Nancy, I’m willing to spend most of our time right here in Fredonia.

  She seemed to deflate and sink back into the cushions. “I wish that’s all it was, Dawson. I truly do. But it’s… It’s complicated.” She met his eyes, her own filled with pain. “I need time to think through all of this.”

  As much as he wanted to talk about whatever it was that was causing her heartache and indecision, he knew she wasn’t ready to talk. “All right,” he said quietly. “What do you say we put all of this aside and just enjoy the day?”

  Her relieved smile made him glad he hadn’t pressed her to talk about her feelings. “That is a wonderful suggestion, Dawson. Thank you. But I do have one question that I simply must ask.”

  He arched an eyebrow, intrigued.

  “Are you going to wear one shoe and one slipper all day?”

  He looked down and saw that he still had the purple and green slipper on his foot. His hoot of laughter filled the parlor.

  As he took off his shoe and pulled on his other slipper, he told Nancy about some of their holiday traditions in Crane Landing. He clasped her hand in his and settled in beside her. “The holiday in Crane Landing is much different than what I’ve experienced here the past few days. Any vessels in the harbor at that time decorate their masts with yards of ribbon and oil lanterns that burn from Christmas Eve through New Year’s Day. After dark each evening, you can see the lanterns shimmering across the icy bay and hear the ship bells ringing. Whichever warehouse at the wharf is empty on Christmas Eve is used to host a big town party with dancing. I haven’t been in years, but my family still goes and they quite enjoy it.”

  “That sounds grand,” Nancy said. “I hope I get to see that, someday.”

  “I do, too.”

  “Why aren’t you there with your family?” she asked, giving him a momentary pang of guilt.

  Dawson sat quietly for a moment. He knew how close Nancy was with her family. The past few days in Fredonia had confirmed how close-knit they were. “Despite evidence to the contrary, my family is important to me.” He shifted on the settee so he was facing her. “After my accident, I spent some time at the asylum.”

  “I know,” she said quietly. “I understand it was an extremely difficult time for you.”

  “After I came back, my brothers hovered over me. I felt smothered by their concern. I felt like Rebecca said she felt after her accident when she was here in Fredonia, as if everyone was looking at her, waiting to see if she was going to completely crack. It was less stressful to spend my time alone. That’s why I got my own place up river. My brothers were busy at the shipyard and with their own families and their own lives, so without me under their roof it made it easier for them to pretend I was fine. And I was, mostly. I was content with my new job and with the companionship of my animals. I think we just fell into an easy, comfortable routine. It’s not that my family isn’t important to me, or that they don’t care about me. If anything, my time here with you and your family has confirmed to me exactly the opposite. And so I plan to change things with my family as soon as I’m back in Crane Landing.”

  “I’m glad to hear that,” she said. For a moment, Nancy studied him. “Thank you for sharing that with me, Dawson. I do know how Rebecca felt here in Fredonia. It was one of the reasons I agreed to go to Crane Landing in the first place. I knew she needed to get away. So, I understand how much pressure a person can be under, feeling the scrutiny of family and friends. I’m glad that you’ve resolved to spend more time with them your family. Maybe that’s not the only thing that will change when you return to Crane Landing.”

  Dawson waited for her to elaborate, but she merely sighed and looked into her tea cup.

  Confused by her comment and the shifting emotion he’d seen in her eyes, he wondered what Nancy was getting at. As much as he intended to follow through on his commitment to spend time with his family, he also hoped that he and Nancy would be doing so together. Is that what she meant by other things changing?

  Chapter Ten

  The rest of Christmas morning at Nancy’s house was quiet. Nancy and Dawson sat in front of the fire, talking about their families, and past Christmases, and the future. They set aside any concerns and enjoyed easy conversation. For two blissful hours they were just two people enjoying each other’s company. Dawson enjoyed her casual touching, the way she’d lay her small hand on his forearm when laughing over a past shared memory, the caress of her thumb over his knuckles when she was talking and unaware of what she was doing. The contact with her grounded him. Maybe he’d been missing more than just social contact with people when he’d withdrawn to his cottage. Now that he was with Nancy, he was coming to realize just how important that emotional and physical connection was. It wasn’t just romantic contact that he’d missed, although he welcomed every opportunity to demonstrate his feelings for Nancy, but rather the simple contact of exchanging a hug with his family or holding Nancy’s hand.

  After relaxing over tea and warm conversation for the morning, Dawson and Nancy worked comfortably side-by-side in the kitchen to prepare a light lunch. Afterward, they bundled up and walked out Liberty Street to Kyle and Amelia’s house to spend time with the family and have Christmas dinner. It all felt very domestic for Dawson, and surprisingly comfortable despite the previous episode at the mill between himself and Kyle.

  When they arrived, they heard the happy squeals and laughter of children and several adults. A grin tipped Nancy’s mouth and she pointed out back. “Sounds as if the kids are already sledding down the hill behind Kyle’s house.”

  “Then let’s join them,” he said, giving her gloved fingers a warm squeeze. He had been deeply moved by the experiences of the last few days, but he didn’t know how to express all that was circling his mind and heart. He needed her to know that he understood how important her family was to her, and that he intended for them to become a part of his life as well.

  In her eyes he saw affection and intimacy, but also conflicting emotions. What was it that was causing her such distress and keeping her from embracing his proposal?

  He tucked her hand under his elbow and escorted her out back. The instant they rounded the back corner of the house, they were accosted by Nancy’s grandchildren.

  “Grandma! Mr. Crane! Come sledding with us,” Lucas, Kyle’s middle son yelled.

  “We got a new toboggan! You can try it out, Grandma!” Jeremiah, Duke’s son added.

  Proud of himself for remembering which child belonged to which son, Dawson looked down the bank where the snowy sledding track cut down through a small gully created by runoff water making its way down into the gorge. The deep track ran somewhat parallel with the very cliff it was descending. “It looks precarious,” he said.

  “It is precarious,” Nancy replied with a laugh, “but we have been sledding down this bank since my boys were little tykes and no one has ever gone over the edge or hit a tree. Well, that isn’t entirely true,” she added with a wince. “Hal crashed into a tree one year
because he was clowning and forgot to pay attention to navigating the track. He shifted his weight the wrong way while going too fast and he flipped the toboggan and launched himself up over the rim and into a sapling.”

  Dawson grimaced. “Well, that is making me reconsider taking a run.”

  Nancy flapped her hand as if to dismiss his concern. “The gully is deep enough that should you run up on the side you’ll tip over rather than shoot up over the rim. Hal crashed because he was being entirely too reckless. That meeting with the sapling effectively corrected that lapse in judgement.”

  Dawson laughed and made a show of peering over the side of the cliff and down into the gorge forty or so feet below. “Shall we try it then?” he asked.

  “Do you dare?” She was absolutely beautiful when her eyes lit with challenge.

  “The question is; do you dare?” he countered, enjoying their repartee.

  Her chin lifted. “Of course. I’ll enjoy the trip down, but I’m not so sure I can climb back up this bank.”

  “Only one way to find out,” Dawson responded.

  “Oh my, it appears we don’t have a toboggan,” she said, not sounding at all disappointed, which made him laugh. “Guess we’ll have to watch instead.”

  Tyler, Radford’s son, passed his toboggan rope to her. “You can use my sled, Grandma.”

  Dawson hooted as Nancy made a face at her grinning grandson. She eyed the hill suspiciously. “I don’t recall this being so steep and… terrifying.”

  Dawson leaned over and whispered in her ear. “Are you afraid of the hill or afraid of being in my arms?”

  “I’m afraid we’ll end up in the middle of the gorge sitting up to our necks in ice water.”

  Dawson laughed at Nancy’s conundrum. “I didn’t think you were afraid of anything, Nancy.”

  While she stood there pondering her situation, Dawson turned to Tyler and placed his finger over his lips, prompting the boy to silence. He positioned the toboggan, sat down, and before Nancy could protest, he pulled her down between his legs. “Hang on, darling!”