He never thought that anger could have a cute side—but on her, it did. It was hard for him not to smile. “I thought women liked mystery in a man.”
“For about five minutes,” she retorted. “Then we like some answers.” And she wasn’t about to back off or let him go until she had at least a few.
“Well—” Kane draped an arm over her shoulders as he steered her toward the elevator “—let’s just say I’m not an orderly.”
“I didn’t ask you what you’re not,” Marja snapped.
“I asked you what you are. I just ran up eight flights of stairs to find out what happened to a man who apparently doesn’t exist.”
The elevator came. With his hand to her back, Kane gently pushed her in. Her blurted statement intrigued him. “You ran up eight flights of stairs?”
“Yes.” The word fairly crackled with anger.
His eyes slid over her quickly as he pressed for the ground floor. “That explains why you’re wetter than I am.”
She shoved the wet bangs out of her eyes impatiently. “Well I’m really glad we solved that for you.” Her voice fairly dripped of sarcasm. “Now why don’t you—”
His voice cut through hers like a hot knife through butter. “Got another question for you. You said something earlier—”
She instantly knew where he was going, but that wasn’t one of the things she wanted clarified. “I said a lot of things earlier.”
“Just before you left,” he continued as if she hadn’t interrupted, “you said you loved me.” His eyes on hers, Kane looked at her, waiting.
That had been a stupid thing to say, in light of what she now knew. Or, more to the point, didn’t know. Marja shrugged, doing her best to seem indifferent, but anger got in her way, breaking through. “Stress of the moment. Didn’t mean anything by it.”
“Oh.” He continued watching her. Ordinarily he would have shrugged it off. Retreated. But something held him in place. “Too bad.”
“Did you want me to mean something by it?”
The elevator came to the ground floor. Again, as the doors opened, he guided her out. “Would my answer influence yours?”
The man really didn’t have any experience in relationships, did he? “Hell, yes.”
To her surprise, Kane shook his head. “Then I can’t say.”
She was getting a very bad headache, brought on more by this strange conversation than by what had transpired before it. “Why?” she demanded.
Now that the all-clear signal had been sounded, an inordinate number of law enforcement personnel as well as firefighters milled around on the ground floor, giving the area one last once-over before allowing staff and patients back into the hospital.
Moving slightly ahead of Marja, Kane forged a path for them. “Because then I won’t know if you really do or not.”
She stopped moving. When he turned to look at her, she snapped, “Okay, okay, okay, I love you,” she admitted grudgingly. “But you don’t have to worry. I’m not planning on stalking you.”
His mouth curved. “You just ran up eight flights of stairs in an airless building that, as far as you knew, was all set to blow up, just to get to me.”
He would throw that back in her face. Marja’s jaw hardened. “You’re an undercover lawyer, aren’t you? You twist words for a living.”
They’d reached the main entrance, but instead of going out, Kane suddenly pulled her over into the deserted X-ray facility. Pushing the door open, he drew her inside.
Now what? she wondered, startled.
“No,” he told her, his expression deadly serious. “I’m a CIA agent. My name’s Kane Donnelly and until you came along, I thought I was perfect for any job the Company threw my way because there was nothing in my life holding me back.” His eyes washed over her, absorbing her. Loving her. “Nothing and no one that meant anything to me.”
Her breath caught in her throat as she looked up at him. “And now?”
“And now,” he told her honestly, “I’m not so sure.”
For a moment she’d hoped…She really was an idiot, wasn’t she? “Doesn’t sound very positive.”
His mouth curved just the slightest bit. “I’m positive I’m not sure.”
She sighed. He was just giving her double-talk. “And what is that supposed to mean?”
Kane opened the door again, letting in the noise and commotion of the rest of the world. Taking her hand, he stepped out of the room. “I’ll let you know when I work it out.”
“I worked it out.”
She almost hadn’t answered the quick rap on her door when she’d heard it. It was a little after 11:00 p.m. and she was still trying to wind down from today, still trying to sort things out in her own head. Still trying to tell herself that she’d only gotten caught up in the momentum and didn’t really feel what she knew to be true in her heart.
The bomb scare chaos at the hospital had finally settled down. All the patients were back in their beds and the hospital routine was more or less back on schedule. But the events had brought a new sense of alarm to Patience Memorial so security, at least for the time being, was being beefed up and in some cases, doubled. Her father’s firm had anted up every available body to do duty at P.M. until both the ambassador’s daughter and the banking CEO were discharged. The hospital board convened on Monday to discuss a permanent hike in security personnel to ensure that something like this never happened again.
She hadn’t seen Kane since they’d walked out of the X-ray facility together. Part of her was fairly certain that she would never see him again. That was what tonight was all about, convincing herself that she didn’t care if she did or not.
And yet, here he was, making her heart skip all over again. Was he here with bad news, or good? She couldn’t tell by his expression or even his tone. What made him a good operative made him a frustrating man to deal with to her.
“And what is it, exactly, that you’ve worked out?” she asked, closing the door.
He turned around to look at her. This afternoon had been one hell of a whirlwind. But throughout it all, he’d kept thinking of her. Whether he’d wanted to or not. Somewhere along the line, he’d decided that he wanted to. It had made up his mind for him.
“That I want you in my life.”
“Really?” She wasn’t going to take what he said at face value, wasn’t going to just jump into his arms again—no matter how much she wanted to. He was going to have to spell things out for her.
“Then why do you look like someone who just resigned himself to a death sentence?” she challenged.
That made him laugh. “You might not have noticed this, but I’m not very expressive.”
It was his laugh that put her at ease. He didn’t laugh often and when he did, it didn’t sound as relaxed as it did just now. “I did notice that. It’s something you’re going to have to work on.”
He fit his hands around her waist, drawing her to him. “Does that mean you’re going to try to change me?”
Oh damn, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t talk herself out of him. Couldn’t convince herself that she didn’t care. Not even when every cell in her body had just launched into the Hallelujah Chorus at the mere touch of his hand.
“Just enough to let me know that I matter.”
“You matter, Marja,” he told her, his voice low, brushing along her skin. “You matter.”
Just as she was about to say something, Kane kissed her, long and hard, stealing away not only her words but every single thought in her head.
Framing her face with his hands, he looked at her for a long moment. “I love you,” he told her. “I didn’t think I understood what those words meant, but now I do. I didn’t care about being blown up, but I cared about you being blown up. I didn’t want anything happening to you. If it had, I wouldn’t have been able to continue.”
“Continue,” she echoed, shaking her head. “Not very good with romantic terms, are you?”
He couldn’t argue with her. “At
least you know I haven’t had practice.”
“Then you’re going to need to practice,” she told him, lacing her fingers around his neck. “With me. A lot.” She punctuated each sentence with a kiss, each one lasting a little longer than the last.
No one could raise his body temperature faster than she could. It had been a hell of a long day, but peace was restored for another day, God was in His heaven and all was right with the world. Or so his handler liked to say. All he knew was that he didn’t want to be any place but here. With her.
Kane glanced toward the rear of the apartment. “Are you alone?”
She nodded. “Tania’s with Jesse.” Bless her, she added silently.
“Good.” His eyes on hers, he began to unbutton her shirt. “Oh, by the way…”
This was where he dropped his kind of bomb on her, she thought, bracing herself. “What?”
“How do you feel about marriage?”
She stopped his hands and looked at him, stunned. He wasn’t saying what she thought he was saying—was he?
“Are you taking a survey or asking me, personally?”
His smile went straight to her bones. The man really did have a very nice smile, she thought breathlessly. “I don’t believe in surveys.”
Wanting to scream yes, Marja took a deep breath instead. She wanted this to be absolutely clear with no room for misunderstanding. “I need a full sentence. Please.”
For the first time in his life, he had no doubts about his decision. “Will you marry me?”
Oh God, she was going to cry. “And become Mrs. Secret Agent Man?”
“And become the best thing in my life.”
She could feel emotions bursting inside of her like Fourth of July fireworks. “I stand corrected. You can say romantic things.”
God, but he did love her. He hadn’t realized how very much until just now. Until he was faced with the thought that she might say no. “Then it’s yes?”
She laughed, raising herself up on her toes. “If you can’t figure that out, you need to go back to Secret Agent school.”
“Later.” He gathered her closer to him. “I’ve got something more important to do right now.”
“You bet you do,” she said before she offered up her mouth to his.
ISBN: 978-1-4268-1696-3
SECRET AGENT AFFAIR
Copyright © 2008 by Marie Rydzynski-Ferrarella
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Secret Agent Affair Page 16