“I’m trying my best to forget that part,” he said, meaning it. That little encounter sure wasn’t one of his most favorite moments. Try embarrassing as all get-out.
“And the part where she kissed you.”
Tyler winced. “Nothing gets past you, does it?”
Jay tapped her temple with her forefinger. “Cyborg. Awesome sensory skills, you know.”
He tried to analyze her expression but gave up. “Are you ever gonna forgive me for that one?”
“Don’t be silly. She kissed you. There’s nothing to forgive.”
“So you say. Funny, I’m not so inclined to be forgiving.”
She arched an eyebrow. “Most guys would be thrilled to itty bitty pieces to have a practically naked girl like Nessa throw herself at them.”
He folded his arms across his chest and stared straight ahead. “I’m not most guys.”
“Look, Tyler, she made an error of judgment.”
“Ya think?”
Jay sighed. “She’s had a rough time. She’s doing her best.”
He rolled his head to the side to hit her with his best “you gotta be kidding me” face. “A new wardrobe. Meals cooked and handed to her on a fricking platter. Real nice digs while she scours the papers for jobs that are way out of her league and she hasn’t a hope in hell of getting. Jeez. We should all be so lucky. How long are you going to let her sponge off you, Jay?”
Jay expertly maneuvered the SUV into the next lane. “I’ve been helping her with her résumé, and I assure you, she has no delusions regarding her qualifications. And in answer to your question, for as long as it takes.”
“Well, I hope ‘it’ doesn’t take too long,” Tyler said. “You and I need some alone time.”
“Awww. You say the sweetest things.” She batted her eyelashes at him.
“You’re developing a real smart mouth. You know that?”
She puckered up and blew him a kiss.
Tyler grinned, and turned the music down so it was barely more than a background hum. Combined with the purr of the SUV’s powerful motor it became white noise—perfect for chilling out and teasing the song that had been brewing in the back of his mind for the past couple of days out of hiding.
About half an hour from Snapperton, Jay punctured his productive creative bubble. “Have you given any more consideration to moving into my place permanently?” she asked.
Crap. Thought we’d been through this. Why now? “I know my place is a dump but it’s all I can afford at the moment.”
“I could buy you an apartment of your own.”
Tyler swallowed his shock as best he could. Jeeeezus. This was new. He kept his voice calm and even. “That’s a very generous offer.”
“But?”
“But, no thanks.” Bad enough she’d paid his fees at Wasserman without telling him, and outfitted her apartment with a music room cum art studio for him to use. He had no problem staying over at Jay’s place, but permanently leeching off his outrageously wealthy girlfriend like some pampered gigolo wasn’t his scene. “I want to save enough that I can afford to rent an apartment on my own. Then you can come stay over at my place for a change.”
His tone must have betrayed his annoyance because Jay’s gaze raked his face, searching for clues. Probably analyzing his reactions so she could use them to her advantage and convince him of the logic of her argument. But there were some things that couldn’t be handled with logic. The need to prove himself and make his own way in the world was one of those things.
“I want you to have all the time you need to spend on your music and art,” she said. “I know how important they are to you, and how frustrated you are that you can’t devote more time to them. I know you’re exhausted from studying, working on your projects and portfolios, and working part-time. I also know you’re considering taking another part-time job at the video store. Plus, Pete comes home wasted more often than not, and you have to let him in because he is apparently incapable of remembering where he put his key. And Chandler snores loud enough to wake the dead—”
“Enough, Jay. We’ve talked about his. I’m not ready to move in with you permanently. And you’re not buying me an apartment.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” He adjusted the seat back and when that didn’t help un-kink his spine, linked his hands and stretched them behind his head. He glanced at her, not bothering to hide his doubt. “Really?”
“No.”
There was a world of frustration in that one little word. Tyler tried to explain. “I need to know I can make it on my own. I mean, look at my career choices: music and art. Not exactly careers known for being solid, stable income-earners. About the only worse career I could choose moneywise would be to write books. I have to prove I can support not only myself, but my family, too.”
Jay floored the accelerator and zipped into a barely there gap in the next lane. “But you are not required to support your family. Both your parents are working. Your mother still has use of the black American Express card I gave her. She is fully aware that if your family requires anything at all, she can charge it to the card and I have it covered.”
Tyler waited ’til his stomach was safely back where it belonged before letting out the breath he’d been holding. “By family I mean you, not my mom and dad.”
“But I don’t need your financial support.”
“I know. But that’s not the point.”
“It’s illogical. I have money secreted all over the world in private accounts—more than both of us, your parents, and Caro, could spend in a lifetime.”
“I know. What can I say? It’s a male pride thing.”
“Then male pride is illogical. Would we be arguing if I were a wealthy male and you were female, we were in a relationship, and I wanted to take care of you and ensure your financial security?”
“I know it’s illogical but….” He scrubbed a hand over his face, desperately searching for the right words. Huh. Ironic he had no trouble coming up with song lyrics, but he couldn’t for the life of him think how to explain this simple concept in a way that she would understand and accept.
Thankfully, she quit analyzing his expression to concentrate on the road so he could pry his white-knuckled fingers from the seat and relax a bit. Okay, time for a straight from the heart explanation he’d barely admitted to himself. “If you throw money at me so I can just mooch around and do what I want, I’m afraid I’ll lose the edge.”
“Edge?”
“The thing inside me that makes me want to push myself to write better songs and better music, and keep pushing even when I know it’d be easier to quit this songwriting lark and become a… a….” He wracked his brain for the most boring job he could come up with. “A bank clerk in sleepy old Snapperton. Instead of an unrealistic dreamer with his head in the clouds.”
Jay’s gaze snapped back to him and it was so fierce it rocked him back against the seat. “Who said you were an unrealistic dreamer? Your mother?”
Uh oh. Protective instincts ahoy. But she’d guessed wrong. Two people had accused him of being a dreamer when he’d expressed his desire to become a songwriter, as well as continue exploring his artistic talent, but neither of them had been his mother. She’d been nothing but supportive—of that lifestyle choice, anyway. Grandma Davidson, on the other hand, had been most displeased. She’d had high hopes of him being a doctor or a lawyer, or, to quote her verbatim, “Someone who’ll make a difference.”
“My grandmother—my dad’s mom, for one. But she was just using me to have another dig at my mom. She blames Mom for Dad leaving us.” He mimicked his grandmother’s querulous tones. “Tyler would never have grown up with such ridiculous ideas filling his head if you’d been a better wife to my son, Marissa. If my grandson runs off and joins a commune, you’ll be to blame!”
“This is the same woman who was waiting for your mother to screw up while Michael was AWOL so she could sue for custody of you and your sister.”
Tyler no
dded.
“She sounds like a thoroughly unlikeable person,” Jay said.
“Let’s just say she’s had issues ever since my mom married my dad. No woman was ever gonna be right for her son.”
“And the second person?”
He should have known she wouldn’t let it slide. “Caro.”
Jay rewarded him with such astonished eyes that he laughed. “Yeah, it does sound like one big-ass case of Pot, meet Kettle, since she’s currently doing a BFA in fashion design. Hey, we were arguing at the time. Siblings always know which buttons to push. She knows how important music and art are to me. She didn’t mean it.”
“How can you be sure?” Jay sounded genuinely curious.
“Because she ’fessed up later. She told me if it hadn’t been for me being so determined to follow my dream, she’d never have been brave enough to tell mom and dad she wanted to go into the fashion industry. She reckons she’d probably be studying for a law degree right now, and hating every minute of it.”
Jay nodded. “I understand. And I bet she would graciously thank me if I offered to pay her fees at Eddings.”
Nice segue. Tyler refused to rise to the bait. “Yep, I bet she would, too.”
“Oh.”
She sounded so deflated he turned to stare out the window in the hope it might escape her that he was trying not to laugh.
“I understand you needing an edge.” Her quiet comment drew his full attention again.
“You do?” Progress. Hallelujah.
“It’s believed that artists move people because their songs or paintings or sculptures—or however they choose to express themselves—are true expressions of themselves. And it’s posited that an artist can’t truly portray the pain of loss, or the joy of love, if he or she has never experienced either. You worry that the strength of your lyrics and your music will be diminished if you have everything handed to you, and your life is too easy.”
“Got it in one.”
“Logically, financial security must contribute to an artist being able to spend the time he or she requires to fully immerse himself in, and perfect, his or her craft. There are numerous artists who have gained considerable wealth and have gone on to produce superior products. Do you agree?”
“Yes, but—”
“Yet by your definition, the output of those who have attained wealth will be inferior, lacking heart.”
Tyler refrained from gnashing his teeth. “You’re twisting my argument. Which was your argument, too, by the way.”
She gave him her neutral face. “Of course I am. My outcome is to either have you move in with me permanently, or buy you an apartment and hire you a housekeeper so you will have the opportunity to concentrate on your craft instead of struggling to pay your living expenses. So I will continue to debate the point until we settle on an outcome we can both live with.”
“Or until I threaten you with such dire consequences you promise to never bring up the subject again.”
She cocked her head. “Have you given any thought to these dire consequences? I’m most interested to hear them.”
He groaned. “It’d be so much easier if you were a poor student like me. If you were—”
“Normal? I will never be normal, Tyler.”
“I know. And you know how I know? Because normal people keep their eyes on the road. And normal people don’t majorly freak out their passengers by looking at them while they’re driving. Just sayin’.”
“I like looking at you. And I haven’t had an accident while driving yet.”
“There’s always a first time.”
She grinned at him and turned up the volume on the car stereo before turning her focus back to the traffic. “Don’t worry, Tyler,” she said. “I’d punch out the roof and toss you to safety before we hit anything.”
“Gee. That makes me feel a whole heap better.”
~~~
Every time he visited his hometown Tyler was struck by the sameness. Small businesses started up and shut down with the same monotonous regularity they always had. People moved in. People moved on. Kids graduated high school and either joined the family business or got as far away from Snapperton as humanly possible.
“There’s Fifi!” Jay sounded delighted to spot the scruffy little mongrel out walking with her elderly owner.
“Yay.”
She gave him a look that screamed mischief. “I’ve been thinking of getting a dog like Fifi.”
“Over my dead body.”
“I wasn’t serious. Dogs sense my otherness. I’d feel badly about fooling a pet with pheromones to get it to like me. It seems manipulative, somehow. It wouldn’t be right.”
“Bullshit,” he said. “When it comes to getting pets to like you, and behave themselves, whatever works. Vets prescribe stuff to calm animals down all the time. Caro once told me Bettina’s mom got talked into some fancy mega-expensive thing for their pedigree cat. It plugged into a power socket and automatically released calm-down pheromones into the air.”
“Mmm.”
Tyler wondered whether that “Mmm” might mean he’d soon be sharing Jay’s house with a puppy. So long as it wasn’t a bad-tempered yappy little rat-tailed thing like Fifi he wouldn’t mind.
He stared through the window, soaking up the ambiance of the town he’d grown up in, and thanking all popular gods he’d gotten out.
When Shawn’s dad had been mayor, he’d tried to kick-start the town by pushing through his fancy new housing subdivision, but residents had been slow to embrace it even before Jay had blown one of the houses sky-high to fake her own death. Not even high school drug scandals or far more potentially damaging rumors of meth labs and rampaging drug dealers had managed to put Snapperton on the map. Once the scandal died down and the rumors fizzled out, Snapperton had rolled over and gone back to sleep. It was stuck in a time warp and the long-time residents seemed to prefer it that way. Tyler’s dad, especially.
Tyler suspected his dad had been profoundly relieved that nothing much had changed when he’d returned to Snapperton, almost as if he’d been hanging on to the memories of his former life and they’d been all that’d kept him going. He hadn’t come clean about everything that’d gone on while he’d been AWOL. He’d told them the bare minimum and refused to reveal anything else. What Tyler did know was the threats made against his family had been so chilling, his dad had cut himself off from his wife and kids altogether rather than risk compromising their safety. Only spotting Tyler on the video with Jay had flushed his dad out and brought him back to Snapperton. And even then he’d risked the trip solely to evaluate any potential danger to Tyler before sending in an extraction team to capture Jay.
If Jay hadn’t been careless that one time, if she’d destroyed Matt’s phone before the clip of her tossing Shawn into the Dumpster had gotten out, Tyler knew his dad would still be missing, and his mom would still be wondering what she’d done to drive her husband away.
Jay pulled up at the curb outside his parents’ house. “You ready?” she asked.
“Nope. But let’s get it over with.” He glanced over his shoulder at the back seat. Huh. No point unloading the bags when they would be getting back in the car and driving back to Jay’s apartment if his mom started in again. “We’ll leave the bags here for now.”
“I’ll wait in the car if you like.”
Tyler emphatically shook his head. No fricking way did he want to have to deal with his mom’s reaction if she thought he’d come alone, and then realized Jay was sitting in the car. Better to be upfront, so everyone knew where they stood.
Before he could say a word, Jay lunged from the SUV and sprinted up the driveway, colliding with the figure dressed in black who’d raced toward her. What the—?
He caught sight of a riot of auburn curls and his tension dissolved. Caro. This should be good.
“Omigod! I knew you weren’t dead. I knew it!” His sister crowed with delight. “Can’t believe I didn’t put two and two together before. I mean, Jaime Smy
thson? Puhlease. Couldn’t you have come up with something a little more original than that?”
Tyler rolled his eyes and leaned out the open window. “Why don’t you scream it a bit louder, sis? Someone in the next county might not have heard you.”
“Crap. Sorry!”
Jay patted Caro on the back, whispered something in her ear, and then pulled from her embrace. Whatever she’d said must have done the trick for Caro’s grin reappeared.
Tyler got out of the car and stretched his arms over his head while he observed Jay interact with his sister—the nearest thing Jay had to a BFF and the only other person in her life who unconditionally accepted her for what she was. Caro had never had any issues whatsoever with Jay being a cyborg. But then, Caro wasn’t in love with a cyborg, either. Her boyfriend Matt was most definitely human.
His sister linked arms with Jay and wandered over to greet him with a kiss on the cheek. “Hey, bro. Long time no see!”
She followed up with a punch in the arm that Tyler figured he deserved. “If Mom had told me you were bringing Jay, I’d have dragged Matt along,” she said, almost as if she’d tuned into his thoughts in that uncanny way she had.
She always put it down to a “spooky twin thing”. Tyler secretly agreed, but liked to tell Caro that being whacked in the head by a stray basketball had addled her brains.
“I’m guessing Mom kinda hoped I wouldn’t,” he said.
Caro’s brows crinkled. “Wouldn’t what?”
“Bring me,” Jay said.
The crinkle turned into a full-blown frown as Caro glanced from Jay to Tyler, and back to Jay again. “What are you two not telling me?”
“Your parents discovered I was still alive a few months ago when they visited unexpectedly,” Jay said. “Until then they had no idea that ‘Jaime’ was Jay.”
Her Oh my God was mouthed, as if she couldn’t force the words out.
“Yeah.” Tyler’s attempt at laughter was pathetic—probably because there wasn’t anything remotely funny about the way the truth had come out. “Let’s just say the big reveal didn’t exactly go like I’d planned.”
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