“Well, you taught me I didn’t have to let it control everything I do. Look at you. Your dreams of a happily-ever-after came crashing down around you with Scott’s accident. But you didn’t become bitter or angry at the world.”
“I had my moments of despair, believe me.”
His chest ached for her all over again and he cringed at the memory of how he had lashed out at her their last night together in Pine Gulch, accusing her of being the same spoiled girl he had known in high school.
He hadn’t meant any of those ugly words. Even as he had said them, he had known she was a far different woman.
He had been in love with her that night, had been probably since that first moment she had sat beside him on the floor of her spare room and listened to him pour out all the ugly memories he kept carefully bottled up inside.
No. Earlier, he admitted.
He had probably been a little in love with her in high school, when he had thought he hated her. He had just been too afraid to admit the truth to himself.
“But despite everything you went through, you didn’t let your trials destroy you or make you cynical or hard,” he said gently, holding her close. “You still open your heart so easily. It’s one of the things I love the most about you.”
* * *
Tess stared at him, her heart pulsing a crazy rhythm in her chest. He couldn’t have just said what she thought he did. Quinn didn’t believe in love. But the echo of his words resounded in her head.
Still, she needed a little confirmation that she wasn’t completely hearing things.
“You...what?”
His mouth quirked into that half grin she had adored since junior high school.
“You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you? All right. That’s one of the millions of things I love about you. Right up there at the top of the list is your big, generous, unbreakable heart.”
“Not unbreakable,” she corrected, still not daring to believe his words. “It has felt pretty shattered the past three months.”
He let out a sound of regret just before he kissed her again, his mouth warm and gentle. At the devastating tenderness in his kiss, emotions rose in her throat and her eyes felt scratchy with unshed tears.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured between kisses. “So damn sorry. Can you forgive me? I’ve been a stupid, scared idiot.”
He paused, his eyes intense. “You have to cut me a little slack, though.”
“Do I?”
Her arch tone drew a smile. “It’s only fair. I’m a man who’s never been in love before. If you want the truth, it scares the hell out of me.”
I’m a man who’s never been in love before.
The words soaked through all the pain and loneliness and fear of the past three months.
He loved her. This wasn’t some crazy dream where she would wake up once more with a tear-soaked pillow wrapped in her arms. Quinn was standing here in her living room, holding her tightly and saying things she never would have believed if she didn’t feel the strength of his arms around her.
He loved her.
She pulled his mouth to hers and kissed him hard, pouring all the heat and joy and wonder spinning around inside her into her kiss. When she at last drew away, they were both breathing raggedly and his eyes looked dazed.
“I love you, Quinn. I love you so much. I wanted to make a new life for myself here in Portland, a new start. But all I’ve been able to think about is how much I miss you.”
“Tess—” He groaned her name and leaned down to kiss her again but she gathered what tiny spark of strength remained and stepped slightly away from him, desperate for a little space to gather her thoughts.
“I love you. But I have to tell you something...”
“Me first.” He squeezed her fingers. “I know you think we want two different things out of life. I’ll admit, it would probably be a bit of a stretch to say I’ve had some sudden miraculous change of heart and I’m now completely ready to rush right off to find a wedding chapel.”
Well, that would certainly make what she had to tell him a little more difficult. Some of her apprehension must have showed in her eyes because he brought their clasped fingers to his mouth and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand.
“But the thought of being without you scares me a hell of a lot more than the idea of hearts and flowers and wedding cake. I want everything with you. I know I can get there with your help. It just might take me a few months.”
“We have a few months.”
“I hope we have a lot longer than that. I want forever, Tess.”
She gazed at him, dark and gorgeous and male, with clear sincerity in his stunning eyes. He meant what he said. He wasn’t going to use his past as an excuse anymore.
She couldn’t quite adjust to this sudden shift. Only an hour ago, she had been sitting at her solitary dining table with a TV dinner in front of her, lonely and achy and frightened at the prospect of having to face his reaction the next day to the news of the child they had created together.
And here he was using words like forever with her.
She still hadn’t told him the truth, she reminded herself. Everything might change with a few simple words. And though she wanted to hang on to this lovely feeling for the rest of her life, she knew she had to tell him.
Though it was piercingly difficult, she pulled her hands away from his and crossed her arms in front of her.
“I need to tell you something first. It may...change your perspective.”
He looked confused and even a little apprehensive, as if bracing himself for bad news. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. At least I don’t think so. I hope you don’t, either.”
She twisted her fingers together, trying to gather her nerves.
“Tell me,” he said after a long pause.
With a deep breath, she plunged forward. “I don’t know how this happened. Well, I know how it happened. I’m a nurse, after all. But not how it happened, if you know what I mean. I mean, we took precautions but even the best precautions sometimes fail...” Her voice trailed off.
“Tess. Just tell me.”
“I’m pregnant.”
The words hung between them, heavy, dense. He said nothing for a long time, just continued to stare at her.
She searched his gaze but she couldn’t read anything in his expression. Was he happy, terrified, angry? She didn’t have the first idea.
She pressed her lips together. “I know. I was shocked, too. I only found out a few weeks ago and I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you. That’s why I called Easton for your address. I was going to drive to Seattle tomorrow. I’ve been so scared.”
That evoked a reaction from him—surprise.
“Scared? Why?”
She sighed. “I didn’t want you to think it was all part of some grand, manipulative plan. I swear, I didn’t expect this, Quinn. You have to believe me. We were careful. I know we were. The only thing I can think is that...that time in the shower, remember?”
Something flickered across his features then, something that sent heat scorching through her.
“I remember,” he said, his voice gruff.
He didn’t say anything more and after a moment, she wrapped her arms more tightly around herself, cold suddenly despite the fire blazing merrily in her hearth.
“I know this changes everything. You said yourself you’re not ready quite yet for all of that. I completely understand. I don’t want you to feel pressured, Quinn. But I...I love her already. The baby and I will be fine on our own if you decide you’re not ready. I’ll wait as long as it takes. I have savings. I won’t ask anything of you, I swear.”
Again, something sparked in his gaze. “I thought you said you love me.”
“I did. I do.”
“Then how can you think I would possibly walk away now?”
His eyes glittered with a fierce emotion that suddenly took her breath away. Hope began to pulse through her and she curled her fingers into fists, afraid to let it explode inside her.
“A baby.” He breathed out the word like a prayer or a curse, she couldn’t quite tell. “When?”
“Sometime in early July.”
“An Independence Day baby. We can name her Liberty.”
Her laugh was a half sob and she reached blindly for him. He swept her into his arms and pulled her close as that joy burst out like fireworks in the Pine Gulch night sky.
“Liberty Jo,” she insisted.
His eyes softened and he kissed her with more of that heart-shaking tenderness. “A baby,” he murmured after a long while. His eyes were dazed as he placed a hand over her tiny bump and she covered his hand with hers.
“You’re not upset?” she asked.
“Numb is a better word. But underneath the shock is...joy. I don’t know how to explain it but it feels right.”
“Oh, Quinn. That was my reaction, too. I was scared to death to find out I was pregnant. But the idea of a child—your child—filled me with so much happiness and peace. That’s a perfect word. It feels right.”
“I love you, Tess.” He pressed his mouth to hers again. “You took a man who was hard and cynical, who tried to convince himself he was happy being alone, and showed him everything good and right that was missing in his world.”
He pressed his mouth to hers and in his kiss she tasted joy and healing and the promise of a brilliant future.
* * * * *
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ISBN-13: 9781460338537
Safe Harbor
Copyright © 2014 by Harlequin Books S.A.
The publisher acknowledges the copyright holders of the individual works as follows:
Safe Harbor
Copyright © 1987 by Sherryl Woods
A Cold Creek Homecoming
Copyright © 2009 by RaeAnne Thayne
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