“Zoom up closer, son,” Uncle Bill said. “I think she’s right. Looks like a tiny person sitting on top of a horse. Damn that thing is small. And what’s in the rider’s hand?”
“I think it’s a bow,” Jana said. She immediately thought of Latent.
Knuckles advanced the images to get a view of the glass bead from all angles, at as high a magnification as possible. And sure enough, inside the glass bead was embedded a tiny figurine of a horse with a rider on its back. The rider carried a bow held high above his head.
Bill exhaled. “Well, that just about cracks the case. Anybody care to advance a theory?”
The room fell silent.
“Are we sure this was left by the killer?” Kyle asked. “Why would he leave this behind?”
“You’re assuming it’s a he, and that he left it behind on purpose?” Cade said.
“Well, yes.” Jana said. “First of all, it’s one hell of a strange object to find on a rooftop, to find anywhere for that matter. And think about it. The glass bead has no trace evidence on it whatsoever. Don’t you find that odd? If the bead had been there for a long while, say several weeks, it would at least have evidence of roofing tar, or something similar on it.”
“I suppose you’re right,” Kyle said. “But if the assassin left this here, he left it for us to find.”
“The question is,” Jana said, “why would he leave it behind? Why not leave nothing so that we don’t even have a starting point?”
“And,” Knuckles added, “what does it symbolize? Surely he wouldn’t have gone to all this trouble for nothing.”
“You’re right about that, Knuckles,” Jana said. “He’d want us to find it, and he’d want us to find it for a reason. He’d want us to figure out what it might mean.” She looked at Uncle Bill. “He’s laughing at us. You know he is. He knows we’re in here squirming, and he thinks it’s hysterical.”
“You bring up a good point, Jana,” Bill said. “Let’s add his personality into this. You’ve come to know him, the way he thinks. Jana, what is he thinking?”
Jana closed her eyes in concentration.
“Well,” she replied, “we know it wasn’t him who personally killed Latent. Jarrah was in the hillsides of Spain and murdered my friend Gilda at the time of Director Latent’s assassination. That much, we’re sure. So, he’s hired someone else to work for him. He’d want to give us a clue to follow. Remember what Jarrah said? He said this was a game and we were way behind.” Her eyes closed harder. “He was babbling on about something else. He said something about the word, ‘come.’ Like he was quoting something or reading it.”
“And a voice like thunder,” Knuckles said. “A voice like thunder. Anybody got any ideas? I’m drawing a blank on that one. You sure he’s not losing his mind again?”
“No,” Jana said. “In fact, I don’t think he’s losing his mind at all. I think for the first time in two or three years he feels on top of the world. He just pulled off what he would have considered to be his life’s work—to detonate a nuclear device on US soil. No, he’s thinking clearly. Which reminds me, I’ve been thinking that the psychological profile we’ve been building is complete crap.”
“What are you talking about?” Cade demanded. “The guy has been a lunatic since the moment we first encountered him. Do you think he suddenly regained his sanity, if he ever had any in the first place?”
“Yes, I do. He’s different now. He almost sounds, I don’t know, relaxed. I wouldn’t be surprised if what he told me on the phone, that quote he made, and the evidence we found, mean something.”
Cade stood and squinted at her. “Are you sure you’re not getting too close to this thing?” He regretted the words and the tone of his voice the moment he spoke them.
Uncle Bill scowled at the two of them. “All right, you two, what’s going on? It’s not my place to get into your personal business, but you two are starting to get at each others’ throats and that compromises the mission. That goes for everyone here. I expect total professionalism in this room. Am I understood? We’ve got a terrorist situation to deal with.”
“Yes, sir,” came the resounding response.
“Cade, he’s called me on the phone twice. He sounds like a person on a mission, a mission he’s happy about. That’s all I can tell you.”
“All right, okay. It’s just a little hard for me to swallow. And we don’t seem to be getting anywhere. So we have this bizarre dialog from him where he’s talking about a voice and thunder and the word ‘come’ and now we’ve got this stupid little glass bead with a tiny guy riding a horse in it. Are you telling me you think somehow these clues are related to one another? What do they mean?”
Jana sat. “I have no idea.” She placed her head on the desk.
Knuckles started to pace the floor, mumbling to himself. Then his voice became more audible.
“A figurine of a tiny little horse with a rider on it. A horse with a rider on it, and the rider is carrying a bow? Does that just mean Jarrah had an assassin use a bow to kill with? No, it can’t be that simple.”
Knuckles paced back and forth and everyone followed his footsteps. He was lost in concentration. Uncle Bill watched him and smiled, knowing the boy was working.
“A voice like thunder. Who’s got a voice like thunder? What is this, something to do with medieval gods? Or superheroes?”
“Superheroes?” Cade said. “I’m not picturing Jarrah, who grew up in the Middle East, as someone too wrapped up in Iron Man and Thor and all that.”
Knuckles continued. “You’re probably right. Well, I guess you’d have to be right about something, wouldn’t you?”
Uncle Bill chuckled.
“Wait a minute,” Knuckles said. “What about in the Koran? Is there something described where there’s a voice like thunder? Anyone got a Koran?”
“Yeah,” Kyle said. “I carry one with me at all times.”
“Smart-ass,” the boy said. “Hey, Jana? Oh crap, is she asleep?”
Uncle Bill stood and looked. “Leave her be. She’s been through hell. And I’m getting concerned that she could be entering a state of depression. Victims of post-traumatic stress syndrome are certainly not immune to that.”
Cade lowered his head. “I shouldn’t have spoken to her like that. I’m starting to lose my temper awfully quickly. And she is too, to be honest. I think that time in Spain did her a lot of good. But when you put her back into a pit of terrorists, I think all of the stress comes crashing down.”
Bill glanced at Kyle then back to Cade. “She’s not made of steel, son,” Uncle Bill said. “And you two don’t exactly live normal lives, do you? We seem to go from one spate of terrorist attacks to another. Let’s face it, we humans aren’t built for this.” Bill exhaled. “But someone’s got to do it. Someone’s got to stand in the gap.” He spoke louder now. “I want everybody to listen up. This might seem like just a few sniper attacks. But this is just a buildup. This is how Jarrah works. He starts with a series of small attacks to disorient us, and then he tries to pull off something huge. We can’t make any mistakes like we did last time. He got the best of us and shouldn’t be underestimated.”
Kyle put his hand on Cade’s shoulder and spoke just low enough to not be heard by the others. “Bud, I’m worried about her. You spend more time with her than we do. Is she okay?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Hey, don’t get upset. I just want to make sure she’s up to the call if anything bad goes down.”
“Up to the call? Wait a minute,” Cade said as he stood. “She might be suffering from PTSD, but I’m getting the feeling you don’t think she should be here.”
“Cade, we’ve been friends since undergrad. You’ve known me a long time. Have I ever done anything to break the trust between us?”
“No, of course not, but—”
“I’m trying to look at this objectively. So let me ask you a question. If the three of us walked out there and the shit went down with Jarrah
, do you really think she’d be able to handle it?”
“Kyle, I’m not even able to handle it.”
Kyle waited and finally Cade continued. “I don’t know,” he looked at Jana asleep on the desk. “I thought I knew, but I’m not sure anymore.”
“Maybe Jana was right,” Kyle said. “Maybe the three of us should leave all this behind and go down to the beach and set up a little tiki hut. We could sell suntan lotion.”
Cade smirked. “That idea is sounding better and better all the time.”
19
TREMBLING PSYCHE
Bowling Brook Apartments, Laurel, Maryland
In the morning, Jana startled herself awake and found she was in bed at her apartment. What was bizarre was that she could not remember how she got here the night before.
And then another realization came to her. It was the knowledge that her post-traumatic stress disorder had made an ugly return. I’m losing track of things, she thought.The notion turned her stomach.
It was then that she heard footsteps coming from the main area of the apartment.
Remind me again why I refused Secret Service protection?
The footsteps moved back and forth and Jana reached to her nightstand and pulled the 9 mm from its holster. She slid to the floor and crouched behind the bed.
The footsteps grew closer.
Fear impinged between her normal thought processes.
Jana’s finger found the trigger guard, and a voice began to reverberate in her head. It was the voice of her shooting instructor from her trainee days at Quantico.
Double tap, center mass, then one to the head.
Her heart rate exploded. She pointed the weapon at the closed bedroom door, but as the smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted toward her, tension eased from her shoulders.
The door opened and Cade’s eyes locked on the weapon.
She lowered it but thought, Paranoia, another warning sign of PTSD.
“Cade, dammit you scared the shit out of me.”
“Good God, Jana. Put that thing away. Didn’t you know it was me?”
“No, I don’t even remember coming back to the apartment. How did I get here?”
“Kyle and I brought you. What? You mean you don’t remember? The three of us drove from the office after you woke up.”
“After I woke up? Woke up where? You mean I fell asleep at the office?”
“You don’t remember putting your head down on the desk yesterday afternoon? We were right in the middle of a briefing and we looked over. You were asleep.”
Memory loss. It’s happening. Oh my God.
The blankness on her face signaled to Cade that she had no recollection of the events.
“Babe, this isn’t good. Didn’t the psychologist say something like this could happen?”
At first Jana ignored the question, but then thought better of it. “Yes, she said this was a possibility. But my PTSD was manifesting itself in those blackouts I was having, not this.”
“Those blackouts you were having? What about Spain?”
She put her firearm away, and continued. “We’re getting off topic. What did I miss while I was asleep yesterday?”
“Off topic? No, we’re not getting off topic. We are talking about your PTSD. You’re just trying to change the subject.”
“I don’t have time for PTSD! There’s a nuclear weapon on the loose and I have to stop it.”
“There you go again. You think it’s just you against Jarrah.” Cade shook his head. He was getting nowhere and he knew it. “We were talking about the glass bead and the potential symbolism. I’m worried about you, Jana. I had hoped your time in Spain would’ve helped you put the PTSD, the stress, the shooting, behind you. But if you continue to work at the bureau, I’m not sure it’s ever going away.”
Cade drew in a deep breath, then continued. “We’re growing apart, Jana. You and I were doing so well. We were growing closer. We spent time together in Spain. But when you decided to take a leave of absence and go hike the trail, that’s when things started to fall apart.”
“Cade, I needed that time. I needed to go on that hike. The Camino Trail isn’t just some place where I spent two months away from you. That trail has been helping people come to grips with the turmoil in their lives for over a thousand years. People come from all over the world to take that hike. It’s a spiritual pilgrimage.”
“I know, I know,” he replied. “The Camino Trail means a lot of things to a lot of people. You told me. But you’re still not addressing the problem. When the terrorism case went bad last year, and it turned out we were following the wrong suspect, it wasn’t just a failure on your part, it was a failure on mine as well. And because of it, countless people died in a blast we should have been able to stop. And then we had to watch the news of all the devastation. Did you ever stop to think that I needed you during that time?”
“You needed me for sex.”
“That’s crap!” Cade yelled. “I can’t believe you said that. Jana, this job is tearing you apart.” He was almost yelling. “It’s changing you. You are nothing like the girl I fell in love with.” His face flushed. “I don’t know you anymore. You have grown too accustomed to lying to yourself.”
“Oh, and you don’t lie?”
“No, not with you I don’t. I tell you everything. But you, you hold it all inside, then you lie to me and tell me you’re fine. You won’t share anything with me.”
“The difference is I lie for a reason.” Wet heat spread across her face, but she was not about to let the building torrent of emotions get the best of her.
“You mean you lie for a living!” Cade said as a vein protruded from his forehead.
“You know what I do for a living. I’m a federal agent. You know I can’t share everything with you.”
“I don’t expect you to share everything from your job with me. But you don’t share anything with me. I want to know you, but you won’t open up.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” This time, her stomach clenched, a telltale sign that the emotional dam was about to break.
“Jana, I’m in love with you. Don’t you understand that? I want to know you. I want to know the Jana that was still herself when we first met.”
“I’m still her.”
Cade put his arms on her shoulders. “Baby, you are not yourself anymore. This job of yours, chasing terrorists, it’s changed you. My God, you don’t even see it, do you?”
She folded her arms into his chest as he pulled her closer.
“I don’t know what I see anymore.”
“It’s all the stress. It’s you trying to be perfect. It’s you trying to fit in with the boy’s club of the FBI. And,” he pushed her back to arm’s length, “it’s those three bullet-hole scars on your chest. That’s what you see when you look in the mirror. You see those scars and you remember the flash of the muzzle, and you’re not dealing with it.”
Jana yanked free.
“Yes, dammit! That’s what I see! Those scars are a gruesome reminder of the shooting, and I can’t get away from them! Every day I see them in the mirror and I think back to it. I can’t help it, Cade, I can’t.”
“Babe, I was with you when you went through the whole post-traumatic stress thing. But I thought you had worked through it. You saw the counselor for so long. But now, it’s happening again.” His lower lip trembled. “It’s like watching a freight train come off the rails.”
Jana’s arms wrapped around her own torso and she slumped to her knees.
“No, no! Jana, don’t drift off. Look at me.” But her face washed pale and her shoulders began to shake. “Stay with me, baby. Stop it before it gets hold of you. Focus on me.”
Her eyes drifted to his, and the grip of the impending post-traumatic-stress episode began to abate.
Her voice lowered to a whisper, and sounds came out in fits and starts. “How am I going to do this?”
“You’re going to do this one day at a time. You and me, tog
ether.”
She rocked back and forth, fighting the emotional forces tearing into her psyche.
“Why do you stay with me, Cade?”
“I love you, that’s why. And I don’t want to hear that crap. Look at me. You are the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I was going nowhere when you found me.”
“I didn’t find you. Back then, I just convinced you to be a material witness in the largest terrorism investigation since 9/11.”
“No, it’s deeper than that. Before you walked into my life, I had no purpose. Didn’t you know that? My life was just one of waking up and going to work. You gave me purpose.”
“You make it sound so noble. Cade, I used you. I used you to break open the investigation. I used you to further my career.”
The scowl on his forehead deepened.
“You used me? Is that what you think? Jana, you had no choice. It was your job to investigate that terrorism case. And it wasn’t just to further your career. I happened to be the only person who had access to the encrypted files that my employer was trying to hide. Without those files, more Americans would have been killed in terror attacks. You didn’t use me, you did your job. And you saved lives in the process.”
A tear rolled down Jana’s cheek, and she kissed him.
“You’re too good to me.”
20
A DISCOVERY
Bowling Brook Apartments, Laurel, Maryland
A ring tone indicating a text message startled both Cade and Jana as their phones rang simultaneously. Cade pulled his out of his pocket and looked.
“It’s the office. Dammit, they must have something important. We’re supposed to come back there right now.”
“Jana grabbed a hair brush and ran it through her hair, then pulled it back into a ponytail.
“The bureau just doesn’t give a girl time to get herself ready, now does it?”
“As we said before, these terrorists have no sense of timing.”
Back at NSA headquarters, Cade and Jana walked into the situation room. Uncle Bill, Knuckles, and Kyle were gathered around a table, but no one sat.
Breach of Protocol Page 6